/r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > /r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

«‹›6020 »

Bamabalacha: Sep 18, 2006; Outta my way, ya dumb rah-rah!

Barudak posted:

Not having to pay alimony or child support

He�s also 35 (she�s 25) and they�ve been together for a decade :thermidor:

# ? Jun 15, 2018 13:46

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Jun 6, 2024 09:28

LadyPictureShow: Nov 18, 2005; Success!

Blade Runner posted:

Okay but what is the husband getting out of this then

Like their house is apparently an uncleaned disaster realm, she doesn't really seem to pay much attention to her kids beyond watching them screech, he makes all the money and apparently mostly bones other women, why does he bother staying

Her insane post history shows they�re into some real weird stuff, kink-wise. And they met when he was 26 and she was 16

And her second baby she says was due to forgetting her pills for several days while her daughter was/melting down/pissing everywhere/smearing feces on things.

# ? Jun 15, 2018 13:46

Bamabalacha: Sep 18, 2006; Outta my way, ya dumb rah-rah!

LadyPictureShow posted:

Her insane post history shows they�re into some real weird stuff, kink-wise. And they met when he was 26 and she was 16

And her second baby she says was due to forgetting her pills for several days while her daughter was/melting down/pissing everywhere/smearing feces on things.

She also got herpes having a three way with her husband and some rando.

And she busts out an �actually, it�s EPHEBOPHILIA� in a comment talking about her husband when they first started dating :gonk:

Bamabalacha fucked around with this message at 13:53 on Jun 15, 2018

# ? Jun 15, 2018 13:51

Barudak: May 7, 2007

Are we sure these people arent a feral group of cats?

# ? Jun 15, 2018 13:53

Absurd Alhazred: Mar 27, 2010; by Athanatos

Apparently :piss:

has manifested.

# ? Jun 15, 2018 13:54

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

Bamabalacha posted:

He�s also 35 (she�s 25) and they�ve been together for a decade

REALLY into dd/lg

# ? Jun 15, 2018 14:00

TheScott2K: Oct 26, 2003; I'm just saying, there's a nonzero chance Trump has a really toad penis.

I'm afraid to Bing what this dd/lg thing is

# ? Jun 15, 2018 14:01

Barudak: May 7, 2007

TheScott2K posted:

I'm afraid to Bing what this dd/lg thing is

With the power of Bing porn you should be downright terrified

# ? Jun 15, 2018 14:02

LadyPictureShow: Nov 18, 2005; Success!

TheScott2K posted:

I'm afraid to Bing what this dd/lg thing is

�Dom (dear?) daddy/little girl�. The documentary �Mommy Dead and Dearest� gives a brief explanation of what it is, since the killers were into that poo poo. Still more than I ever needed to know.

# ? Jun 15, 2018 14:03

Absurd Alhazred: Mar 27, 2010; by Athanatos

LadyPictureShow posted:

�Dom (dear?) daddy/little girl�. The documentary �Mommy Dead and Dearest� gives a brief explanation of what it is, since the killers were into that poo poo. Still more than I ever needed to know.

In this case it's more like deadbeat daddy/little girl

# ? Jun 15, 2018 14:05

Barudak: May 7, 2007

Typing that into Bing video would be like the part of 2001 a space Odyssey where he trips the void combined with apocalypse now mouthing the horror the horror

# ? Jun 15, 2018 14:06

La Brea Carpet: Nov 22, 2007; I have no mouth and I must post

Let us all cherish finding that rare combination of pathology that leaves a person constitutionally incapable of making a good decision.

# ? Jun 15, 2018 14:06

TheScott2K: Oct 26, 2003; I'm just saying, there's a nonzero chance Trump has a really toad penis.

Oh God

# ? Jun 15, 2018 14:07

Barudak: May 7, 2007

La Brea Carpet posted:

Let us all cherish finding that rare combination of pathology that leaves a person constitutionally incapable of making a good decision.

In the landmark decision, The United States vs. Agoraphobic Piss Queen

# ? Jun 15, 2018 14:08

Bamabalacha: Sep 18, 2006; Outta my way, ya dumb rah-rah!

Husband is also a convicted felon 👍🏻

who she met on MySpace.

# ? Jun 15, 2018 14:09

Runcible Cat: May 28, 2007; Ignoring this post

Bamabalacha posted:

Husband is also a convicted felon 👍🏻

who she met on MySpace.

Needs to be convicted some more IYAM.

# ? Jun 15, 2018 14:12

Buzkashi: Feb 4, 2003; College Slice

It's me, I am mr idiot internet exercise guy because when I saw autism pisslady's post entitled "5 year old destroying pullups" I was like gently caress yeah at least this lady's got a kid with strong lats

# ? Jun 15, 2018 14:13

Absurd Alhazred: Mar 27, 2010; by Athanatos

So they're together since they were 26/16, they play dd/lg, and the kid is pissing and making GBS threads all over. I feel like I have even more depressing speculations about that situation. :smithicide:

# ? Jun 15, 2018 14:17

Neophyte: Apr 23, 2006; perennially; Taco Defender

Ugh

, let's change the subject from gross sex and child horror stories to something more cheerful, like making fun of a 23 year-old who only knows 25 letters (he doesn't know the meaning of "ex")

My (23 M) friend (24 F) is making some questionable choices and I'd like to help her

quote:

So my friend is actually my most recent ex (as of April 13th, funny that was a Friday). She had smoked weed prior to me but then stops because of me. Then I move 1200 miles away for my first job out of college. She's still in school. She's apparently started smoking again and has anxiety and depression. Anxiety to where if she doesn't text back (even if I say "cool, have fun with your friends ") to mean I won't bother her she still messages back. This plays with my head to thinking she's okay texting too.

Other thing is I'm a bit worried about some of these new friends in that they're more drinking friends and pot buddies than anything. And I wanted to make sure she's not just sleeping with whoever will give it to her and possibly pretending to be into her to get it.

Not once while with her was she high or full drunk then hungover (I don't touch weed with a 10ft pole and don't drink enough to get hungover in over a year).

She's a bit of a hippie (her words) and an art education major. I still care for her as a friend and don't want to see her go down the wrong road.

While with her she was also very weird about me being friends with girls even though I wasn't seeing them romantically. She clicks better with guys yet I don't care one bit of she hangs out with them so long as I don't think they'll take advantage of her.

I do care for her and I know it's wrong to be a "helicopter friend" but I'm just thinking some of these choices shouldn't mix with her.

She already has a rough family dynamic as they don't listen to her (basically refused to accept she was assulted in high school) and since then have ignored her for the most part. So I can see where someone gets the feelings and care from drugs and friends but that shouldn't be necessary.

I want to help her but also don't want to piss her off. A part of me is shocked she smokes because I held her to higher standards (family is well off too) and that doesn't vibe with someone who has everything going for them.

**TL;DR** friend is making some questionable choices and I want to help her without pissing her off

"An adult is making decisions I don't approve of! How can I make her stop?!?"

And, uh, he's getting some weird coworker advice on dating too

quote:

Heck, I met her on bumble during my final semester at school. I've used the apps and enjoy my local NC beers (Charlotte is a great beer town).

I guess from my distant view it seemed like that's all she was doing with them.

2 people at work said I need a new girlfriend Co-worker#1 said an Indian girl since they like to make homemade food I could take to work but I'm not into that idea
2 said a country/southern girl (co-worker could my grandma and is southern traditional). So long as they're not backwoods I can get along (I like some intelligence). [his bolding]

Oh of course he's in North Carolina. :banjo:

# ? Jun 15, 2018 14:22

hawowanlawow: Jul 27, 2009

/r/relationships: (I like some intelligence)

# ? Jun 15, 2018 14:24

LadyPictureShow: Nov 18, 2005; Success!

Absurd Alhazred posted:

So they're together since they were 26/16, they play dd/lg, and the kid is pissing and making GBS threads all over. I feel like I have even more depressing speculations about that situation.

Her SO was molested by his father as a child, her dad was an addict and her mother seems like she wanted nothing to do with her.

Food issues!

quote:

BUT, sensory issues can't be ruled out either. I have SPD and I am 25. I throw up most veggies because of the sound they make in between my teeth (that crisp crunch most people love? feels like nails on a chalkboard to me) So, the only way I can eat veggies is when they are cooked and even then... I can't eat onions, peppers or any leafy greens.

quote:

when I was little, I would only eat fish sticks- and yes, I starved myself because my parents "didnt give in" resulting in lifelong problems with me and food. After my parents decided that this whole sticking to your guns thing wasnt working anymore (after about 6 months, the only meal i'd eat was breakfast, scambled eggs and toast) I lived off of fish sticks for 3 years.... and I was happy about it and my mother taught me how to use the toaster oven and I figured out how to make it on my own at 5 years old....

when I was a teen i'd literally only eat chicken patties, so.... there was this ever occuring thing with me- food obession and sameness.... I was diagnosed with autism late at 15 years old.... this was the reason for the problems with food.

(I still prefer fish sticks and chicken patties 9 times out of 10. & im 25 years old) I don't fight with my daughter about food, I offer options.... but she also has autism so, I know how lovely it feels to be starved because "something doesnt feel right" and not be able to explain it

Why can�t I stop investigating this dumpster fire of existence?!

# ? Jun 15, 2018 14:24

Caganer: Feb 15, 2018

Bamabalacha posted:

Husband is also a convicted felon 👍🏻

who she met on MySpace.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fkcqu4UGqSQ&t=10s

Absurd Alhazred posted:

So they're together since they were 26/16, they play dd/lg, and the kid is pissing and making GBS threads all over. I feel like I have even more depressing speculations about that situation.

for those who have not worked in a mandatory reporter position:

:smith:

kids who are sexually abused will often not shower, piss on themselves, etc to avoid abuse, it's a huge :redflag:

Neophyte posted:

Ugh , let's change the subject from gross sex and child horror stories to something more cheerful, like making fun of a 23 year-old who only knows 25 letters (he doesn't know the meaning of "ex")

My (23 M) friend (24 F) is making some questionable choices and I'd like to help her

"An adult is making decisions I don't approve of! How can I make her stop?!?"

And, uh, he's getting some weird coworker advice on dating too

Oh of course he's in North Carolina.

someone who's been raped choosing to smoke weed to self medicate is not a "questionable choice", it's pretty sound harm reduction. i guess OP would prefer she blast her brain + get diabetes from drinking herself to sleep like a good southern gal

# ? Jun 15, 2018 14:25

Bamabalacha: Sep 18, 2006; Outta my way, ya dumb rah-rah!

LadyPictureShow posted:

Her SO was molested by his father as a child, her dad was an addict and her mother seems like she wanted nothing to do with her.

Food issues!

Why can�t I stop investigating this dumpster fire of existence?!

And those are her biological parents, she was adopted when she was 3, her mother sounds like a piece of work and she blindly idolizes her late father.

She also had BPD and is autistic, to the surprise of no one.

And Caganer, I�m pretty sure the pissing and making GBS threads is because the daughter is severally autistic. At least I hope that�s the reason :smith:

Bamabalacha fucked around with this message at 14:33 on Jun 15, 2018

# ? Jun 15, 2018 14:31

Caganer: Feb 15, 2018

Bamabalacha posted:

And those are her biological parents, she was adopted when she was 3, her mother sounds like a piece of work and she blindly idolizes her late father.

She also had BPD and is autistic, to the surprise of no one.

And Caganer, I�m pretty sure the pissing and making GBS threads is because the daughter is severally autistic. At least I hope that�s the reason

i mean, her SO was molested as a kid, and while not all abuse victims also abuse it's a trend. that + the other stuff would have triggered me to report my concerns to CPS and i would have followed up with a call to one of the social workers i had a relationship with to prod them a bit because that's a massive set of red flags.

# ? Jun 15, 2018 14:35

La Brea Carpet: Nov 22, 2007; I have no mouth and I must post

Caganer posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fkcqu4UGqSQ&t=10s

for those who have not worked in a mandatory reporter position:

kids who are sexually abused will often not shower, piss on themselves, etc to avoid abuse, it's a huge

She says that the daughter is severely autistic which may be why she's pissing all over. This does not exclude the above though.

# ? Jun 15, 2018 14:40

Blade Runner: Aug 14, 2015

I honestly want to see how things can get worse here

Like what's gonna top it, they already opened the relationship, they live in filth, she literally cannot leave the house

Is she going to leave him for someone she meets on WoW or what

# ? Jun 15, 2018 14:47

LadyPictureShow: Nov 18, 2005; Success!

Well, she believes in astrology. Pack it up friends, this vein�s tapped out.

Moving on... silly high school worries!

I(M18) am not sure how to keep in contact with friends after High School (F18,M18)

quote:

So, I am about to graduate high school and I am not sure how to keep up with two specially close friends of mine. I Really don't want to stop talking to them as they have helped me get out of very bad situation i was in.

But again I really don't quite know how to do that as we are all going to take pretty different paths. I have always been bad at keeping up with people and I know it sounds silly, just don't know what to message them about. Probably I am just being paranoid as always but the are pretty dear friends and I really don't want to just suddenly lose complete contact. and yes i am aware we are almost guaranteed to drift apart a little but I want to avoid completely losing a relationship so valuable to me.

PS: I know how silly this sounds but I really suck at this kind of things.

TL;DR: Graduating High School, don't want to lose contact with close friends of mine.

Imagine this kid before FB and smartphones...

# ? Jun 15, 2018 14:48

Barudak: May 7, 2007

LadyPictureShow posted:

I(M18) am not sure how to keep in contact with friends after High School (F18,M18)

Imagine this kid before FB and smartphones...

Dont worry about it, youll be so different from them after college youll cringe when you remember them.

# ? Jun 15, 2018 15:00

Caganer: Feb 15, 2018

La Brea Carpet posted:

She says that the daughter is severely autistic which may be why she's pissing all over. This does not exclude the above though.

yeah, i worked with autistic kids and this sounds more severe than just run of the mill 'tism.

Blade Runner posted:

I honestly want to see how things can get worse here

Like what's gonna top it, they already opened the relationship, they live in filth, she literally cannot leave the house

Is she going to leave him for someone she meets on WoW or what

she overcomes here agoraphobia to assault one of the neighborhood kids for staring at her

# ? Jun 15, 2018 15:22

TheKennedys: Sep 23, 2006; By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet

Ugh, I think I'm gonna come back to this thread in five pages or so once pisshouse has faded into hivemind memory, my daughter has high-functioning ASD and my mother was a multiply-impaired special ed teacher for my whole life; it's been a lifelong terror of mine for one of my kids to end up like that poor girl.

You have to be a goddamn saint to be able to handle kids like that or you will burn out within a year. Mama lasted thirty-five before she retired out of frustration with the decline of mental health services and budget for schools. This lady has already lost her mind and honestly I can't say I wouldn't too.

# ? Jun 15, 2018 15:52

LadyPictureShow: Nov 18, 2005; Success!

I�mma make it up to you all!

Is it unfair of my (25f) boyfriend (27m) to not let me cocktail waitress at a strip club?

quote:

I'm a college student with some extra time during the summer semester & I'd like to make some money. I work 1 day a week at a law firm, but can't pick up more hours there, and I've applied for other law firms but no one has gotten back to me yet (and probably won't as most require a degree; I got exceptionally lucky with my current job). I outright refuse to work for close to minimum wage; my time is too valuable.

I received a call back from a strip club for the position of cocktail waitress. The add said you could make $150-400 per night. Not sure exactly how true that is, but I'd like to give it a shot and find out.

I know there's this saying that the difference between a cocktail waitress and a stripper is "two weeks". But, I have a year left on my bachelor's degree and a solid career choice in mind. I'm also shy and can't dance. The idea of getting naked in front of stranger's is beyond horrifying to me. So, there's a bigger chance of an asteroid hitting the White House than there is of me ever becoming a stripper.

There is security and they can walk me to my car, so there's no safety issue. I'm also not an idiot, I'm not going to run into the parking lot alone after a customer if they forgot their card. I'm also not going to leave him for a guy that goes to strip clubs, that is a huge turn off for me.

The only real issue I can think of is my history of drug use. I did have a problem with a particular drug, which I haven't used in 4 years, and have no desire to ever use again. I was in a dark place back then, and now my life is pretty spectacular. I know for a fact the low isn't worth the high, and I have 0 desire to get high ever again. I also had a problem with a prescription drug, but I've had that under control for about 2 years or so now, with only 1 real slip up in the past 6 months. That one is harder for me because I still need to use it to fly, which we do kind of often. But the slip up was related to school stress, and my semester is much calmer during the summer's.

I totally get that his concern is valid. Especially when it comes to the drug issue. I get it. But, I know myself. I know that there won't be an issue of temptation for me. I know, beyond an inkling of a doubt, that I will NOT get into drugs from working at a strip club, as contradictory as that sounds. I can see it and not get a craving. If anything, seeing it will just make me sick. I just want to work a few days a week and make some money over the summer. Get in, flirt with gross old men, give them their drinks, and walk out with money.

I know he can obviously break up with me for any reason, it doesn't have to be a good one. But, would this be a good reason? I'm not saying I'm going to do it regardless. If he says no firmly then I'm not going to do it. But I just want to know if him saying no is reasonable.

tl;dr: Is it reasonable for my boyfriend to not let me cocktail waitress at a strip club?

�I don�t have a degree, but my time is too valuable to work for minimum wage!�

# ? Jun 15, 2018 16:11

TheScott2K: Oct 26, 2003; I'm just saying, there's a nonzero chance Trump has a really toad penis.

LadyPictureShow posted:

I’mma make it up to you all!

Is it unfair of my (25f) boyfriend (27m) to not let me cocktail waitress at a strip club?

‘I don’t have a degree, but my time is too valuable to work for minimum wage!’

Everyone's time is more valuable than our current minimum wage.

# ? Jun 15, 2018 16:16

La Brea Carpet: Nov 22, 2007; I have no mouth and I must post

LadyPictureShow posted:

I’mma make it up to you all!

Is it unfair of my (25f) boyfriend (27m) to not let me cocktail waitress at a strip club?

‘I don’t have a degree, but my time is too valuable to work for minimum wage!’

Double Ds get degrees? Is that the saying?

# ? Jun 15, 2018 16:16

Anne Whateley: Feb 11, 2007; i like nice words

"I don't have a degree" isn't really a strike against you when you're a current college student. The drug stuff is a red flag (and was when it was posted a little while ago), wanting a job that pays well is not.

# ? Jun 15, 2018 16:17

Nightgull: Jan 22, 2018; TOTALLY NOT A CONSERVATIVE
or a fucking nazi

Caganer posted:

i mean, her SO was molested as a kid, and while not all abuse victims also abuse it's a trend. that + the other stuff would have triggered me to report my concerns to CPS and i would have followed up with a call to one of the social workers i had a relationship with to prod them a bit because that's a massive set of red flags.

Eh. That�s extremely typical behavior for a child with severe autism, and like I said before if the kid is using PECS at school to communicate then she definitely is severely handicapped and probably non verbal. This isn�t to dismiss possible abuse, because who knows, but if her child was male it would describe something like 30-40% of my clients, some coming from almost that exact same background.

# ? Jun 15, 2018 16:18

Blade Runner: Aug 14, 2015

She is going to end up doing drugs and then she is going to end up being a stripper, to get more drugs

He is either going to leave her then or when she cheats on him, but these things are inevitabilities

# ? Jun 15, 2018 16:23

Rubellavator: Aug 16, 2007

LadyPictureShow posted:

I’mma make it up to you all!

Is it unfair of my (25f) boyfriend (27m) to not let me cocktail waitress at a strip club?

‘I don’t have a degree, but my time is too valuable to work for minimum wage!’

I don't know what you're making up for but this was posted months ago and I'm ashamed I know that.

# ? Jun 15, 2018 16:24

LadyPictureShow: Nov 18, 2005; Success!

Anne Whateley posted:

"I don't have a degree" isn't really a strike against you when you're a current college student. The drug stuff is a red flag (and was when it was posted a little while ago), wanting a job that pays well is not.

Yeah the drug use is a bigger red flag, but at least when I was in college, most of the people I knew just picked up gigs where they were fine with you working for only a few months. I worked a whole bunch of restaurant jobs.

# ? Jun 15, 2018 16:25

dudeness: Mar 5, 2010; Cat Army; Fallen Rib

Is there a male equivalent of this job? Asking for a friend.

# ? Jun 15, 2018 16:26

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Jun 6, 2024 09:28

La Brea Carpet: Nov 22, 2007; I have no mouth and I must post

dudeness posted:

Is there a male equivalent of this job? Asking for a friend.

Sorry the Moose Knuckle bar and grill isn't hiring right now.

# ? Jun 15, 2018 16:31

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > /r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

«‹›6020 »