- the holy poopacy
- May 16, 2009
-
hey! check this out
-
Fun Shoe
|
It's a funny reply but a really uncharitable reading.
A little bit, but the "set my mind at ease" wording really makes it sound like they're convinced something sinister is going on (with the typical implication being that they're projecting.)
|
#
?
May 29, 2019 13:35
|
|
- Adbot
-
ADBOT LOVES YOU
|
|
|
#
?
May 30, 2024 13:53
|
|
- Pinecone Sample
- Oct 12, 2010
-
THIS ACCOUNT HAS BEEN SEIZED
by the United States Federal Bureau of Investigation in accordance with a seizure warrant issued pursuant to 69 U.S.C Sec. 420
|
AITA for wanting to kick out my step son?
quote:
I'm 29. I married a wonderful man 5 years ago and I moved into his home. He has a son who is 26. His ex wife left them when my step son was a toddler so he essentially grew up without a mother.
Unfortunately my husband passed away last year and I inherited the house. For a few months it was just me and my step son. I started to see someone else who is a few weeks younger than my step son, and he eventually moved in.
My current boyfriend is quite assertive and he clashed a lot with my step son who is very shy. I thought the best way would be for him to leave. Of course my step son was deeply upset since it's the house he grew up in, but my boyfriend assured me that someone who is his age and still living in his childhood home is wrong and should be out by now. Everyone I know (apart from my step son) moved out no later than 21. I just want him out so my boyfriend and I can get on with our lives.
AITA?
|
|
#
?
May 29, 2019 13:40
|
|
- Leon Einstein
- Feb 6, 2012
-
I must win every thread in GBS. I don't care how much banal semantic quibbling and shitty posts it takes.
|
Maybe he can just marry an old woman about to die.
|
|
#
?
May 29, 2019 13:43
|
|
- Molybdenum
- Jun 25, 2007
-
Melting Point ~2622C
|
5'3 and 300+ pounds and she's ragging on her bf's weight? I'm trying to envisage that weight at that height and I'm imagining a blob with little legs
http://www.height-weight-chart.com/
|
|
#
?
May 29, 2019 13:51
|
|
- EIDE Van Hagar
- Dec 8, 2000
-
Beep Boop
|
When I think about all the women I know who got into burlesque my first piece of advice is to change your diet and exercise more
steampunk stripping
|
|
#
?
May 29, 2019 14:54
|
|
- LadyPictureShow
- Nov 18, 2005
-
Success!
|
AITA for not caring anymore for my wife while she's seizing
quote:
In February she developed seizures they were bad 11-15 a day she would fall down and even piss herself and I would have to watch her and change her. We have 3 kids with another that's been staying with us because of their parents issues. I work 40 hours a week and now more now that she's unable to work. Everyday is a pity party for her and she refused to let me get a walker for her but I did anyway she barely used it until she had to take a ER trip, after that she used it more often but not a lot. Then when it got to the point where she had a hard time walking after the seizures I wanted to get her a wheel chair and she refused. Another ER trip after falling and smashing her head on tile and were sitting in the room she's unconscious. I ask the nurse about a perscription for one, she says to call her PCF primary care physician. He declines saying he needs more )info from the ER (this is her 20th+ visit). I'm mad and hang up and ask the ER doctor who instantly grants my request.
She gets out and starts using the wheelchair, she is with a friend during the day while I'm at work, I've told her she needs go stay put at the house until they can figure out whats wrong and how to prevent it or at least reduce the chances for it to happen. She refuses has another accident while out, back in the ER, I want her admitted she refuses. We leave Im currently not speaking to her although I've cared for her. Shes had a seizure or two since then, nothing major, so I leaver her where I find her if she's in good condition with no cuts or bleeding from falling or obvious tramatic damage so she can learn her lesson in a sense, I just feel like an rear end in a top hat for doing it, but she just won't take care of herself, she's 32. I gotta cook clean help 4 kids and work more hours than I can stand but I do it because I want to. Don't pity me just offer your opinion, thank you.
Leaving my piss-soaked wife on the ground after a seizure to teach her a lesson. But the real red flag...
quote:
I appreciate this direction your coming from. We've tried counseling before it's very one sided. Right now she is seeing two therapists. Therapy is not for me. I prefer the wise people of Reddit. Thanks for your comment.
|
|
#
?
May 29, 2019 15:02
|
|
- Grape
- Nov 16, 2017
-
Happily shilling for China!
|
It's very valid to break up with someone over something like this, but it's sociopathic for a person to say "oh well she doesn't wanna be my breeding stock so into the streets she goes"
Like there's a middle ground between being unhappy and staying with her forever and kicking her out by the weekend, it's called breaking things off and giving her a couple months to try and figure stuff out before dumping her on the streets
You must have missed all the stuff about her being in his country 100% due to him on like a fiance VISA or some poo poo.
|
|
#
?
May 29, 2019 15:12
|
|
- Pope Corky the IX
- Dec 18, 2006
-
What are you looking at?
|
Leaving my piss-soaked wife on the ground after a seizure to teach her a lesson own the shrinks.
|
|
#
?
May 29, 2019 15:12
|
|
- Blade Runner
- Aug 14, 2015
-
|
You must have missed all the stuff about her being in his country 100% due to him on like a fiance VISA or some poo poo.
This is a valid point, but it's also a harder one. While this dude is irredeemably a piece of poo poo, it's kinda hard to really navigate what the reasonable solution would be in a situation like this, where you're not happy with your partner anymore but really can't break up with them without drastically loving them over.
Like, even if he lets her stay there for another year, she's not gonna be able to get citizenship in that time and probably still won't be able to go home, but them having to be in an unhappy sham relationship for the next several years is also bad for both of them.
All of this presumes a reasonable and decent person, though, which he isn't, so.
|
|
#
?
May 29, 2019 15:23
|
|
- chitoryu12
- Apr 24, 2014
-
|
I cant break free, i cant break the cycle. Im [31f] hes [29m]
quote:Throw away account
I've never talked about him before. Reddit is the one place i can openly talk to people. Where someone tells me im beautiful and asks how my day is going.
Its been 3 years... at first he was so dreamy, his tall lean body and his long lashes. The way he said my name sent chills down my spine and it wasn't long until i was completely taken over by him. I loved the way he called me babygirl.. we talked all day we slept on skype every night.
He moved in with me 8months later. I asked him to work..he refused, always said theres no jobs here. But he refused to work jobs like gas station or grocery store... and then my mom came and boy.. she made everyone miserable.
But for 2 years every time we fought he blamed me. Everytime we were in a bad situation it was because of my poor decision. He called me stupid, he used words i couldnt understand because english isnt my first language and then he would get upset. He called me a oval office and a stupid bitch. He has this perfect way of turning everything on me..
Sure i am not innocent, but never once did i put him down , never once did i degrade him. I didnt even nag him about getting a job, i just sold my medicine i rely on instead.
He gets the luxury of sitting home playing xbox all day. While i work myself into a grave. I really do try my best. I dont get to buy myself things like a telescope, or little poo poo i need like new panties or something.. because he has a 120$ a month NOS (energy drink) habit. He constantly wants to eat out.
I dont know how i make my bills monthly... right now im considering selling my car to make up the poo poo im lacking. I loved, love? Him til i exploded... i skipped lunch at work to bring him food even if i didnt have time to eat. I cant break free of him.. ive tried to break it off many times and he just finds a way to swoon me back in for awhile... he gets me to the point i want to kill myself and he reels me back in. I cant break away from him.. part of me hopes he will change, part of me feels pity... his smile has always made me weak.
He will say other women are beautiful, but never me. Hed rather watch porn than have sex with me... we have sex once every month an a half.. we sleep at opposite ends of the bed.
Tl;dr
My boyfriend has taken over me and i cant break free of his toxicity. Hes verbally abusive.
|
|
#
?
May 29, 2019 15:28
|
|
- chitoryu12
- Apr 24, 2014
-
|
Little cousin (18 m) is relentless and can't be let down gently. (I'm 26f)
quote:So a bit of context. My little cousin was born early and suffered some complications, so granted his parents dote on him since they cherish his survival and view it as a blessing (I'm sure it really is). Problem is, since they dote on him so much they've given him a lot of unrealistic ideals and expectations. He's graduating college but he is small in frame and looks like an middle school student, which for his age is a setback for dating (I'm not trying to come off as judgemental, but when compared to his classmates he isn't the first choice amongst girls his age and that's a fact). It doesn't help that his parents talk him up and he's still try to ask out his uni's model looking aces. I'm not that close to him, but I always found it quite cruel that all my cousin's ignored him so I try to respond whenever I can via his Instagram messages.
Problem is he always asks me questions that make me really uncomfortable. He'll ask me if I can introduce my girl friends to him, if I can set him up, or if he can come drink with my friends. He's very straight laced and cannot hold his liquor, not only will he not mix well with my friends, try to hit on them but will also make his parents upset with me if he goes home plastered. I've turned him down multiple times letting him down gently by telling him my friends are quite heavy drinkers and I don't want his parents to be upset at me for bringing him into this kind of an outing . Still, he'll constantly ask.
Nowadays he'll keep asking me why girls are rejecting him and such, and I have no way of telling him why without hurting his feelings (and it's just not my place to do so), so I tell him that it's okay and that he should focus on self improvement such as learning skills that could advance his career in society or hobbies he's interested in, still he comes back to the main question why are they rejecting me. Lately I've been really tired of him constantly asking to meet up despite my heavy work schedule and quite frankly I just don't want to deal with it anymore. I tried rejecting over and over again blaming it on my heavy workload, only to have him ask me a month in advance to schedule with me. So now I've stopped reading, and replying to all his messages because honestly it just stresses me out so badly. There are just so many things that I can't say to him to adjust his behaviour and outlook because really, it's not my right, and he's my aunt's precious son and I have to right to go right around and shatter whatever ideals they have built.
But now he is constantly messaging me, on multiple platforms and will not give up. Every message basically asking to hang out or attend his graduation (again we aren't close!!). I have not read or opened any of them and so now he has resorted to calling me with multiple different numbers and now I'm scared to pick up my phone and I have interviews and interviews calling me which really stresses. Me out.
My dear redditors, someone, anyone, please give me some advice!!!!
TLDR: I have an awkward cousin that I have been trying to let down gently who doesn't get it, and has been resorting to (almost) harassment.
According to the comments, they're in Taiwan and he only speaks Chinese.
|
|
#
?
May 29, 2019 15:31
|
|
- DemoneeHo
- Nov 9, 2017
-
Come on hee-ho, just give us 300 more macca
|
Help! My Husband Isn’t Having an Affair After All. Can I Divorce Him Anyway?
quote:Q. Cheater, cheater … awesome fella? For the past six months, my husband has been distant, secretive, and impatient with me while also being in frequent contact with his cousin’s wife. I assumed there was an affair, but it turns out that he was helping her to leave a domestic abuse situation, and she had sworn him to secrecy. They both swear that nothing happened, and I believe them.
The problem is that it doesn’t help. For the past two months, in my head, I’ve been emotionally on my way out the door. I’ve talked to lawyers, investigated my options for rentals closer to work, and been unhappy but ready to leave. Now that I’ve discovered I was wrong about my husband, I still feel ready to go. He doesn’t understand, since he was actually doing a really good thing. Which he was, but at the same time he lied to me and let me feel terrible—and he knew I thought he was cheating—in service of this good thing. In addition to being emotionally divorced already, I’m quite angry too. I know it was for a good cause, but I still feel like he reverse-gaslit me by letting me believe he was a cheater and then doing the “Ha, you misjudged me!” reveal.
My mother and sister think I’m being ridiculous and that he’s a hero. My dad thinks that your spouse’s well-being should come before anyone else’s and I am better off without him. I don’t know. It feels ridiculous to leave someone because you found out they’re not cheating. I know the answer is going to be couples therapy, but I want to know if I’m in the wrong or not before we go in there. I’ve felt “ganged up” on a lot recently, with everyone saying how good a guy my husband is. I mean, he is—but maybe not a great husband?
quote:A: Oddly enough—because this sounds so unique—I answered a question about almost the exact same situation about two years ago on the podcast. You might find that answer helpful. In the meantime I’ll just say that you are entitled to feel hurt and upset about the past six months. You don’t have to determine whether your husband is a hero or not; all you have to do is identify how your experience of the past six months made you feel. Would it really have been impossible for him to say, “I’m helping someone I care about leave a very dangerous situation and I’ve been sworn to secrecy until after they’re out. If it were my story to tell, I’d share it with you in a heartbeat; since I can’t, I just want you to know the broad details so you don’t feel confused or abandoned”? And did helping her really mean that it was appropriate for him to get impatient and distant with you?
I think it’s probably a good idea to spend a little more time with the question of whether you two can repair your marriage before deciding to file for divorce. (You are, of course, allowed to if you want, even if other people in your life disagree—they’re not the ones who are married to him.) But if he can’t acknowledge that you have a right to feel hurt, that he essentially disappeared on you for half a year without a word to reassure you, then that says a lot about his priorities.
|
|
#
?
May 29, 2019 15:32
|
|
- chitoryu12
- Apr 24, 2014
-
|
My[22M] bf [25M] and I haven’t had sex, but I found out that he is on Grindr. I don’t know how I feel about that.
quote:I (22 M) have been dating this guy (25 M) for over a month now. Things seem to be going great. We click and we enjoy each other’s company. We have hung out at his place and had a lot of make out. He didn’t feel ready to move further than that at the time, and I truly admired that cause I felt like he was looking for more than hookups and wanted something serious and long term. We haven’t had the talk about being official, and I don’t really know how to bring it up. I personally stopped talking to guys when I started seeing him, and I thought he did the same.
Yesterday we had a great time together and I was gonna talk to him about being committed. We were flipping through his phone and I noticed he has Grindr on his phone. Grindr is well known for hookups, and I don’t think people are on it just to make friends or anything like that. I got really hurt and disappointed, but I didn’t bring the subject up and didn’t talk about being committed.
He’s been wanting to wait to have sex with me, and he hasn’t made any move in that direction, and I really respect that. My issue is that I don’t get how come he’s looking for sex somewhere else while I am waiting for him to be ready.
Do you think he doesn’t wanna have sex with me? I really don’t like to be in this situation. I’ve clearly expressed to him to importance of being committed and my stand on hookups as something that I don’t wanna be a part of.
What do you think?
TL;DR: Date is on hookup app even though he hasn’t wanted to have sex with me. Is he looking for something else? What should I do?
"My boyfriend is refusing to have sex with me and is browsing a hookup app. Does this mean he doesn't want to have sex with me?"
|
|
#
?
May 29, 2019 15:37
|
|
- Leon Einstein
- Feb 6, 2012
-
I must win every thread in GBS. I don't care how much banal semantic quibbling and shitty posts it takes.
|
My[22M] bf [25M] and I haven’t had sex, but I found out that he is on Grindr. I don’t know how I feel about that.
"My boyfriend is refusing to have sex with me and is browsing a hookup app. Does this mean he doesn't want to have sex with me?"
It's not even his bf yet though.
|
|
#
?
May 29, 2019 15:39
|
|
- DemoneeHo
- Nov 9, 2017
-
Come on hee-ho, just give us 300 more macca
|
Jealous husband, creepy colleague
quote:I’m a man married to another man, and mostly our relationship is wonderful. The issue is that my husband often gets jealous, and in particular this has come to a head with “Tom,” my colleague at work. I used to get on very well with Tom, but he flirted with me a lot, so I cooled toward him. We are in the same friend group at work though, so we see each other a lot.
Next month, we’ve been assigned to go on a trip to Sweden for a conference together: me, Tom, and one other person. I am dreading it. Tom has made a number of jokey comments when we’re out with friends about “getting me drunk” so I’ll sleep with him when we’re there and makes snide remarks about my husband behind my back. (I know this from a friend telling me—the same friend had blown up at him for one of the “drunk” comments, so I think she has my back here and isn’t just spreading gossip.)
My husband won’t stop being unpleasant and upset about the trip, and he keeps acting like I’m going on a romantic getaway. He interprets me saying I’m not remotely interested in Tom as excessive denial to hide my interest. I feel trapped and unable to talk about work to my husband anymore (he will always bring Tom up), and even though this conference will be great for my career (it was a big deal to be selected), I’m considering not going just to avoid Tom. If I do go, I’m planning on not drinking, which is annoying and will provoke stupid comments, but feels worth it for my peace of mind.
What can I do about any of this? I don’t know what to say to my husband to convince him I’m completely faithful, and I wish I could talk to him about my concerns over the Tom thing without it turning into an accusatory conversation. Please advise!
quote:I am so worried for you, letter writer, because you’re having to deal with a co-worker who has openly planned to try to get you drunk enough on a work trip so that he can take advantage of you, and your husband apparently considers that infidelity on your part, rather than sexual harassment on Tom’s! When it comes to work, I think it’s time to tell Tom he needs to stop making those comments, then talk to your own supervisor and HR about rearranging the trip so you don’t have to travel with him. When it comes to your husband, all I think you need to say is this: “Tom is sexually harassing me and I’m afraid of what he might do to get what he wants. I need your support, not your jealousy.” If he can’t pretty quickly get it together, heartily apologize, and ask how he can help you, then you’ve just learned something pretty sad about your husband. I’m so sorry this is happening to you, and I hope you can get the help at work you need. (I also hope Tom gets fired for this!)
Guillotine Tom, divorce your husband
|
|
#
?
May 29, 2019 15:40
|
|
- chitoryu12
- Apr 24, 2014
-
|
WIBTA for getting a car towed from my building's parking garage
quote:The apartment building I live in is new construction and I was one of the first tenants. So the garage hasn't been entirely filled yet. It was only recently that it started appearing that over 50% of the spots were full.
I own two cars because I'm an addict. This is definitely against the rules but plenty of parking so whatever. I work on both cars and having them next to each other makes life immensely easier. To make that happen I found two spaces out of the way and in between two support pillars.
Great system until January when this Jaguar showed up in one of them and hasn't moved since. There isn't another viable location against a wall. Now I'm lugging tool bags all over the place and it's generally a pain. I started drawing the date in the dust on the Jag's windshield to verify it's never moved. They're still there (along with penises other people have drawn). And the battery is dead now because the security light is no longer flashing. It's either just being stored there or is abandoned.
I haven't said anything because I don't want them auditing the parking and noticing my extra car. But I'm going to move out soon so I don't have to worry about that. WIBTA if I insisted the derelict car be removed out of spite? It will be helpful for others once the building is leased up and parking is scarce. At the same time, pretty hypocritical.
"I break the rules and act like a jerk. Would I be the rear end in a top hat if I didn't let other people break the rules?"
|
|
#
?
May 29, 2019 15:46
|
|
- chitoryu12
- Apr 24, 2014
-
|
WIBTA if I got my brother-in-law condoms for his baby shower?
quote:My Fiances brother is a mess. All of his girlfriends have been picked up at some party and he believes he is infertile, so he never wraps it. This dude also has almost three kids. (He likes to over share about his sex life, kinda wish I could gag him when he starts talking about it but I'd rather not get decked)
He is currently in a custody battle with his first kids mom. This battle had been going on for almost 2 years. He got his current wife pregnant, that kid is almost one and she's pregnant again. She told me she wants to keep having kids until she gets a girl.
He's now living with his mom because his wife kicked him out for going mudding every weekend but somehow it's okay for her to do a line of coke while pregnant??
This isn't the first time she's this either. There's also no point in trying to help him or offer any advice. He is very hard headed, stubborn, a little narcissistic, and has the shortest fuse I have ever seen. His wife is the same, her way or the highway. My fiance and I live in the same house because I'm in college and not working. I get the joy of hearing every argument between him and his wife when he is home and it reminds me of my dad's house. Oh the nostalgia. It also makes me feel bad for the kids.
They also constantly complain about being broke but will always have a beer in one had, a cigarette in the other, and are doing who knows what else (other than the coke, which I heard is pretty expensive)
Together they have 3 kids and since she's pregnant again I was thinking that a box of condoms would be cheaper than all the legal fees of custody battles, child support, or possibly more baby showers. I asked my fiance about this and he thinks it would be funny.Would I be the rear end in a top hat to get them condoms when they have a baby shower?
Verdict: I'm TA and won't be getting them anything for their baby shower. Dispite what it may seem I have a pretty good relationship with my Brother-In-Law, don't judge a book by its cover people
|
|
#
?
May 29, 2019 15:51
|
|
- Smirking_Serpent
- Aug 27, 2009
-
|
Is it appropriate for my husband (26m) to share a blanket fireside with our friend (27f) who we have a history of flirting with? Or am I over reacting?
My new husband (26m) and I (26f) are currently going on a disagreement/fight for 4 days, due to either of us having to work. We have been together almost 9 years, and just got married 2 weeks ago. So he was over at his buddy’s house drinking most of the day, I popped by after work (9:45pm) just to say I and return home since I had to work the next day. I walked in the house and they’re all sitting outside by the fire pit (not unusual), but this time I see him sitting on a small wicker 2 person bench with one of our friends (27f) but they’re both under a blanket, he just turns around to say “hi”, and doesn’t get up to greet me. This really irritated me (more than normal) after working 13 hrs, being hungry, and having moderate back pain that night.
My problem is I DO NOT think it’s appropriate for anyone in a relationship to be sharing a blanket with another person in a relationship, especially since there is a history of flirting from both of us and we have casually discussed a threesome with her. I’m really upset because he has not even acknowledged my hurt feeling, is more concerned about appearances around our friends, does not think he did anything wrong, won’t compromise with me about what is and is not okay for both of us. I felt like this wouldn’t have been as big of an argument if he said “oh sorry, I didn’t realize that wouldn’t upset you, I was drinking and I won’t do it again”. I have tried to talk to him about it but the next day after work he was drinking again, but says they’re HIS friends, they act differently when I’m not there because they don’t want to have me “freak out” (the only times I get upset is when I have been way to drunk and have cut back my drink a lot and this hasn’t happened since). But IS worried that “I made it so awkward for everyone else there” I talked to them and apologized, as they’re my friends too, they are not upset or feel awkward.
Im just so frustrated because we usually get along pretty well, but when we have an argument he never apologizes and says “You have a jealousy problem, and you need to work on that.”
TL;DR Husband shared a blanket with our female friend, history of flirting, I am upset, he won’t acknowledge I’m upset at all just thinks I’m “over reacting”, he doesn’t think it’s something we should discuss, and I just need to “deal with it”.
Am I over reacting? It’s just hard when your husband is also your best friend so you feel like you have no one to talk to.
|
|
#
?
May 29, 2019 16:11
|
|
- sephiRoth IRA
- Jun 13, 2007
-
"Science is not only compatible with spirituality; it is a profound source of spirituality."
-Carl Sagan
|
Yeah, I was sorta sympathetic/understanding toward the OP, because suddenly becoming the sole provider for four kids and an ailing wife for the past three months is a for sure ticket to caregiver fatigue; but that bit about just leaving her on the ground if she isn't bleeding or broken anything is just beyond.
But then in the comments he was kind of a turd in the comments and at one point referred to his wife as disrespectful.
That’s pretty gross and depressing. I really hope he gets therapy, it sounds like he needs it badly.
|
|
#
?
May 29, 2019 16:16
|
|
- Leon Einstein
- Feb 6, 2012
-
I must win every thread in GBS. I don't care how much banal semantic quibbling and shitty posts it takes.
|
Lol at the wife melting down over her husband sharing a blanket yet also discussing her husband actually having sex with the woman.
|
|
#
?
May 29, 2019 16:34
|
|
- chitoryu12
- Apr 24, 2014
-
|
Is it appropriate for my husband (26m) to share a blanket fireside with our friend (27f) who we have a history of flirting with? Or am I over reacting?
My new husband (26m) and I (26f) are currently going on a disagreement/fight for 4 days, due to either of us having to work. We have been together almost 9 years, and just got married 2 weeks ago. So he was over at his buddy’s house drinking most of the day, I popped by after work (9:45pm) just to say I and return home since I had to work the next day. I walked in the house and they’re all sitting outside by the fire pit (not unusual), but this time I see him sitting on a small wicker 2 person bench with one of our friends (27f) but they’re both under a blanket, he just turns around to say “hi”, and doesn’t get up to greet me. This really irritated me (more than normal) after working 13 hrs, being hungry, and having moderate back pain that night.
My problem is I DO NOT think it’s appropriate for anyone in a relationship to be sharing a blanket with another person in a relationship, especially since there is a history of flirting from both of us and we have casually discussed a threesome with her. I’m really upset because he has not even acknowledged my hurt feeling, is more concerned about appearances around our friends, does not think he did anything wrong, won’t compromise with me about what is and is not okay for both of us. I felt like this wouldn’t have been as big of an argument if he said “oh sorry, I didn’t realize that wouldn’t upset you, I was drinking and I won’t do it again”. I have tried to talk to him about it but the next day after work he was drinking again, but says they’re HIS friends, they act differently when I’m not there because they don’t want to have me “freak out” (the only times I get upset is when I have been way to drunk and have cut back my drink a lot and this hasn’t happened since). But IS worried that “I made it so awkward for everyone else there” I talked to them and apologized, as they’re my friends too, they are not upset or feel awkward.
Im just so frustrated because we usually get along pretty well, but when we have an argument he never apologizes and says “You have a jealousy problem, and you need to work on that.”
TL;DR Husband shared a blanket with our female friend, history of flirting, I am upset, he won’t acknowledge I’m upset at all just thinks I’m “over reacting”, he doesn’t think it’s something we should discuss, and I just need to “deal with it”.
Am I over reacting? It’s just hard when your husband is also your best friend so you feel like you have no one to talk to.
On that note...
My boyfriend 23m took a 3 hr nap w his 23f best friend in his bed. Is this ok?
quote:21F here. My boyfriend and I have been together almost two years. He (23M) has a best friend who is a girl (23f). She just got into (our) town early this morning to visit her family/friends. She went to his house at 5 am this morning to see her best friend (my boyfriend). They talked for a while, took a nap for three hours in his bed, woke up, then they continued talking and she left. He just told me all this a while ago through fb messenger, to which I replied, “where did she sleep?” He replied but I haven’t replied since, as I want to think this through. It feels like I’ve been cheated on. Sleeping with someone is an intimate act. Especially with someone of the opposite sex. Wouldn’t a guy be upset if his girlfriend slept with another guy? Even if there’s no sex or touching involved? To make matters worse, I’m already a sensitive person when it comes to stuff like this and he knows that about me. Do I have the right to feel upset? Betrayed? I feel sick to my stomach thinking about him in bed with another girl. In the bed we make love in. The bed we sleep together in. I feel betrayed. I feel cheapened. Like our time in that bed has lessened in value and intimacy. I don’t know if I can get past this.
tl;dr my (23f) boyfriend (23m) slept with his best friend (23f) for three hours in his bed, no sex or touching. Should I be upset?
|
|
#
?
May 29, 2019 16:34
|
|
- chitoryu12
- Apr 24, 2014
-
|
My mom [55F] refuses to accept the age gap between me [21F] and my SO [24M]
quote:This is a sort of half-rant, half-sanity check, because while I understand why my mom is upset, I don't think it deserves the anger she's feeling. It will definitely come up over the holidays, so I want to get some more perspective before then.
My SO (we'll call him David) and I met when I was 14 and he was 17 through a church group. We had a ton in common and became good friends instantly. However, we were strictly platonic friends and were both in relationships. When I was 17, one of his best friends told me that David had a crush on me. I confronted David, and he said it was true, but he didn't want to tell me since he didn't want to interfere with my current relationship. We remained friends, but it was a bit awkward and we didn't talk as much for a period. About a year later, I had broken up with my ex and was talking to David more (my ex didn't allow me to talk to David and I listened). I eventually realized I was falling for him, because he had treated me like how I deserved to be treated since Day 1. I told David, we dated for awhile, and decided to be exclusive pretty soon after.
So, I was 18 and he was 21 when we got together. However, my mom brings up the age gap any time she can, claiming he's a pervert who was trying to get with a 14 year old girl and that he was the reason I ended my last relationship. I'm really not sure what to say to her. Yes, I understand why a 14 y/o girl hanging out with an older guy sounds sketchy. But what was I supposed to do? Not make friends with a good group of people? It didn't matter to me at the time, because he never made a pass at me or did anything creepy. I'm not sure if she has a point, but even if she does, does it even matter anymore?? We've been dating for 4 years, I'm the happiest I've been, and David is very sweet to my family even though my mom ignores him.
What am I even supposed to say to her? It feels silly to talk about this years later. If he was a creepy guy, clearly I would've seen that by now and wouldn't have dated him. Any advice?
TL;DR: My mom rejects my SO because we met when I was 14 and he was 17, although we didn't date until much later.
|
|
#
?
May 29, 2019 16:43
|
|
- Literally A Person
- Jan 1, 1970
-
Smugworth Wuz Here
|
Finding seizures disrespectful is some pretty next level evil. Like, the guy is pushing towards cartoonish super-villainy.
|
|
#
?
May 29, 2019 16:56
|
|
- chitoryu12
- Apr 24, 2014
-
|
AITA for not caring anymore for my wife while she's seizing
Leaving my piss-soaked wife on the ground after a seizure to teach her a lesson. But the real red flag...
Hmm, let's look at Reddit to see what people are saying. Ah, here's the top voted comment!
quote:NAH. She's obviously not wanting to accept her fate and she no doubt hates depending on you. You obviously have caregivers fatigue and are burned out.
Try to explore some so options on where you can dial back the amount of work you have to do around the house.
|
|
#
?
May 29, 2019 17:19
|
|
- chitoryu12
- Apr 24, 2014
-
|
Pro spoiler use! I clicked 21f and thought "40m"
I was searching for age gap stories to find the most ridiculous ones. In some ways I did!
I (26F) found my boyfriend's (31M) reddit account and I'm devastated by his online persona
quote:We've been together for 3 years, living together for 2 years. I always knew that he used reddit, but I didn't bother about looking for him because it didn't matter to me all that much and I wanted to respect his privacy. I'm a frequent reddit user as well, and while I make no attempt to hide my account, I'm not open about my activities on reddit.
I hopped on his computer one day to print something out and saw that reddit was open on his computer. I thought it would be fun, so I tagged him in RES so if I saw him comment or post in the wild I would know it was him.
This didn't come up until a few months later, I was reading an /r/AskMen thread about what the biggest turn-offs were and I saw him comment about being completely disgusted by fat women and that he'd never date a 'landwhale'. My morbid curiosity got the better of me and I explored further, and found more comments in the vein of FPH, saying fat people have no self-control and eat burgers and cake all day. That they're all delusional about how much they eat. That seeing their cottage cheese thighs made him want to barf. He commented about (not on) posts on /r/NormalNudes and made degrading comments about the women's bodies on there (many who resemble mine), disparaging their sagging breasts and stretchmarked bodies. He also comments on various petite NSFW subs and is vocal about his preference for small, tight bodies and smaller breasts because they don't get 'saggy and gross' like larger breasts do.
This was a gut punch for me. I've been 'fat' for all of my adult life. When we met I was considered fat, and in the process of losing weight. We fasted 20/4 together and I regularly went to the gym for powerlifting and cardio. A year in I was hit with medical issues that culminated in me having my thyroid surgically removed. Since then I've put on all the weight I lost and then some, and am pushing 250lbs. My self-confidence is in the toilet and I can't stand looking at my naked body.
My boyfriend, by contrast, is incredibly fit, exercises daily, has a physical labor job, and is hyper-conscious of everything he puts in his body. He loves cooking for me and exploring new restaurants, and I've never felt shamed for my eating habits by him. He knows the portions I eat (about half what he does... and he usually eats my leftover half too) and knows I'm not stuffing my face with pizza and ice cream every day like he claims fat people do.
In addition, my breasts have always been larger than average for my size and are not immune to gravity in the least and the up and down of my weight has also taken a toll on them. My boyfriend has never been shy about his love for my breasts, through words, touching and attention, and told me that I should not be ashamed of my breasts, or any part of my body.
My boyfriend has been super supportive throughout the entire relationship, before the medical issues he encouraged me to not push myself in the pursuit of losing weight and 'looking better', and that as long as I was healthy and happy, the number on the scale or the inches on the tape didn't matter. After my medical issues cropped up and in the ensuring recovery he actively insisted that I stop working out and return to an intuitive diet so my body would not be stressed and I could focus on getting better. He's taken it upon himself to monitor my health and blood levels and do his own research and bring up issues with my doctor.
I could not ask for a better person to lean on throughout all of this, but after seeing his posts I'm heartbroken. I've always thought that actions speak louder than words, but seeing him say those things make me question this entire relationship. Has anything he's ever said or done been truthful? How can I trust someone that is so two-faced?
TL;DR I found my boyfriend's reddit account, and saw he has a history of making derogatory comments about fat people and their bodies. I am fat, and IRL he is very supportive and understanding about my weight issues. I don't know what to believe anymore.
|
|
#
?
May 29, 2019 17:24
|
|
- new boot goofin
- Jul 23, 2007
-
like school in july
|
Yeah, I feel like the post was attempting to make a point that this person posting was somehow 'crazy', but they are a disabled person living in a world where abled folks can't even just move the loving delivery truck over. They're not crazy, they're in the right and we're a bunch of loving assholes for thinking someone doing basic advocacy for themselves is demanding too much.
Disabled spaces aren't just 'free' spaces open for abled folks everyday use 'except when needed' by the disabled. They are spaces we leave open -all the time- specifically to accommodate those who may need them at any time, because we are making space in society for them. We can get up and walk the extra drat few feet.
It's crazy how many people seem to think 'well it's not being used now so it's ok, I'm not hurting anyone' when you are literally stealing space from the disabled. It is designed to make society more accommodating, to make space for others, it's not your space, leave it be!!!
nah, you guys are both right, it was a post in pretty bad taste on my part. I guess I thought the image of a woman screaming at the top of her lungs in a McD's drive through along with a confused employee was pretty amusing
|
|
#
?
May 29, 2019 17:58
|
|
- chitoryu12
- Apr 24, 2014
-
|
Ah, here we go.
UPDATE Me [27 F] with my boyfriend [50 M] of three months, his kid warned me about him. Red flag?
quote:Hi /r/relationships. It's been a couple of months since my last post. Thanks for all the advice, even though it was tough to hear. I ended up deciding to move forward with the relationship but keep an eye out for any other red flags.
To backtrack, early in our relationship I got a text from a friend of mine that he had seen Jesse at the local strip club. I spoke to Jesse about it, and he said he did not consider it cheating because he did not get lap dances or touch the dancers. I let him know then that I would let it slide but in the future, I am not okay with him going to strip clubs without talking to me about it first. He agreed.
But I kept noticing he would be out working late. He told me he had an emergency (flood) and had to work late and I ended up seeing him at a gas station that I was driving by. I stopped and talked to him and he said he had just gotten off work but he smelled like cigarettes and alcohol and his clothes weren't dirty like they typically are when he works flood damages.
I also noticed he was very protective of his work phone. He leaves his other cell phone out all the time, but once I asked to use his work phone to look something up and he basically told me no and to go get my phone charging in the other room.
It all just built up so I snooped. I got up in the middle of the night when I was staying at his place and looked through both phones.
On his work phone, I found texts to escorts and strippers.
On his other cell, I found a ton of texts to his ex wife who he promised me he didn't talk to anymore unless it was about Julian. Apparently she just started dating again a month ago, and he absolutely shredded her for it. He said some very cruel things, like "you must have found a guy who loves fat asses if he'll be seen with you". She never replied, as far as I can tell. Looking at those texts, I knew that any future with Jesse was going to end like this.
I also saw that he never messages Julian. What's worse, their text feed is Julian reaching out every couple months and getting ignored. One text from a few months ago was Julian telling him that his band had a gig and asking if he would come. I remember that weekend. Me and Jesse stayed in that night and had a bunch of sex. He never even mentioned his son had a show. I felt sick. I went online and bought 10 copies of his band's EP a few days later.
In the end, I decided to just ghost him. He obviously had no respect for our relationship, and I felt I didn't owe him anything. When he was at work, I got all my things out of his apartment and left a note. I just wrote that his family was right about him and to not contact me again.
He texted me later that he had an emergency and had to work late...He obviously hadn't seen my note and I just didn't respond. The next day he found the note and started messaging me about it. I decided to take a page from his ex wife's book and ignore him. As the week moved on and he realized I was serious the messages started getting hateful, things I don't care to repeat. I blocked his number then.
It is disturbing for me to think about what a cruel and viscious person he ended up being. If Julian hadn't talked to me at that bar, how much longer would it have taken me to see this side of him? I also have this weird guilty feeling that I'm a homewrecker, even though Jesse obviously wrecked his home himself. I really thought of me and Jesse as having a potential for a long term relationship. It hurts to have those hopes crushed. I'm not getting any younger.
I got a lot of comments last post about the age gap. I'm not really interested in that. I know several couples with significant age gaps. I'm a grown woman, not a teenager, and I can choose to date someone older. Hopefully it won't be an rear end in a top hat next time.
Tl;Dr: My ex boyfriends son was right about him. I'm feeling lost and second guessing myself, but at least we aren't together anymore.
EDIT: Thanks for teaching me a lesson. This is a painful time for me. I won't be responding to any more comments or PMs. Thanks.
|
|
#
?
May 29, 2019 18:01
|
|
- Adbot
-
ADBOT LOVES YOU
|
|
|
#
?
May 30, 2024 13:53
|
|
- Heliogabalos
- Apr 16, 2017
-
you can still key in codes for the cheapest of item (for example, celery instead of organic whatever) and no one pays any attention and it saves me a fuckton of money on organic produce
|
Jealous husband, creepy colleague
Guillotine Tom, divorce your husband
Gay men have a serious complex where they think they can get away with "telling it like it is" (i.e. racism) or sexual harassment towards other gay or bisexual men - or the old trope of telling bisexuals they're truly gay or faking it or, when they find out someone is bisexual they ask if they gently caress, as if bisexual=hypersexual. There is a lot of shittiness in the gay male community. It doesn't help that their straight white female friends think they're hilarious, either.
|
|
#
?
May 29, 2019 18:59
|
|
#
?
May 29, 2019 13:35
