Register a SA Forums Account here!
JOINING THE SA FORUMS WILL REMOVE THIS BIG AD, THE ANNOYING UNDERLINED ADS, AND STUPID INTERSTITIAL ADS!!!

You can: log in, read the tech support FAQ, or request your lost password. This dumb message (and those ads) will appear on every screen until you register! Get rid of this crap by registering your own SA Forums Account and joining roughly 150,000 Goons, for the one-time price of $9.95! We charge money because it costs us money per month for bills, and since we don't believe in showing ads to our users, we try to make the money back through forum registrations.
 
  • Post
  • Reply
Inspector Hound
Jul 14, 2003

pushpins posted:

Why are boomers doing this to us nothing has to be this way oh my loving god why are there no unions anymore

Unions? Are you a loving communist? You want public schools too?

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

DryGoods
Apr 26, 2014

Dogs, on the other hand, can connect with that pathos.

quote:

I had a first time client – we’ll call him Kevin. Kevin and I met via email and over the phone. He was single and worked in the hospitality industry. The first time I saw him in person was for our maiden Affection Spa Treatment. I was sort of nervous, and I think he was, too.

Kevin was a big-framed man – over six feet tall. With permission we gave each other a hug. He had to stoop down for the job. I found Kevin to be friendly with a great sense of humor. After some talk and a few opening cuddle positions, we decided to spoon. As the big spoon, Kevin was behind me. It was sweet to go from meeting this man for the very first time to spooning with him – in the course of less than an hour.

A few minutes went by and I could tell that Kevin had become physically aroused. To put it bluntly, Kevin had a boner. If you are someone with a penis – it’s possible that during the cuddle that you, like Kevin, may become a Boner Owner.

First, there’s nothing to be ashamed of. Boners happen. What matters most is what you do next. In the situation with Kevin, I chose to change positions and discuss it. I sat up and said, “Hey, Kevin, I noticed that you’re aroused.” (Yes, it’s an option to talk about it as plainly as that!)

Kevin said, “Yeah, I’m sorry.”

I said, “There’s nothing to be sorry about, let’s try something else.”

We came up with the idea of putting a pillow between us so that we were still spooning, but there was less contact between our mid-sections and genital areas. You can try this option as well. Kevin and I had a good laugh and talked about trademarking the technique and calling it “The Kevin.”

I hope that you get from this story that it was no big deal. We were just two grown up people talking about stuff that happens to bodies and making adjustments accordingly.

Scary!
Oct 22, 2012

by Nyc_Tattoo
Jeff Bezos putting all the mom and pop cuddlers out of business

Time to start a cuddling union

Salt Fish
Sep 11, 2003

Cybernetic Crumb

the kevin :(

FAUXTON
Jun 2, 2005

spero che tu stia bene


Yeah the event probably was where AMI tried to use the bezos beef album to spur a boardroom revolt against him at amazon.

Bert Roberge
Nov 28, 2003


DryGoods has trouble with "the Kevin" technique since it's his waifu bodypillow that's usually giving him a boner.

mormonpartyboat
Jan 14, 2015

by Reene

twoday posted:

He did help enact some changes to background checks in 2008. He was involved in gun control legislation, but always working to represent the NRA in the negotiations, and importantly keeping assault weapons bans off the table.

the assault weapon bans are dumb dogshit for idiot babies so thats a good thing, ty for your input

Scary!
Oct 22, 2012

by Nyc_Tattoo


Lmao

It’s good to see a professional in action

shovelbum
Oct 21, 2010

Fun Shoe
No one in an economically just society would be a professional cuddler, or need one

mormonpartyboat
Jan 14, 2015

by Reene
p dope to go googling for weirdass bulletpoints tho

Ben Nerevarine
Apr 14, 2006

DryGoods posted:

would you abort baby hitler?

Jeb:] Hell yeah I’d abort baby Hitler

Salt Fish
Sep 11, 2003

Cybernetic Crumb

shovelbum posted:

No one in an economically just society would be a professional cuddler, or need one

I'll give you 75 an hour

Happy Thread
Jul 10, 2005

by Fluffdaddy
Plaster Town Cop

Careful Drums posted:

facebook makes it as hard as possible for adblocks to block their ads and their solution is to send your computer tons of garbage, making your computer work way harder than it should to render a picture and some text

All the code shown in that picture is literally doing nothing but writing the word "Sponsors" somewhere on Facebook's page as it appears to you. But since ad block programs could easily scan for the word "Sponsors" and block anything near it, Facebook has opted to get around this by surrounding the word with a ton of garbage code inside the raw HTML they transmit to you. Specifically, they've separated each letter of "Sponsors" into its own division on the page and included a lot of fake letters to obfuscate what the real word is. An ad blocker trying to figure out what it says would have to perform a ton of work by rendering the entire page to figure out that it says "Sponsors" and not "SpsbsnsssS" or whatever, by taking into account which CSS classes are hidden content and which ones will actually show up.

So depending on if your ad block bothers or not, either they get around ad block and display their ad, or cause your page to load slow as poo poo. And either way they've inflated the size of the HTML file they sent you immensely with unnecessary garbage code which costs you longer page load times for no reason other than forcing you to not block ads they want to shove in your face

Good company

Happy Thread has issued a correction as of 05:09 on Feb 8, 2019

Bert Roberge
Nov 28, 2003

shovelbum posted:

No one in an economically just society would be a professional cuddler, or need one

Are cuddling jobs going to be easier or harder to get in your communist utopia?

DryGoods
Apr 26, 2014

Dogs, on the other hand, can connect with that pathos.

Bert Roberge posted:

DryGoods has trouble with "the Kevin" technique since it's his waifu bodypillow that's usually giving him a boner.

Bert Roberge
Nov 28, 2003


Ahh, the patented Shnorkevin technique.

Stefan Prodan
Jan 7, 2002

I deeply respect you as a human being... Some day I'm gonna make you *Mrs* Buck Turgidson!


Grimey Drawer
so did Al Saqr die for real, or what

has he just not posted in forever like anywhere

Inspector Hound
Jul 14, 2003

Dumb Lowtax posted:

The code is literally writing the word "Sponsors" somewhere on Facebook's page as it appears to you. But since ad block programs could easily scan for the word "Sponsors" and block anything near it, Facebook has opted to get around this by surrounding the word with a ton of garbage code inside the raw HTML they transmit to you. Specifically, they've separated each letter of "Sponsors" into its own division on the page and included a lot of fake letters to obfuscate what the real word is. An ad blocker trying to figure out what it says would have to perform a ton of work by rendering the entire page to figure out that it says "Sponsors" and not "SpsbsnsssS" or whatever, by taking into account which CSS classes are hidden content and which ones will actually show up.

So either they get around ad block and display their ad, or cause your page to load slow as poo poo. And either way they've inflated the size of the HTML file they sent you immensely with unnecessary garbage code which costs you longer page load times for no reason other than forcing you to not block ads they want to shove in your face

Good company

we run ads

shovelbum
Oct 21, 2010

Fun Shoe

Bert Roberge posted:

Are cuddling jobs going to be easier or harder to get in your communist utopia?

Ppl would have genuine and nontransactional relationships including cuddling op

Intel&Sebastian
Oct 20, 2002

colonel...
i'm trying to sneak around
but i'm dummy thicc
and the clap of my ass cheeks
keeps alerting the guards!

F

:patriot: :911: :patriot:

Squizzle
Apr 24, 2008




PostEldar posted:

all this talk of dearly departed posters made me want to stop lurking for a second and say I love you all and miss you when you go

post more friendo, cspam flourishes best when it is a chorus of many voices!!!

Squizzle
Apr 24, 2008




Inspector Hound posted:

Unions? Are you a loving communist? You want public schools too?

unions are more syndicalist tho??????

mormonpartyboat
Jan 14, 2015

by Reene
i sometimes wonder what would have happened if people went for actual substantial gun control in any shape or form instead of jacking off about the ~assault weapons ban~ for literal decades and acting like sating white people's fears with security theater was the entirety of the government's responsibility

Bert Roberge
Nov 28, 2003

shovelbum posted:

Ppl would have genuine and nontransactional relationships including cuddling op

Squizzle
Apr 24, 2008




Inspector Hound
Jul 14, 2003

Squizzle posted:

unions are more syndicalist tho??????

Waaay harder to spell


That was an interesting Wikipedia skim though what book should I read

sexpig by night
Sep 8, 2011

by Azathoth

you run AIDS now bitch

JHomer722
Jul 30, 2006

And you, you ridiculous people, you expect me to help you.


i hope he strokes out or gets committed

ded redd
Aug 1, 2010

by Fluffdaddy

Stefan Prodan posted:

so did Al Saqr die for real, or what

has he just not posted in forever like anywhere

there is no way anyone here is ever going to know

MadJackal
Apr 30, 2004

Waffle House posted:

Does anyone have that gif of the T pounding right through the P-Hole

twoday
May 4, 2005



C-SPAM Times best-selling author

mormonpartyboat posted:

the assault weapon bans are dumb dogshit for idiot babies so thats a good thing, ty for your input

Hmmm I guess that's true too

a.lo
Sep 12, 2009

shovelbum
Oct 21, 2010

Fun Shoe

mormonpartyboat posted:

i sometimes wonder what would have happened if people went for actual substantial gun control in any shape or form instead of jacking off about the ~assault weapons ban~ for literal decades and acting like sating white people's fears with security theater was the entirety of the government's responsibility

The terrorist factions committing gun massacres have substantial state backing both domestic and foreign op they use the civilian market bc it's a convenient option not bc it's the only one they have

Stefan Prodan
Jan 7, 2002

I deeply respect you as a human being... Some day I'm gonna make you *Mrs* Buck Turgidson!


Grimey Drawer

Office Pig posted:

there is no way anyone here is ever going to know

well we can't know if he did die but it's pretty to know if he didn't, if someone goes "oh I saw him posting in the anime forum" or some poo poo

DryGoods
Apr 26, 2014

Dogs, on the other hand, can connect with that pathos.

PostEldar posted:

all this talk of dearly departed posters made me want to stop lurking for a second and say I love you all and miss you when you go

now's your time to shine. you broke the silence so just start posting more and more. soon you'll be a beloved regular and then get run out of cspam after you accidentally post your weird dream journal about Rudy Giuliani hand feeding you macaroni and cheese and you just get so bitter that you spend weeks buying the rest of us avs that are just like our old ones but have cheese sauce smeared on their mouth and we start getting a little freaked out as you become the phantom of cspam and hunt us to our virtual deaths

ded redd
Aug 1, 2010

by Fluffdaddy

Stefan Prodan posted:

well we can't know if he did die but it's pretty to know if he didn't, if someone goes "oh I saw him posting in the anime forum" or some poo poo

you can hope he managed to get out before poo poo went sideways but the more likely best case scenario is a caro-style miracle in defiance of rational odds at the expense of horrible saudi-inflicted suffering

mormonpartyboat
Jan 14, 2015

by Reene

PostEldar posted:

all this talk of dearly departed posters made me want to stop lurking for a second and say I love you all and miss you when you go

:justpost:

death is certain, and u cant post when ur dead

Xaris
Jul 25, 2006

Lucky there's a family guy
Lucky there's a man who positively can do
All the things that make us
Laugh and cry

PostEldar posted:

all this talk of dearly departed posters made me want to stop lurking for a second and say I love you all and miss you when you go

tonald dump is president and mama fort is a crime printing machine

nothing matters

:justpost: and post some more bc we are all dead and America is a failed state run by rich oligarchy

might as well get some trumps n lols in before the elite come for you and suck your blood out to maintain their vitality

ded redd
Aug 1, 2010

by Fluffdaddy
i mean it's not like saudi murders are particularly renowned for their competency

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

pushpins
Sep 11, 2006


Title text (optional; no images are allowed, only text)
Professional Cuddler: I need to do this to make rent

Me: Shhhhhh

  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
  • Post
  • Reply