|
Smirking_Serpent posted:tldr: got asked to go to an awards ceremony thing by someone I had previously done work with. He thought it was a date, i did not realize and now he's annoyed and so is my boyfriend.  Both the dude who assumed he arranged a sex date with someone's boss and the boyfriend who thought who thought she was leading him on. Both of them have it coming.
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 08:57
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 28, 2024 15:26 |
|
|
Serephina posted:I can't blame him for bailing. I'm more of an rear end in a top hat than him, because if my partner told me they were adding 4 people to our household and I had zero say in it, I wouldn't need to ask Reddit for permission before bailing. And that's before the part where it's 4 children and so we'll be 100% financially responsible for all of them. Also I may not fully grasp the hellscape of US healthcare, but if they legally adopt the 13 year old before she gives birth, won't they be responsible for her medical bills? A quick Google suggests that's $3k-$10k assuming zero complications 
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 09:01
|
|
|
HazCat posted:I'm more of an rear end in a top hat than him, because if my partner told me they were adding 4 people to our household and I had zero say in it, I wouldn't need to ask Reddit for permission before bailing. And that's before the part where it's 4 children and so we'll be 100% financially responsible for all of them. You bet your rear end they're on the hook! They're also looking at healthcare even if they got it subsidized through work, which they don't since they work minimum wage, that would be larger than one of the two adults entire monthly paychecks.
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 09:15
|
|
|
I wonder if she could foster instead of jumping straight to adoption. Fostering and fost-adopt arrangements usually have the state cover most medical bills and other expenses. She, not they, because no way is that an appropriate situation to spring on a 22 year old, even if one of his reasons for saying no makes him an rear end in a top hat.
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 09:23
|
|
|
Most states will cover adopted children under Medicaid, so I'm not sure the medical costs are too much of a concern. ^^^^^that guy seems to know more about it than I.
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 09:24
|
|
|
The guy made his boundaries clear at the start of the relationship and is sticking to them. The wife is in a lovely situation, but he has no obligation to stick with her, and if we're talking red flags, whatever you think of "I want my kids to be my own, biologically," it doesn't hold a candle to "I assumed you would grow out of it."
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 09:37
|
|
|
They're 20 and in no position to suddenly adopt a bunch of kids, I can't fault him for recognizing that at least
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 09:43
|
|
|
Not to mention "underage, pregnant, who knows how abused" kids and that's just the oldest of the three. Very, very few people have the strength and fortitude to not only cope with, but not make WORSE, abused children in a family setting with no loving back up or support.
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 09:45
|
|
|
Zulily Zoetrope posted:The guy made his boundaries clear at the start of the relationship and is sticking to them. The wife is in a lovely situation, but he has no obligation to stick with her, and if we're talking red flags, whatever you think of "I want my kids to be my own, biologically," it doesn't hold a candle to "I assumed you would grow out of it." Yeah, the “I assumed you would grow out of it” bit, if nothing else, is a huge red flag
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 09:49
|
|
|
AITA for demanding that my girlfriends gymnastics routine be less "sexy?" I truly want an honest opinion so I'm going to include all details I can w/in char limit, even ones that aren't flattering to me. I've been dating my GF for about a month. honestly I feel much stronger about her than she does me, but I'm hoping she comes around. She is on our university gymnastics team and is an incredible athlete. I went to her meet this afternoon and was freaking shocked to see how much of her floor routine had "sexual" elements. She did her routine to "p'on da replay" and as an example she crawled on all fours, she shook her rear end, she did this thing where she went up and down her body with her finger (including her breasts) and then acted like her finger was sizzling. And during all this, her teammates cheered. I was blown away that this sort of sexuality was not only allowed but encouraged. After the meet I told her I didn't think she should do that sort of stuff. She told me that it was normal for gymnastics and that her routine had been worked out for years with coaches and choreographers. I told her it was normal for strippers who danced for dollar bills. She told me I didn't get it. I told her that I didn't understand what was to get, I was her boyfriend and it was my job to look out for her. She told me "you are literally and rear end in a top hat and way overstepping your bounds!" I told her that I didn't want to fight and she said it was too late. So instead of her going on a romantic date I had planned, she decided to hang out with her teammates. I am so upset because I was counting on seeing her tonight. Based on what she said, am I the rear end in a top hat for thinking her routine should be less sexy and telling her so?
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 10:05
|
|
|
AITA for kicking out my autistic roommate/friend? Some background info: my roommate and I, W, have been friends for 12 years. We’ve had a few disagreements in that time, but nothing crazy. He’s also claims to be on the spectrum (very mild, but not diagnosed by professionals). He’s unable to read social cues sometimes, but nothing too crazy. The past two months have been nothing but problems. The biggest ones are: -We used the stove to keep the apartment warm during winter. Once time he left the gas on for about 24 hours. -Has left 2 month old spoiled food in the fridge. Gf came over one day and told me the place smelled like poo poo. Totally embarrassing. -His dirty clothes is all over the place. We live in an open basement and his bed is 3 feet away from the kitchen. He got offended I didn’t wanna see his dirty underwear. -He smokes all day, and the landlord received complaints so he went into our apartment to check and saw W’s bong out in the open. I’ve told him many many times to put it away. -He hates hearing me and my gf have sex, but doesn’t do anything to cancel the noise on his end. I end up going to my gf’s house 75% of the time. I had told him Feb 24th the best solution was for him to leave. He agreed. After fighting again 4 days ago I reminded him he was to leave at the end of the month. He got pissed and told me he has nowhere to go. He has his dad who has a 2 bedroom apartment but “doesn’t wanna move his things to his dads just to move them again”. I’m seriously getting fed up of his poo poo. Worst part of all, he blames everything on his autism. AITA? EDIT: there is no lease. My landlord is my coworker so everything was verbal EDIT 2: My roommate asked for half the deposit and half of what we split, so I’m assuming he’s leaving on his own!! Sadly I think the friendship is ruined.
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 10:07
|
|
|
I'm on the spectrum and I can tell you your roommate is a loving shithead independent of mental status.
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 10:10
|
|
|
Serephina posted:This is a really hot one, and it's a shame people are skipping it. Sure, the wife is doing a very noble thing by adopting... 3 kids, one of which pregnant when she's minimum wage at 20. Holy gently caress, ok that can work with a shitton of work, you're a better person than me for sure. Also I'm not sure if she knows what she's getting into. It's just way too much, even if the kids were from a not from a broken home and them with a financial and family network to rely on. How the hell are they supposed to shoulder this with their lousy wages (starting where to find a new place for all these people to live in), adding on top that he doesn't seem to have any serious emotional attachment to the kids. Even caring for a single small child is a serious strain on your relationship more often than not. It would be less terrible, if the 13yo could help with the kids, but seeing that she's having a baby herself, that leaves them with 2 babies, a teenager in distress and a 6yo. The guy is 22 years old, look at the asinine poo poo that people usually have to deal at 22. That requires a very serious leap of faith. At best, it's going to be terrible, terrible hard work against all odds to keep it all together (and their relationship), and it seems he doesn't want to chain himself to somebody who is going to blindly drown herself. There's a difference between doing the right and noble thing and sinking yourself.
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 10:41
|
|
|
Not an expert on this, but I really can't see the adoption of a pregnant 13 year-old by a 20 year-old being approved. That's without taking into account the other two kids, that the person wanting to adopt is on minimum wage, and that their partner doesn't want to adopt. On the plus side, it's good that the guy has found out his partner doesn't care about his opinions at all, so he can run far and fast now before getting tied down.
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 10:49
|
|
|
Smirking_Serpent posted:AITA for kicking out my autistic roommate/friend? Uhh one of these points makes the OP a pretty poo poo roommate himself.
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 11:05
|
|
|
My (17F) dad (51M) shuts me down and calls me a “liberal” every time I try to express myself or tell him about my feelings towards his actions. Hey Reddit, My dad is not very conservative, but he does have some radical views on certain topics. He will do things sometimes that make me uncomfortable, I talk to him about it, and he ends p getting defensive and we start arguing. It’s a cycle that repeats itself always, and I’m not able to handle it anymore. When we’re out in public together, he’ll look at other women and make comments about them saying “She’s such a twig!” Or “She’s a porker.” I don’t feel comfortable when he tells me these things, especially considering he’s still married to my mom, so I told him that it’s a little weird that he makes these comments and I was asking him to stop in the politest way possible. He got defensive and angry and told me that I’m getting “very vocal” and that he wasn’t liking that. Another time I was hungry and looking for something to eat and he says “if you keep eating, you’ll soon look like a porker and Lucas (my boyfriend) will leave you!” I’m 5’2 and 108 pounds, so I’m not even close to being overweight. I told him to please not say this to me because he knows I have low self esteem and he gets angry saying what I’m saying isn’t right and that’s can’t stand how liberal I’m becoming and that it’s just the truth. He makes sexist comments in front of me, against women and girls we know personally and not personally, and when I try to remind him I’m a girl and that I don’t think what he’s saying is very respectful, he brushes it off and says again that I’m a “liberal snowflake.” I’m so tired of this and just want to be able to talk to my dad without it getting political, but every time I express how I feel, he puts me down and tries to disregard my feelings. It’s upsetting and making me question even continuing to have a good relationship with him. This makes me sad because I love him and always have been a daddy’s girl, but as soon as I started to have my own views and stances on topics, it’s caused us to be bickering quite often. I’m not sure what to do Reddit, anybody have some advice/help? TLDR; My dad and I are constantly bickering at each other because whenever I express my feelings towards what he says/does, he disregards my feelings and shuts me down, saying I’m being “too vocal,” or a “liberal.” I just want to be able to talk with him regularly and wish he could understand where I’m coming from. Any advice/help?
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 11:13
|
|
|
Smirking_Serpent posted:My (17F) dad (51M) shuts me down and calls me a “liberal” every time I try to express myself or tell him about my feelings towards his actions. Emotionally abusing my daughter to own the libs
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 11:15
|
|
|
Figure out how much reliance you need on him for college and then go from there. Think of it as a sliding scale from "mmhmm dad" followed by never talking to him again after college to "you sound like a fuckboi, dad. Id tell you to lay off the soy but its obviously way too late for that cause Im proof all your swimmers are ladies" and seeing where that takes you.
Barudak fucked around with this message at 12:45 on Mar 24, 2019 |
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 11:28
|
|
|
I can't blame the guy in that adoption story one bit for running as fast as he can. Along with everything that's been said about it so far, the op's wife is expected to continue to raise/adopt ALL future children as well.
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 13:43
|
|
|
AITA for calling myself a marathoner or saying that I completed a marathon? Using a throwaway since I moderate a few other subs. A few years ago I ran in a marathon close by my hometown. I ran the mini-marathon which I think was 5k. My tshirt says marathon, my finishers medal says marathon as does my beer glass they gave me. To me, I ran a marathon. I'm a good athlete but in things like yoga and horseback riding and running this race about killed me and I want the credit. I'm a marathoner. I went to a party last night with my sister (who I don't get along with very well at all) who runs like 100mile races in California and I was talking with her friends about my marathon finish and she got so mad at me. She told me that I didn't run a marathon. I told her I have the Tshirt to prove it. She always goes back to insulting my appearance and I won't say what she said here but it was along the lines of "you're a f@t rear end in a top hat, not only in this situation but all situations and this is why we don't speak!" Am an rear end in a top hat for this?
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 13:59
|
|
|
Lmao that sister thinks stolen valour is a thing but for running
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 14:02
|
|
|
I'm going to laugh at a guy who calls himself 'a good athlete' but a 5k jog 'about killed [him]'. And yes, marathons are 42km, everyone loving knows this. But mountains over molehills for sure, sister could use some chill. Or not. If someone doesn't like you, they're gonna call you on your bullshit.
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 14:10
|
|
|
Marathoner at annoying his sister.
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 14:22
|
|
|
Smirking_Serpent posted:My (17F) dad (51M) shuts me down and calls me a “liberal” every time I try to express myself or tell him about my feelings towards his actions. Murder this idiot and we have one less Trump voter.
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 14:35
|
|
|
Switchback posted:Uhh one of these points makes the OP a pretty poo poo roommate himself. Presuming they share a fridge, OP didn't throw spoiled food out to spite his turdfucker of a roommate either. Both sound terrible.
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 14:47
|
|
|
As somebody who stayed in a relationship for way too many years longer than I should have because we had to take in her two brothers, I completely understand where the dude is coming from. I'm also an obese goon who hates running and still do 5ks occasionally and would never call myself a marathoner. Dude's an rear end in a top hat for trying to brag about it to her friends, especially if they themselves run.
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 15:19
|
|
|
charity rereg posted:AITA for calling myself a marathoner or saying that I completed a marathon? For certain people, running any kind of race at all equates to running a marathon. I often hear “I’ve run a five-k marathon” or “the longest race I’ve run is a ten-k marathon”. It pisses me off because they have not run a marathon and calling themselves marathoners makes them sound ignorant. But does their calling themselves marathoners take away from my marathons? No. Is there stolen valor for marathoners? No. As a runner I typically say, once, “you know that to call yourself a marathoner means you have run 26.2, right?” in case they legitimately didn’t know. But then I drop it because it’s only running and people who go on and on and on about running bore the hell out of everyone else.
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 15:36
|
|
|
charity rereg posted:AITA for calling myself a marathoner or saying that I completed a marathon? I literally guffawed to this. Not an “lol”, an actually loving GUF-FAW
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 15:42
|
|
|
Haha he says in the comments his 5k took him 56 minutes, which is about walking pace, and it was “really hard” for him. Definitely smells of bullshit as who could be that dumb but also he’s a mod on reddit so in that sense passes the sniff test?! Hands off to him whatever the case because I am entertained.
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 15:53
|
|
|
He didn’t give any reason that he and his sister don’t get along, other than she clearly thinks he’s an insufferable rear end in a top hat. I’m not sure how he thinks that getting reddit’s blessing to wear a marathon shirt will remedy the situation.
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 15:53
|
|
|
We have a women's "mini-marathon" (it's a 10K) in Dublin and my GF and all her family hate it because they all do proper marathons but everyone doing this one claims they ran a proper marathon.
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 15:54
|
|
|
LimburgLimbo posted:Haha he says in the comments his 5k took him 56 minutes, which is about walking pace, and it was “really hard” for him.  that's not even walking like you have someplace to be
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 16:02
|
|
|
Well I couldn't run or walk that far so either way, accomplishment.
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 16:02
|
|
|
She should tell everyone who's saying that, that her little 6 year old cousin (or whoever) also did that! She just ran a 'mini-10k' jog, in fact she does one in school ever day! It's only the length of the playground, but hey, mini-10k, amirite?
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 16:03
|
|
|
Sloth Life posted:Well I couldn't run or walk that far so either way, accomplishment. Unless you have a physical disability, yes you can. Even a super turbo lardass at 35 BMI can walk for an hour and a half at a leisurely pace. They just don't want to.
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 16:07
|
|
|
Sloth Life posted:Well I couldn't run or walk that far so either way, accomplishment. Get yourself to YLLS and start yourself on the path to celebrating how humans are basically evolved to be long distance moving machines. It will also help you avoid an early death, which you definitely are going towards if you can’t walk 5k unless otherwise disabled.
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 16:08
|
|
|
Serephina posted:super turbo lardass at 35 BMI check your smallfat privilege
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 16:11
|
|
|
Serephina posted:Unless you have a physical disability, yes you can. Even a super turbo lardass at 35 BMI can walk for an hour and a half at a leisurely pace. They just don't want to. Uuuuh if you think 35bmi is “super turbo lardass” by modern American standards I have some bad news for you
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 16:12
|
|
|
CheesyDog posted:check your smallfat privilege Lmao, I had totally forgotten about that term.
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 16:28
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 28, 2024 15:26 |
|
|
I've never heard the term mini-marathon and I declare it dumb as hell. I've heard of many "half-marathons," which is acceptable.
|
|
#
?
Mar 24, 2019 16:58
|
|
