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Aye Doc
Jul 19, 2007



the only thing that will be more fearsome than the Carolina Hurricanes roster is the speed at which their hairlines are degrading. I can think of few people who better exemplify Team Jerk than the extremely angry, bitter sufferers of Male Pattern Baldness. give me Auston Matthews. within 18 months, this fella is going to be wearing ball caps in all his interviews and being paparazzi'd out in public with a putrid, mangled shambles of a buzzcut. now my challenge is surrounding him with a group of follicle-tested vets to guide him into his new future...

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corn on the cop
Oct 12, 2012

Break what must be broken, once for all, that's all, and take the suffering on oneself.

― Corey Dostoyevsky
As everyone with half a brain knows, the best players in the hockey world come from the province of Ontario. Good, hard-working salt-of-the-earth boys known for their resilience and tenacity. You can’t win without these wholesome lads.

With their first selection, the Dallas Stars are proud to select from Markham, Ontario: Steven Stamkos.

Jamwad Hilder
Apr 18, 2007

surfin usa
I don't know how I'm supposed to pass on a guy who has 228 points over the past two seasons.

Bruins pick Nikita Kucherov

Twin Cinema
Jun 1, 2006



Playoffs are no big deal,
don't have a crap attack.
MacKinnon has taught me not to rush to judge a player who is surrounded by a bad team and is still young. I mean, I do believe that great players can transcend their bad teams, and they won't necessarily see a jump in their point production surrounded by a better team, but I probably shouldn't have figured that he'd stay where he was at 21.

Also, I am surprised Stamkos was the first Lightning forward picked. Feels like he's been forgotten, a bit.

Precambrian Video Games
Aug 19, 2002



I took Aleksander Barkov 25th overall in 2016. Obviously, that wasn't going to happen again. Somehow he scored 93 points last season and I'm sure all the fancystats are great and everything. Also, the Leafs have a decent track record with Russo-Finnish forwards with names ending in -ov.

stab
Feb 12, 2003

To you from failing hands we throw the torch, be yours to hold it high
I must be blind wheres the comedy spreadsheet so i know when i have to reach in the 1st round

Teemu Pokemon
Jun 19, 2004

To sign them is my real test

With full no movement clause
"NYC I'm comin for ya"

Ergo Propter Hog
Jul 21, 2014



stab posted:

I must be blind wheres the comedy spreadsheet so i know when i have to reach in the 1st round

https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1JOZfvDBowWzNLrGsSePJgCSQe9kTj2QQIGHF4JYjWqI/edit#gid=0

EL BROMANCE
Jun 10, 2006

COWABUNGA DUDES!
🥷🐢😬



In his first year of fantasy hockey, eager to prove his lack of knowledge outside of the :catdrugs: fancy cats :catdrugs: and a variety of league dinosaurs - EL BROMANCE proudly picks Patrick Kane and hopes he hasn't entered it wrong on the spreadsheet at all.

Jordan7hm
Feb 17, 2011




Lipstick Apathy
With the 11th pick of the fantasy draft, Ottawa is happy to select the still best all around player in the league: Sidney Crosby

His contract is a bargain considering he's almost certainly going to score 500+ points over the six remaining years, all while putting up awesome possession stats as the top center in the game.



https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=neO44K7Awg0

fawning deference is up

fawning deference
Jul 4, 2018

I was hoping Sid would fall to me! This is a tough pick because I don't think there is an obvious choice, so I'm going to take Jack Hughes baby.

Ergo Propter Hog
Jul 21, 2014



The Islanders select the guy who is "a weak forechecker, slow to the action and not getting it done", Tyler Seguin.

lazerwolf is up.

lazerwolf
Dec 22, 2009

Orange and Black
The historic Vegas Golden Knights select Leon Draistl with their first overall pick in the 2019-20 season.

FBS is on the clock

lazerwolf fucked around with this message at 01:16 on Jul 15, 2019

fawning deference
Jul 4, 2018

Seguin is real good but this definitely seems too early for him to go.

Precambrian Video Games
Aug 19, 2002



fawning deference posted:

Seguin is real good but this definitely seems too early for him to go.

fawning deference posted:

I was hoping Sid would fall to me! This is a tough pick because I don't think there is an obvious choice, so I'm going to take Jack Hughes baby.

t a s t e
Sep 6, 2010

Lol

Good Soldier Svejk
Jul 5, 2010

fawning deference posted:

Seguin is real good but this definitely seems too early for him to go.

He's actually the third highest goal scoring center over the past five seasons so it's not completely insane, and given his shiny new contract I'd say it's a pretty solid decision

corn on the cop
Oct 12, 2012

Break what must be broken, once for all, that's all, and take the suffering on oneself.

― Corey Dostoyevsky
good work today boys

Due Up (7/15):
FBS (12:00 pm EST)
Kuule hain nussivan
JawKnee
Kilza
Drunk Canuck
Jonathan Fisk

FBS
Apr 27, 2015

The real fun of living wisely is that you get to be smug about it.

The only thing more important in the modern NHL than youth and cost certainty is absolute, unwavering loyalty to the franchise.

The Anaheim Ducks select Sebastian Aho, born July 26, 1997.

t a s t e
Sep 6, 2010

The defenseman? Good pick

fawning deference
Jul 4, 2018

Is Jack Hughes not a good pick? There were some amazing young players on the board still but Hughes is 18 and should be a top end offensive producer. I considered a couple wingers who were still there but ultimately I wanted a center.

Seguin is really good but there are players available who are definitely better and much younger.

Precambrian Video Games
Aug 19, 2002



Well you passed over several young PPG+ centers (including Aho) so if you think Hughes is going to be better than all of them then good luck I guess.

Ginette Reno
Nov 18, 2006

How Doers get more done
Fun Shoe

eXXon posted:

Well you passed over several young PPG+ centers (including Aho) so if you think Hughes is going to be better than all of them then good luck I guess.

Well if you believe in his potential then you probably have him as a top 10 or top 15 player in the league about 2-3 years from now which would make him a decent pick from that perspective I guess.

Is that preferable to taking a known commodity like Aho who is already a top player in the league and only a few years older? I dunno.

T-Bone
Sep 14, 2004

jakes did this?
Too early for Jack I think with some of the really good 24 and under guys still left, but it could work out.

fawning deference
Jul 4, 2018

That's all fair but Hughes could definitely be a PPG player in a year or two and I wanted a center. Most of the guys I was considering taking were wingers.

t a s t e
Sep 6, 2010

it doesn't top TJ, certainly

Kilza
Oct 4, 2013

I feel like it's too early for Jack Hughes. 2nd round, sure, but mid-1st round is questionable.

Next up:
Kuule hain nussivan (until 12 PM EST)
JawKnee
Kilza
Drunk Canuck
Jonathan Fisk

fawning deference
Jul 4, 2018

Surprised about the conflict on Hughes - do people not think he'll be a PPG player? If so, why is it so early to select an 18 year old PPG center? Or 70 pt center who could get up 85-90 pts in 2 or 3 years? Am I overestimating his production?

t a s t e
Sep 6, 2010

There's a run on centers and he'll most likely be a legit 1C soon but he wasn't on my top 5 list at your pick. Past drafts have had Eichel/Matthews in similar positions though I'm not sure he'll reach that tier

fawning deference
Jul 4, 2018

I think he reaches Eichel's tier - Eichel has only one PPG season so far. He's basically an 80+ pt player. I think Hughes gets there in a year or two, especially if he's playing with Hall. I think he has a 65+ pt rookie season. Eichel had 57 in his.

fawning deference
Jul 4, 2018

I hope he makes me look good and breaks in with a monster rookie season

t a s t e
Sep 6, 2010

sure, scoring's inflated, but I expect him to start his career as more of a nolan patrick

incidentally eichel's underlying numbers are insane and he's due to blow up like mackinnon

T-Bone
Sep 14, 2004

jakes did this?
Now that's way too far in the other direction. Boy is gonna get at least 50 points. Probably more like 60.

Kilza
Oct 4, 2013

It's worth noting that in the past 10 seasons, there's only been 3 rookies who have managed to put up 0.8 P/G or higher (aka 66+ points over 82 games) after being drafted that summer (McDavid, Matthews, somebody who hasn't been drafted here yet). I think it's more likely that Jack Hughes ends up in the 50-60 point range in his first season if he plays all 82 games.

t a s t e
Sep 6, 2010

T-Bone posted:

Now that's way too far in the other direction. Boy is gonna get at least 50 points. Probably more like 60.

Yeah I said that thinking he was 40-50 for some reason

Maybe Reinhart or Nico would be a better example as first forward

Kuule hain nussivan
Nov 27, 2008

FBS posted:

The only thing more important in the modern NHL than youth and cost certainty is absolute, unwavering loyalty to the franchise.

The Anaheim Ducks select Sebastian Aho, born July 26, 1997.

Because the Anaheim ducks are a bunch of poo-poo heads, the Colorado Avalanche selects Mark Scheifele with their first round pick.

PS. I don't know how this works, do I update the spreadsheet?

corn on the cop
Oct 12, 2012

Break what must be broken, once for all, that's all, and take the suffering on oneself.

― Corey Dostoyevsky
I got you.

The easiest thing to do is to go on a site like Capfriendly and enter the full player/contract details up to three years as well as the expiry date. The colors on the spreadsheet designate one's position which auto-fills after picking.

Drunk Canuck
Jan 9, 2010

Robots ruin all the fun of a good adventure.

can i pick now

lazerwolf
Dec 22, 2009

Orange and Black

fawning deference posted:

I hope he makes me look good and breaks in with a monster rookie season

When you pass up known ppg+ players for a rookie in the first round, yeah he's not that great of a pick.

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Ergo Propter Hog
Jul 21, 2014



Drunk Canuck posted:

can i pick now

Jawknee has until 12:00 pm EST, then Kilza, then you.

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