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Varg
Jan 13, 2007

A friendly face.

couple new Chthe'ilist songs https://profoundlorerecords.bandcamp.com/album/passage-into-the-xexanotth

I still can't ever type their name right without copy+paste

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skasion
Feb 13, 2012

Why don't you perform zazen, facing a wall?

Bertrand Hustle posted:

How the gently caress do you pronounce this band's name?

Rhymes with nihilist

Zodijackylite
Oct 18, 2005

hello bonjour, en francais we call the bread man l'homme de pain, because pain means bread and we're going to see a lot of pain this year and every nyrfan is looking forward to it and hey tony, can you wait until after my postgame interview to get on your phone? i thought you quit twitter...

TeamJesus posted:

I just remembered that the otherwise mediocre death metal band Abacinate made 2 awesome songs devoted to the Canadian show Are You Afraid of the Dark? and it's theme music.

Did you know that you can watch episodes of Are You Afraid of the Dark on archive.org?

Kilometers Davis
Jul 9, 2007

They begin again

Ctheillest (no even trying, gently caress you awesome band) owns and everyone should listen to them.

Snowy
Oct 6, 2010

A man whose blood
Is very snow-broth;
One who never feels
The wanton stings and
Motions of the sense



It’s pronounced Cthulhu the illest.

velvet milkman
Feb 13, 2012

by R. Guyovich

lmao, for those of you who didn't click this, the track is very stupidly named "the infinite mirror of millennial narcissism". Love when my metal is inspired by trash tier clickbait op-eds

KingKapalone
Dec 20, 2005
1/16 Native American + 1/2 Hungarian = Totally Badass
Need advice on European metal festivals for summer 2019 and which would be the best/ones to consider based on these criteria/requests:

- Three of us would be coming with our ladies that have no interest in metal so they would be doing their own thing in the area. This would probably require the festival to be close enough to a city with stuff to do for three days. This would be the main criteria to see if this is even possible.
- Main interest is melodic death, death, prog, and black. I know there are some festivals like Download that always have Korn and Limp Bizkit as headliners, so this would hopefully rule those out.
- Would prefer big open air
- I know there are some in March/April, but I think the summer would be required

The Muppets On PCP
Nov 13, 2016

by Fluffdaddy

Varg posted:

couple new Chthe'ilist songs https://profoundlorerecords.bandcamp.com/album/passage-into-the-xexanotth

I still can't ever type their name right without copy+paste

disappointed it's not another song about legend of zelda

Kvlt!
May 19, 2012



the most obnoxious band name in metal was this band whose name was just a rectangle, not "a rectangle" but a literal tiny filled in rectangle. How the hell do you pronounce that

xzzy
Mar 5, 2009

Discontent with traditional illegible band logos, local death metal band seeks to make themselves completely inaddressible by selecting letter combinations that no human can pronounce.

Nordick
Sep 3, 2011

Yes.

KozmoNaut posted:

I'm digging the new Hoth album. It is very good.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nkZaAwCfdSc

Hey yo this is good poo poo.

venus de lmao
Apr 30, 2007

Call me "pixeltits"

Kvlt! posted:

the most obnoxious band name in metal was this band whose name was just a rectangle, not "a rectangle" but a literal tiny filled in rectangle. How the hell do you pronounce that

I would just call the band "a rectangle"

Varg
Jan 13, 2007

A friendly face.

Kvlt! posted:

the most obnoxious band name in metal

Eximperituserqethhzebibšiptugakkathšulweliarzaxułum

KozmoNaut
Apr 23, 2008

Happiness is a warm
Turbo Plasma Rifle


KingKapalone posted:

Need advice on European metal festivals for summer 2019 and which would be the best/ones to consider based on these criteria/requests:

- Three of us would be coming with our ladies that have no interest in metal so they would be doing their own thing in the area. This would probably require the festival to be close enough to a city with stuff to do for three days. This would be the main criteria to see if this is even possible.
- Main interest is melodic death, death, prog, and black. I know there are some festivals like Download that always have Korn and Limp Bizkit as headliners, so this would hopefully rule those out.
- Would prefer big open air
- I know there are some in March/April, but I think the summer would be required

Since I live in Copenhagen, I have to recommend Copenhell, which is next week, and always around the mid-June. It's ~15-20 minutes by public transport from the city center, and you've got Malmö right across Øresund as well. Plenty of stuff to do, great restaurants and shopping in both cities.

This is the lineup for this year: https://static1.squarespace.com/static/57e38590d1758e2877decf66/t/5aeff4aaaa4a9960d85166fb/1525675178314/COPENHELL+2018.pdf

As it is the biggest metal festival in the country, and with the widest audience, it also has a more "friendly" lineup usually. You're not going to find the meanest death/black bands here, and there's some *core as well. But it's always a nice mix of everything. The last couple of years they've branched out more from "safe" bands, and made some slightly off-beat bookings. This year it's Igorrr, Zeal & Ardor and Natjager (Danish heavily autotuned metal, I'm not a fan), but you've also got solid stuff like Kreator, At the Gates, Tsjuder and Suffocation. Attendance is around 23K people.

Another solid as hell festival is Royal Metal Fest in Aarhus. It's a much smaller festival, 2 days and less than 1000 guests, and usually held around Easter. They generally have more of a focus on death and black, 2017 had one hell of a killer lineup, with Immolation, Vader, Fleshgod Apocalypse, Havok, Warbringer, Exmortus, Benighted, Gorod and a solid lineup of local bands as well. This year it was Bloodbath, Ensiferum, Origin, Allegaeon, Ne Obliviscaris, Hideous Divinity, Ex Deo and the usual selection of local bands. Aarhus is also an extremely nice city to visit, so you're covered there as the festival is held literally in the centre of the city. It's not a big open air thing, though.

As I've only ever been to festivals here in Denmark and not internationally, I can only personally recommend Danish festivals. We have a bunch more than those two, but they're held in much smaller and boring-rear end towns with nothing else going on. Those are the fests I have experience with.

For the big festivals, Wacken is the obvious and default recommendation. It is the European metal festival for a reason, but there isn't really much in the way of big cities nearby. I'm in talks with some friends about going to Brutal Assault in the Czech Republic later this summer. They always have a killer lineup, and cheap-as-gently caress beer.

There's also Hellfest in France, which is huge and has Nantes nearby, for city stuff.

KozmoNaut fucked around with this message at 17:24 on Jun 15, 2018

KingKapalone
Dec 20, 2005
1/16 Native American + 1/2 Hungarian = Totally Badass

KozmoNaut posted:

Since I live in Copenhagen, I have to recommend Copenhell, which is next week, and always around the mid-June. It's ~15-20 minutes by public transport from the city center, and you've got Malmö right across Øresund as well. Plenty of stuff to do, great restaurants and shopping in both cities.

This is the lineup for this year: https://static1.squarespace.com/static/57e38590d1758e2877decf66/t/5aeff4aaaa4a9960d85166fb/1525675178314/COPENHELL+2018.pdf

As it is the biggest metal festival in the country, and with the widest audience, it also has a more "friendly" lineup usually. You're not going to find the meanest death/black bands here, and there's some *core as well. But it's always a nice mix of everything. The last couple of years they've branched out more from "safe" bands, and made some slightly off-beat bookings. This year it's Igorrr, Zeal & Ardor and Natjager (Danish heavily autotuned metal, I'm not a fan), but you've also got solid stuff like Kreator, At the Gates, Tsjuder and Suffocation. Attendance is around 23K people.

Another solid as hell festival is Royal Metal Fest in Aarhus. It's a much smaller festival, 2 days and less than 1000 guests, and usually held around Easter. They generally have more of a focus on death and black, 2017 had one hell of a killer lineup, with Immolation, Vader, Fleshgod Apocalypse, Havok, Warbringer, Exmortus, Benighted, Gorod and a solid lineup of local bands as well. This year it was Bloodbath, Ensiferum, Origin, Allegaeon, Ne Obliviscaris, Hideous Divinity, Ex Deo and the usual selection of local bands. Aarhus is also an extremely nice city to visit, so you're covered there as the festival is held literally in the centre of the city. It's not a big open air thing, though.

As I've only ever been to festivals here in Denmark and not internationally, I can only personally recommend Danish festivals. We have a bunch more than those two, but they're held in much smaller and boring-rear end towns with nothing else going on. Those are the fests I have experience with.

For the big festivals, Wacken is the obvious and default recommendation. It is the European metal festival for a reason, but there isn't really much in the way of big cities nearby. I'm in talks with some friends about going to Brutal Assault in the Czech Republic later this summer. They always have a killer lineup, and cheap-as-gently caress beer.

There's also Hellfest in France, which is huge and has Nantes nearby, for city stuff.

Copenhell has the location but that lineup doesn't exactly look to be worth the trip, at least this year's. Royal Metal has the lineup but don't think the timing works (my friend is finishing his residency in the summer). Wacken doesn't seem like the location works. This is tough. Hellfest could be good but I was in France last year.

Kvlt!
May 19, 2012




There's a band i saw on metal archives called :nsfw: Intracerebrally Consuming Cephalalgia Through The Cranium Macerating Debrisfucked Manure Ingested Remains Of The Mindfucked Cataplexic Wicked Mankind Whom Fistfucked The Progenies From The Deepest Depths Of The Analmaggot Raped Human Pieces Of Erotic Shitmasses Which Gave Birth To Worthless Eunuchs As Travesty For Cumstained Whorefaced Sluts Enslaved By This Stupid Society Full Of Fetal Garbages :nsfw:

KozmoNaut
Apr 23, 2008

Happiness is a warm
Turbo Plasma Rifle


KingKapalone posted:

Copenhell has the location but that lineup doesn't exactly look to be worth the trip, at least this year's. Royal Metal has the lineup but don't think the timing works (my friend is finishing his residency in the summer). Wacken doesn't seem like the location works. This is tough. Hellfest could be good but I was in France last year.

It's just and OK lineup, yeah I wouldn't travel far to see it. They never have more than one or two black metal bands on, and the same for heavier death metal. Usually a decent amount of thrash.

Other decent festivals include Sweden Rock (obviously not a primarily metal festival), Graspop in Belgium, and I've heard good things about Summerbreeze in southern Germany, but it's in the middle of loving nowhere. There's Tuska in Finland but uhh... Finland :emo:

Bloodstock, maybe? I've heard mixed things about it, mostly good.

Full Collapse
Dec 4, 2002

Kvlt! posted:

There's a band i saw on metal archives called :nsfw: Intracerebrally Consuming Cephalalgia Through The Cranium Macerating Debrisfucked Manure Ingested Remains Of The Mindfucked Cataplexic Wicked Mankind Whom Fistfucked The Progenies From The Deepest Depths Of The Analmaggot Raped Human Pieces Of Erotic Shitmasses Which Gave Birth To Worthless Eunuchs As Travesty For Cumstained Whorefaced Sluts Enslaved By This Stupid Society Full Of Fetal Garbages :nsfw:

At least they've narrowed down their focus?

venus de lmao
Apr 30, 2007

Call me "pixeltits"

Kvlt! posted:

There's a band i saw on metal archives called :nsfw: Intracerebrally Consuming Cephalalgia Through The Cranium Macerating Debrisfucked Manure Ingested Remains Of The Mindfucked Cataplexic Wicked Mankind Whom Fistfucked The Progenies From The Deepest Depths Of The Analmaggot Raped Human Pieces Of Erotic Shitmasses Which Gave Birth To Worthless Eunuchs As Travesty For Cumstained Whorefaced Sluts Enslaved By This Stupid Society Full Of Fetal Garbages :nsfw:

The best part of this is they misused "whom" in an attempt to make their pretentious-rear end name sound smart.

The Muppets On PCP
Nov 13, 2016

by Fluffdaddy

Bertrand Hustle posted:

The best part of this is they misused "whom" in an attempt to make their pretentious-rear end name sound smart.

maybe english isn't their first language

Monstaland
Sep 23, 2003

Wacken is pretty cool for those people not really into metal actually, lot's of stuff going on like medieval shows and all kind of comedy and folk acts and whatnot. At the same time it's also what attracts a lot of party tourists who never have heard of Judas Priest which is a downside to a lot of people. I've met people up there who just stay at the camping site for 4 days and barely see a show.

I've never been there but I think Metal Days in Slovenia might be up your alley. It's located on an a nice island if i am correct and the shows start rather late in the day (about 3 o clock so you can chill at the beach and swim in the water). Me, I am going to Hellfest in a couple of days. First time but that's sold out ages ago so no use recommending that.

Also, who cares about a headliner you don't like? These big festivals have over hundreds of bands and several headliners. You will not be able to see even a third of the bill.

Fenrir
Apr 26, 2005

I found my kendo stick, bitch!

Lipstick Apathy
Wacken is awesome, and yeah, there is a LOT to do even if you aren't a big metal fan. My first time I went in trying so hard to catch all the bands I wanted to see that I got stressed out, tired as gently caress by night 2 and missed out on the other fun poo poo. I didn't make that mistake again. It's better to prioritize a handful of must-see acts and let the rest of the trip just happen. Listening to loud rear end metal is great but so is meeting people from all over the world.

Gorewar
Dec 24, 2004

Bang your head

The Muppets On PCP posted:

too evil for ya, eh? :v:

semi-related but one of the sillier of those dumb people reacting to entry-level metal youtube channels that have sprouted up like herpes is this married couple, presumably evangelicals, who read way, way too much into stuff and try to shoehorn what they think the bible says into lyrics. they were really turned off by ghost because they thought they might be actual satanists

the best one is when they took that one nile song about isis destroying monuments at face value convinced they were legit jihadists

Lost in Vegas is generally a pretty entertaining watch despite the guys not liking anything heavy, but literally all of the other channels in that genre of youtube are so dumb.

A human heart
Oct 10, 2012

Bertrand Hustle posted:

e: The new Varathron is SO loving GOOD.

I thought the last one was really dull, is the new one closer to their old material?

Dimebags Brain
Feb 18, 2013





Sear Bliss uploaded their new album for streaming today. If you're into atmospheric black metal that doesn't really sound like anyone else and also trombones, give it a listen! They're one of my favorite bands, and this is their first release in 6 years. Real loving good.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pRSJWUrNmWY

KozmoNaut
Apr 23, 2008

Happiness is a warm
Turbo Plasma Rifle


Nordick posted:

Hey yo this is good poo poo.

I can't stop listening to it.

Straight up Windir worship in the opening track, ridiculously epic vocals on Journey into the Eternal Winter, old-school Amon Amarth vibe on Citadel of the Necromancer, galloping rhythms on The Living Dreams of a Dead God and The Gathering of the Accursed Artifacts.

I just can't stop finding cool poo poo in this album.

(Also, they're called Hoth and their logo looks like a Tie Fighter)

Oldstench
Jun 29, 2007

Let's talk about where you're going.

KozmoNaut posted:

(Also, they're called Hoth and their logo looks like a Tie Fighter)

That should be a red flag.

Shugojin
Sep 6, 2007

THE TAIL THAT BURNS TWICE AS BRIGHT...


KozmoNaut posted:

(Also, they're called Hoth and their logo looks like a Tie Fighter)

Hear that? That's the sound of Disney lawyers mobilizing.

KozmoNaut
Apr 23, 2008

Happiness is a warm
Turbo Plasma Rifle


Oldstench posted:

That should be a red flag.

I've spent my life ignoring red flags, why stop now

Give them a listen.

Shugojin posted:

Hear that? That's the sound of Disney lawyers mobilizing.

They've been doing it since 2011 with no issues.

If anything, Disney would be going after Galactic Empire first, those guys are pretty blatant, and they play actual Star Wars music.

KozmoNaut fucked around with this message at 16:52 on Jun 16, 2018

Cardiac
Aug 28, 2012

KozmoNaut posted:

Since I live in Copenhagen, I have to recommend Copenhell, which is next week, and always around the mid-June. It's ~15-20 minutes by public transport from the city center, and you've got Malmö right across Øresund as well. Plenty of stuff to do, great restaurants and shopping in both cities.

This is the lineup for this year: https://static1.squarespace.com/static/57e38590d1758e2877decf66/t/5aeff4aaaa4a9960d85166fb/1525675178314/COPENHELL+2018.pdf

They are not expecting that many Swedes to attend judging from the date?
On 2 of those days, Sweden is a dead place and not really an object for touristing.
As for Sweden rock, wasn’t that sold out for like 1-2 months prior to the festival.

KozmoNaut
Apr 23, 2008

Happiness is a warm
Turbo Plasma Rifle


Any festival is going to clash with something. There's a big swedish style cray feast, so I think they're expecting some swedes.

Isn't there also a swedish festival around the same time that got cancelled? I bet a lot of swedes are going to Copenhell instead.

Kilometers Davis
Jul 9, 2007

They begin again

I was looking up that Hoth band and found the wrong one. Portuguese black metal with a big titty + skull cover. Maybe that’s the right one actually.

Smirr
Jun 28, 2012

Kilometers Davis posted:

I was looking up that Hoth band and found the wrong one. Portuguese black metal with a big titty + skull cover. Maybe that’s the right one actually.

I didn't think I had an opinion on this, but one man bands with tit covers are weird imo. Especially if it's 3 out of 4 covers

Snowy
Oct 6, 2010

A man whose blood
Is very snow-broth;
One who never feels
The wanton stings and
Motions of the sense



Smirr posted:

I didn't think I had an opinion on this, but one man bands with tit covers are weird imo. Especially if it's 3 out of 4 covers

Maybe he’s got a good tit connection

A human heart
Oct 10, 2012

KozmoNaut posted:

I've spent my life ignoring red flags, why stop now

Give them a listen.

I did, and surprise, it sounds like bad melodeath.

Smirr posted:

I didn't think I had an opinion on this, but one man bands with tit covers are weird imo. Especially if it's 3 out of 4 covers

Power From Hell is cool because all of his album covers are bondage ladies, and the songs are also about bondage ladies

venus de lmao
Apr 30, 2007

Call me "pixeltits"

Bondage and ladies are both cool and good.

Kilometers Davis
Jul 9, 2007

They begin again

Those sounds p cool yeah

Cardiac
Aug 28, 2012

KozmoNaut posted:

Any festival is going to clash with something. There's a big swedish style cray feast, so I think they're expecting some swedes.

You Danes are in my experience quite bad in realizing how big midsummer is in Sweden and which date it is. Your St Hans is really not close to it.
That said, if I had nothing better to do on Midsummer (and were like 10 years younger) getting hilariously drunk on a metal festival sounds like a good idea.

Smirr
Jun 28, 2012

A human heart posted:

Power From Hell is cool because all of his album covers are bondage ladies, and the songs are also about bondage ladies

They have some excellent lyrics:

I hear voices calling for the destruction sound
I see souls thirsting for heavy metal
Women crazy, want to show her breast
The old ritual is weak but not dead

I sill see fists raised
I still see the horns with his fingers
That noises is disturbing my guitar
The metal is sick but never die

Tonight the power from hell will play in the whorehouse
Orgies, alcohol, the show will be special
Every riff played, a bitch is horny
That sound will make you think just gently caress

Metal crossed decades of battles and fights
Recruiting soldiers willing to die
loving bitches and getting drunk on the floor
This song represents the very evil

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Wark Say
Feb 22, 2013

by Fluffdaddy

Cardiac posted:

You Danes are in my experience quite bad in realizing how big midsummer is in Sweden and which date it is. Your St Hans is really not close to it.
That said, if I had nothing better to do on Midsummer (and were like 10 years younger) getting hilariously drunk on a metal festival sounds like a good idea.
Getting hilariously drunk at a metal festival is a good idea and a good time. All you need to do is take precautions so your rear end can handle the morning after, and that's relatively easy to do. :colbert:

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