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trucutru
Jul 9, 2003

by Fluffdaddy

Beet Wagon posted:

I know I've said this a couple times but it always really surprises me the way citizens become more and more unhinged the longer this goes on.

Imagine stanning a loving progress bar that has never actually been tied to any kind of progress lol

They look at the progress bar and dream about how much more finished the *real * progress bar is.


e: I'll post about the catte taxxe and you can dream about it

trucutru fucked around with this message at 00:01 on Aug 11, 2019

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Sabreseven
Feb 27, 2016

trucutru posted:

They look at the progress bar and dream about how much more finished the *real * progress bar is.


e: I'll post about the catte taxxe and you can dream about it

You mean the secret 'dev build' of the progress bar V2, which is being developed with total transparency behind closed doors, which has been delayed because the guy responsible for making the high end coffee for the guy who is working on 'progress bars V3' got stuck in the garage door mechanism while bike riding and broke both his wrists because he was distracted by the strangler getting tickled by a lawyer with grabby hands, who was at the time responding to DS's FUD during July so the pipeline is still being developed, but the concept video for it is in greybox stage and just needs SSOCS in order for the bartender to mo-cap subsumption AI so that Mark Hamil can give his best performance as "Old Man" while a thumb absolves itself and CitizenCon can happen, this is all dependant on 'item v5' and 'concierge v4' being just around the corner and in concept stage before the alpha releases internally to testers who shitcan the whole thing completely succesfully into a vertical slice.

And thusly,

fin.

Mirificus
Oct 29, 2004

Kings need not raise their voices to be heard

Mirificus
Oct 29, 2004

Kings need not raise their voices to be heard

TheDarkFlame
May 4, 2013

You tell me I didn't build that?

I'll have you know I worked my fingers to the bone to get where I am today.
Even when someone's on Kazan's side, or at least taking a perfect opportunity to mock Lethality for being a harbinger of bad products, he can't help but be a dick and accuse them of conspiracy. I mean come on, dude.

Mirificus
Oct 29, 2004

Kings need not raise their voices to be heard

trucutru
Jul 9, 2003

by Fluffdaddy

OK, fess up. Who of you is this guy? Like, be more subtle you idiots!

Zazz Razzamatazz
Apr 19, 2016

by sebmojo

Quavers posted:



:nms:

Star Citizen: actual udder physics, fine, grip and tension controls, a mini game to maintain optimal milking flow

Mirificus
Oct 29, 2004

Kings need not raise their voices to be heard

trucutru posted:

OK, fess up. Who of you is this guy? Like, be more subtle you idiots!

XK
Jul 9, 2001

Star Citizen is everywhere. It is all around us. Even now, in this very room. You can see it's fidelity when you look out your window or when you watch youtube

Brazilianpeanutwar posted:

fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuucking hell,this is some loving Brass Eye level dark comedy writing here,jesus.

"peter you've lost the neeeeews plot".

I had a little mind explosion when I realized that guy was also the article writer.

Edit: Oh yeah, there you go, thanks Miribot. I should learn to refresh.

Iceclaw
Nov 4, 2009

Fa la lanky down dilly, motherfuckers.
Jesus. SC really is a honeypot for the worst kind of gamers, isn't it? That this guy has an audience, and that he probably is constantly as much of a loving rear end in a top hat kind of sicken me.

monkeytek
Jun 8, 2010

It wasn't an ELE that wiped out the backer funds. It was Tristan Timothy Taylor.

Iceclaw posted:

Jesus. SC really is a honeypot for the worst kind of gamers humans, isn't it? That this guy has an audience, and that he probably is constantly as much of a loving rear end in a top hat kind of sicken me.

fify

Tokamak
Dec 22, 2004

Rotten Red Rod posted:

Maybe if they were working on SSOCS it'd be in the loving roadmap

Have you no faith in the secret internal roadmap?!?

IncredibleIgloo
Feb 17, 2011






Is this the cringier version of the Joker and "Gamers rise up" slonk weed thing?

Anticheese
Feb 13, 2008

$60,000,000 sexbot
:rodimus:

I'm struggling to think about how that person got onto the polynomial field thing and I just can't come up with any plausible scenario on how the hell would this ever come up, even with CIG's overselling.

Tokamak
Dec 22, 2004

Iceclaw posted:

Jesus. SC really is a honeypot for the worst kind of gamers, isn't it? That this guy has an audience, and that he probably is constantly as much of a loving rear end in a top hat kind of sicken me.

They made their name as a pro-gamergate games 'journalist'.

bbchops
Jul 26, 2001

Ho ho ho! I'll have the same again!
Nap Ghost

Sabreseven posted:

"You can sit down here"
"There are spaces to sit down in"
"Here you can sit down, possibly"
"Imagine rich people sitting here, waiting"
"When we get fish tech, there'll be fish here"
"This also forms a screen, where you can get changed"

Wtf is this? This isn't a space game, there's no actual gameplay, there's no potential even for gameplay, only an apparent artist showing off basic cookie cutter room design and asking people to 'imagine' things the whole way through, it's a ridiculous waste of money and time. Are they not supposed to be thinking about things like people running through there shooting stuff and lobbing grenades around?

The Sims 4: Blast Off!

bbchops
Jul 26, 2001

Ho ho ho! I'll have the same again!
Nap Ghost

This conversation has made me angrier than anything else in months.

Beet Wagon
Oct 19, 2015





Do I even want to know what "GJP" is?

Beet Wagon
Oct 19, 2015





trucutru posted:

e: I'll post about the catte taxxe and you can dream about it

I'm doing what CIG cannot:

bbchops
Jul 26, 2001

Ho ho ho! I'll have the same again!
Nap Ghost

Beet Wagon posted:

Do I even want to know what "GJP" is?

I assume J stands for Justice and I never want to hear from that fucker again.

Beet Wagon
Oct 19, 2015





Goon Justice Patrol - the brave men and women of dead gay comedy site www dot Something Awful dot com who patrol the streets day and night, PMing pictures of Goatse to weird internet dipshits

Ramadu
Aug 25, 2004

2015 NFL MVP


Beet Wagon posted:

Do I even want to know what "GJP" is?

game journalist pros according to that link in his bio

Beet Wagon
Oct 19, 2015





Ramadu posted:

game journalist pros according to that link in his bio

That's much less bad than what I was imagining based on his posting

Potato Salad
Oct 23, 2014

nobody cares


Hey how is St-

Quavers posted:



:nms:

Star Citizen: actual udder physics, fine, grip and tension controls, a mini game to maintain optimal milking flow

Oh

Agony Aunt
Apr 17, 2018

by LITERALLY AN ADMIN

So, basically all he's got is insults. Yeah, that's a real powerful argument.

Fargin Icehole
Feb 19, 2011

Pet me.

Agony Aunt posted:

So, basically all he's got is insults. Yeah, that's a real powerful argument.

His name is One Angry Gamer, what did you expect

monkeytek
Jun 8, 2010

It wasn't an ELE that wiped out the backer funds. It was Tristan Timothy Taylor.

Beet Wagon posted:

Goon Justice Patrol - the brave men and women of dead gay comedy site www dot Something Awful dot com who patrol the streets day and night, PMing pictures of Goatse to weird internet dipshits

I am so signing everything with that from now on!

Sarsapariller
Aug 14, 2015

Occasional vampire queen

Man, that roadmap thread. It's at 500 comments now. That's basically bigger than the sum of all other thread activity for the week, and it's largely negative. Things are looking extremely poor for CIG.

I think it's really telling that the defenders are now writing complete fiction. They used to take the bare threads of excuses that CIG would play out and run with them. But CIG's been forced into some kind of "Honest accounting" mode in the last year, and the honest account is that.... they basically can't accomplish anything. Rather than see the writing on the wall, guys like Kazan and logicalChimp are retreating further and further into this "Super-secret features that for some reason they won't tell us about." Nowhere is there any kind of logic about why something as dry and pointless as "Server side object container streaming" would be hidden. Nowhere do they explain why it would take more than a half-dozen people even for the most complex system that CIG could envision. What do they think 500 artists and level designers have to do with back-end code? Why on earth would they do feature after feature on chefs and towels while they have some kind of tech revolution cooking? It's insane- in a very literal way, the things they're imagining do not correspond to reality anymore.

We've reached what feels like the final stage, to me. The cultists are rocking back and forth in the cabin as everything falls apart around them, hugging their knees and chanting to themselves "Krusty is coming. Krusty is coming."

MedicineHut
Feb 25, 2016

Sabreseven posted:

You mean the secret 'dev build' of the progress bar V2, which is being developed with total transparency behind closed doors, which has been delayed because the guy responsible for making the high end coffee for the guy who is working on 'progress bars V3' got stuck in the garage door mechanism while bike riding and broke both his wrists because he was distracted by the strangler getting tickled by a lawyer with grabby hands, who was at the time responding to DS's FUD during July so the pipeline is still being developed, but the concept video for it is in greybox stage and just needs SSOCS in order for the bartender to mo-cap subsumption AI so that Mark Hamil can give his best performance as "Old Man" while a thumb absolves itself and CitizenCon can happen, this is all dependant on 'item v5' and 'concierge v4' being just around the corner and in concept stage before the alpha releases internally to testers who shitcan the whole thing completely succesfully into a vertical slice.

And thusly,

fin.

Holy loving poo poo

MedicineHut
Feb 25, 2016


The real question that will gently caress up your brain is, who of these 2 is the fudster?

Quavers
Feb 26, 2016

You clearly don't understand game development

Sarsapariller posted:

Man, that roadmap thread. It's at 500 comments now. That's basically bigger than the sum of all other thread activity for the week, and it's largely negative. Things are looking extremely poor for CIG.

I think it's really telling that the defenders are now writing complete fiction. They used to take the bare threads of excuses that CIG would play out and run with them. But CIG's been forced into some kind of "Honest accounting" mode in the last year, and the honest account is that.... they basically can't accomplish anything. Rather than see the writing on the wall, guys like Kazan and logicalChimp are retreating further and further into this "Super-secret features that for some reason they won't tell us about." Nowhere is there any kind of logic about why something as dry and pointless as "Server side object container streaming" would be hidden. Nowhere do they explain why it would take more than a half-dozen people even for the most complex system that CIG could envision. What do they think 500 artists and level designers have to do with back-end code? Why on earth would they do feature after feature on chefs and towels while they have some kind of tech revolution cooking? It's insane- in a very literal way, the things they're imagining do not correspond to reality anymore.

We've reached what feels like the final stage, to me. The cultists are rocking back and forth in the cabin as everything falls apart around them, hugging their knees and chanting to themselves "Krusty is coming. Krusty is coming."

Sabreseven posted:

You mean the secret 'dev build' of the progress bar V2, which is being developed with total transparency behind closed doors, which has been delayed because the guy responsible for making the high end coffee for the guy who is working on 'progress bars V3' got stuck in the garage door mechanism while bike riding and broke both his wrists because he was distracted by the strangler getting tickled by a lawyer with grabby hands, who was at the time responding to DS's FUD during July so the pipeline is still being developed, but the concept video for it is in greybox stage and just needs SSOCS in order for the bartender to mo-cap subsumption AI so that Mark Hamil can give his best performance as "Old Man" while a thumb absolves itself and CitizenCon can happen, this is all dependant on 'item v5' and 'concierge v4' being just around the corner and in concept stage before the alpha releases internally to testers who shitcan the whole thing completely succesfully into a vertical slice.

And thusly,

fin.
Keep going, I'm almost there :circlefap:

Kikas
Oct 30, 2012

Gotta agree with Kazan here, the dude has no idea what he's talking about.
After all, with no defined gameplay, you can't define bugs, therefore Star Citizen is bug free.

MedicineHut
Feb 25, 2016


That was a good one, almost fell for it!

Raskolnikov
Nov 25, 2003


very good ma'am, your space hotdog.

Sillybones
Aug 10, 2013

go away,
spooky skeleton,
go away
How does someone get it in their head that programming is easy? And that they are suddenly in over supply, when quite the opposite is true..

Ghostlight
Sep 25, 2009

maybe for one second you can pause; try to step into another person's perspective, and understand that a watermelon is cursing me



what could be difficult about typing numbers into a computer i say while barely maanging to type letters into one

One in the Bum
Apr 25, 2014

Hair Elf

MedicineHut posted:

The real question that will gently caress up your brain is, who of these 2 is the fudster?

both. They're both deep cover goons destroying star citizen from the inside

Solarin
Nov 15, 2007


stupid aggressive lethality is my favorite.

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Beexoffel
Oct 4, 2015

Herald of the Stimpire

Saw posted:

Any truth to this being a leaked page from Robert's script?

quote:

{Game response tree GLRT1aef - select random}
A. GoSub PusherGivesHardAssButFriendlyReminderToKeepYourWitsAboutYou [todo: more mocap of crew letting player know how lucky they are that they got off relatively easy]
B. GoSub PusherSmiles {todo: get animators to alter mocaps of Sandi's smile to look more human}, player is allowed to resume control of character's motion.
C. GoSub Pusher demotes <Player>. One ship at random {todo: make random==highest cost} is taken from player.

Star Citizen: player is allowed to resume control of character's motion.

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