- Krabboss
- Nov 11, 2016
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MY HUSBAND'S PARSE IS BETTER THAN YOURS
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This guy needs to be kept away from women because he is very clearly going to hurt somebody some day. He's broken and very likely can't be fixed.
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Jan 9, 2019 18:16
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 31, 2024 09:55
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- LadyPictureShow
- Nov 18, 2005
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Success!
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I was looking for a different crazy story about a prenup, but this couldn't be passed up.
I [32M] need to apologize to my ex fiance [33F] for some messages my friend [33M] sent using my phone.
quote:
My ex and I were together for 6 years and we broke up 3 years ago. She's a teacher and I own my own business. I make about 3x what she does and I also inherited a fair chunk of money from my grandfather.
I proposed to her and she accepted, everything was going really well until the topic of prenups came up. My parents were also concerned that I get a prenup too and I agreed.
She basically refused to sign one saying that she didn't believe in them and that we were a partnership and that we should share everything.
I told her that was easy for her to say since she had less to lose than me in a divorce. We argued for days about it and I finally told her that I couldn't marry without a prenup. She told me she wouldn't marry me with one.
I called the engagement off, thinking that maybe she'd see reason but she said "fine" and just handed me my ring back, packed her things up and moved out.
I offered her a compromise- that if we had kids the prenup would be void or after 10 years the prenup would be void. She wasn't having any of it and basically told me that she's couldn't live her married life being under the suspicion that she was a gold digger and she basically told me never to contact her again and I took her off my social media/vice versa.
I haven't really gotten over her, I feel like we were perfect and I regret pushing the prenup thing now immensely. My business doesn't leave much time for dating and even when I have, I seem run women who expect me to pay for everything. I've also been a bit depressed and just lonely in general.
Anyway I found out through the grapevine that she's been in a relationship for 2.5 years now (I guess she moved on pretty quickly), got engaged a few months ago and recently posted a pregnancy announcement. I made the horrible mistake of looking her up on FB and she looks really happy with her new fiance.
I went over to a friend's house that night, we both got drunk and I passed out. At some point during the night my friend messaged her fiance on FB using my phone saying that she was a gold digger and that she got dumped for not signing a pre nup.
The fiance basically wrote back he didn't need a prenup when it came to the mother of his child. My friend then messaged him telling him to get a paternity test.
He got worse, going on about how her fiance was probably raising a kid that wasn't his because he's a beta (not sure what that means exactly) and that I was banging hot chicks every night and didn't need someone who was a 3/10 at best and how he was marrying a bitch.
Her fiance replied saying that it looked like money couldn't buy class or turn me into a real man and blocked me.
Apparently he's taken screenshots and sent them to her. She's gone and posted the screenshots on her page stating if I tried to contact her through other people, please beware and to not pass on any contact info or talk about the wedding/baby with me.
People have commented on what I loser I am for not moving on after 3 years and how money can't buy happiness. People also commented on how creepy it was that (I) had messaged her fiance. The post is public to boot and she hasn't blocked my name out or anything and I don't know if people have reshared it.
I'm absolutely furious at my friend and completely humiliated. There's heaps of mutual acquaintances, people I went to uni with, people I see on a regular basis responding with emojis or comments.
I've also had messages from mutual acquaintances and friends asking me what possessed me to even send such nasty messages or calling me a loser and telling me to stay away from my ex or comments about how even if her fiance didn't make as much money as me, he was 10 times the man I was.
Even my parents/siblings found out and were concerned at what I had done until I explained that it was my friend.
How do I deal with this? I feel like even if I said that my friend did it, I am going to look like even more of a loser. My friend has apologized for what he did but doesn't think he's done anything wrong and that I'm an idiot for being too nice and being hung up o this girl.
tl;dr: How the hell do I handle this? I'm damned either way and I'd like to try and restore my reputation a little. Do I explain? Do I delete FB?
Sure... your friend did that...
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Jan 9, 2019 18:27
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- tactlessbastard
- Feb 4, 2001
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Godspeed, post
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Fun Shoe
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I was looking for a different crazy story about a prenup, but this couldn't be passed up.
I [32M] need to apologize to my ex fiance [33F] for some messages my friend [33M] sent using my phone.
Sure... your friend did that...
Any good friend has an inventory of your deepest, most loathsome reptile feelings and is there for you when you need them expressed!
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Jan 9, 2019 18:33
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- Leon Einstein
- Feb 6, 2012
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I must win every thread in GBS. I don't care how much banal semantic quibbling and shitty posts it takes.
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My dad dated a woman that made it clear on their first date that a prenup was a dealbreaker. My dad, being the idiot that he is when it comes to getting laid, dated her for years. She was a golddigger with fading looks and she was desperate as gently caress. She would manipulate him by breaking down in tears because he had sex with other women before her. He was like 55 at the time.
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Jan 9, 2019 18:43
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- Haifisch
- Nov 13, 2010
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Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!
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Taco Defender
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Can my landlord fine me/withhold security deposit for not doing chores? (Maine)
quote:My landlord has a clause in the rental agreement stating that the tenant must do 30 minutes of chores daily. This wasn't a problem for me until recently, when I left the state for a couple days. I got a text from the landlord saying that I needed to do my chores or I would be fined $15 per hour of chores not done. This seemed unreasonable to me since I wasn't occupying the property, but I looked back in the agreement, and in the agreement it says I can be fined $15 an hour for missed chores, or for chores that are not documented.
I'm supposed to write down every time I do a chore in a calendar, but the calendar is really confusing (it is for 2014 or something, so all the dates are wrong), and I have done several days of chores that I didn't record. I am worried that at the end of the lease the landlord will take the book, find every day that I didn't write down, and take a chunk of my deposit. Would that be legal? If so what should I do to minimize what I can be fined for? OP posted:lmao tbh i get an empty nester vibe, its a weird situation where im renting a room in the house, and the landlords (married couple) are living in it as well. do you have any idea about the legality of that clause/me getting fined?
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Jan 9, 2019 18:51
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- Streak
- May 16, 2004
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by Nyc_Tattoo
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This guy needs to be kept away from women because he is very clearly going to hurt somebody some day. He's broken and very likely can't be fixed.
holy yikes
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Jan 9, 2019 19:06
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- Salty Josh
- Jul 13, 2016
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Sometimes there's so much beauty in the world, I feel like I can't take it, and my heart is just going to cave in.
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Nap Ghost
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My dad dated a woman that made it clear on their first date that a prenup was a dealbreaker. My dad, being the idiot that he is when it comes to getting laid, dated her for years. She was a golddigger with fading looks and she was desperate as gently caress. She would manipulate him by breaking down in tears because he had sex with other women before her. He was like 55 at the time.
So it was a retread?
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Jan 9, 2019 19:08
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- PHIZ KALIFA
- Dec 21, 2011
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#mood
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Like honestly personally knowing how academics tend to use citations I would almost say including a bunch of sources is almost irrelevant unless you're directly quoting things from them. It's super common for people to just play a game of publication telephone and site stuff only tangentially related to their point while hoping no one is gonna bother actually combing all the citations to verify the ideas and results are really that comparable to what the person is mentioning. Most papers are gonna have dozens of citations but realistically if you care about that specific topic enough to pull them cause you're looking for something to help your own research you'll find that maybe somewhere between a couple and a few actually feel relevant, and that's if you're lucky.
If I recall correctly, isn't this how the "doctors invented vibrators cuz they were tired of fingerbanging victorian era high society ladies" myth got started? Back in like 1999 a lady wrote a book citing a German language paper on that fact and for like 15 years it was just repeated verbatim until someone checked the source and realized that it was just utterly unsupported by the facts.
Here's a source of the counterpoints. I love poo poo like this because it shows how malleable our understanding of history is at any given time. Granted I was not having sex in 1999 but that idea is just so widely accepted and repeated that I was shocked to learn how recent it was!
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Jan 9, 2019 20:13
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- Renegret
- May 26, 2007
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THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.
YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*
Cat Army Sworn Enemy
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AITA for telling my wife that being pregnant doesn’t mean you get to be lazy?
quote:Some background:
We are both 32. And we are both physicians. I work a lot (currently 55-60 hours a week on average) and am an attending physician. My wife is still finishing her fellowship training. But her fellowship is outpatient based and her hours are great. Maybe 30 hours a week she is in clinic.
Now we are currently expecting our first child and naturally we’re very excited. I want to support my wife as much as possible...but ever since we found out we were expecting, she has suddenly become very different. She lost interest in work, we had recent fights about her wanting to quit medicine and stop working entirely to focus on caring for the kid. She no longer helps out around the home. I have to do all the laundry, cooking, dishwashing, trash, bathroom cleaning because she says she is tired all the time. It’s not that she is physically confining herself at home because she is feeling fatigued, she is often still out and about either hanging out with her co-fellows and girlfriends or sits at home watching TV.
Finally...I blew up at her yesterday when she didn’t go out to pick up some groceries when I asked her to prior to leaving for work. I yelled at her that being pregnant does not automatically make you disabled and unable to do anything. Maybe I was also still upset she had blown $1200 on a ridiculous Uppababy stroller without checking with me first last week (for context, I make at least $550k a year at my current working hours, she makes about 60k as a fellow) because I feel like I’m the one shouldering 90% of that expense. In any case, she got pissed off gave me the silent treatment since yesterday, am I the complete dick here for saying that or what?
nah dude I think you're being pretty reasonable
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Jan 9, 2019 20:23
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- Smirking_Serpent
- Aug 27, 2009
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i mean if i had that kind of money i would buy my pregnant wife a custom pregnancy gundam
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Jan 9, 2019 20:26
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- AnimeIsTrash
- Jun 30, 2018
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AITA for dumping my gf after her unannounced backpacking trip
quote:
Ok so this happened maybe three days ago, but first some context.
Me and my (now ex) girlfriend of 3 years lived in a 2 bedroom apartment which I pay for by myself, as I make enough money to afford it and I didn’t want to trouble her by pressing her with a bill for a place that is a tiny bit out of her price range, instead we use a meter and pay the bill through my account, with her compensating her spend.
We also have always been big on trust since both of us have been cheated on in previous relationships, and didn’t want to go through that again in this one.
The fact that I pay solely this apartment is important as it allows her to spend her money on things like more expensive gifts and the occasional excursion for us (which of course I pay in part for). Also the fact that we are big on trust means we tell eachother A lot about our lives and future plans.
Anyways, she was always a fan of these trips abroad and loved travelling, and for the most part our trips were always fun. However, about three days ago she announced that she had bought tickets for a solo backpacking trip across South America which she was going to go on on Friday, and that she had been planning this for months.
First I asked if I could come, to which she said no because she would be “discovering herself” on this trip, and when I asked why hadn’t she told me she said because I wouldn’t have allowed (or at the very least not wanted) her to go, especially alone. (Which is mostly true)
Well an argument ensued and at some point I finally put my foot down, it went something like this:
Gf: “why can’t I just go explore the world and live life to its fullest”
Me: “you can, without me or the security of my home, pack your bags and get out”
I believe it was the right thing to do as she didn’t pay for the apartment anyways, and so didn’t have any right to demand to stay, plus I was willing to give her money for a hotel for a week, which she refused.
That night she went to her parents home an hour away and my phone was blown up with people calling me a controlling rear end in a top hat and the like, my question is am I really an rear end in a top hat for this?
TLDR: girlfriend popped a surprise solo trip on me 5 days before she left, saying she wanted to go alone and had been planning it for months, I kicked her out my house.
Some of the comments in the thread are also 
quote:
NTA. “Finding herself” on a solo backpacking trip likely includes sleeping around. I’m an American living in South America and I’ve seen it quite a bit with foreigners here.
Also, she’s able to pay for this trip by living off your paycheck, basically. She lived in a free, to her, apartment and you partially financially funded other trips.
At the very least, she should have told you what she was planning. Springing this on you by surprise is a very large red flag.
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Jan 9, 2019 20:30
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- Leon Einstein
- Feb 6, 2012
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I must win every thread in GBS. I don't care how much banal semantic quibbling and shitty posts it takes.
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How can you feel bad for a couple making 600k a year? gently caress them and their "problems". Hire a maid ffs.
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Jan 9, 2019 20:31
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- Midnight Voyager
- Jul 2, 2008
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Lipstick Apathy
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"Lesbians are hot, so it makes sense to have them in your game. But I'm a straight guy, so putting a gay guy in your game means it's not 100% specifically intended for me! And the only reason you'd do that is pandering!"
They'll never put it in those exact words, but that's the thought process behind these fuckwits.
No, some of them will put it in those words. They already have. You underestimate them!
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Jan 9, 2019 20:40
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- tactlessbastard
- Feb 4, 2001
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Godspeed, post
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Fun Shoe
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AITA for telling my wife that being pregnant doesn’t mean you get to be lazy?
nah dude I think you're being pretty reasonable
If you think pregnancy is rough your gonna really enjoy her as a mother
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Jan 9, 2019 20:46
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- Dunning Krugerrand
- Dec 23, 2015
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purestrain pyrite
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AITA for very rarely/almost never wanting to go to restaurants because my girlfriend makes food that's just as good, if not better, than restaurant food?
quote:I've been with my wonderful girlfriend for a few years now, and we usually get along great, aside from this current issue. You can skip to the TL;DR if the exposition is too long.
She's a self-proclaimed "foodie", which I honestly think is just selling herself short - she's a food genius. She can taste and smell a dish and then turn around and recreate it, or even make it better than the original.
If you taste something and wonder, 'what's that super subtle flavor?' she'll tell you, 'it's anchovy paste/sumac/lavender/some other obscure spice that you would never think of.' When someone is cooking something and they go, 'it's missing something,' she can tell you exactly what it needs.
(It doesn't stop there, she knew I had touched a diesel truck at work one morning as soon as I walked into the house that night because she could somehow smell it on me. It's either really cool or really creepy, depending on the day.)
That's not it, either. She heard about a lost family recipe and the next week, BAM, I'm eating my grandmother's homemade sausage again for the first time in fifteen years.
It's gotten to the point where I don't see any point in going out to eat, pretty much ever, except maybe her birthday. Even the most exotic ingredients aren't out of her reach, either, and, even though it's not about cost, I've saved up more being with her than I ever had in any other relationship. The only places we really go for date night is ramen - she can't figure out how to make the noodles, but she still tries so it's just a matter of time - and sushi.
Our anniversary was recently, and I had noticed that our local fish counter was selling sushi grade fish, along with the rolling mats and nori, so I suggested that we have homemade sushi for our anniversary dinner before going out and she upset and said, "I'm not learning how to make sushi because then I'll never get a real date ever again." We ended up going out instead.
It kinda took me by surprise that she got so mad, though. She's lightly mentioned wanting to go out occasionally to places like Olive Garden "because she likes the red sauce" or other places because she likes the food, and now that I'm thinking about it, she's gotten kinda gloomy because I've asked her to cook on date nights instead of going out more often.
She also brought up that food she cooks tastes better to me because she's tasting and smelling it while it cooks so her senses are dulled by the time it's served, but she has the most acute sense of smell/taste I've ever seen so I kinda think it's just an excuse.
I just don't think it's worth it to go out and pay restaurant food prices when we can stay home for home food prices and have food that's just as excellent.
TL;DR: So, Reddit, am I the rear end in a top hat for not wanting to pay a restaurant to cook my meals because I practically have a private chef of my very own?
Edit: it's not about the financial aspect of staying home vs going out, I just thought that it was worth mentioning because it's been more of a saving than expected.
Edit 2: I'm taking her out tonight to grovel, guys. I'm also going to politely ask that, if she finds this off of Twitter, please don't smother me in my sleep for being such a dick
Edit3: no, twitter, I don't buy her flowers, thanks for rubbing it in. I buy her herbs and succulents. What flowers do I buy a woman who likes to preserve them afterward?
Also, yes, I wash the dishes
Final Edit:
Okay guys. This will probably be my last edit. This post exploded unexpectedly and I've tried to respond to as many comments as I can, but there's just too many of you. If you've asked me a direct question and I haven't answered, I'm sorry. My inbox is a mess.
I really took everything you guys gave said to heart, and I can honestly say that I've been an rear end, and it's really hurt my relationship with my girlfriend. It's honestly a surprise that she's still my girlfriend after everything.
So her mom picked up the girls and I took her out to a really nice tapas restaurant. She was very excited and seemed to enjoy herself, and I apologized for being stupid. After, we took a walk and everything seemed perfect, so I asked her to marry me.
She said no. She did it kindly, but she still said no. She said that it wasn't a no forever, but she didn't want to commit to a one sided relationship and also said she doesn't think that it's fair that our relationship happens on 'my schedule' or 'my terms'.
I'm pretty heartbroken. I thought everything was pretty okay between us, but she thinks we should go to pre-marital (pre-engagement?) counseling and the division of labor needs to change over a serious sit down conversation.
So, Reddit, you were all right. I'm the rear end in a top hat who almost lost the love of my life, and most of you were right - it wasn't over restaurants.
I wanted to bold the good parts but it ended up being almost half of the post so just read the whole thing, it's worth it.
Bonus in the comments- she runs her own business from home and also takes care of their kid full time as well as his child from a previous relationship.
Dunning Krugerrand fucked around with this message at 20:58 on Jan 9, 2019
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Jan 9, 2019 20:53
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- Leon Einstein
- Feb 6, 2012
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I must win every thread in GBS. I don't care how much banal semantic quibbling and shitty posts it takes.
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Fake. What kind of foodie savant with a genius palate wants to go to Olive Garden?
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Jan 9, 2019 20:58
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- LadyPictureShow
- Nov 18, 2005
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Success!
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Dang, this one brings me back to that guy that was calling his kid's birth mom a 'deadbeat' and wanted courts to force her to take shared custody because he harangued her into keeping the pregnancy and being a single dad was soooooooo hard.
WIBTA for putting my two year old son up for adoption?
quote:
TLDR at the bottom
So on the spring of 2016 I found out that my college girlfriend got pregnant. She wanted to have an abortion but as a christian I felt that this was against my beliefs (btw I’m not pro-life, I feel like the option to abort should be there for people that don’t believe what I do but this is what I thought was right for my child). I was graduating that year and already had a pretty well-paying job lined up so I felt that I could provide for my kid. In the end me and my girlfriend came to the agreement that the baby be born but that I would be a single parent since she did not want to have a baby this young. That fall the baby was born and after that she moved back to her home state (she went out of state for college) and I got my son. At the time me and my girlfriend were 21.
Fast forward two years and I just feel so tired and secluded from the world. My only friend is my son, between work and him I have no free time. All I do on my free time is go to the park with him, watch kids shows etc. My mom live kinda far away but she visits every few months and lets me have some alone time but it’s not enough. Also I basically have the same job I had when I graduated college with a slight salary increase, I have not been able to take any initiatives at work to qualify me for a promotion due to my parent responsibilities and a lot of people that started after me outrank me now. And I can’t date, like who wants a 23 year old guy with a kid.
I just feel unfulfilled and alone and it has started to take it’s form in a little bit of animosity against my son and I never want that to happen. I want to be a great dad that loves his kid but I don’t think I can be that, I’ve tried for two years. You always hear about this undying love you’ll have for your kid but I just never had that.
So WIBTA for putting my son up for adoption? I would have to make sure he actually get’s adopted into a stable family like I grew up in and not into a foster home (don’t know how I would go about that though). The thing that makes me think that I am an rear end in a top hat is that he has started to form an attachment to me and that it would be unfair on him to leave him and unfair on his grandmother that also has a good connection with him. But what makes me think I’m not an rear end in a top hat is that I think that his childhood would just get worse the more lonely and unfulfilled I feel and that he’s better off with a more stable family. Please give me your perspective.
TLDR: I am a single dad that feels like he’s personal life is interfering with his ability to be a father, WIBTA to put up my two year old for adoption?
EDIT: Throwaway acc for obvious reasons
EDIT: I feel like people are answering the question AITA for having a kid and then regretting my choice which I believe the entire world would agree that ITA, but I’m asking if in my current situation, as the rear end in a top hat I am, WIBTA to put up my son for adoption now?
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Jan 9, 2019 21:05
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- Patrick Spens
- Jul 21, 2006
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"Every quarterback says they've got guts, But how many have actually seen 'em?"
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Pillbug
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While dumping her for that bullshit is totally fine, you shouldn't evict someone on no notice, even if they don't pay rent.
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Jan 9, 2019 21:10
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- the holy poopacy
- May 16, 2009
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hey! check this out
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Fun Shoe
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Fake. What kind of foodie savant with a genius palate wants to go to Olive Garden?
I have suspect her culinary skills are being exaggerated because the bf is just amazed by anything more impressive than microwaving pizza rolls.
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Jan 9, 2019 21:13
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- Leon Einstein
- Feb 6, 2012
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I must win every thread in GBS. I don't care how much banal semantic quibbling and shitty posts it takes.
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Just let her stay until she leaves for her trip. That's the easiest way to get out of it legally.
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Jan 9, 2019 21:19
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- jobson groeth
- May 17, 2018
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by FactsAreUseless
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AITA for very rarely/almost never wanting to go to restaurants because my girlfriend makes food that's just as good, if not better, than restaurant food?
I wanted to bold the good parts but it ended up being almost half of the post so just read the whole thing, it's worth it.
Bonus in the comments- she runs her own business from home and also takes care of their kid full time as well as his child from a previous relationship.
Fakepost. Redditors don't learn and grow. OP even looks like he realises he's going to have to work hard but he has a good thing and wants to keep it.
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Jan 9, 2019 21:29
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- DragQueenofAngmar
- Dec 29, 2009
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You shall not pass!
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[b] SO (23f) demands I (23m) stop watching porn and masturbating. I'm not sure I can.[/bi
quote:
My girlfriend and I have been together for 3 years. At one point we broke up and in the process of getting back together I was sleeping with someone else. We werent back together officially but it was clear she wanted to get back into an exclusive relationship. This happened over a year ago and she feels very betrayed. Because of this, about 4 months ago she asked me to stop masturbating and watching porn to help her deal with insecurity.
She did this for three reasons: First, I watched porn and masturbated almost every day (this didnt seem to affect my performance with her). Second, she felt that this is a sexual impulse that is out of my control and feels that if I am unable to control this kind of temptation I wont be able to control the temptation to cheat on her in the future. Third, she thinks it is childish and unattractive. I have stopped watching porn almost entirely but every now and then I still see semi nude photos.
I feel like it gets more difficult every day. She gives me sex almost every day, yet I feel extremely frustrated because I have a deep need to see other women's bodies every now and then. I don't want to lose this relationship over porn as that would be somewhat pathetic, but I don't know if I should continue promising something I have shown to be incapable of up to this point.
TL;DR: Girlfriend feels insecure for good reason and demands I stop watching porn and masturbating to ease her insecurity by showing I am capable of controlling my sexual impulses.
Btw: Her problem isnt about a lack in the sex we have. Our sex life has always been great with or without porn.
Edit: Thanks for all your responses. I do realize I have an addiction to porn and I am totally down to view it and masturbate less. When I say I feel a deep need to see other women's bodies I mean that I find it very hard not fantasizing about other women. My use of porn is about sexual release, but also about a need for variety. Im not sure if having her accept this need (allowing me to view porn every once in a while) is too much to ask.
porn is healthy, normal, Not addicting, and Just Fine
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Jan 9, 2019 22:27
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- Meme Emulator
- Oct 4, 2000
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AskHistorians is the best subreddit of them all, because random programmers who answer on the basis of the Wikipedia article they just read get their post removed.
Why arent they just hidden as a low voted post would be? Arent these people historians? Why are they deleting the record
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Jan 9, 2019 22:28
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- Leon Einstein
- Feb 6, 2012
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I must win every thread in GBS. I don't care how much banal semantic quibbling and shitty posts it takes.
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porn is healthy, normal, Not addicting, and Just Fine
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Jan 9, 2019 22:30
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- El_Elegante
- Jul 3, 2004
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by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
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Biscuit Hider
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Boyfriend (late 30sM) is being sexist in his professional life, how best should I (32F) confront this?
My boyfriend and I have been dating for nine months. He is a respected and very successful surgeon. He has a lot of publications and is highly regarded in his specialty. He's in his late 30s and in addition to being professionally successfully he is personally very nice and in good shape too. He's kind to his subordinates at work and is all around a great catch.
Recently, however though we were watching tv and a segment about the #MeToo backlash came up and he mentioned how he no longer lets female students shadow him or participate in his research because "false accusations are highly common" and "would destroy all his hard work". I was stunned in the moment and did not respond. He is normally a very progressive guy so I'm not sure what to do. How should I discuss this issue with him further?
tldr; boyfriend is being sexist in his medical practice, how should I confront it?
The New England Journal of Medicine published a very good article for this exact situation.
https://www.nejm.org/doi/full/10.1056/NEJMms1805743 for the curious
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Jan 9, 2019 22:32
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- blugu64
- Jul 17, 2006
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Do you realize that fluoridation is the most monstrously conceived and dangerous communist plot we have ever had to face?
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Can my landlord fine me/withhold security deposit for not doing chores? (Maine)
Does the lease state where the chores must be done, or what defines chores?
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Jan 9, 2019 22:38
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- kimbo305
- Jun 9, 2007
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actually, yeah, I am a little mad
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Non login version?
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Jan 9, 2019 22:39
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- El_Elegante
- Jul 3, 2004
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by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
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Biscuit Hider
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Pm me an email address, and I’ll email you a pdf.
Edit: link gone
El_Elegante fucked around with this message at 02:53 on Jan 10, 2019
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Jan 9, 2019 22:43
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- Haifisch
- Nov 13, 2010
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Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!
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Taco Defender
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Here's the most relevant paragraphs, since I'm not sure if we're allowed to quote an entire paywalled article:
quote:Academic institutions and health care organizations can implement strategies to help men move beyond fear and create an environment that supports mentorship opportunities. Such efforts include creating a “safe space” where men and women can talk directly about concerns regarding mentoring. An American College of Physicians position paper about gender equity in medicine makes recommendations that can support change.43 Recommendations for improving gender equity include being transparent in compensation arrangements; supporting universal access to family and medical leave policies; offering leadership-development programs and implicit-bias training; encouraging mentorship and sponsorship programs; and providing flexibility in structuring career paths in academic medicine, with flexible promotions and advancement criteria that reflect the range of responsibilities and unique contributions of female physicians. Among these recommendations, professional guidance and support that encourage self-reflection and address implicit biases toward women are particularly important, because it can be difficult to admit to bias and accept feedback that does not align with our perceptions of our private and professional selves.43,44 Tension between our actual and idealized identities can elicit strong negative emotions that we need to understand, process, and integrate, lest they lead to the very fear reactions that strategies for creating gender equity are trying to prevent.44
If fear is the lens through which potential mentors respond to and make sense of the world, then what is at stake for them on an individual level is the critical thinking, self-reflection, and empathy that are core aspects of the physician’s professional identity. On a broader level, characterizing men’s mentorship relationships with women as dangerous deepens institutional discrimination. If leaders and educators in academic medicine can examine these expressions of fear and find ways to move beyond them, our community will ultimately better support women’s career advancement.
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Jan 9, 2019 22:49
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 31, 2024 09:55
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- Yawgmoth
- Sep 10, 2003
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This post is cursed!
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Pm me an email address, and I’ll email you a pdf.
edit: I should refresh pages before hitting post.
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Jan 9, 2019 22:53
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Jan 9, 2019 18:16
Tater Love 
Cat Army 