SA's Greatest Sagas: careful that's a load-bearing slur

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Hauki: May 11, 2010

Snow Cone Capone posted:

A gentle reminder that BeatMastrJ also tried selling $30 ankle socks on SA-Mart that were also approved

https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3871254

lmao holy poo poo

I�m dying

# ? Feb 28, 2019 17:58

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# ? May 18, 2024 03:54

bring back old gbs: Feb 28, 2007; by LITERALLY AN ADMIN

ya i lost my poo poo in the DIY thread when someone posted the lady sock thread. I remember seeing the SAMart thread get mocked before but to find out its the same guy as the lovely bathroom is such a huge italian finger kiss i cant even do it with my normal human sized hands

# ? Feb 28, 2019 17:59

Fleta Mcgurn: Oct 5, 2003; Porpoise noise continues.

Like, the worst part for me is that not only are they stupid-looking, not only does the Bedazzling detract from the purported point of the product, but they've been a thing in East Asia for at least a decade and they cost about three USD equivalent AT MOST.

It's like "inventing" the Slap Chop, except now it has a rubber safety guard making it unable to cut properly.

# ? Feb 28, 2019 18:04

Snow Cone Capone: Jul 31, 2003

Fleta Mcgurn posted:

Like, the worst part for me is that not only are they stupid-looking, not only does the Bedazzling detract from the purported point of the product, but they've been a thing in East Asia for at least a decade and they cost about three USD equivalent AT MOST.

It's like "inventing" the Slap Chop, except now it has a rubber safety guard making it unable to cut properly.

but SWAROVSKI CRYSTALS

# ? Feb 28, 2019 18:09

Snow Cone Capone: Jul 31, 2003

bring back old gbs posted:

ya i lost my poo poo in the DIY thread when someone posted the lady sock thread. I remember seeing the SAMart thread get mocked before but to find out its the same guy as the lovely bathroom is such a huge italian finger kiss i cant even do it with my normal human sized hands

not enough people were lolling in the DIY thread so I also posted it here. I actually had to recreate the OP because it's an archived thread and I can't quote it directly. YOU'RE WELCOME

# ? Feb 28, 2019 18:09

Hauki: May 11, 2010

Snow Cone Capone posted:

but SWAROVSKI CRYSTALS

can I charge the socks the same way I charge my other crystals with my bros??

# ? Feb 28, 2019 18:11

Snow Cone Capone: Jul 31, 2003

Hauki posted:

can I charge the socks the same way I charge my other crystals with my bros??

Generally when choosing jizzrag socks I look for a pair that costs less than $30

# ? Feb 28, 2019 18:12

bring back old gbs: Feb 28, 2007; by LITERALLY AN ADMIN

Snow Cone Capone posted:

not enough people were lolling in the DIY thread so I also posted it here. I actually had to recreate the OP because it's an archived thread and I can't quote it directly. YOU'RE WELCOME

my man, you made the correct choice. that poo poo needs to get reposted everywhere. It's such an amazing turn of events

# ? Feb 28, 2019 18:15

waah: Jun 20, 2011; Better stay in line when
You see a Pavel like me shinin

Oh god those socks can't possibly survive more than 3 times in the wash before ripping right?

"Hey honey, remember those $30 socks you got me, the laundry monster ate them"

# ? Feb 28, 2019 18:19

Arivia: Mar 17, 2011

waah posted:

Oh god those socks can't possibly survive more than 3 times in the wash before ripping right?

"Hey honey, remember those $30 socks you got me, the laundry monster ate them"

Delicates like that either go in a bag to protect them or are hand-washed and hung to dry.

# ? Feb 28, 2019 18:24

Antivehicular: Dec 30, 2011; I wanna sing one for the cars
That are right now headed silent down the highway
And it's dark and there is nobody driving And something has got to give

Socks that are meant to simultaneously be hidden and get attention, because :females:

are complicated, amirite

# ? Feb 28, 2019 18:37

Who What Now: Sep 10, 2006; by Azathoth

Snow Cone Capone posted:

A gentle reminder that BeatMastrJ also tried selling $30 ankle socks on SA-Mart that were also approved

https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3871254

There is a true and loving God and beatmasterj is his dipshit disciple

# ? Feb 28, 2019 19:04

Dillbag: Mar 4, 2007; Click here to join Lem Lee in the Hell Of Being Cut To Pieces; Nap Ghost

Not since the return of Caro has the discussion in almost every single one of my bookmarked threads been taken over by the same incredible event. Truly a goon saga for the ages.

# ? Feb 28, 2019 19:13

EmmyOk: Aug 11, 2013

I've just read the first paragraph but why is he blinging out a shock whose whole purpose is to be unseen.

# ? Feb 28, 2019 19:19

Proteus Jones: Feb 28, 2013

Dillbag posted:

Not since the return of Caro has the discussion in almost every single one of my bookmarked threads been taken over by the same incredible event. Truly a goon saga for the ages.

It even showed up in the IT Goons Slack.

It really is a unifying event.

# ? Feb 28, 2019 19:20

JacquelineDempsey: Aug 6, 2008; Women's Circuit Bender Union Local 34

POOL IS CLOSED posted:

that bathroom is what happens when your entire personal aesthetic is informed by Minecraft and Oblivion. painfully naive, yet suffocatingly macho.

First thing that came to my mind was the original Sims. I got way into it, and me being Gothy McSpookypants at the time, I'd spend hours scouring Angelfire and Geocities Sims/goth webrings for skins of gothy furniture, clothes, hairstyles, etc. --- and of course just about anything I could find in black, blood red, purple, etc. I thought they were super cool designs and soooo dark and artsy and totally my gothic Barbie dream houses.

What I'm saying is, this bathroom is the "90's rotating flaming skull gif on your AOL page" of bathrooms.

# ? Feb 28, 2019 19:21

Proteus Jones: Feb 28, 2013

EmmyOk posted:

I've just read the first paragraph but why is he blinging out a shock whose whole purpose is to be unseen.

He thinks that when a couple buys a house, it's the woman that has the final say. So he decided this is the Platonic Ideal of a feminine bathroom.

# ? Feb 28, 2019 19:21

bradzilla: Oct 15, 2004

He also has no plans to actually sell the house.

# ? Feb 28, 2019 19:26

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

I wish I had that much free capital and time

# ? Feb 28, 2019 19:30

Proteus Jones: Feb 28, 2013

Hoshi posted:

I wish I had that much free capital and time

You gotta start selling socks, then.

# ? Feb 28, 2019 19:34

POOL IS CLOSED: Jul 14, 2011; I'm just exploding with mackerel. This is the aji wo kutta of my discontent.; Pillbug

JacquelineDempsey posted:

First thing that came to my mind was the original Sims. I got way into it, and me being Gothy McSpookypants at the time, I'd spend hours scouring Angelfire and Geocities Sims/goth webrings for skins of gothy furniture, clothes, hairstyles, etc. --- and of course just about anything I could find in black, blood red, purple, etc. I thought they were super cool designs and soooo dark and artsy and totally my gothic Barbie dream houses.

What I'm saying is, this bathroom is the "90's rotating flaming skull gif on your AOL page" of bathrooms.

I can see it. I probably would�ve been down for the color scheme in my gothy tween years, if not the rest of the terrible execution.

That tub just needs a little sharpening and then it could compete with a guillotine

# ? Feb 28, 2019 19:40

Midnight Voyager: Jul 2, 2008; Lipstick Apathy

I just realized, I 100% know this guy's aesthetic from this bathroom to the example pics for the hidden socks. Leopard print heels and swarovski crystal socks?

My babysitter when I was a kid lived in a trailer park. She had a waterbed and a velvet Elvis and even as a kid, I found everything she owned tacky as hell. Half her clothes were animal print and she had enormous hair. She would have eaten this poo poo up as faux rich and fancy and stylish.

# ? Feb 28, 2019 20:19

Snow Cone Capone: Jul 31, 2003

Midnight Voyager posted:

I just realized, I 100% know this guy's aesthetic from this bathroom to the example pics for the hidden socks. Leopard print heels and swarovski crystal socks?

My babysitter when I was a kid lived in a trailer park. She had a waterbed and a velvet Elvis and even as a kid, I found everything she owned tacky as hell. Half her clothes were animal print and she had enormous hair. She would have eaten this poo poo up as faux rich and fancy and stylish.

I think the term you're looking for is nouveau riche

# ? Feb 28, 2019 20:21

Vincent Van Goatse: Nov 8, 2006; Enjoy every sandwich.; Smellrose

Snow Cone Capone posted:

A gentle reminder that BeatMastrJ also tried selling $30 ankle socks on SA-Mart that were also approved

https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3871254

Is it possible to make a Kickstarter to fly Gordon Ramsey over specifically to punch this dude in the face?

# ? Feb 28, 2019 20:24

Midnight Voyager: Jul 2, 2008; Lipstick Apathy

Snow Cone Capone posted:

I think the term you're looking for is nouveau riche

I thought that implied someone who was poor but had come into money. I guess it's the same kind of style, but she still lived in a trailer park. The Velvis was the most expensive thing she owned.

# ? Feb 28, 2019 20:30

Ichabod Tane: Oct 30, 2005; A most notable
coward, an infinite and endless liar, an hourly promise breaker, the owner of no one good quality.

https://youtu.be/_Ojd0BdtMBY?t=4

Whatever happened to Low-T's wife? Didn't she moderate or something for a while?

# ? Feb 28, 2019 20:34

fool of sound: Oct 10, 2012

Glenn Quebec posted:

Whatever happened to Low-T's wife? Didn't she moderate or something for a while?

She posted a passive aggressive sticky thread about liberal bias in D&D, got laughed at, had a giant rant about reverse racism, got laughed at more, lowtax came in to vaguely smooth things over, and she never posted again.

# ? Feb 28, 2019 20:37

Ichabod Tane: Oct 30, 2005; A most notable
coward, an infinite and endless liar, an hourly promise breaker, the owner of no one good quality.

https://youtu.be/_Ojd0BdtMBY?t=4

fool_of_sound posted:

She posted a passive aggressive sticky thread about liberal bias in D&D, got laughed at, had a giant rant about reverse racism, got laughed at more, lowtax came in to vaguely smooth things over, and she never posted again.

God I wish I read this

# ? Feb 28, 2019 20:48

fool of sound: Oct 10, 2012

Glenn Quebec posted:

God I wish I read this

I do still have the picture she got really mad about :

# ? Feb 28, 2019 20:52

bradzilla: Oct 15, 2004

Glenn Quebec posted:

God I wish I read this

I looked and her entire post history has been scrubbed from the forums :lol:

# ? Feb 28, 2019 20:54

Proteus Jones: Feb 28, 2013

fool_of_sound posted:

I do still have the picture she got really mad about :

# ? Feb 28, 2019 20:55

Ichabod Tane: Oct 30, 2005; A most notable
coward, an infinite and endless liar, an hourly promise breaker, the owner of no one good quality.

https://youtu.be/_Ojd0BdtMBY?t=4

fool_of_sound posted:

I do still have the picture she got really mad about :

A hearty LMAO.

# ? Feb 28, 2019 21:20

Cat Mattress: Jul 14, 2012; by Cyrano4747

necroid posted:

from my tiny iphone screen those looked like screenshots of a doom level

Greetings from the early FPS games thread

# ? Feb 28, 2019 21:44

TehRedWheelbarrow: Mar 16, 2011; Fan of Britches

goddamn incredibly blessed

# ? Feb 28, 2019 21:57

VanSandman: Feb 16, 2011; SWAP.AVI EXCHANGER

The thought that keeps running through my mind is - why did he come back? Did he think we were going to marvel at his finished product when every other step that he's posted has been roundly mocked from the start? What did he hope to gain?
God bless him for posting it, but drat if it doesn't confuse me.

# ? Feb 28, 2019 22:19

YamiNoSenshi: Jan 19, 2010

VanSandman posted:

The thought that keeps running through my mind is - why did he come back? Did he think we were going to marvel at his finished product when every other step that he's posted has been roundly mocked from the start? What did he hope to gain?
God bless him for posting it, but drat if it doesn't confuse me.

The running theory is we'd all be super impressed and ashamed about how we mocked him so before hand.

NARRATOR: They were not.

# ? Feb 28, 2019 22:28

Midnight Voyager: Jul 2, 2008; Lipstick Apathy

VanSandman posted:

The thought that keeps running through my mind is - why did he come back? Did he think we were going to marvel at his finished product when every other step that he's posted has been roundly mocked from the start? What did he hope to gain?
God bless him for posting it, but drat if it doesn't confuse me.

Way back when, in the original incident, he insisted that once we saw the finished project that we'd understand.

So yeah, I guess!

# ? Feb 28, 2019 22:58

polishthunder84: Jul 29, 2014; You feel it too, don't you?

oldpainless posted:

I tie a plastic ice pack around my face and commence with the morning's stretching exercises. Afterwards I stand in front of a chrome and acrylic Washmobile bathroom sink - with soap dish, cup holder, and railings that serve as towel bars, which I bought at Hastings Tile to use while the marble sinks I ordered from Finland are being sanded - and stare at my reflection with the ice pack still on. I pour some Plax antiplaque formula into a stainless-steel tumbler and swish it around my mouth for thirty seconds.

Then I squeeze Rembrandt onto a faux- tortoiseshell toothbrush and start brushing my teeth (too hung over to floss properly - but maybe I flossed before bed last night?) and rinse with Listerine. Then I inspect my hands and use a nailbrush. I take the ice-pack mask off and use a deep-pore cleanser lotion, then an herb-mint facial masque which I leave on for ten minutes while I check my toenails. Then I use the Probright tooth polisher and next the Interplak tooth polisher (this in addition to the toothbrush) which has a speed of 4200 rpm and reverses direction forty-six times per second; the larger tufts clean between teeth and massage the gums while the short ones scrub the tooth surfaces. I rinse again, with Cepacol. I wash the facial massage off with a spearmint face scrub.
The shower has a universal all-directional shower head that adjusts within a thirty-inch vertical range. It's made from Australian gold-black brass and covered with a white enamel finish. In the shower I use first a water-activated gel cleanser, then a honey-almond body scrub, and on the face an exfoliating gel scrub. Vidal Sassoon shampoo is especially good at getting rid of the coating of dried perspiration, salts, oils, airborne pollutants and dirt that can weigh down hair and flatten it to the scalp which can make you look older. The conditioner is also good - silicone technology permits conditioning benefits without weighing down the hair which can also make you look older.

On weekends or before a date I prefer to use the Greune Natural Revitalizing Shampoo, the conditioner and the Nutrient Complex. These are formulas that contain D-panthenol, a vitamin-B-complex factor; polysorbate 80, a cleansing agent for the scalp; and natural herbs. Over the weekend I plan to go to Bloomingdale's or Bergdorf's and on Evelyn's advice pick up a Foltene European Supplement and Shampoo for thinning hair which contains complex carbohydrates that penetrate the hair shafts for improved strength and shine. Also the Vivagen Hair Enrichment Treatment, a new Redken product that prevents mineral deposits and prolongs the life cycle of hair. Luis Carruthers recommended the Aramis Nutriplexx system, a nutrient complex that helps increase circulation.

Once out of the shower and toweled dry I put the Ralph Lauren boxers back on and before applying the Mousse A Raiser, a shaving cream by Pour Hommes, I press a hot towel against my face for two minutes to soften abrasive beard hair. Then I always slather on a moisturizer (to my taste, Clinique) and let it soak in for a minute. You can rinse it off or keep it on and apply a shaving cream over it - preferably with a brush, which softens the beard as it lifts the whiskers - which I've found makes removing the hair easier. It also helps prevent water from evaporating and reduces friction between your skin and the blade. Always wet the razor with warm water before shaving and shave in the direction the beard grows, pressing gently on the skin. Leave the sideburns and chin for last, since these whiskers are tougher and need more time to soften. Rinse the razor and shake off any excess water before starting. Afterwards splash cool water on the face to remove any trace of lather. You should use an aftershave lotion with little or no alcohol. Never use cologne on your face, since the high alcohol content dries your face out and makes you look older. One should use an alcohol-free antibacterial toner with a water-moistened cotton ball to normalize the skin.

Applying a moisturizer is the final step. Splash on water before applying an emollient lotion to soften the skin and seal in the moisture. Next apply Gel Appaisant, also made by Pour Hommes, which is an excellent, soothing skin lotion. If the face seems dry and flaky - which makes it look dull and older - use a clarifying lotion that removes flakes and uncovers fine skin (it can also make your tan look darker). Then apply an anti-aging eye balm (Baume Des Yeux) followed by a final moisturizing "protective" lotion. A scalp-programming lotion is used after I towel my hair dry. I also lightly blow-dry the hair to give it body and control (but without stickiness) and then add more of the lotion, shaping it with a Kent natural- bristle brush, and finally slick it back with a wide-tooth comb.

# ? Feb 28, 2019 23:30

Ghost Leviathan: Mar 2, 2017; Exploration is ill-advised.

Midnight Voyager posted:

I just realized, I 100% know this guy's aesthetic from this bathroom to the example pics for the hidden socks. Leopard print heels and swarovski crystal socks?

My babysitter when I was a kid lived in a trailer park. She had a waterbed and a velvet Elvis and even as a kid, I found everything she owned tacky as hell. Half her clothes were animal print and she had enormous hair. She would have eaten this poo poo up as faux rich and fancy and stylish.

She sounds kinda rad.

# ? Mar 1, 2019 06:39

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# ? May 18, 2024 03:54

FactsAreUseless: Feb 16, 2011

Ghost Leviathan posted:

She sounds kinda rad.

In my head she's played by Marissa Tomei or a young Sarah Jessica Parker

# ? Mar 1, 2019 06:43

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