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Meme Poker Party
Sep 1, 2006

by Azathoth
Following the spirit of Jesus' teachings is pretty liberal so I can see why they don't like Pope Francis.

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PetraCore
Jul 20, 2017

👁️🔥👁️👁️👁️BE NOT👄AFRAID👁️👁️👁️🔥👁️

Chomp8645 posted:

Following the spirit of Jesus' teachings is pretty liberal so I can see why they don't like Pope Francis.
Yeah, I mean, it's so much easier to just estrange yourself from your entire family.

burial
Sep 13, 2002

actually, that won't be necessary.

gently caress Your Website posted:

Someone asks a normal ‘getting to know you’ question and you start spewing a bunch of random words strung together and then expect them to react as if you’ve responded substantively? Or that you’re not trying to get one over on them and fool them into thinking those are real bands? That’s not how human interaction works, that’s a Parks and Rec outtake.

I know this is a comedy forum and all but if anyone did this in IRL it’d be super obnoxious and I’d end that conversation immediately.

Why would someone be trying to get to know me though? Ha!

There are real bands and musicians that I like and can talk meaningfully about so this would never happen to me. I was just brainstorming how someone who had never been exposed to secular music could jokingly answer the question. I guess I should have specified that in my imaginary scenario, after the other person gives you a weird look, you go “Yeah, my parents were weird about music. I’m just starting to see what’s out there. Any bands that actually exist you’d recommend?”

e: I could definitely be fooled by something like this. Most band names don’t sound like actual band names.

burial fucked around with this message at 17:47 on Aug 19, 2018

Bored
Jul 26, 2007

Dude, ix-nay on the oice-vay.

Danaru posted:

Wife sucks rear end and will die forgotten by her children


:hmbol: Granny loving owns

Yep. That was loving adorable. Grammy don't give a gently caress, just give her grandbabies.

Pvt.Scott
Feb 16, 2007

What God wants, God gets, God help us all

PetraCore posted:

Yeah, I mean, it's so much easier to just estrange yourself from your entire family.

That’s what Jesus did, tho.

Absurd Alhazred
Mar 27, 2010

by Athanatos

Chomp8645 posted:

Following the spirit of Jesus' teachings is pretty liberal so I can see why they don't like Pope Francis.

Sedevacantists reject every pope since 1958, they didn't start their hate with Francis. They didn't even like Benedict XVI.

Meme Poker Party
Sep 1, 2006

by Azathoth

Absurd Alhazred posted:

Sedevacantists reject every pope since 1958, they didn't start their hate with Francis. They didn't even like Benedict XVI.

A pope: there are more important things in our temporal existence than the pursuit of wealth. Also, the poor are human beings who deserve love and respect like anyone else.



"Wow, cry me a river you liberal."

- A christian.

dudeness
Mar 5, 2010

:minnie: Cat Army :minnie:
Fallen Rib
World could use an antipope or two. At the very least it would let me use the word antipope in more conversations.

RoboRodent
Sep 19, 2012

Can I just declare myself antipope?

Mr. Lobe
Feb 23, 2007

... Dry bones...


Danaru posted:

Wife sucks rear end and will die forgotten by her children


:hmbol: Granny loving owns

man, that's in the running for one of the coolest grandmas I've ever heard about

Pick
Jul 19, 2009
Nap Ghost
tbh the hatred of gays among olds is overstated. a lot of old people hit a point where they realize they don't give af about a lot of what other people are up to. I think it more depends on the family than the age demographic.

Mr. Lobe
Feb 23, 2007

... Dry bones...


yeah but how many fine-with-gays grandparents were also arrested for civil disobedience against imperial wars as minors? she's got a lot going on

Motronic
Nov 6, 2009

I (27M) dont want to visit wife's(27F) parents all the time. Is that wrong?

quote:

We go married about 2 years ago and last year we moved to her hometown so she could be closer to her parents. The issue is that every weekend we dont have anything planned she wants us to go over to their house and just hang out. We have breakfast and then we just hang out. I told her that I dont want to go every weekend. She freaked out and asked, "why not" I said "well I just dont feel like it." Which is true I want to just be home. I told her I dont always need to visit them with her. I told her she can go by herself and that its okay, she hated that I said that. I guess I just want to know do I always need to go with her or can she go by herself? Also the live 10 minutes away.

TL;DR wife wants us over at her parents all of our free time. I dont. Is that wrong?

Beachcomber
May 21, 2007

Another day in paradise.


Slippery Tilde
Every normal person needs time to hang out without pants.

MarcusSA
Sep 23, 2007

Motronic posted:

I (27M) dont want to visit wife's(27F) parents all the time. Is that wrong?

Having been in this situation he’s right and it gets exhausting.

If she wants to go just go he doesn’t need to be there all the time.

Miserable Maid
Apr 22, 2010

:minnie: Cat Army :minnie:

Pvt.Scott posted:

That’s what Jesus did, tho.

Nah, Matthew 13:55 talked about Jesus' brothers and sisters and how they helped him spread the word. Modern religion tries to hide/downplay this for some reason, even though it's kinda inspiring for family? Maybe it's just the fact that it proclves Mary got pregnant by Joseph rather then only having virgin birth

Pick
Jul 19, 2009
Nap Ghost

MarcusSA posted:

Having been in this situation he’s right and it gets exhausting.

If she wants to go just go he doesn’t need to be there all the time.

Bamabalacha
Sep 18, 2006

Outta my way, ya dumb rah-rah!

MarcusSA posted:

Having been in this situation he’s right and it gets exhausting.

If she wants to go just go he doesn’t need to be there all the time.

My partner and I both see our parents quite a bit (both sets are cool and good, and like cooking awesome food and going to nice restaurants), but it’s usually only for a few hours at a time, for a specific activity, and the other person can totally tap out if they don’t want to go. Having to spend the whole weekend sitting around with my in laws doing nothing would drive me insane.

We also live like 5 minutes away from my parents which actually made seeing them for dinner faster and lot more convenient. Since we’ve been that close to them it’s nbd to just stop by for an hour for dinner or whatever without pressure.

Absurd Alhazred
Mar 27, 2010

by Athanatos
r/relationships: the comic

MightyJoe36
Dec 29, 2013

:minnie: Cat Army :minnie:

Pick posted:

tbh the hatred of gays among olds is overstated. a lot of old people hit a point where they realize they don't give af about a lot of what other people are up to. I think it more depends on the family than the age demographic.

I'm in my late 50s and a Christian (although I don't go to church), and as far as I'm concerned, whatever two consenting adults want to do with each other is nobody's business but their own. As long as it doesn't involve children, and nobody is being abused or exploited, let everybody do what they want.

Pick
Jul 19, 2009
Nap Ghost

MightyJoe36 posted:

I'm in my late 50s and a Christian (although I don't go to church), and as far as I'm concerned, whatever two consenting adults want to do with each other is nobody's business but their own. As long as it doesn't involve children, and nobody is being abused or exploited, let everybody do what they want.

I'm Catholic and based on what I see/hear, the 45 year olds care more than the 85 year olds.

MightyJoe36
Dec 29, 2013

:minnie: Cat Army :minnie:

Bonster posted:

Not them, but... yes. Oh, God, yes.

I practice the "smile, nod and say 'I'll have to look into that.'" technique. No, I don't think cutting gluten is going to cure my fibromyalgia. Pretty sure essential oils won't do much, but thanks!

:same: but with seizures. And add alkaline water to that. :pigoff:

MightyJoe36
Dec 29, 2013

:minnie: Cat Army :minnie:

Pick posted:

I'm Catholic and based on what I see/hear, the 45 year olds care more than the 85 year olds.I

Weird. I was brought up to be prejudiced against gays, most minorities, and pretty much everybody who didn't grow up white and in the suburbs.

The thing I'm most proud of in my life is that I raised my sons not to be prejudiced.

Barudak
May 7, 2007

If you marry Mel Gibsons sister you reap what you sow

Pick
Jul 19, 2009
Nap Ghost

MightyJoe36 posted:

Weird. I was brought up to be prejudiced against gays, most minorities, and pretty much everybody who didn't grow up white and in the suburbs.


The 85 year olds were too, but now they're old and they realized they wasted a lot of time worrying about stuff because other people told them to, and those things weren't actually a big deal.

My Imaginary GF
Jul 17, 2005

by R. Guyovich

MarcusSA posted:

Having been in this situation he’s right and it gets exhausting.

If she wants to go just go he doesn’t need to be there all the time.

Alternative solution: plan something for every weekend so that seeing them once a month becomes a routine.

I wish I were closer nearby to my old man than the girl's parents. My old man is awesome and fun, while the girl's parents are pieces of poo poo in their own seperate, unique ways.

When I lived in St. Louis for grad school, the question weren't where you were from. It was which highschool did ya go to. God, what a shitstain of a place. The worst of the north combined with southern hospitality.

Bamabalacha posted:

My partner and I both see our parents quite a bit (both sets are cool and good, and like cooking awesome food and going to nice restaurants), but it’s usually only for a few hours at a time, for a specific activity, and the other person can totally tap out if they don’t want to go. Having to spend the whole weekend sitting around with my in laws doing nothing would drive me insane.

We also live like 5 minutes away from my parents which actually made seeing them for dinner faster and lot more convenient. Since we’ve been that close to them it’s nbd to just stop by for an hour for dinner or whatever without pressure.

Have babies, then inlaws close by become a godsend.

Xenocides
Jan 14, 2008

This world looks very scary....


Another episode of “Guess the Fetish” Clue: It is much dumber then whatever you are thinking it is.

quote:

I [26/f] am having trouble dealing with/taking my boyfriends [25/m] "kink" seriously. It just makes me feel ridiculous.

So to start off my relationship with my boyfriend is great. We have been dating just over two years and he is a great guy. He is super loving handsome (like, straight up out of my league), kind, understanding, sexy, pretty much the whole package. We get a long great, and share pretty much everything with each other.

Well, I have a few 'kinks' when it comes to the bedroom and it took me about a year before I was comfortable explaining them to my boyfriend. He was super understanding about it and very eager to help me fulfill my fantasies and everything has been great. I asked him what he was into since he helped me out so much I only want to repay the favor but he was very shy about it. It took months of convincing from me telling me that I wouldn't judge him and I would be down no matter what (I consider myself very open minded).

Well, a few months ago he finally relented and told me what he was into. In terms of sex, it's actually super-vanilla. I don't really want to explain it but it is more along the lines of role play then a specific straight up sex act.

To keep this short, we tried it a few weeks ago and he really loved it, but I just felt stupid as hell. I feel so guilty about it because I know its really harmless and I sort of forced him to tell me and now I don't really know what to do. It's not something I'm UNCOMFORTABLE with in terms of not wanting to do it; but I'm just not comfortable since I feel super embarrassed, I feel like an idiot doing it. I don't really know how to break it to my boyfriend since he is super into it and he has done much weirder poo poo/outside of his comfort zone for me.

What should I do?

EDIT: Since I am getting so many messages to just explain what it is; It kind of varies a little but the gist of it is that he is a pilot (?) of a giant robot (like in the movie pacific rim) who has returned from battle or something similar. I am supposed to be either another female pilot/a civilian or any number of other things... I treat him like war hero or something and tell him how sexy I find him, or how he saved the world or something. He asks me to only call him by his "call sign" which I will NOT repeat here. Sometimes we have sex and it is at the barracks or his personal quarters or other times he will make me pretend we have loving in the cockpit of his robot (he calls it a "mecha").

For complete transperancey since some people were asking what he does for me, my kinks run along the lines of light bdsm/being tied up/watersports/anal/toys etc. More along the lines of specific acts where we are still ourselves. Less about roleplaying as other people which is where I find it difficult to grasp.

tl;dr boyfriend has strange roleplay fetish that I made him tell me about, told him I was fiine with it but when it came down to it I feel super embarrassed about it. not sure how to proceed.

The animes are messing up relationships again.

Midnight Voyager
Jul 2, 2008

Lipstick Apathy

RoboRodent posted:

Can I just declare myself antipope?

No, because then it's game over. The player character cannot be pope.

Wait, this isn't the CK2 thread.

Midnight Voyager
Jul 2, 2008

Lipstick Apathy

Xenocides posted:

Another episode of “Guess the Fetish” Clue: It is much dumber then whatever you are thinking it is.


The animes are messing up relationships again.

Read that again:

quote:

my kinks run along the lines of light bdsm/being tied up/watersports/anal/toys etc. More along the lines of specific acts where we are still ourselves. Less about roleplaying as other people which is where I find it difficult to grasp.

Ugh, stop RPing a cool anime hero in bed and just piss on me!

EDIT: (i didn't mean to double post, but I am not a smart person)

quote:

Yes! I know for a fact he isn't into it.. that is why I feel so bad about it! I really don't want to sound selfish but I am trying hard. When I first brought it up with him he said he was not sure about it (still isn't really his thing at all) but he does it for me, so I want to repay him for that of course. I'm just struggling with taking it seriously during the act.

Midnight Voyager fucked around with this message at 21:41 on Aug 19, 2018

Xenocides
Jan 14, 2008

This world looks very scary....


Midnight Voyager posted:

Read that again:


Ugh, stop RPing a cool anime hero in bed and just piss on me!

(i didn't mean to double post, but I am not a smart person)

To be fair whips and rope and golden showers are just normal kink but that anime roleplay is just......bad.

Danaru
Jun 5, 2012

何 ??
Oh man there was a period of two weeks or so where noted creepo and possibly perma'd user Elsa drew a comic of that story and it had the Jaeger pissing on a tied up godzilla

I think it was after his weird art theft porn photoshops but before he cranked one to a mod and told them about it

Freudian
Mar 23, 2011

My [31F] best friend [30F] is a mega bridezilla and just revealed that I’m pregnant, when I haven’t even told any of my own family yet, and even though I may miscarry.

quote:

I’m the matron of honour in my best friend’s wedding. When she asked me over a year ago, I was so psyched. My own wedding was very small and low key, and hers is anything but - and I was so happy to be a part of it. I love hosting parties, so I was especially looking forward to the shower and bachelorette that I could throw her.

This wedding has brought out the absolute worst in my friend. It’s been an endless source of drama for the past year, and not in the way that all weddings are - it’s crisis after crisis, and it came to a head this week.

I’ll spare you the details of past dramas, because this post would stretch for miles, but in summary: nothing anyone does is good enough, so much work has been thrown my way that I feel completely used and burnt out, and the world revolves only around her. Example: my mom is going through chemo for a very aggressive cancer. My friend never asks how she’s doing; her sole topics of conversation is the wedding and how much she hates her future in-laws. I don’t expect my mom’s lovely cancer to monopolize our conversation, and I’m more than happy to talk about the wedding for hours, but seriously, an inquiry to see how my mom/I am holding up would be grand.

Ok, onto the actual issue. I’m eight weeks pregnant with my second child. Planned pregnancy, and the bride knew we were trying months ago and it wasn’t an issue then apparently.

I told her almost as soon as I knew I was pregnant - I wanted to get ahead of it and not surprise her when we go to a dress fitting, for example, and I refuse champagne. When I told her, I swore her to secrecy. I told her I wasn’t even telling my family or my husband’s family until we’re out of the first trimester because we’ve had a few miscarriages and man does it suck to have to tell your family you’ve miscarried. She said she understood and would keep it quiet. The wedding is in two months and my dress is a loose empire waist - no one will know I’m pregnant there, and I was happy keeping it that way.

Earlier this week we’re off doing wedding things and she says casually that her future mother-in-law thinks I should be demoted to bridesmaid since I’m pregnant. My immediate response: how the hell does she know I’m pregnant? I think she was surprised I’d caught her, and she stuttered out that her fiancé told the mother-in-law. I don’t think that’s true, as I was on the phone later that day with her mother, who congratulated me. So now both sides of the wedding know.

I’m so incredibly pissed and hurt. These people don’t know my family, so I’m not too concerned about it getting back to them, but my immediate concern is what happens if i miscarry. I’ll presumably have people congratulating me at the upcoming shower, and I’ll either get to grit my teeth and say thanks to avoid drama/making the shower about me, or I’ll tell them what’s happened and make it the shittiest shower ever. I’m so pissed right now I’m leaning to option two. Obviously I’m hoping this pregnancy sticks, but with a history of miscarriages, this is where my mind goes.

I feel betrayed. I haven’t confronted her because in the moment she told me I was so shocked I froze, which is my go-to stress response. She doesn’t know how hurt I am. I’ve realized that this is the last straw of this friendship - the entire wedding has strained us, and this event did it in.

My initial plan was ghosting after the wedding. I’ll be a good matron of honour because it’s the right thing to do, but after she leaves for the honeymoon, I’m going to fade away. She’s so self absorbed I doubt she’ll notice. But then my husband suggested I just walk out, tell her I feel betrayed, leave the wedding, and end it now. And I can’t help but admit, I really, really want to - I am so angry that the thought of attending the wedding and hosting the shower makes me ill. It’s complicated by the fact that despite the wedding’s size, the wedding party itself is just me and the best man - there’s no obvious next bridesmaid to step up if I walk.

Thoughts on what I should do? Burn this mother fucker to the ground and moonwalk outta here? Or act like a civilized human and go through with the wedding?

TLDR: mega bridezilla told everyone in her wedding I’m pregnant, even though I haven’t told my family, and even though I’m at risk for a miscarriage. I’m very concerned I might have to tell all of these random people I’ve miscarried. More than that, I’m betrayed and hurt by her behaviour. I want to do a runner on the whole wedding and end our friendship in flames. Should I?

Edit: because there’s some confusion in the comments, the bride doesn’t actually want to demote me, unfortunately. That is what her mother-in-law wants, and it was told to me in a “can you believe she’d think that?” sort of way.

Edit 2: thanks all for the responses, I super appreciate it. I went into this thinking that walking was obviously the wrong choice, but I’ve come to feel it’s justified. I’m drafting a polite, graceful-as-I-can-manage email about how I’m hurt and can’t in good conscience be her matron of honour feeling like this. Again, thanks all!

ArbitraryC
Jan 28, 2009
Pick a number, any number
Pillbug

Xenocides posted:

Another episode of “Guess the Fetish” Clue: It is much dumber then whatever you are thinking it is.


The animes are messing up relationships again.

I was gonna joke about the mecha thing until she just sorta casually slipped in watersports, particularly when she knows he's not into it.

PetraCore
Jul 20, 2017

👁️🔥👁️👁️👁️BE NOT👄AFRAID👁️👁️👁️🔥👁️

ArbitraryC posted:

I was gonna joke about the mecha thing until she just sorta casually slipped in watersports, particularly when she knows he's not into it.
The fuel line's leaking!

Midnight Voyager
Jul 2, 2008

Lipstick Apathy

Xenocides posted:

To be fair whips and rope and golden showers are just normal kink but that anime roleplay is just......bad.

If he can pee on her/get peed on even though he is 100% not into it, she can pretend he's an anime hero. Or they can just both stop doing things they're not into. Whichever way doesn't turn into "I'm going to indulge your kink I'm not into even though you don't indulge mine." Make that poo poo even.

also, I would not put whips and rope in the same category of normal as pissplay, but maybe that's just me! I'd RP a hundred dumb animes before even considering getting piss involved. Piss is specifically a thing people draw lines at, not a totes normal thing you can slip in under "light bdsm".

Pick
Jul 19, 2009
Nap Ghost
Pee is gross, also it seems like that would be really messy.

La Brea Carpet
Nov 22, 2007

I have no mouth and I must post
My [33/F] husband [35/M] of 3 years has been acting really weird lately

quote:

There have been some odd things my husband has done recently that I can't make sense of:

1: He's got dozens of pictures on his phone all of the same woman. They go back months. She's usually out in public but a few look like it was taken through a window. She's just going about her life in this photos. Getting into her car, walking on the street, in a grocery store, unlocking her door. All normal things. Why does he have these? I can't ask because I admit I was snooping through his picture gallery.

2: He keeps a jar of loose change that's been getting full. Recently I found out he TAKES this money from homeless people! When they're sleeping or not paying attention he grabs their cups of coins. I found this out because a coworker who's met him witnessed two of those times and got a picture the second time. I confronted him and he denied it. But it's absolutely him in the picture. Finally he admitted he did it "for the thrill." He said it was only that time and that he feels embarrassed. He also came home with unexplained bruises a couple weeks ago, now I wonder if he got beat up doing this. Unbelievable.

3: He has suddenly developed a weird fetish I've got no interest in, he keeps bringing it up. Usually unwilling to have any sex without involving it. All his porn revolves around this bizarre fetish and he'll stay up until 4 am some nights just jerking to porn.

4: Finally, we have a mutual friend who's been out of a job for months after getting laid off. He's constantly searching but never gets any offers, not even interviews. He met up with me yesterday where he told me that a place he applied called back to chew him out for wasting their time with a "joke" application. When he looked at his resume he found there were lines listing things like masturbation and dealing weed as work experience. He sent the resume to my husband for edits after he got laid off. Apparently my husband sent it back saying it was really good and he only fixed some spelling, so our friend never looked at it again. He's been applying with the version my husband sabotaged for months, explaining why he still hasn't been hired. When he confronted my husband, my husband laughed saying it was a joke and didn't think our friend wouldn't catch it. He thought it was hilarious he'd actually been sending out that resume for months. I told him I'd talk to my husband but I don't even know what to say besides WTF.

I have no idea if any of these things are connected or what, he's never done anything like this before. He's normally very even-tempered, kind, thoughtful, and loyal. He does not do drugs or have a mental illness, that I know of. But after this I'm starting to feel wary of him like I don't actually know him as much as I thought I did.

Does anyone have any theory on what could be going on? It would really help me prepare for when I talk to him.

tl;dr: I don't understand my husband's recent strange behaviors, including stealing homeless people's donation cups and sneaking inappropriate things into a friend's resume causing him to miss out on job offers.

It's either drugs or a tumor.

PetraCore
Jul 20, 2017

👁️🔥👁️👁️👁️BE NOT👄AFRAID👁️👁️👁️🔥👁️

Pick posted:

Pee is gross, also it seems like that would be really messy.
People always trot out pee being sterile but that's not true, the tests done in that study weren't very good at catching certain kinds of bacteria.

I mean whatever if someone cleans up after themselves it could be worse and sex is kinda inherently a bit grody but it's not 'almost vanilla' either.

burial
Sep 13, 2002

actually, that won't be necessary.

Danaru posted:

Oh man there was a period of two weeks or so where noted creepo and possibly perma'd user Elsa drew a comic of that story and it had the Jaeger pissing on a tied up godzilla

I think it was after his weird art theft porn photoshops but before he cranked one to a mod and told them about it

I remember that! Those drawings were actually awesome. They were in this very thread, weren’t they?

Also I didn’t know about that cranking it to a mod thing. Jeez.

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Pick
Jul 19, 2009
Nap Ghost
I don't even care if it has bacteria, it's gross and it smells bad (like pee).

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