/r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > /r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

Rubellavator: Aug 16, 2007

I'm betting the roommate lied to get him to leave and he's gonna drive all the way to her house for nothing except maybe to get shot when he tries to break in her bedroom window after her mom tries to explain to him that she's not home

# ? May 8, 2019 20:02

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# ? May 31, 2024 06:51

Sunswipe: Feb 5, 2016; by Fluffdaddy

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

even without the horror movie sequel hook update, the fact that his ex abruptly dropped prep for her her school finals and skipped town in response to his breakup freakout should probably suggest to you that he's leaving some things out, not that bitches be cray

Is his mother even real, or just him in a wig doing an old woman voice?

# ? May 8, 2019 20:04

John Wick of Dogs: Mar 4, 2017; A real hellraiser

Sunswipe posted:

Did you miss the part where she failed the test?

If that causes her to not get a B then the trip would be off. But failing one test might not drop your grade all the way, especially if she had an A before that. If it does, then the consequence, as I said, was already built in. You can cancel the trip guilt free without changing the rules. If she still makes a B that means she put in the work and worked extra hard to make up for the transgression. If you cancel at that point then you were lying about the goals and consequences you set.

# ? May 8, 2019 20:05

I Was The Fury: Oct 19, 2012; Always stop to smell the flowers, just in case they're weeds

AlBorlantern Corps posted:

If that causes her to not get a B then the trip would be off. But failing one test might not drop your grade all the way, especially if she had an A before that. If it does, then the consequence, as I said, was already built in. You can cancel the trip guilt free without changing the rules. If she still makes a B that means she put in the work and worked extra hard to make up for the transgression. If you cancel at that point then you were lying about the goals and consequences you set.

So we're ignoring the condition of "good behavior" then? Because I feel like cheating on your "college simulator" tests is not really considered good behavior

# ? May 8, 2019 20:10

therobit: Aug 19, 2008; I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time

AlBorlantern Corps posted:

If that causes her to not get a B then the trip would be off. But failing one test might not drop your grade all the way, especially if she had an A before that. If it does, then the consequence, as I said, was already built in. You can cancel the trip guilt free without changing the rules. If she still makes a B that means she put in the work and worked extra hard to make up for the transgression. If you cancel at that point then you were lying about the goals and consequences you set.

The agreement also included "if her behavior is good" and I'm fairly certain that cheating falls outside of that. Also "follow the rules and or laws " generally doesn't need to be stated when you are making an agreement based upon performance within an already established framework.

# ? May 8, 2019 20:11

Sunswipe: Feb 5, 2016; by Fluffdaddy

I Was The Fury posted:

So we're ignoring the condition of "good behavior" then? Because I feel like cheating on your "college simulator" tests is not really considered good behavior

Feels like this is turning into "What did the Romans ever do for us?" "Ok, so APART from cheating and failing the test, what did she do wrong?"

# ? May 8, 2019 20:12

hawowanlawow: Jul 27, 2009

therobit posted:

Also "follow the rules and or laws " generally doesn't need to be stated when you are making an agreement based upon performance within an already established framework.

what is this pinko poo poo

# ? May 8, 2019 20:12

therobit: Aug 19, 2008; I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time

"You said that if I paid all my court fines my record would be expunged. How can you take that back because I got the money from robbing a bank?"

# ? May 8, 2019 20:14

Xenocides: Jan 14, 2008; This world looks very scary....

The post is boring but the title is fun.

How long do I (27f) have to act sympathetic toward my friend (32f) for her dumb-rear end baby daddy's (30sm) behavior?

And then this comment:

quote:

If you like this girl as a friend, you're going to have to learn to love her drama-llama-baby-mama life too, because it's never going to slow down.

Sadly though, there are no actual llamas in the story. It was a boring story.

# ? May 8, 2019 20:15

therobit: Aug 19, 2008; I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time

Xenocides posted:

The post is boring but the title is fun.

How long do I (27f) have to act sympathetic toward my friend (32f) for her dumb-rear end baby daddy's (30sm) behavior?

And then this comment:

Sadly though, there are no actual llamas in the story. It was a boring story.

Where does forums poster Trauma Llama fit into this story?

# ? May 8, 2019 20:25

zakharov: Nov 30, 2002; Tater Love

Thrown out of Olive Garden even there's no rule that specifically says I can't bring my pet skunk

# ? May 8, 2019 20:29

Hellblazer187: Oct 12, 2003

Heliogabalos posted:

so "not all white people", kind of like not all men?

White people, men or women, generally and broadly don't get it. They think they do though, that's what makes it even worse. That's why we call it systemic racism. Most white people are profoundly unaware of what privilege means, so they become indignant when that entitlement is called out, especially if they think they already get it. That's called "white fragility", there's tons of information on this cause and effect process which is very common. So if you call out someone's actions for being entitled or god forbid racist white people lose their loving poo poo.

We have an entire sub-forum dedicated to this issue. But I suspect it's because if you point it out in GBS you get poo poo on

You're 100% right - I'm not meaning to argue with you. I misread his comment and realized it's not my place to clarify another posters statements.

I don't know if any white person can "get it" 100%, simply because we experience white privilege and have been brought up with it for so long it's become a norm for us. I do think there are some people who would not be as oblivious as the guy in the story - I think it should be obvious that black person spray painting someone else's property would have a different reaction from police, to put it mildly. I'm entirely with you that systemic racism is real and white fragility is real, I just have to believe we can't all be as stupid as the guy in that particular story.

# ? May 8, 2019 20:34

Hellblazer187: Oct 12, 2003

AlBorlantern Corps posted:

If that causes her to not get a B then the trip would be off. But failing one test might not drop your grade all the way, especially if she had an A before that. If it does, then the consequence, as I said, was already built in. You can cancel the trip guilt free without changing the rules. If she still makes a B that means she put in the work and worked extra hard to make up for the transgression. If you cancel at that point then you were lying about the goals and consequences you set.

Teaching your child to never trust a person in authority is a very good lesson.

# ? May 8, 2019 20:36

Dazerbeams: Jul 8, 2009

Hellblazer187 posted:

You're 100% right - I'm not meaning to argue with you. I misread his comment and realized it's not my place to clarify another posters statements.

I don't know if any white person can "get it" 100%, simply because we experience white privilege and have been brought up with it for so long it's become a norm for us. I do think there are some people who would not be as oblivious as the guy in the story - I think it should be obvious that black person spray painting someone else's property would have a different reaction from police, to put it mildly. I'm entirely with you that systemic racism is real and white fragility is real, I just have to believe we can't all be as stupid as the guy in that particular story.

I hate to break it to you but all white people are dumb as rocks. The men especially so.

# ? May 8, 2019 20:38

therobit: Aug 19, 2008; I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time

Sure hope you guys don't have kids if you think it's appropriate to reward cheating with a multi thousand dollar trip.

# ? May 8, 2019 20:38

Xenocides: Jan 14, 2008; This world looks very scary....

Dazerbeams posted:

I hate to break it to you but all white people are dumb as rocks. The men especially so.

Am white man, can confirm.

# ? May 8, 2019 20:39

Hellblazer187: Oct 12, 2003

Dazerbeams posted:

I hate to break it to you but all white people are dumb as rocks. The men especially so.

Are you sure? That Beto O'Rourke character seems pretty smart and with it.

# ? May 8, 2019 20:40

hawowanlawow: Jul 27, 2009

I'm so white the only feeling I get from seeing white bashing posts is boredom

# ? May 8, 2019 20:41

CheesyDog: Jul 4, 2007; by FactsAreUseless

If she wants to be rewarded for cheating with a trip to Orlando, Universal Studios is like right there

# ? May 8, 2019 20:44

A Wizard of Goatse: Dec 14, 2014

therobit posted:

Sure hope you guys don't have kids if you think it's appropriate to reward cheating with a multi thousand dollar trip.

that'd be well and good but rewarding getting caught???

# ? May 8, 2019 20:45

Willfrey: Jul 20, 2007; Why don't the poors simply buy more money?; Fun Shoe

Not this dirreah garbage talk again

# ? May 8, 2019 20:45

hawowanlawow: Jul 27, 2009

CheesyDog posted:

If she wants to be rewarded for cheating with a trip to Orlando, Universal Studios is like right there

technically it's still Orlando

# ? May 8, 2019 20:45

CharlestheHammer: Jun 26, 2011; YOU SAY MY POSTS ARE THE RAVINGS OF THE DUMBEST PERSON ON GOD'S GREEN EARTH BUT YOU YOURSELF ARE READING THEM. CURIOUS!

hawowanlawow posted:

I'm so white the only feeling I get from seeing white bashing posts is boredom

This is a weird self own.

# ? May 8, 2019 20:45

LadyPictureShow: Nov 18, 2005; Success!

CheesyDog posted:

If she wants to be rewarded for cheating with a trip to Orlando, Universal Studios is like right there

LOL. Or we're still going to Disney... Springs. And I'm not buying you a drat thing in the shops either.

# ? May 8, 2019 20:45

Hellblazer187: Oct 12, 2003

Disney is the loving worst anyways. I don't even get why children like it.

# ? May 8, 2019 20:46

Pope Corky the IX: Dec 18, 2006; What are you looking at?

And Doc McStuffins isn�t even board-certified!

# ? May 8, 2019 20:48

golden bells: Oct 17, 2013

Sad baby man loses his mind with becoming an fb group admin:

My (23F) twin brother (23M) lives in an online fantasy world and it's affecting how he acts in real life.

quote:

I recently found out my brother has been cyberbullying people on Facebook. He's deeply involved in some fb groups that are known as "Leftbook" (leftwing facebook) but don't be fooled, the content of the groups has pretty much nothing to do with actual politics or discussion. Mostly, it's a lot of extremely hostile infighting over matters of identity, interspersed with some funny shitposts and memes.

There's a poo poo ton of drama in these groups. I'm in a few just for memes, and I still see a fair amount of bullying and dogpiling. Many of these people spend hours every day angrily arguing online. The expectations and social norms established in these groups are completely divorced from real life. Rules are stringent, you're banned if you "laugh" react to something problematic or to a mod post, people are snarky at best when disagreeing over minor things (at worst they try to look up your real life family or job to message them that you're a piece of poo poo who believes a bunch of bigoted crap you definitely don't), you're usually assumed to be acting in bad faith, and overall it's juvenile and unnecessarily vicious. Lots of group-mentality. Lots of guilting and pressuring people into very niche, highly ideological viewpoints. This is all totally normal to most of the people involved in it. It's pretty insane to see as an outsider.

So because I'm not on fb all that much due to school and my jobs, I hadn't known my brother was a moderator for some of these groups. I saw some screencaps of a post the other day where I recognized him. The post was this giant storm of drama, mostly him and a few other people ganging up on someone for not putting a content warning on a picture of some female celebrity, then banning them from the group. The person I saw commenting was a self-righteous, power-tripping shithead. That's what facebook moderation abilities have turned him into.

Now, this isn't restricted to the leftbook groups on there. That was just the first time I saw him using a position of relative (if trivial) power to start a fight with people. On his own profile and the profiles of our mutual friends, he does the same thing. He's become steadily more extreme in his behavior and ideas. Nearly every time his posts and comments pop up in my feed, it's something like this, so I actually ended up unfollowing him a few weeks ago.

My brother lives with our parents. I was visiting this weekend after finishing my exams. This was the first time I've seen him since Christmas, and I'm astounded at how much he's changed even after just a few months. I realized we're at wildly different places in life. We'll be 24 in late May. I'm in grad school and working, he's doing nothing and has done nothing since college. Has never had a job. Used to have interests and stuff he did but now just finds fault with everything. He doesn't have many real-life friends (but seems to have a lot of people on facebook who back him up and vice versa.)

In some ways his way of interacting with people has become really childish to me. Specifically, he seems desperate for attention. He somehow finds a way to relate everything back to himself and his feelings, even if it never involved him. It's quite grating. He hasn't, to my knowledge, ever demonstrated awareness of this self-centeredness. He didn't used to be like this as an adult or even that much as a teen.

His general mood and attitude are terrible. He frequently tries to "correct" people. As you'd expect that means he comes off very arrogant and preachy. He often takes it upon himself to criticize anyone (family, friends, internet strangers) for mild opinions they share, the media they like, and particular words they use in casual conversation that he decided are offensive.

Again, I'd already been seeing some of this before I unfollowed him on Facebook. But back in December he didn't really do it in real life. Now it's like I was constantly walking on eggshells around him, until I remembered that was stupid and I wasn't doing anything wrong. It's exhausting to either have to police myself in every conversation, or else deal with a condescending lecture. He'll keep bringing it up too, making passive aggressive comments that make people out to be horrible unless you know the context and what they actually said that he got insulted about.

I talked about the above with my parents a bit, saying I'd noticed the change. They had noticed too and were a combination of annoyed and worried. They know there's something going on with him but don't know how to communicate. They try to explain how being volatile like this is rude and will hurt him in the long run. But he either talks over or talks down to everyone except people whose view in any given situation matches his precisely. So he won't listen to anything they say.

Another thing they said and that I've seen is he's very moralistic about it. This isn't a case of someone truly not being aware of their actions. He knows what he's doing and thinks it's right.

He also lies online. I've seen him say we (his family) are abusive, that he's not a man, that he's Jewish, that he has mental illnesses, plus various minor stuff I don't remember. Some of these he wrote longform essays about on Medium. He's lied to get money before, claiming he's being abused or referencing the above things to guilt people into donating. He throws money away on dramatic gofundme pleas by internet people who are probably doing the same thing.

Most concerning to me is the harassment of other people. In the facebook post I saw, the screencaps included messages he had sent where he told someone to kill themself. Another person added in the comments that she remembered my brother from a time he messaged her telling her to "choke on his dick" (she had a screencap of this). A few people had similar stories of harassment from him. None of these people had done anything bad. It ranged from saying "queer community" instead of "lgbt community" (the girl he told to suck his dick), to being a fan of a youtuber, to believing in humanistic values... this is so dumb typing out, and calling something dumb is another thing he'd explode over for what it's worth...

Under this misplaced outrage I know he is still capable of being a good person. I miss who he used to be, more level headed and able to listen to people without jumping to judgment. I think it would be a shame for him to waste his potential out of nothing but desire to be an rear end in a top hat for no reason. I'm also worried that if he keeps this up he's going to piss off the wrong person. Nothing can truly be erased from the internet, this is now the footprint he's leaving. He could wind up ruining his future prospects before he's even gotten started at having an independent adult life.

TL;DR: My family has recently realized that my brother is spending a lot of his time absorbed in a toxic online echo chamber. He also doesn't have a job or live independently. I think that due to a lack of direction in life he's gotten addicted to outrage and drama. It's been spilling into how he acts with people in real life. Is there anything we can do to help him get out of these insular groups?

The commenters were playing guessing games with who it exactly is.

golden bells fucked around with this message at 21:04 on May 8, 2019

# ? May 8, 2019 20:50

hawowanlawow: Jul 27, 2009

CharlestheHammer posted:

This is a weird self own.

I can afford to leave it to other goons to redeem the white race one post at a time, while I focus on dank memes

# ? May 8, 2019 20:53

therobit: Aug 19, 2008; I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time

golden bells posted:

Sad baby man loses his mind with become an fb group admin:

My (23F) twin brother (23M) lives in an online fantasy world and it's affecting how he acts in real life.

The commenters were playing guessing games with who it exactly is.

Well the short list is just a list of DnD mods...

# ? May 8, 2019 20:54

CharlestheHammer: Jun 26, 2011; YOU SAY MY POSTS ARE THE RAVINGS OF THE DUMBEST PERSON ON GOD'S GREEN EARTH BUT YOU YOURSELF ARE READING THEM. CURIOUS!

hawowanlawow posted:

I can afford to leave it to other goons to redeem the white race one post at a time, while I focus on dank memes

Can�t redeem the unredeemable, so you made the right choice

# ? May 8, 2019 20:55

CheesyDog: Jul 4, 2007; by FactsAreUseless

r/sex
Disney Sexual Fantasies (Not sure how to tell SO)
u/bazookapow

quote:

So in the deep dark corners of my mind I've always had a thing for disney princesses and my girlfriend loves disney movies, so that works out pretty well. My newest crush is Queen Elsa from the newest disney film "Frozen." My SO has the perfect features to dress up as her, the porcelain skin and features (which is amazing), I just don't know how to ask her if she would be willing to fulfill my fantasy without me sounding like a total weirdo. Those of you who have shared an odd fantasy with an SO please weigh in and tell me how you did it, how it went, and if it affected your relationship at all. Thank you so much for helping me as I am being driven crazy being not sure how to approach this.

# ? May 8, 2019 20:55

La Brea Carpet: Nov 22, 2007; I have no mouth and I must post

CheesyDog posted:

r/sex
Disney Sexual Fantasies (Not sure how to tell SO)

Bring it up, but if she declines you have to let it go.

# ? May 8, 2019 20:57

CheesyDog: Jul 4, 2007; by FactsAreUseless

r/sex
[Ageplay] Plus size clothes for an Ageplay middle?
u/MySecretAnonUN

quote:

Does anyone have any resources for plus size Ageplay clothes for a Middle? All I see are things for Littles. My Middle age is 15. I wear a 26/28/4x. My adult style is Torrid, so contemporary as is, but we're looking for something a little younger. Cute with just a touch of rebellion. Think lots of Disney and kids stuff, boy bands, etc. Torrid has some cute Disney stuff but it all kind of has that grown up flair to it. We're just putting our feet in the water with this and Daddy has expressed an interest in my appearance being somewhat naive and innocent, just starting to explore my sexuality. I just can't find decent stuff that fits.

# ? May 8, 2019 20:57

Danaru: Jun 5, 2012; 何 ??

CheesyDog posted:

r/sex
[Ageplay] Plus size clothes for an Ageplay middle?
u/MySecretAnonUN

Hwat in the hell is this

# ? May 8, 2019 21:03

MF_James: May 8, 2008; I CANNOT HANDLE BEING CALLED OUT ON MY DUMBASS OPINIONS ABOUT ANTI-VIRUS AND SECURITY. I REALLY LIKE TO THINK THAT I KNOW THINGS HERE

INSTEAD I AM GOING TO WHINE ABOUT IT IN OTHER THREADS SO MY OPINION CAN FEEL VALIDATED IN AN ECHO CHAMBER I LIKE

Danaru posted:

Hwat in the hell is this

I was thinking this as I read it. Once I got to the end I came to the conclusion that some adults are attempting to act out a daddy/daughter fantasy and she's trying to find cloths that make her look like a young teen?

Not sure if I'm right but it's creepy enough to make it into this thread.

# ? May 8, 2019 21:05

therobit: Aug 19, 2008; I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time

Based on today's posts I am pretty sure r/sex is populated entirely by pedophiles and serial murderers.

# ? May 8, 2019 21:05

chitoryu12: Apr 24, 2014

For once, it really is just ephebophilia!

# ? May 8, 2019 21:06

CharlestheHammer: Jun 26, 2011; YOU SAY MY POSTS ARE THE RAVINGS OF THE DUMBEST PERSON ON GOD'S GREEN EARTH BUT YOU YOURSELF ARE READING THEM. CURIOUS!

MF_James posted:

I was thinking this as I read it. Once I got to the end I came to the conclusion that some adults are attempting to act out a daddy/daughter fantasy and she's trying to find cloths that make her look like a young teen?

Not sure if I'm right but it's creepy enough to make it into this thread.

Yeah I think that T thing is a kids brand or something

# ? May 8, 2019 21:12