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Indeed, the only way this film would be guaranteed to pass $2billion is if there was some pussy smashing
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May 20, 2018 08:37
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Owlofcreamcheese posted:Avengers: tony and quill very explicitly have sex 
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May 20, 2018 08:38
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I’ve been developing a theory that ‘shipping’ occurs when fans hyper-attuned to sexual (esp. gay) subtext encounter other subtexts that they don’t recognize or can’t fully process. So, like, Rogers being Stark’s employee, violating the Geneva Conventions to pay for his bland apartment, is interpreted as them just touching dicks together.Ghost Leviathan posted:see also the politics being too vague and confused (but conservative leaning) so they don't piss off the chud demographic. The problem’s not that the politics are vague; they aren’t vague enough to escape scrutiny. The conflict in Avengers 3 is very specifically a false conflict between total (economic) stagnation and technocapitalist innovation - iPod revolution.
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May 20, 2018 09:00
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Alan_Shore posted:Indeed, the only way this film would be guaranteed to pass $2billion is if there was some pussy smashing     
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May 20, 2018 09:05
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SuperMechagodzilla posted:I’ve been developing a theory that ‘shipping’ occurs when fans hyper-attuned to sexual (esp. gay) subtext encounter other subtexts that they don’t recognize or can’t fully process. So, like, Rogers being Stark’s employee, violating the Geneva Conventions to pay for his bland apartment, is interpreted as them just touching dicks together. You just realised?
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May 20, 2018 09:11
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So could scarlet witch have just killed vision to destroy the gem? If so she seems very selfish.
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May 20, 2018 11:37
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Vitamin P posted:So could scarlet witch have just killed vision to destroy the gem? If so she seems very selfish. She totally did that, dude.
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May 20, 2018 11:38
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Billzasilver posted:She totally did that, dude. But could she have done it before all those wakandans died ?
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May 20, 2018 11:48
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Just murder the 2nd most powerful superhuman on the planet for unclear reasons when the doctor is half an hour from saving his life? Yeah I suppose so.
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May 20, 2018 11:51
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It's not unclear reasons it would stop Thanos, or anyone else, being able to use the infinity gauntlet. And how many lives are being lost to buy them that half hour? 'We dont trade lives' well clearly yer do.
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May 20, 2018 11:57
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Alan_Shore posted:Indeed, the only way this film would be guaranteed to pass $2billion is if there was some pussy smashing Avatar and Titanic were all about the romantic love story
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May 20, 2018 13:42
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SuperMechagodzilla posted:I’ve been developing a theory that ‘shipping’ occurs when fans hyper-attuned to sexual (esp. gay) subtext encounter other subtexts that they don’t recognize or can’t fully process. So, like, Rogers being Stark’s employee, violating the Geneva Conventions to pay for his bland apartment, is interpreted as them just touching dicks together. Straight people get to see yucky heterosexuals date in nearly every movie released. People who are gay get like one gay relationship as a one second mention once a year in a film, so they have to take analogies as their only media representatives.
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May 20, 2018 13:57
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Owlofcreamcheese posted:Straight people get to see yucky heterosexuals date in nearly every movie released. People who are gay get like one gay relationship as a one second mention once a year in a film, so they have to take analogies as their only media representatives. And historically, and also probably recently, it was a lot more common to have gay relationships implied subtextually or symbolically without being actually stated to get under the radar of censorship.
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May 20, 2018 14:04
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Billzasilver posted:Just murder the 2nd most powerful superhuman on the planet for unclear reasons when the doctor is half an hour from saving his life? What exactly are (were?) Vision's powers anyway? It's been a while since I've seen Avengers 2 or Civil War. He flies and has that dope head laser?
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May 20, 2018 14:40
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C-Euro posted:What exactly are (were?) Vision's powers anyway? It's been a while since I've seen Avengers 2 or Civil War. He flies and has that dope head laser? He can also just straight-up phase through matter. Used it to walk through walls in Civil War and rip Ultrons from the inside out in Age of Ultron. Once he got stabbed with that "Very Special" spear though, it seems his powers were jammed. Gatts posted:Avatar and Titanic were all about the romantic love story Titanic, 1997: Off-screen gently caress and some boob Avatar, 2009: On-screen alien gently caress and some bloob Infinity War, 2018: Off-screen robo gently caress, but no groob. Come on, Hulk, take one for the team.
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May 20, 2018 14:54
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Alan_Shore posted:Indeed, the only way this film would be guaranteed to pass $2billion is if there was some pussy smashing https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nV-RBeDt2B0
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May 20, 2018 14:59
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ricdesi posted:He can also just straight-up phase through matter. Used it to walk through walls in Civil War and rip Ultrons from the inside out in Age of Ultron. Once he got stabbed with that "Very Special" spear though, it seems his powers were jammed. Wouldn't that be Gamora? Or She-Hulk?
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May 20, 2018 15:12
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ricdesi posted:He can also just straight-up phase through matter. Used it to walk through walls in Civil War and rip Ultrons from the inside out in Age of Ultron. Once he got stabbed with that "Very Special" spear though, it seems his powers were jammed. Seems OP.
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May 20, 2018 15:15
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Vision is one of the most powerful Avengers and would be a moderately useful X-Man. He's Kitty Pryde with an exo-suit and laser pistol. More useful than Claw-Man, but less than Weather Witch, Mind Witch or German Bampher. This is why the Avengers have always been kind of a crap team, btw. With the exception of Scarlet Witch every Avenger's power is some variation on "hits things good." Shield, Hammer, Thruster-Beam, Speedfist, Punching Glove Arrow... it all comes down to "hits things good." So Vision has a moderately useful ability where he can become ghostlike and float and then suddenly weigh as much as an irridium core and hit good(!) which is why he has to go haywire/die every story arc 'cuz he's too powerful. poo poo, Wonder Man... hits things good. The one X-Man they drafted was... Beast? They never even had the shrinking characters murder people in gross ways until the Ultimate Comics. In the movies Ant-Man only ever shrinks to... hit good. Whereas in the X-Men you have a shitload of Utility Players like Iceguy, Exploder Thief, Girl Data, Human Battery Cop, Purple Ninja, Gimmick Stealer Lass, etc. Makes for far more interesting stories.
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May 20, 2018 15:30
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C-Euro posted:Tony hooks up with that reporter at the beginning of Iron Man, he's been a sex-haver since day 1. Asterisk on this, as IM1 was pre-Disney. A bunch of convenient plot points to de-sexify Tony have come up. He's now too full of anxiety to gently caress unless it was for procreation with Pepper.
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May 20, 2018 15:54
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Ghost Leviathan posted:Wouldn't that be Gamora? Or She-Hulk? Avengers 4: The One Where Bruce Bangs Gamora C-Euro posted:Seems OP. Oh christ, yes. Soon as Age of Ultron ended it seemed clear Thanos was going to have to rip the Mind Stone out of his head, since Vision would be more or less invincible otherwise.
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May 20, 2018 16:01
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Vitamin P posted:But could she have done it before all those wakandans died ? I don't get why people are hung up on this, it's the MCU so when we finally get casualty figures it'll be like "22 Wakandans died in the fighting with Thanos's troops, and we will avenge them."
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May 20, 2018 16:17
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Vitamin P posted:But could she have done it before all those wakandans died ? But half of them died anyway though? It didn't matter. The only stone that it seemed logical to destroy was the Time Stone if you can literally turn back time and keep redoing the battle until you get the rest of the stones.
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May 20, 2018 16:27
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Harime Nui posted:Vision is one of the most powerful Avengers and would be a moderately useful X-Man. He's Kitty Pryde with an exo-suit and laser pistol. More useful than Claw-Man, but less than Weather Witch, Mind Witch or German Bampher. Renaming my Taxes 2014 folder Girl Data.
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May 20, 2018 16:52
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Space Fish posted:He also enjoys some robo-strippers in GotG 2, right? Like every geek that goes to a strip club, he merely nuts in his pants.
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May 20, 2018 17:11
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Harime Nui posted:Vision is one of the most powerful Avengers and would be a moderately useful X-Man. He's Kitty Pryde with an exo-suit and laser pistol. More useful than Claw-Man, but less than Weather Witch, Mind Witch or German Bampher. Thor has some pretty useful lightning stuff. He doesn't even need a hammer to do it! Also I like to think whoever designed Thor's new weapon played a lot of Terraria. ProjektorBoy posted:He's now too full of anxiety to gently caress Don't doxx me.
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May 20, 2018 18:08
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Isn't Thor's new hammer just exactly the Ultimates version? But in any case I'm pretty sure the idea of a half-axe/half-hammer has been around since shortly after axes and hammers both were.
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May 20, 2018 18:33
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Guy A. Person posted:Isn't Thor's new hammer just exactly the Ultimates version? In the comics, Beta Ray Bill (an alien who took over the role of Thor for a while) was given his own version of Mjolnir which was half hammer/half axe, and that was back in 1984. http://marvel.wikia.com/wiki/Stormbreaker
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May 20, 2018 19:02
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Yo I know people are like why does thor even get a new hammer it invalidates thor 3 and blah blah poopy doopy, but if you didn't think Thor's new axe being partially made out of Groot isn't sick as hell, well you can just go eat some spiders, buddy
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May 20, 2018 19:13
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I liked stormbreaker but I still thought it was a little silly how they just casually killed off all of Thor's buddies again. Like, would it have killed them to keep 142/Valkyrie around at least?
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May 20, 2018 19:17
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Macaluso posted:Yo I know people are like why does thor even get a new hammer it invalidates thor 3 and blah blah poopy doopy, but if you didn't think Thor's new axe being partially made out of Groot isn't sick as hell, well you can just go eat some spiders, buddy Come to think of it why didn't the hilt vanish
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May 20, 2018 19:27
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RBA Starblade posted:Come to think of it why didn't the hilt vanish Cause it wasn’t on Groot anymore!
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May 20, 2018 19:31
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RBA Starblade posted:Come to think of it why didn't the hilt vanish Presumably for the same reason Doctor Strange's cloak and Bucky's arm did
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May 20, 2018 19:32
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Macaluso posted:Yo I know people are like why does thor even get a new hammer it invalidates thor 3 and blah blah poopy doopy, but if you didn't think Thor's new axe being partially made out of Groot isn't sick as hell, well you can just go eat some spiders, buddy It doesn't "invalidate" it per se because Thor 3's character arc was about getting his mojo back by realizing he didn't need a hammer while Infinity War is about getting a weapon that could kill a super-god, but it is kind of a muddy continuation. The bigger crime was taking the hopeful ending of Thor 3 and immediately smash cutting to Thanos murdering everyone offscreen (until it's revealed in Thor 4 that Valkyrie and Rock dude went on a side quest just before that or whatever)
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May 20, 2018 19:41
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RBA Starblade posted:Come to think of it why didn't the hilt vanish So Thor and rocket can stare at it longingly next movie and make me cry
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May 20, 2018 20:03
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Guy A. Person posted:It doesn't "invalidate" it per se because Thor 3's character arc was about getting his mojo back by realizing he didn't need a hammer while Infinity War is about getting a weapon that could kill a super-god, but it is kind of a muddy continuation. Thor mentions in the film that Thanos "killed half my people", we don't see the Grandmaster's ship anywhere in the wreckage, for that matter we see that the Asgardian ship is in two pieces and Thanos only blows up the half that Thor was in, not the rear section of the ship, and Thanos' whole bit is that he kills half of the available victims. It's therefore perfectly reasonable to assume that Thor, Loki, Hulk, and Heimdall made a stand with the more combat capable survivors while Valkyrie and Korg and whomever else they want to bring back for Thor 4 (assuming that there IS a Thor 4 and that Thor survives Avengers 4) were left to defend the rest. (I'd say "women and children" but between Sif, Valkyrie, and Hela one can argue that female Asgardians are more dangerous than their male counterparts.) Either they escaped on the Grandmaster's Party Boat, or they're in the unblowed up half of the bigger ship. Now the better question would be "then why isn't Thor going to find them all right away?" Which is a good point, but him being to traumatized and unable to see past what he's lost to recognize what he still has left fits Thor's character well, particularly since he can blend revenge with a legitimate "I'm helping save 1/2 the universe!" What I do think was a mistake, though, was giving Thor a new eye. Keeping Thor with the eyepatch not only represents the wisdom he gained in the battle with Hela, but connects him with his father, especially since Thor has taken Odin's place as the leader of Asgard. Also, it looked cooler. 
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May 20, 2018 20:11
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Seriously hoping Lady Sif makes a return in the next one, she's been sorely missed.
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May 20, 2018 20:19
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jng2058 posted:Thor mentions in the film that Thanos "killed half my people", we don't see the Grandmaster's ship anywhere in the wreckage, for that matter we see that the Asgardian ship is in two pieces and Thanos only blows up the half that Thor was in, not the rear section of the ship, and Thanos' whole bit is that he kills half of the available victims. It's therefore perfectly reasonable to assume that Thor, Loki, Hulk, and Heimdall made a stand with the more combat capable survivors while Valkyrie and Korg and whomever else they want to bring back for Thor 4 (assuming that there IS a Thor 4 and that Thor survives Avengers 4) were left to defend the rest. (I'd say "women and children" but between Sif, Valkyrie, and Hela one can argue that female Asgardians are more dangerous than their male counterparts.) Either they escaped on the Grandmaster's Party Boat, or they're in the unblowed up half of the bigger ship. The whole sequence is kind of an example or where visual storytelling clashes with the exposited plot. We're told later that only half were killed but we're not really shown how Thanos spared the other half even in a rudimentary way -- even tho this would have been a good early opportunity to show his methodology. Were they sent off just before the opening in the Party Boat maybe? Were they sealed off in the unblown up part of the ship and left with enough provisions and fuel and workable ship to actually survive? If the latter is the case, why did they leave a bunch of their friends' corpses floating in space? It feels like hastily added "Poochie died on the way to his home planet" exposition because all we see is scattered corpses from the after math of a battle followed by a big explosion, followed by the guardians seeing space wreckage and floating bodies. It's the same with the "74 casualties in the Battle of New York" thing: a way to white-wash what we're shown happening to make it more friendly. But yeah, like I said, we will almost certainly find out that something else happened to Valkyrie assuming there is a Thor 4 and she signs on to come back, it's just a matter of, right now she's in Schrodinger's Cat limbo of being alive and dead until we're told what actually happened to her (assuming we ever are).
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May 20, 2018 20:30
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Lol they just didn’t want to pay cameo fees to korg and Valkyrie
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May 20, 2018 20:49
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Harime Nui posted:Vision is one of the most powerful Avengers and would be a moderately useful X-Man. He's Kitty Pryde with an exo-suit and laser pistol. More useful than Claw-Man, but less than Weather Witch, Mind Witch or German Bampher. I maintain that fights between mutants should be like Jojo Stand battles, with weird powers versus weird powers until someone wins by out-thinking or out-bullshitting the other.
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May 20, 2018 20:52
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