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monkeytek
Jun 8, 2010

It wasn't an ELE that wiped out the backer funds. It was Tristan Timothy Taylor.

Every time I think Tojal can't get anymore stupid than he already is.

https://twitter.com/justcutemsgs/status/1129869989362753536?s=20

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trucutru
Jul 9, 2003

by Fluffdaddy

Asmodai_00 posted:

when the gently caress did SA become a safe space? was it when we decided to ban pedophiles and reddit didn't?

First they came for the pedophiles...
...
...
...
Now I am oppressed! (Hugs 600-years-old anthro-spaceship dakimakura)

trucutru
Jul 9, 2003

by Fluffdaddy

Lord Stimperor posted:

It's certainly a safe space in the sense that I haven't received unwanted dickpics from the dick wolf yet

I see that The Titanic has not being her job properly and has left your PMs alone.

Titanic, you know what to do.

Gosts
Jan 15, 2016


A glimpse into the Tojal universe:

Receipts are an optical illusion.

The checkout line at jewel-osco is a one-way street. If you attempt to walk backwards, the conveyor belt will kick into gear.

If you sit down at a restaurant, you must purchase and consume a meal. If you sit down but then attempt to leave before you have bought something, the federal agent sitting next to you will block your path with his body and say 'no sir' over and over again until you sit back down.

Nyast
Nov 14, 2017

BLAZING AT THE
SPEED OF LIGHT

Lol at Crytek asking CIG to return credits to Cryengine on their splash screen.

Imagine the rage from the whiteknights if they succeed :)

Scruffpuff
Dec 23, 2015

Fidelity. Wait, was I'm working on again?

iospace posted:

SC has none of these mechanics.

Nyast
Nov 14, 2017

BLAZING AT THE
SPEED OF LIGHT
Also... SHOTS FIRED !

quote:

Crytek is fairness driven, not money driven, and if fairness ultimately means nothing more than stopping CIG in its tracks because monetary relief is not available, that would meet Crytek’s objectives.

In other words Crytek just admitted they're going in for the kill :)

reverend crabhands
Feb 3, 2016

Nyast posted:

Lol at Crytek asking CIG to return credits to Cryengine on their splash screen.

Imagine the rage from the whiteknights if they succeed :)

Aye, the dream is full screen, first thing that appears, unskippable, maybe with some audio "CRRYYYY-TEKKKKKK" it would be . :qq:

I think that would be enough tbh.

Bonus would be if Crytek are entitled to a share of ongoing ship sales, however small, so say everytime a ship was purchased 1% went to Crytek.

iron buns
Jan 12, 2016

The new thread title is :discourse:

kw0134
Apr 19, 2003

I buy feet pics🍆

As you all know, criminals are known for their op-sec, like deleting stuff and renaming threads to hide the incriminating evidence we just leave around on public forums. That way, it's hard to prove criminal conspiracy because we mislabel our notes! Who says goons aren't crafty.

Foo Diddley
Oct 29, 2011

cat

kw0134 posted:

As you all know, criminals are known for their op-sec, like deleting stuff and renaming threads to hide the incriminating evidence we just leave around on public forums. That way, it's hard to prove criminal conspiracy because we mislabel our notes! Who says goons aren't crafty.

NOTmycrimes.txt

reverend crabhands
Feb 3, 2016

Yes well done changing the thread title, I just don't see how we will ever be caught.

:yeshaha:

reverend crabhands fucked around with this message at 19:57 on Jun 8, 2019

Ramadu
Aug 25, 2004

2015 NFL MVP


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8939aURV9Dc

alpha gameplay footage

Lack of Gravitas
Oct 11, 2012

Grimey Drawer

Lord Stimperor posted:

Not quite.

When guild wars 1 came out, my buddy and I would play it together. We had user names like cutegrl1992 and hung out in global chat. We'd chirp about how we were just two young girls who just couldn't figure out this game because computers are hard. Took us about 30 minutes to get all the gold and bling you could possibly trade between accounts.

Wondering if you can still do that in SC, whether it's ethical, and whether I can be bothered to feel dirty enough for that.

Star Citizen can't be pay-to-win because it has catchup mechanics like this available to new players


those bookmarked searches tho...


Earth has 4 corners simultaneously 4 days in only 24 hour rotation. SIMPLE MATH IS RETARDATION

Mirificus
Oct 29, 2004

Kings need not raise their voices to be heard

iron buns
Jan 12, 2016


Literally other games bad = Star Citizen good

Mirificus
Oct 29, 2004

Kings need not raise their voices to be heard








Mirificus fucked around with this message at 20:14 on Jun 8, 2019

skeletors_condom
Jul 21, 2017

CIG should sell their customizer to real world car companies:

https://clips.twitch.tv/UgliestInnocentSoymilkPeoplesChamp

Courtesy of SC Relay.

Hav
Dec 11, 2009

Fun Shoe

Lord Stimperor posted:

Not quite.

When guild wars 1 came out, my buddy and I would play it together. We had user names like cutegrl1992 and hung out in global chat. We'd chirp about how we were just two young girls who just couldn't figure out this game because computers are hard. Took us about 30 minutes to get all the gold and bling you could possibly trade between accounts.

Wondering if you can still do that in SC, whether it's ethical, and whether I can be bothered to feel dirty enough for that.

Yes, No, and yer a goon now Harry.

Sarsapariller
Aug 14, 2015

Occasional vampire queen

Lord Stimperor posted:

When guild wars 1 came out, my buddy and I would play it together. We had user names like cutegrl1992 and hung out in global chat. We'd chirp about how we were just two young girls who just couldn't figure out this game because computers are hard. Took us about 30 minutes to get all the gold and bling you could possibly trade between accounts.

Wondering if you can still do that in SC, whether it's ethical, and whether I can be bothered to feel dirty enough for that.

You've fallen victim to one of the classic blunders: assuming that Star Citizen has enough functional systems to troll. Let me help:

* You cannot change your username in game. In fact I think it may be a paid service now, on their website.
* You cannot log in to a server with your teammates consistently.
* About 75% of the time, global chat is bugged or simply turned off.
* There is no in-game trading of any kind.
* The only out-game trading is the ability to send entire spaceships between accounts. No currency, no items.

Other than that yeah go nuts, it won't be the first time someone's pretended to be :females: and received ships from backers.

Beet Wagon
Oct 19, 2015







Oh? What could this be?



I TOLD YOU THOSE FUCJING CAT PICTURES WERE GOING TO BRING US DOWN!! I TOLD YOU!

:laffo: Tojal is absolutely the best star citizen guy. Absolutely incredible.

peter gabriel
Nov 8, 2011

Hello Commandos
Don't mind me guys I am just doing some crime, you ain't seen me, right?

Quavers
Feb 26, 2016

You clearly don't understand game development
Hi Toejam :wave:

I'm now going to test out some "crime": I'm going to order $400 of CIG's finest jpegs using my VISA credit card, and then in a day's time request a refund because the ordered goods are broken.

When that Don Karnage bot gives me the runaround for 2 weeks, 90 days tops, i'm contacting VISA to issue a chargeback.

For the goons here who sometimes play this mess: which is the most-broken jpeg or few that I should buy?

Secondly: do VISA tally up chargebacks to a company, like am I more or less likely to successfully get a refund if others have already charged-back?

Zazz Razzamatazz
Apr 19, 2016

by sebmojo

Beet Wagon posted:



Oh? What could this be?



I TOLD YOU THOSE FUCJING CAT PICTURES WERE GOING TO BRING US DOWN!! I TOLD YOU!

:laffo: Tojal is absolutely the best star citizen guy. Absolutely incredible.

That is a fuckin' nice kitty right there.

SPERMCUBE.ORG
Nov 3, 2011

Space commies are th' biggest threat t' red-blooded American Freedom we got in th' future. So me and my boys got to talking over a few hot dogs the other day and this is what we came up with...
Don't worry, tojal has nothing. He's only pierced the first layer of defenses. At this rate he'll never decode our secret crimes database.

Bofast
Feb 21, 2011

Grimey Drawer

peter gabriel posted:

The defenders on reddit are now the last left, the pure, undiluted knuckle heads.
I like them because they do all the hard work of making their cult look insane all by themselves with no prompting.
I also like to remind myself that development started in 2011, the game is half a decade late, doesn't work, has no gameplay and cost over a quarter of a billion dollars.
This is my recap on the amazing project CI have given us, like comedy mana from heaven, every aspect of it is so ridiculously idiotic you just have to giggle, from the joyless baboons like Twerk and Boredgamer making hour long videos no one cares about, to the insane ramblings of joe loving blober, always on duty to defend the honour of a corporation that gives not a solitary poo poo about him, it's just brilliant from any angle you care to look at it from.
Massive overscaled tanks that are so comically huge they are useless, trains that float above the tracks no clipping through all in their path, travel times measured in dozens of minutes in a game with less than 2 star systems, Sandi going psycho and strangling people, Chirs stood on a yacht in the biggest 'gently caress you got mine' pose there is, Ben stalking newsreaders, their engine creator suing them, them selling huge chunks of the business right from under backers noses, stock images stolen with abandon, it's just all loving brilliant.
The backdrop of a gaggle of grade A twats defending it all the way just makes it funnier and funnier.
It's a dead project, I loving still love u str ctzn

:same:

Mirificus
Oct 29, 2004

Kings need not raise their voices to be heard

SPERMCUBE.ORG posted:

Don't worry, tojal has nothing. He's only pierced the first layer of defenses. At this rate he'll never decode our secret crimes database.



Sarsapariller
Aug 14, 2015

Occasional vampire queen

Quavers posted:

For the goons here who sometimes play this mess: which is the most-broken jpeg or few that I should buy?

Do you want something that's broken in the sense of playable but not completely functional or not delivered as advertised? Because you can pretty much just buy any ship in the game and make that case for it. If you really want to get specific try the Reclaimer or the Starfarer- the salvage and fuel ships, in the game that doesn't have salvage, or refueling.

Or do you want something that has literally never been delivered? In that case, try the Redeemer or Banu Merchantman.

iron buns
Jan 12, 2016

Detective Toejam and the Case of Crimes Against Fidelity

Quavers
Feb 26, 2016

You clearly don't understand game development

Sarsapariller posted:

Do you want something that's broken in the sense of playable but not completely functional or not delivered as advertised? Because you can pretty much just buy any ship in the game and make that case for it. If you really want to get specific try the Reclaimer or the Starfarer- the salvage and fuel ships, in the game that doesn't have salvage, or refueling.

Or do you want something that has literally never been delivered? In that case, try the Redeemer or Banu Merchantman.

Nice & thanks! :hfive:

Beet Wagon
Oct 19, 2015





iron buns posted:

Detective Toejam and the Case of Crimes Against Fidelity

:vince:

tooterfish
Jul 13, 2013

SPERMCUBE.ORG posted:

Don't worry, tojal has nothing. He's only pierced the first layer of defenses. At this rate he'll never decode our secret crimes database.
But he was right on the money about those sexy bears!

Sarsapariller
Aug 14, 2015

Occasional vampire queen

We're coming to the end of Q2, which means features are starting to get chopped from the next big super-patch. Oh well! I'm sure they'll be in the next one, right?

I mean I for one don't have any problem with 3 out of the 4 AI tasks for this quarter being cut, in the game where *checks notes* none of the AI works at all. Seems like fringe garbage to me!

TheAgent
Feb 16, 2002

The call is coming from inside Dr. House
Grimey Drawer
Chris roberts is one of the most unattractive men no matter what kind of animal you shop his face on

TheAgent
Feb 16, 2002

The call is coming from inside Dr. House
Grimey Drawer
I like how q2 release date means right at the last loving day of the quarter, missing features and released only to evocati accounts

Lack of Gravitas
Oct 11, 2012

Grimey Drawer
Hi Tojal!! I picked this out especially for you, I hope you'll like it :)

:nws: ONE HOT BEAR IN A HOT-TUB, no kinkshaming plz, you guys :nws:

Foo Diddley
Oct 29, 2011

cat
Dumbfuck nerds losing their poo poo because consumer protections exist will never stop being funny. Keep on cheerleading, guys; I'm sure these faceless corporations really appreciate you going to bat for them, and will notice you any day now

Foo Diddley
Oct 29, 2011

cat
How dare you attack my personal friend, Robert Space Industry Holdings, LLC, Maldives Division, this way? You will regret your crimes

Sarsapariller
Aug 14, 2015

Occasional vampire queen

TheAgent posted:

I like how q2 release date means right at the last loving day of the quarter, missing features and released only to evocati accounts

And then spend the next two months trying to fix it, further delaying all your other quarterlies. That's game development! Don't worry, citizens are absolutely confident that this is going to be the best patch ever.

At this point I don't even see anything really in 3.6. It's just a bunch of location/ship/gun assets, same as 3.5, but at least 3.5 was advertised as having the huge flight model update that would fix everything. What does 3.6 even have? The hover mode? The ship rental system, still sitting at 0% completion? Ragdoll improvements? There's not a single item in this quarterly that has any bearing on the main state of the game.

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Mirificus
Oct 29, 2004

Kings need not raise their voices to be heard

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