Alt-Right: HA-HA-HA-HAGHOOCH

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > C-SPAM > Alt-Right: HA-HA-HA-HAGHOOCH

Phobophilia: Apr 26, 2008; by Hand Knit

ive been saying it for a while, america is going to steadily revoke citizenship to peripheral regions as ecological catastrophes mount, puerto rico is an obvious first

anyone who cant afford to move out of florida is also up

# ? Jul 11, 2018 09:13

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# ? May 29, 2024 16:40

Skellybones: May 31, 2011; Fun Shoe

Florida is where all the wealthy and aspirationally wealthy white people go to die, they'll never give it up.

# ? Jul 11, 2018 10:03

rudatron: May 31, 2011; by Fluffdaddy

well it'll certainly be an easier place to die when its flooded.

# ? Jul 11, 2018 10:21

Alan Smithee: Jan 4, 2005; A man becomes preeminent, he's expected to have enthusiasms.

Enthusiasms, enthusiasms...

Skellybones posted:

Florida is where all the wealthy and aspirationally wealthy white people go to die, they'll never give it up.

remove ~~kebab~~ Florida

# ? Jul 11, 2018 10:23

Phobophilia: Apr 26, 2008; by Hand Knit

if you were rich enough to retire to florida, you�re rich enough to evacuate

# ? Jul 11, 2018 10:29

Reclines Obesily: Jul 24, 2000; Hey Moona!; Slippery Tilde

elon musk will save them, he'll save us all

# ? Jul 11, 2018 10:30

cargo cult: Aug 28, 2008; by Reene

A Gnarlacious Bro posted:

My favorite is this:

drat dude insanely badass for the epic win

# ? Jul 11, 2018 10:39

Alan Smithee: Jan 4, 2005; A man becomes preeminent, he's expected to have enthusiasms.

Enthusiasms, enthusiasms...

Reclines Obesily posted:

elon musk will save them, he'll save us all

he really really shoudlnt'

# ? Jul 11, 2018 10:39

codenameFANGIO: May 4, 2012; What are you even booing here?

cargo cult posted:

drat dude insanely badass for the epic win

this but I mean it

# ? Jul 11, 2018 10:52

Dmitri-9: Nov 30, 2004; There's something really sexy about Scrooge McDuck. I love Uncle Scrooge.

The Juice is loose.

https://twitter.com/daviddebolt/status/1016837940889055232

# ? Jul 11, 2018 12:22

Bushiz: Sep 21, 2004; The #1 Threat to Ba Sing Se; Grimey Drawer

Skellybones posted:

Florida is where all the wealthy and aspirationally wealthy white people go to die, they'll never give it up.

the costs of geoengineering florida to survive global warming will be seen as greater than the costs of invading cancun so the rich people have a new place to rot away

# ? Jul 11, 2018 13:47

FMguru: Sep 10, 2003; peed on;
sexually

Dapper_Swindler posted:

if trump lovely awfulness starts burning the economy down. it might break the GOP apart more, at least the corporate wing.

Eh, the last Republican president just about set the entire global economy on fire in 2008, and roughly 15 minutes after his Democratic successor was elected to deal with it, the GOP and all wings of the conservative movement were as unified as they had ever been in opposition to him.

The moment the Democrats get even a sniff of power after Trump, whatever tension exists between the corporate/theocratic/nativist wings will disappear and be replaced with unified maximum obstruction (probably with a Tea Party 2.0)

# ? Jul 11, 2018 13:56

Pornographic Memory: Dec 17, 2008

If there's another economic crash congress will magically find trillions of dollars to fork over at record speed to the business class to keep them from feeling any hardship I'm sure

# ? Jul 11, 2018 14:21

Azathoth: Apr 3, 2001

Prester Jane posted:

So what you're saying is conditions are right for another Rapid Narrative Collapse Event ala Malheur.

I would concur with that analysis. And since this is going to be heavily-armed wackos pointing guns at antifa instead of heavily armed federal agents- the odds of something terrible happening here are pretty significant.

I think we're heading for an "antifa" massacre where a group of CHUDs kill a whole bunch of random protesters, and I don't mean a lone wolf kind of attack or a spur of the moment attack, but a planned massacre.

That said, I would argue that such an event wouldn't really be a narrative collapse, but more of a logical extension of the narrative already playing out.

The real chance for a narrative collapse, I think, is around the idea that Trump is "their guy". We've seen some fraying of this with the more explicitly white nationalist groups, but most seem to still be holding on to that idea.

I don't know what the trigger event will be, but Trump has a well documented history of burning long term allies for short term gain, and I can't help but think it'll center around that.

# ? Jul 11, 2018 14:54

rudatron: May 31, 2011; by Fluffdaddy

the trigger will be the tariffs, neither trump nor china is going to back down and it's going to plunge the US into an economic death spiral

# ? Jul 11, 2018 15:20

Bushiz: Sep 21, 2004; The #1 Threat to Ba Sing Se; Grimey Drawer

Azathoth posted:

I think we're heading for an "antifa" massacre where a group of CHUDs kill a whole bunch of random protesters, and I don't mean a lone wolf kind of attack or a spur of the moment attack, but a planned massacre.

That said, I would argue that such an event wouldn't really be a narrative collapse, but more of a logical extension of the narrative already playing out.

The real chance for a narrative collapse, I think, is around the idea that Trump is "their guy". We've seen some fraying of this with the more explicitly white nationalist groups, but most seem to still be holding on to that idea.

I don't know what the trigger event will be, but Trump has a well documented history of burning long term allies for short term gain, and I can't help but think it'll center around that.

the incredibly paranoid part of my brain thinks that some nazi threepers are gonna open fire when they feel "attacked" by antifa protestors. I don't think it's gonna be a planned thing, except by maybe one person. The rest of the threepers will just join in when they hear gunfire. There'll be arrests, but the DA will decline to prosecute ruling it self-defense, a media narrative will come about how antifa is a dangerous terrorist group (we need one now that d'aesh is collapsing) and it'll essentially be open season for white supremacists against minorities and people who have david graeber in their search history.

# ? Jul 11, 2018 15:35

BornAPoorBlkChild: Sep 24, 2012

what have i been posting almost every. single. time here? what the gently caress have i been trying to convince you people the moment i changed my username so many years ago?

i literally remember when i posted a thread about The White Nationalist Who Calls Himself Paul Kersey, and I immediately got dogpilled for it in D&D (ironically using FREEZEPEACH in 2012 before it really became the bullshit deflect that it is today)

https://twitter.com/Anawnnemus/status/1017049637855907840

BornAPoorBlkChild has issued a correction as of 15:50 on Jul 11, 2018

# ? Jul 11, 2018 15:41

BENGHAZI 2: Oct 13, 2007; by Cyrano4747

Jose posted:

https://twitter.com/DeoTasDevil/status/1015010026111557635

One of the guys melting down hardest about this is a known pedo

# ? Jul 11, 2018 15:41

chitoryu12: Apr 24, 2014

Bushiz posted:

the incredibly paranoid part of my brain thinks that some nazi threepers are gonna open fire when they feel "attacked" by antifa protestors. I don't think it's gonna be a planned thing, except by maybe one person. The rest of the threepers will just join in when they hear gunfire. There'll be arrests, but the DA will decline to prosecute ruling it self-defense, a media narrative will come about how antifa is a dangerous terrorist group (we need one now that d'aesh is collapsing) and it'll essentially be open season for white supremacists against minorities and people who have david graeber in their search history.

Yeah, this is my most likely guess. They're already trigger-happy and showing up to protests openly carrying weapons with the full intent of using them if they're in danger. Remember that the Boston Massacre was started by some people throwing rocks and one soldier either panicking or accidentally pulling the trigger.

This is also why I was seriously against an earlier suggestion of using stuff like fireworks or CO2 bombs to disorient fascist protesters. They sound extremely similar to gunfire and that's a really bad thing to have when you've got paranoid people with guns.

If the police were any good at their jobs, they'd be moving anyone openly carrying a gun away from the protests. But they're not.

# ? Jul 11, 2018 15:42

BornAPoorBlkChild: Sep 24, 2012

Jose posted:

https://twitter.com/DeoTasDevil/status/1015010026111557635

https://twitter.com/CaptainFuzzEars/status/1015245594787500032

# ? Jul 11, 2018 16:19

Feldegast42: Oct 29, 2011; COMMENCE THE RITE OF SHITPOSTING

Sheng-Ji Yang posted:

Yes. It is an allegorical movie that predicts the upcoming WWIII in Europe, to fight back Islamic invasion. I am being very serious, no joking at all.

The island represents EU. Look at the map does it look like EU flag?

There are early birds and late birds on the island, which represent hardworking countries like Germany and lazy countries like Greece.

The �Anger management lesson� represents the liberalism in Europe that urge people to treat everything with love.

Also, the teacher is one of the few pure-white birds in the movie. This represents the �white-guilty�.

Then there is the doctor, whose skin color matches Israel flag perfectly. The doctor�s name is Weinstein, which is a Jewish name.

Then watch the art that these birds create. All the things hanging on the wall represents left-wing ideology. Diversity, LGBT etc.

However, the red bird is the only one creating artworks that represents heroism, which has been seen as war crime in contemporary European culture.

Then there is the free hug bird. Also this guy is pure white.

The red bird couldn�t cross the road and had to wait so long for an old woman. If she let him cross first, it wouldn�t affect the old woman at all. This is satirical to the low-efficiency of the society in Europe of too much welfare.

Finally, the arrival of a ship of pigs broke the peaceful life of the birds. There is a frame in the movie that shows the world map drawn by the birds, and the only thing on the map is the bird island, which ridicules Europeans ignoring the threat from outside. I couldn�t find a screenshot for this frame on the internet, but it happens when the pigs were attacking the village.

The pigs coming from a ship represents the refugees.

The king of the pigs have a �Muslim beard� that didn�t exist in the original mobile game. And of obviously, some TNT on the ship. Green is the color of Islam, and pig is very sensitive to Muslims. What does a green pig mean?

The angle of his staff looks like the new moon symbol of Islam.

When the birds are shocked by the number of pigs on the ship, the king comforted them by showing those pigs only came to bring joy and love. They did the cowboy dance that the birds have never seen. All the pigs are male, and most of the refugees are young men.

Also, the angle of this hat, the new moon & star symbol of Islam.

However, some of the pigs lust for the female birds, like the rapes conducted by refugees in Germany and Sweden.

Then when the pigs were playing with the eggs, the sheriff of the bird stopped the red bird from being angry and suspicious: �You are making our guests feeling uncomfortable!�

And the bird sheriff looks exactly like Angela Merkel.

Also the red bird striped her cloak off to show other birds that she was standing on the top of another bird, which ridicules the liberals standing on the �highland of morals� to blame anyone against their wills.

Then the story moves on. More and more pigs arrived on the island, even exceeding the number of birds. On one night, they attracted all the birds to a concert and bombed their homes. This is Paris attack.

The pigs stole the bird eggs away. Eggs are the offsprings of the birds. Europe has very low fertility rate for decades, and some say immigration of young people from outside world can save the aging demographics of Europe from bankrupting on welfare. However, the immigrants are using more welfare than what they create in Europe. The percentage of population of native Europeans is constantly decreasing because of muslim immigration. The stealing of eggs is an analogy to the �gradual genocide by immigration with high fertility rate�.

The three birds that knew the problem first are in the color order of Germany flag. Every bird has all three color elements. Look at the eyebrow, hair and beak. This represents in WWIII, Germany will fight on the same side as other European countries.

Another possible interpretation is the black bird represents black people, and the yellow swift bird represents East Asians. They are fighting on the same side against radical Islam. When the birds were building the ship, the yellow bird built it in an incredible speed, like how the economy of China went.

The mighty eagle of course, is the United States. It lives far away and keeps the peace of the bird island, like NATO. All the birds couldn�t fly except the Mighty Eagle, which means Europe has almost lost its militaristic ability since WWII.

However, the Might Eagle is retired/tired and pisses into the Lake of Wisdom. This shows America is not as strong as it was before (Coincidence to #Make America Great Again). The Mighty Eagle has 13 trophies, which represents the 13 states in the beginning of the United States. The eagle wallows in its brilliance before, just like America.

When the other birds need help, the Mighty Eagle didn�t react right away and decides to let the birds fight first. This resembles the prevailing isolationism in America.

After the catastrophe happened, the birds finally realized that the vigilance of the red bird since the beginning is correct. So the red bird became the leader. This represents people of Europe will elect far right wing leaders when things are messed up.

The red bird: �Our ancestors are dinosaurs!� This will be the rise of white-supremacism and new Nazi. The new political correctness became anger instead of love in the new world order.

When the birds arrived onto the pig island, they were surprised that the pigs were still in the form of kingdom. The bird island has democracy, but the pigs don�t. Another perfect allegory. In the pig kingdom there is a big board that writes �Hamnesty International� but this scene flashes out very quickly within a second. I guess this is the most direct parody in the film.

(It�s very hard to find any screenshots from movie in this part. Please go watch the movie if you haven�t)

When the Mighty Eagle watched the birds fighting on the pig island, he finally decided to pick up his glory again and fight for the birds. This predicts the USA will help eventually just as it did in WWI and WWII.

Then of course they won and took their eggs back. There is no doubt that Europe and USA will win WWIII. The red bird is honored as the hero.

Also, this movie indicates a fight back from conservatives in the libral-dominated Hollywood. The script writer Jon Vetti went to the rally of Chris Christie in New Hampshire this Feburary and will probably vote for Donald Trump in November. Political tourists flock to New Hampshire for up-close view

Let�s just wait for the future to prove this. The Angry Birds Movie

Pls do the Emoji movie kthnx

# ? Jul 11, 2018 16:24

DAD LOST MY IPOD: Feb 3, 2012; Fats Dominar is on the case

y�all acting like the Nazis didn�t already murder someone at a protest. heather heyer was one woman and her death effectively strangled the alt right in its tracks. it�s far too dangerous to them to try to repeat the Greensboro massacre� instead, we�ll see a ramp up of what they�re already doing, which is stochastic terrorism. they are trying to whip up their most unstable followers into a frenzy so some unbalanced failson like Fields goes out after a protest and guns down some libs. that way the leaders have plausible deniability and are insulated from any consequences.

# ? Jul 11, 2018 16:24

Epic High Five: Jun 5, 2004

Race Realists posted:

https://twitter.com/CaptainFuzzEars/status/1015245594787500032

IF LIBERAL: "you should stop being so divisive and listen to the other table, bipartisanship and togetherness is what will see us through this"

IF NAZI: "god bless you for upholding the values of free speech and I'm sorry that those meanies are saying mean things, I just told them to stop hopefully they will"

# ? Jul 11, 2018 16:30

Feldegast42: Oct 29, 2011; COMMENCE THE RITE OF SHITPOSTING

There have been a bunch of terrorist attacks from these guys already (in the form of school / mass shootings) and the media has been downplaying their involvement at every turn. A couple times they have done the "lone wolf, nobody will ever know what drove him to do this :rolleyes:

" thing then quietly bury that he used to rant about minorities months after the incident.

# ? Jul 11, 2018 16:32

chitoryu12: Apr 24, 2014

DAD LOST MY IPOD posted:

y�all acting like the Nazis didn�t already murder someone at a protest. heather heyer was one woman and her death effectively strangled the alt right in its tracks. it�s far too dangerous to them to try to repeat the Greensboro massacre� instead, we�ll see a ramp up of what they�re already doing, which is stochastic terrorism. they are trying to whip up their most unstable followers into a frenzy so some unbalanced failson like Fields goes out after a protest and guns down some libs. that way the leaders have plausible deniability and are insulated from any consequences.

That was a crazy dude intentionally performing an attack. It's a bit different when it's a large number of people who start fearing for their lives and start shooting.

Plus, again, they've already been doing terrorist attacks. I think almost every mass shooting that's occurred recently has been an alt-right guy.

# ? Jul 11, 2018 16:36

BrutalistMcDonalds: Oct 4, 2012; Lipstick Apathy

DAD LOST MY IPOD posted:

y’all acting like the Nazis didn’t already murder someone at a protest. heather heyer was one woman and her death effectively strangled the alt right in its tracks. it’s far too dangerous to them to try to repeat the Greensboro massacre— instead, we’ll see a ramp up of what they’re already doing, which is stochastic terrorism. they are trying to whip up their most unstable followers into a frenzy so some unbalanced failson like Fields goes out after a protest and guns down some libs. that way the leaders have plausible deniability and are insulated from any consequences.

i keep going back to the waco biker shootout because the cops didn't hesitate to fire into the bikers with rifles and then mass arrest everyone.

# ? Jul 11, 2018 16:39

pookel: Oct 27, 2011; Ultra Carp

Epic High Five posted:

IF LIBERAL: "you should stop being so divisive and listen to the other table, bipartisanship and togetherness is what will see us through this"

IF NAZI: "god bless you for upholding the values of free speech and I'm sorry that those meanies are saying mean things, I just told them to stop hopefully they will"

Alt-right: "You lefties call people Nazis just for disagreeing with you! The only real Nazis have been gone for decades!"
Also alt-right: "Liberals are the REAL Nazis for saying people shouldn't be mean to each other, which basically makes them the thought police. Conservatives are the victims here."
Still alt-right: "The Nazis did nothing wrong. Heil Hitler!"

Consistency is not their strong suit.

# ? Jul 11, 2018 17:03

Epic High Five: Jun 5, 2004

pookel posted:

Alt-right: "You lefties call people Nazis just for disagreeing with you! The only real Nazis have been gone for decades!"
Also alt-right: "Liberals are the REAL Nazis for saying people shouldn't be mean to each other, which basically makes them the thought police. Conservatives are the victims here."
Still alt-right: "The Nazis did nothing wrong. Heil Hitler!"

Consistency is not their strong suit.

I mean, they're consistent in that they apply this profoundly myopic worldview to all things up to and including concentration camps for toddlers

like, they THINK Clinton is running a child sex ring so it becomes reality, but the federal government is CURRENTLY running a for real one and it's like, whatever, you commit a misdemeanor in the US and your children are taken from you and sold into pedophile sex rings, THAT'S JUST HOW IT IS AND IT'S GOOD THIN BLUE LINE ARE TROOPS

# ? Jul 11, 2018 17:04

sleeptalker: Feb 17, 2011

chitoryu12 posted:

Yeah, this is my most likely guess. They're already trigger-happy and showing up to protests openly carrying weapons with the full intent of using them if they're in danger. Remember that the Boston Massacre was started by some people throwing rocks and one soldier either panicking or accidentally pulling the trigger.

This is also why I was seriously against an earlier suggestion of using stuff like fireworks or CO2 bombs to disorient fascist protesters. They sound extremely similar to gunfire and that's a really bad thing to have when you've got paranoid people with guns.

If the police were any good at their jobs, they'd be moving anyone openly carrying a gun away from the protests. But they're not.

I keep thinking of that Charlotesville vid where an old white nationalist pulled out a handgun, yelled a racial slur, aimed at protestors, and pulled the trigger, but happened to have the safety on. He then switched it off and fired into the dirt or something. Cops didn't do anything at the scene and only tracked him down later because of the video.

poo poo could have gone any number of different ways.

# ? Jul 11, 2018 19:02

gaydad: Mar 23, 2015

https://twitter.com/BretWeinstein/status/1016545623871401984
the honorable right lol

# ? Jul 11, 2018 19:17

Relevant Tangent: Nov 18, 2016; Tangentially Relevant

Zeroisanumber posted:

I don't get how you show up in public wearing an SS uniform and don't end up hospitalized.

Nobody wants to go to jail to own the 'ironic Nazi'. Especially because they're going to argue successfully that it's just a costume.

# ? Jul 11, 2018 19:25

prisoner of waffles: May 8, 2007; Ah! well a-day! what evil looks
Had I from old and young!
Instead of the cross, the fishmech
About my neck was hung.

how monolithic has the u.s. culture war made the right wing? I dunno but I'm afraid the answer is something like, "yes, their primary issues are all different but diverse right wingers all agree that The Real Enemies Are The Liberals"-- even when leftists are taken as the boogeymen, the rightwing fear-narrative tends to flow through "and if those stupid liberals win again and [give everyone health care e.g.] then [we'll be living in a totalitarian state e.g.]"

Also the republican party really does seem to have its internal discipline down pat.

# ? Jul 11, 2018 19:26

The Phlegmatist: Nov 24, 2003

they're mostly held together by triggering the libs these days. it's a shaky alliance.

pookel posted:

Alt-right: "You lefties call people Nazis just for disagreeing with you! The only real Nazis have been gone for decades!"
Also alt-right: "Liberals are the REAL Nazis for saying people shouldn't be mean to each other, which basically makes them the thought police. Conservatives are the victims here."
Still alt-right: "The Nazis did nothing wrong. Heil Hitler!"

Consistency is not their strong suit.

the alt-right has built up a lot of scaffolding to be totally not-racist. well, portions of the alt-right anyway. that's what white separatism and identitarianism are all about. it's the "if they have a black entertainment network why can't we have a white entertainment network" of ideologies.

that's why they get so mad when you call them nazis and they're obsessed with the marketplace of ideas. you're not respecting the rhetorical tricks they use to be extremely not-racist fascists.

# ? Jul 11, 2018 19:33

SpaceGoku: Jul 19, 2011

prisoner of waffles posted:

Also the republican party really does seem to have its internal discipline down pat.

a lot of this is the fact that apparent treason against another republican can get you hassled by the base aggressively, or outright primaried from the right

also resentment towards whatever liberal is most popular to hate will always overrule any distaste they have for each other

# ? Jul 11, 2018 19:46

Epic High Five: Jun 5, 2004

SpaceGoku posted:

a lot of this is the fact that apparent treason against another republican can get you hassled by the base aggressively, or outright primaried from the right

also resentment towards whatever liberal is most popular to hate will always overrule any distaste they have for each other

I think once they run out of bloodless centrists who refuse to respond as they're replaced by godless lefties aching for a chance to lay them out, they'll turn on each other instead

their only ideology is to prey on anybody weaker than them, they'll immediately buckle in the face of strength

# ? Jul 11, 2018 19:49

Zikan: Feb 29, 2004

conservative parties worldwide essentially operate on dem cent while they are winning or locked in an electoral fight.

it's only when they start losing and it's obvious the public isn't buying what they are selling that the knives come out. see the recent infighting of the tory party after they got walloped in the snap elections for example

# ? Jul 11, 2018 19:52

Pener Kropoopkin: Jan 30, 2013; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
(and can't post for 30 days!)

Democratic centralism is the only way to go.

# ? Jul 11, 2018 19:54

Feldegast42: Oct 29, 2011; COMMENCE THE RITE OF SHITPOSTING

prisoner of waffles posted:

how monolithic has the u.s. culture war made the right wing? I dunno but I'm afraid the answer is something like, "yes, their primary issues are all different but diverse right wingers all agree that The Real Enemies Are The Liberals"-- even when leftists are taken as the boogeymen, the rightwing fear-narrative tends to flow through "and if those stupid liberals win again and [give everyone health care e.g.] then [we'll be living in a totalitarian state e.g.]"

Also the republican party really does seem to have its internal discipline down pat.

They all support the same thing but they have different ways to justify it. If you ask the white nationalists their opinion on kiddie koncentration kamps they will give full hearted support for them, but if you ask white moderates their opinion on kiddie koncentration kamps they will respond with some :foxnews:

bullshit that they tell themselves to convince themselves that they are in the right

# ? Jul 11, 2018 20:02

Bullfrog: Nov 5, 2012

The "shoot into a crowd of protesters because they feared for their life" thing already happened and the perp went to prison

https://www.cbsnews.com/news/minnesota-man-who-shot-5-black-lives-matter-protesters-found-guilty/

EDIT: it happened twice, that's right

https://www.seattletimes.com/seattle-news/crime/couple-charged-with-assault-in-shooting-melee-during-uw-speech-by-milo-yiannopoulos/

# ? Jul 11, 2018 20:04

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# ? May 29, 2024 16:40

SpaceGoku: Jul 19, 2011

Bullfrog posted:

The "shoot into a crowd of protesters because they feared for their life" thing already happened and the perp went to prison

https://www.cbsnews.com/news/minnesota-man-who-shot-5-black-lives-matter-protesters-found-guilty/

EDIT: it happened twice, that's right

https://www.seattletimes.com/seattle-news/crime/couple-charged-with-assault-in-shooting-melee-during-uw-speech-by-milo-yiannopoulos/

there was also some right wing "journalist" (read: streamer) who just pulled out his gun on a bunch of BLM protesters as they were walking during a demonstration, can't remember his name though because it was before the alt-right had really coalesced

# ? Jul 11, 2018 20:14

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