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La Brea Carpet posted:My daughter [32/F] is threatening to ban me [54/F] from attending her wedding. Wow, what an ungrateful kid, after all the work you've done setting her up with this random dude you met at the DMV. 
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Aug 20, 2018 03:13
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that entire post reads like what racist white people think native people think native people have an actually different culture and it doesn't come across exactly like racist white ppl culture w/ the werds switched aroond
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Aug 20, 2018 03:13
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quote:She already refused to let me go with her on her bachelorette party after I tried to take control and make the party the way I want it. lol rude
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Aug 20, 2018 04:07
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Pick posted:fayke Having lived on the rez, this is poo poo that happens. Depending on the tribe and band you belong to, there often is intense pressure to avoid miscegination --- in some cases going so far as to disenroll parents or entire family groups from the tribe for having a daughter that marries outside the band. Tribes be hosed up political units. In the wods of Professor Fukuyama of Stanford, its the "tyranny of cousins" which reigns supreme in tribal politics.
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Aug 20, 2018 04:08
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Beachcomber posted:I knew this would come in handy 
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Aug 20, 2018 04:13
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Pick posted:that entire post reads like what racist white people think native people think EDIT: Like it might not be but it sounds like nobody else in the family is supporting the mom even.
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Aug 20, 2018 04:27
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My Imaginary GF posted:Having lived on the rez, this is poo poo that happens. Depending on the tribe and band you belong to, there often is intense pressure to avoid miscegination --- in some cases going so far as to disenroll parents or entire family groups from the tribe for having a daughter that marries outside the band. Way too many prominent Jews think this way, too, unfortunately. See the new Jewish Agency chief. Probably a bit tougher in native societies since there might not be as straightforward a conversion path?
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Aug 20, 2018 04:28
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Xenocides posted:Another episode of “Guess the Fetish” Clue: It is much dumber then whatever you are thinking it is. quote:Hey, maybe you can combine your stuff with his stuff! Like, do your acts as part of his fantasy. Oh no there's a fire in your mecha, let me pee on it!
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Aug 20, 2018 04:29
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Pick posted:that entire post reads like what racist white people think native people think Pick, you're like the 3olives of the relationship thread: dropping hot takes from the comfort of your airconditioned texas condo. Go up to Red Lake and see the animosity that exists between members and outsiders. In a way, I'm fortunate to descend from mediteranean and eastern european jews - folk in the northwoods can't place whether I'm white, native, or something else by my skin color, which lets me pass between cultures. There's also not one 'native culture': you've got 530+ independent political units of varying population size and socioeconomic political development. A Shakopee member probably ain't sharing a Red Lake member's culturally-reinforced hostility towards miscegination.
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Aug 20, 2018 04:30
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I think with First Nations cultures there's the problem where there's been a lot of concerted genocide efforts diluting both the ethnicity and the culture so there's a lot of people struggling with how to reclaim that. There was a court case up in my state a few years back where a Native couple on a reservation (I think Ojibwe but don't remember exactly) were going to adopt out their baby but the couple they'd chosen to adopt to was white and definitely didn't live on the reservation, and when the tribal leaders got wind of that they legally contested the adoption using laws that were intended to keep kids from being forcibly taken from their parents and then raised outside the culture. Because that used to happen, a lot! But the parents got understandably pretty upset over their parental right to pick the adoptive parents of their infant being debated because of their race, and things dragged on for so long the baby was born and had to be raised in by a neutral third party for like half a year before things settled. It was pretty hosed up because I get the logic but also, the parents deliberately didn't want their baby to grow up on the reservation because they felt it was a toxic and insular environment that provided them with disadvantages growing up. It wasn't even a matter of culture so much as immediate environment... and I think the moves by the tribal elders to keep the baby on the reservation just kind of proved the point? EDIT: Like parents adopting their baby out to a white family completely willingly and with full awareness of potential complications is a very different situation than children being forcibly taken from their parents and given to white families. PetraCore fucked around with this message at 04:37 on Aug 20, 2018 |
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Aug 20, 2018 04:35
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PetraCore posted:Yeah and also any kids would still be Navajo? Just raise them in the culture. How do the blood quantum tribal laws play into that, I wonder? It might not be so cut and dried.
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Aug 20, 2018 04:37
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Yond Cassius posted:How do the blood quantum tribal laws play into that, I wonder? It might not be so cut and dried.
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Aug 20, 2018 04:39
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My Imaginary GF posted:Pick, you're like the 3olives of the relationship thread: dropping hot takes from the comfort of your airconditioned texas condo. lmao I have no interest in dropping how I know about this issue but lol
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Aug 20, 2018 04:50
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and it's not that they're more or less accepting per se, it's that the entire framework of the rhetoric is different
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Aug 20, 2018 04:51
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PetraCore posted:I think with First Nations cultures there's the problem where there's been a lot of concerted genocide efforts diluting both the ethnicity and the culture so there's a lot of people struggling with how to reclaim that. There was an episode of Weediquette of all things that focused on the ‘dilution’ aspect. You had to have a certain % specifically Paiute to be able to work growing/dispensing. Good money for those that fit the bill, but some were worried for their family members. One man worried for his nephew’s future because the ‘blood quantum laws’ said he wasn’t Paiute enough, IIRC. The ep was called Pot Powwow https://www.viceland.com/en_us/video/pot-powwow/57d1852d2dd00009023d3284
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Aug 20, 2018 05:09
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fake imo because there's just too much junk like thisquote:She already refused to let me go with her on her bachelorette party after I tried to take control and make the party the way I want it.
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Aug 20, 2018 05:17
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i like nice words
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My Imaginary GF posted:A Shakopee member probably ain't sharing a Red Lake member's culturally-reinforced hostility towards miscegination. The fact that this tribe comes up after the watersports fetish lady is beautiful
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Aug 20, 2018 05:24
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La Brea Carpet posted:My daughter [32/F] is threatening to ban me [54/F] from attending her wedding. That’s bait
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Aug 20, 2018 06:04
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Yond Cassius posted:How do the blood quantum tribal laws play into that, I wonder? It might not be so cut and dried. Like most issues pertaining to Federally-recognized Indian tribes, the answer is usually 'it depends.' I'll have to look at my notes for an article I was writing a couple years back on tribal disenrollment, however, from what I recall off the top of my head, the tl;dr of blood quantum is that its a legacy policy issue which impacts present tribes and individuals in as many ways as there are Federally recognized tribes. I'll spare the details on how blood quantum developed as policy. Generally, the way blood quantum functions in tribes at present is as follows: Federally-recognized tribes are required to establish and maintain enrollment policies, regulations, and procedures with the Bureau Indian Affairs (BIA). Under authority delegated by Congress, BIA determines compliance for tribes with Federal law, regulation, policy, and procedure. Many tribes have a set blood quantum requirement for enrollment. Most tribes with blood quantum requirements for enrollment have established 'enrollment boards' and delegated the authority to determine blood quantum to enrollment boards. These enrollment boards are often constituted of political appointees, most often members of the tribe directly appointed by the Tribal Chair, Tribal Executive Council, or other Tribal chief political position. Per our Constitution, the Federal government generally 'defers to tribes on matters of internal self-governance', of which internal processes by tribes for enrollment/membership determination is considered paramount by the Federal government for maintenance of a tribe as a sovereign entity, which thereby ensures the tribe's members are regarded as Indians not otherwised taxed. In the past, Federally recognized tribes which have not maintained blood quantum requirements have been de-recognized by BIA. In the past, Federally recognized tribes which have attempted to modify their established enrollment policies relating to blood quantum, particularly eliminating blood quantum considerations from tribal enrollment procedures, have lost their Federal recognition. Who determines blood quantum? Generally, the tribes. Who in the tribes? Most frequently that I've come across from my research, political appointees of the current tribal administration (calling all Federally recognized tribes is even more time-consuming than it sounds). How do tribes determine blood quantum levels? In accordinance with policies established with the BIA, which quite often maintain the character of those originally registered with BIA under the 1934 Indian Reorganization Act. What is the human impact of blood quantum? I worked with two sisters, aged Kindergarten and elementry school. They danced semi-professionally on the pow-wow circuit. Their mother was 60% blood quantum enrolled in the band/documented with BIA and their father 0%/was white. Girls were considered 30% blood quantum. Tribe has/had a 25% blood quantum requirement for enrollment. Girls were culturally native yet perceived as white because of the color of their skin. This created political issues for the tribal government, as a large faction of core tribe families felt the tribe was becoming too 'white' and the sisters were perceived by 'more pure' (read: perceived as racially native) enrolled members of their band as white. The tribal enrollment board, constituted of political appointees, denied the girls enrollment in the tribe, despite their repeated applications year after year. I was seeing the elementry school girl on a weekly basis because she'd began cutting from all the bullying and other identity conflict issues she was going through. If you really want to see some tyranical racial government policy, look into retroactive determinations of ancestral blood quantums and tribal disenrollments.
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Aug 20, 2018 06:08
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quote:She already refused to let me go with her on her bachelorette party after I tried to take control and make the party the way I want it. yeah lol if you think poo poo like this is anything other than low effort bait written by a white racist man
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Aug 20, 2018 06:33
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Yond Cassius posted:How do the blood quantum tribal laws play into that, I wonder? It might not be so cut and dried. PetraCore posted:Okay, fair enough. I don't actually know poo poo about that so I shouldn't make assumptions. It's just not like a healthy family is going to come out of forcing people together when it's explicitly unwanted. The other issue, especially in the southwest before the 1923 Indian Citizenship Act, is that slavery was still practiced. Before 1923, if one was neither enrolled in a tribe nor an American citizen, then in effect that individual was a non-person and denied access to recourse against being held in debt peonage or indentured servitude.
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Aug 20, 2018 06:42
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quote:Girlfriend (21F) heavily burdened by her religion's strict rules, Me (21F) trying to support her while still being respectful to her faith So you are online dating a Mormon who wants one of you to change genders to get around temple marriage rules (which will not work) before you have even met in person?
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Aug 20, 2018 06:47
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Xenocides posted:So you are online dating a Mormon who wants one of you to change genders to get around temple marriage rules (which will not work) before you have even met in person? This may sound cold but at 21 you are way too young to waste time on someone who lacks the tools to be happy and faces a false dillemma created by their upbringing. Now, once youre 40, divorced, and your spirit animal is Pall Malls youll be ready to help someone make a no-win decision of lifelong regret with confidence.
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Aug 20, 2018 06:50
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Beachcomber posted:I knew this would come in handy I lost it at the reveal that he's calvin.
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Aug 20, 2018 07:46
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My sister (37,f) asked me to give my (39,m) childhood toys to her children.quote:u/markon22 Denial is a river in Egypt.
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Aug 20, 2018 08:53
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quote:I [27f] despise being a mother and wish I would have given them up for adoption. No one knows and I hate myself for it.Personal issues This is tough, women can go through this even with a partner there to support them, must be so much worse if you are a single mom.
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Aug 20, 2018 11:25
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Shnag posted:This is tough, women can go through this even with a partner there to support them, must be so much worse if you are a single mom. There should be a series of PSAs for young women about why they shouldn't let garbage people stick their dicks in them. "Sure, he may drive a tricked out El Camino, but do you want to be raising this rear end in a top hat's kids at 23 when he's moved on to the next dumb as poo poo teenager?"
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Aug 20, 2018 11:32
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Shnag posted:This is tough, women can go through this even with a partner there to support them, must be so much worse if you are a single mom. I used to love dating single moms when I was younger, especially ones that I could tell wished they still had the freedoms of not having had kids. They always put so much effort into the relationship. Freaks ya out tho when they tell you how much they love you and how awesome you are after your first PIV lay.
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Aug 20, 2018 11:44
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My Imaginary GF posted:Like most issues pertaining to Federally-recognized Indian tribes, the answer is usually 'it depends.' I'll have to look at my notes for an article I was writing a couple years back on tribal disenrollment, however, from what I recall off the top of my head, the tl;dr of blood quantum is that its a legacy policy issue which impacts present tribes and individuals in as many ways as there are Federally recognized tribes. You know, I realize Native Americans have had a rough go at it in the past with regards to people trying to forcibly convert their culture, but those are some straight up 1930s Germany racial policies. If they think these girls can't be part of their culture because of their skin color they're some hosed up racists.
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Aug 20, 2018 11:46
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quote:My [26/f] partner [39/m] is in a psychiatric hospital. I feel guilty, confused, heartbroken. Don't know what to do]My spouse (we legalized our relationship literally 3 weeks ago) has been unstable for years. He has bipolar disorder and has been on and off of his medication for a long time. Drinking heavily, not taking it seriously, and basically not looking after himself.
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Aug 20, 2018 13:24
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Darkhold posted:Well he's 13 years older and going to murder me one day. I'm sure making him stop drinking and be on his meds is something I can handle.  Isn't this one of those circumstances where you can annul a marriage? Just go to whoever officiated and show them some kind of psych eval, leave and never ever look back. One thing that stuck out was that he was expecting to host his daughter from a previous marriage, and her issue wasn't that it was unsafe for her, but how they needed to settle him down, rather than warn the ex!
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Aug 20, 2018 13:28
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Philonius posted:You know, I realize Native Americans have had a rough go at it in the past with regards to people trying to forcibly convert their culture, but those are some straight up 1930s Germany racial policies. If they think these girls can't be part of their culture because of their skin color they're some hosed up racists. It could be worse. Those girls could have been enrolled members of the tribe; a family switches allegiances and a new factional majority on the tribal council is elected; the swing kingroup has a dislike for the girls and sends an anonymous letter to the enrollment committee questioning their blood quantum; the newly appointed members of the enrollment board send a letter alerting the girls that their eligability for enrollment is under scrutinization and they are required to submit acceptable documentation and appear before the enrollment committee. Enrollment committees, having been delegated broad authority, may often have the power of interpretation over documentation. So if you submit documentation that shows you meet the eligability requirements, the enrollment committee often has the authority to be all 'Truth isn't truth' and determine that the 2+2=5 so therefore you fail to pass muster and are disenrolled. This often occurs when there are direct political or financial stakes from enrollment/disenrollment in a tribe. Tribal governance be hosed up, yo. Republicans shout about how much they want no taxes and how much government bureaucrats overreach - you wanna see the form of government that'd be achieved without a deep state and no taxes, look no further than tribes. Sounds hyperbolic? Think again! I've interviewed folk in that piece, sovereignty without responsibility and incentives for exclusionary politics is poo poo. e:grammar My Imaginary GF fucked around with this message at 13:55 on Aug 20, 2018 |
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Aug 20, 2018 13:48
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Absurd Alhazred posted:Way too many prominent Jews think this way, too, unfortunately. See the new Jewish Agency chief. Probably a bit tougher in native societies since there might not be as straightforward a conversion path? The weirdest thing about this kind of stuff is that I'm pretty sure the majority of Jews I know are half-breeds of one sort or other anyway (notably including myself)
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Aug 20, 2018 13:54
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My (21F) ex (21M) made me feel like my body count lessened my value and worth and I don’t know how to deal with these feelings of worthlessness and fear of never finding someone who’d want to be with me because of itquote:Throwaway because this is kind of embarrassing for me. Mods namechange to unculttered pussy plz
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Aug 20, 2018 13:57
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La Brea Carpet posted:My (21F) ex (21M) made me feel like my body count lessened my value and worth and I don’t know how to deal with these feelings of worthlessness and fear of never finding someone who’d want to be with me because of it Nobody of any merit cares how many past partners you had. But I will judge you on dating this idiot, OP. Because that was a bad call.
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Aug 20, 2018 14:07
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just clean out the change and old receipts in there!
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Aug 20, 2018 14:21
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Absurd Alhazred posted:Nobody of any merit cares how many past partners you had. But I will judge you on dating this idiot, OP. Because that was a bad call. She didnt just date him; she agreed to an open relationship, he still managed to cheat on her, admitted it, then she took him back. The 36 year old creeps of reddit assuredly are in a race currently to track her down.
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Aug 20, 2018 14:23
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quote:Me (20m) and my girlfriend (20f) have been dating for over a year and haven't had sex. Am I a dick for wanting to break up with her over it? Most people would call that a friendship. Have you considered marrying her in hopes it will jump start her libido?
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Aug 20, 2018 14:49
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I do some work with the Lakota community and I have absolutely no idea which people are considered insiders or outsiders. They've politely explained it to me several times now, and it's just totally impenetrable to me - I'm a light skinned Argentine Israeli American, so pretty used to hopping in between cultures. It seems like some people can be official members of the tribe but still be considered outsiders, and then there are some actual outsiders (a white woman who married a Lakota man and moved to the rez and stayed when her husband passed away) who are considered insiders for some purposes. But I probably didn't totally grasp it.
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Aug 20, 2018 15:09
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Xenocides posted:Most people would call that a friendship. Have you considered marrying her in hopes it will jump start her libido? Youre doing a sexless long distance relationship at 20, your brain is just as broken as hers
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Aug 20, 2018 15:12
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