- tactlessbastard
- Feb 4, 2001
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Godspeed, post
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Fun Shoe
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I just don't agree. Your one experience is bad because that dude crossed a line. I've done it dozens of times, over years, with employees or with my own bosses. It has never once caused any kind of problem.
In fact, it one time allowed a direct report of mine enough courage to tell me about a guy at work who was harassing her outside work, when I had no way to know otherwise.
I would never drink with my direct reports because I'm a degenerate alcoholic and they are nowhere near my level.
(26F)Wife cheated on (29M)me with my (55M)dad, she wants us to take a break, but i want to fix the issue
Gat drat talk about being on another level
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Sep 9, 2019 01:27
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 13, 2024 22:00
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- MarcusSA
- Sep 23, 2007
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This one is just bizarre and I'm not entirely sure how I feel about it. I am totally weirded out by what H did, but I think W is also oversexualizing something that probably isn't sexual.
My (26/f) husband (27/m) took his sisters (33/f) boob to help breastfeed her baby. I’m worried he’s attracted to his sister sexually.
That’s pretty fuckin weird but I doubt it’s sexual.
It’s fuckin weird though.
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Sep 9, 2019 01:31
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- Barudak
- May 7, 2007
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(26F)Wife cheated on (29M)me with my (55M)dad, she wants us to take a break, but i want to fix the issue
What an incredibly depressing fetish.
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Sep 9, 2019 01:32
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- AARD VARKMAN
- May 17, 1993
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My (26/f) husband (27/m) took his sisters (33/f) boob to help breastfeed her baby. I’m worried he’s attracted to his sister sexually.
I'm really curious if he was a much older brother or something. He could be anything from totally conditioned to assist with new kids and breastfeeding, or it could easily be either a fetish or a weird upbringing. This feels like a thing where, insanely, you should actually talk to him about it. Either way it doesn't read as cheating.
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Sep 9, 2019 01:36
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- Peaceful Anarchy
- Sep 18, 2005
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sXe
I am the math man.
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I'm really curious if he was a much older brother or something. He could be anything from totally conditioned to assist with new kids and breastfeeding, or it could easily be either a fetish or a weird upbringing. This feels like a thing where, insanely, you should actually talk to him about it. Either way it doesn't read as cheating.
quote:Then he says, I did this with my wife so I kinda know how to help.
I was FLOORED, and slightly disgusted. I mean of course I am pissed, but I try and keep my cool. The whole time we were eating I just couldn’t stop replaying it in my head, maybe I was overreacting, maybe he was just being nice. After she left, my husband and I got in a huge argument, he thought It was no big deal, but I did. That’s something he has done for me, he shouldn’t do it for anyone else
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Sep 9, 2019 01:46
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- Pinecone Sample
- Oct 12, 2010
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THIS ACCOUNT HAS BEEN SEIZED
by the United States Federal Bureau of Investigation in accordance with a seizure warrant issued pursuant to 69 U.S.C Sec. 420
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He's 26 and sister is 33 so I don't think it's something he's just used to doing. It sounds like something he learned to do with his wife which he doesn't (I hope) see as being sexual, but she did.
So they did talk about it, and he said he was just being helpful, and I can imagine a guy being proud he learned to help his wife breastfeed and getting the chance to show off his skill(?). Sister doesn't seem weirded out by it, so I'd go with harmless weird family.
Then the older brother shouted "FOOD TAX!" and insisted he gets to have some of the breastmilk
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Sep 9, 2019 01:49
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- AARD VARKMAN
- May 17, 1993
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So they did talk about it, and he said he was just being helpful, and I can imagine a guy being proud he learned to help his wife breastfeed and getting the chance to show off his skill(?). Sister doesn't seem weirded out by it, so I'd go with harmless weird family.
I missed the thing about him doing it for his wife. I think it's much more likely he's well intentioned but stupid/insensitive. He probably left the situation proud of being a good relation and got bombed by her out of nowhere, in his mind. God just talk to your S.O.s about your feelings, it would solve half the thread.
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Sep 9, 2019 01:53
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- Pinecone Sample
- Oct 12, 2010
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THIS ACCOUNT HAS BEEN SEIZED
by the United States Federal Bureau of Investigation in accordance with a seizure warrant issued pursuant to 69 U.S.C Sec. 420
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As in human or animal? For a number of reasons it better be the latter.
Human
Filter me and go back a few pages
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Sep 9, 2019 02:10
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- goethe.cx
- Apr 23, 2014
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Part of me wonders if she's been trying to break it up for months, but he's been going "no, no, you can't do this to me right now, it's not fair"...so she went full-flamethrower to nuke the relationship in a way that would make (almost) anybody finally agree to let her out.
Yeah the poor woman felt trapped and had no other options than to gently caress his dad. Jesus Christ what’s with these sexist fanfics
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Sep 9, 2019 03:11
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- Ebola Roulette
- Sep 13, 2010
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No matter what you win lose ragepiss.
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This one is just bizarre and I'm not entirely sure how I feel about it. I am totally weirded out by what H did, but I think W is also oversexualizing something that probably isn't sexual.
My (26/f) husband (27/m) took his sisters (33/f) boob to help breastfeed her baby. I’m worried he’s attracted to his sister sexually.
Ugh this is the result of sexualizing something that shouldn't be sexual at all.
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Sep 9, 2019 03:15
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- Motronic
- Nov 6, 2009
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Ugh this is the result of sexualizing something that shouldn't be sexual at all.
Yes.....but.....it's still a weird boundary. Sexual or not.
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Sep 9, 2019 03:17
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- welcome to hell
- Jun 9, 2006
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This one isn't funny just a mixture of  and 
Wife (38F) is convinced that she is pregnant even though that every pregnancy test (store-bought and medical) comes back negative. It's taking a toll on our mariage because she thinks I am going to abandon her and "our twins"
quote:
I called up our primary doctor and told him about the problem . He seemed very concerned and wanted us to come see him the next morning . He said it was important to be gentle but not feed into her delusions. I sat her down and we talked. All she wanted to talk about is when i would get the nursery started and that we were on a time crunch, and how she has found a perfect color for the room, how she wants me to be more involved in her pregnancy . I tried to be very calm but i was very perturbed by seeing her that way. I asked her to go to the doctor with me tommorow. She said yes, that she wanted to check on the babies either ways. Now i took some advice and words you gave me about being calm and asking a bit why she think she is pregnant without calling her delusional . So I did. She kept changing subjects or saying that " A mother just feels it. You wouldn't know how it is " then i said that i loved her really much that i would never think of leaving her but we needed to go to the doctor to confirm her "gut feeling ". She got very agitated and was crying telling me that if I wanted to leave her i should simply leave but I shouldn't call her a liar.
Somehow i managed to calm her down enough for her to go to sleep.
After she did i went on her computer. I do never snoop on her. But i remembered a commenter pointing out forums about cryptic pregnancy and so i went for the look out . Oh boy. She was in 2 facebook groups. One was a normal Mommy facebook group and the other was a group about women that believed they were pregnant. In the "normal" group she would post updates about her symptoms and pictures of her "belly" and her story about how she was almost not able to have children but thats to the "grace of god that kissed her tummy" the "gift of life was given to her " and how she was compensated for all this years of suffering with twins. in the other group the women were quite literally, and exuse me here , loving insane. They were feeding in each others delusions. A woman said that she was almost 2 years pregnant and how sometimes it just takes longer. My wife would post there complaining about doctors that do not take her seriously and about me. So many women were making her fear that i would leave. Saying things like men can not stick to a woman . Many recounted their stories about how their marriages broke down because their spouses could not "handle the pregnancy".
I was really loving scared. I researched phantom pregnancies and i read somewhere that that could also be a sign of schizophrenia. So to say the least i could not sleep. I was and am still very afraid of losing her. She woke up and I tried to act like nothing was wrong . We were going to the doctor. And it was as if nothing had happened yesterday. She was convinced that we were going to a pregnancy check up. Things got really bad when we began talking to the doctor. He was really tactful when talking to my wife. He tried to explain her that it was medically impossible that she was pregnant. We tried to show her tests, the ultrasound we did the day before but nothing. She got more agitated and began to cry and the scream at me for making her look like a crazy person . She began bouncing back and forth and holding her head with both hands . We could not calm her she went in on a full on panic attack . She could not breathe. The doctor laid her down and tried giving her some medicine for her to relax but it did not help as he didn't have the necessary tools to treat a panic attack that was that bad . She had to go to the hospital where they took care of her. Did an EKG to exclude that she was suffering a heart attack.
At that point i really had no other option than to inquire about Involuntary commit. So I could not do it myself . I needed my doctors statement that she was a danger to herself and others and he had to initiate the process of an involuntary examination of 72 hours . After that we will have to submit a written statement to the court to determine wether on not she can stay there "against her will". So far i have submitted all her posts in both facebook groups aswell as the test we did with timestamps when possible . My wife is 2 days in the 3 days examination and i have no contact to her. When i last her she was furious with me. She said i was taking away her freedom which I am. i fell horrible, dirty and useless. She is so mad at me. I feel like I am abandoning her and don't know how she will ever forgive me this. I love her with all my heart. I am afraid of what will happend if the courts decide that i can't commit her, how our life will be affected . I feel like i failed to protect her. At this point I am just rambeling . Sorry for the long post i guess i just need to vent because i have no one else to really turn to that just wants to listen . I feel judged by everyone and pittied ... i just hate it . Sorry for spelling mistakes
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Sep 9, 2019 03:18
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- a very large fish
- Oct 18, 2012
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I've done it dozens of times, over years, with employees or with my own bosses. It has never once caused any kind of problem.
This is the same logic drunk drivers use. Good luck.
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Sep 9, 2019 03:22
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- Motronic
- Nov 6, 2009
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Me (24F) with my husband of 8 months (25M), together 3 years total. He is more religious than I am, we haven't had sex yet. [new]
submitted 4 hours ago by ChristianHusbWont
quote:
We're both Christian and met in church. poster note: SURPRISE!
I consider myself more moderate. I definitely believe in God and my faith, but I don't feel that EVERYTHING the Bible teaches is relevant to life in today's world. Our church isn't super strict or fundamental either. Of course some people who go there are, but that's their choice and not because the church is preaching hellfire and brimstone.
I had 1 sex partner before (I planned on) having sex with my husband. He was my BF since 8th grade, we lost our virginity to each other and broke up after HS. We realized we were just growing apart and going in different directions. I don't regret it or him, he was actually a perfect first boyfriend and I feel he shaped a lot of what I looked for in a relationship.
When I started seeing "Kevin" and we got the stage of discussing sex, he seemed ok with me having already had sex although he had not. I also respected that. I personally believe that as long as sex is undertaken with love, communication, commitment and responsibly, how could any God have an issue with that? We weren't put here to live in a bubble and deny the biological drives given to us BY God.
But I also respect other people's views and rights to do with their body and spirit as they see fit. Kevin wanted to wait until marriage. I told him honestly I wasn't sure, but that I really liked him and while I don't wait until marriage, I also wouldn't want to have sex early in the relationship so we would see how things went.
Kevin proposed on our 2 year anniversary and we were married shortly after. We had a small outdoor ceremony officiated by our pastor with just our best friends and close family - about 30 people total. It was perfect. Low key, intimate and peaceful. Zero "wedding stress".
We left on our honeymoon the next day. Kevin said he was airsick and wanted to just lay low at the hotel that night. No problem, people sometimes don't feel well. We went to bed early and nothing sexual happened.
The next night he said he must have had mild food poisoning and didn't feel well. 3rd night was a headache. Fourth the headache was still there.
By the 5th night I kind of called him out. I said I'd planned on making love with my new husband and if he was nervous I understood, but then please just tell me that and we'll talk through it and work out things we're both comfortable with, that we didn't have to have actual sex right away, we could just start by making out and doing whatever we both liked and stopping if at any point one of us wanted to.
He felt bad for letting me down but said he hadn't really felt well the whole trip, he wasn't stalling, he didn't know what was wrong. He said maybe he came down with something or he just wasn't travelling well but he didn't want our first time to be when he felt like garbage. I was disappointed but I was glad we talked.
In news that should shock no one, it's been 8 months and we haven't had sex. He seemed so rational about it while we were dating but since marriage there's either a problem, we'll try making out, he doesn't get an erection and starts beating himself up and I end up consoling him, we fight, or he avoids the topic.
I told him straight up the other day that I didn't get married to be celibate, we have half a relationship, if he's gay or asexual then tell me and we can part ways civilly, of it's a medical issue then GET IT TREATED and if it's an emotional issue we'll go to counseling but if we get to a year with no action I'm done.
He scheduled a counseling appointment for 2 weeks out. With a religious counselor. I love my faith and it's a big part of my life but I'm hesitant to seek faith based counseling on this. I'd rather see a secular counselor who's going to keep faith out of it. Faith is a PART of my life, not my WHOLE life and it's definitely not standing in the way of me having a marriage, at least not from my end.
He's done what I asked him to do, so I don't feel it's entirely fair to say it's not good enough. But I really do feel it's not good enough.
He also hasn't scheduled with a medical doctor to address all these "illnesses" that seem to crop up around bedtime.
tl;dr I feel like religion has ruined my marriage 8 months in. We haven't had sex and he's scheduled with a faith based counselor. I gave him an ultimatum and counseling was one option but I don't think we need MORE religion in this marriage. Should I see what happens or just leave and find a partner eventually who can balance hos faith with real life and a real relationship?
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Sep 9, 2019 03:29
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- Motronic
- Nov 6, 2009
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Micropeen. Calling it now.
Username/post combo! Also I didn't think of that but I hope you're right.
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Sep 9, 2019 03:39
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- MarcusSA
- Sep 23, 2007
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it doesn't seem to be going very well
gently caress....
Not even sure a 72 hour hold is gonna fix this. She probably needs much longer more intense therapy.
That’s fuckin terrible.
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Sep 9, 2019 03:41
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- Barudak
- May 7, 2007
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Pregnancy madness husband unironically needs to get out. Dude is not equipped for that level of crazy.
Micropeen. Calling it now.
Goddammit no one is gonna take the other side of this bet and I and I want in
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Sep 9, 2019 03:42
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- Fantastic Flyer
- Aug 9, 2017
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it doesn't seem to be going very well
That is totally brutal, holy crap.
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Sep 9, 2019 03:45
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- Motronic
- Nov 6, 2009
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Goddammit no one is gonna take the other side of this bet and I and I want in
I was just thinking religion broke brain, but honesty.....this makes for the best odds and is still entirely compatible with what I was first thinking.
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Sep 9, 2019 03:47
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- The Lone Badger
- Sep 24, 2007
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gently caress....
Not even sure a 72 hour hold is gonna fix this. She probably needs much longer more intense therapy.
That’s fuckin terrible.
Sometimes schizophrenia responds very wil to medication and it's just a matter of getting her to keep taking it.
(other times it doesn't)
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Sep 9, 2019 03:50
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- Propaniac
- Nov 28, 2000
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SUSHI ROULETTO!
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College Slice
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I was looking for something else and stumbled on this amazing post on /r/divorce from last year:
6 month later...divorcing my husband was a HUGE mistake 
quote:This one is long, but worth it for eveyone to read...
If I could give anyone a piece of advice for divorce it would be to not do it under normal circumstances. If your spouse is beating you or threatening you or your children then of course get out and fast.
In my case there was no abuse. We were together for 8 years that was mostly good and we have 4 kids. Right around 5 years I got a promotion at work and i got it in my head that my XH was dragging me down, or at least holding me back from more success and a better life. We never had a lot of money but with my promotion I was now making more than he was. I started working longer hours and at the same time his hours were cut so he was at home more. I really began to resent him because he was home and because he got to spend time with our kids. Most nights when I got home they were already getting ready for bed if not already sleeping. After a few months of my new job it was clear to me that things were not going well at home without me there. Some nights the dishes werent done when I got home or the kids hadnt eaten or whatever else I could think of to be mad at him about. It really didnt matter. He kept saying that he would try harder but that it was hard being home all the time. That always made me really mad.
For the next couple years things kept getting worse. My hours weren't any shorter and his were on and off fulltime. There was no convenient time for him to be working full time because of my hours, but we also needed the money. Whenever he would tell me that he could get extra hours I would always complain and the less hours he worked the more I complained that he wasnt bringing in enough money. Whenever he brought up the contradiction I would tell him that he needed to figure it out. I knew that it would bother him so I started saying that a lot and for everything that I could. I really started to resent him and I pulled away from him. I knew that it was hurting him but I didnt care. If he didnt want to be hurt then he would at least try to make me happy. I used that same thing to justify when I started to talk to another guy at work. I thought he was just a friend but talking at work turned into texting at home and then pictures and videos and then trying to sneak some alone time with him. I knew that it was wrong but it made me feel so alive, and my husband had not made me feel like that in years. I was tired of being unhappy and I was doing this for me. The worst was the night that I came home at a reasonable time and found that he had cleaned the whole house, cooked the whole family dinner and picked out a movie for all of us to watch together. This would have made me swoon a couple years earlier, but that night I couldn't even look at him and I pretended to be sick. I spent the rest of the night in bed while he waited on me and checked on me and even made me different food and brought it to me in bed. It made me feel terrible, and then it made me angry that he made me feel that way and by the end of the night I was texting with the other guy.
Over the next month or two from that night it did not matter what he did. He was wrong just for breathing most days. He would get so upset with how I was treating him and I would just wait and egg him on into losing it because i knew it would happen eventually. After most of the fights we had he would apologize for whatever I told him he did wrong if there even was something, but I never did. I would usually find a way to make him feel even worse. I knew that I was right because he was wrong and that was all that mattered to me. I even pretended that I didnt care when he found out about my relationship with the guy from work. It really destroyed me inside to see him holding back tears, but I wasnt going to let him see that. He was at his weakest and that was when I chose to tell him that I wanted a divorce. I could almost hear his heart shattering inside his chest. He talked and fought and said that we could work through it together. I really wasnt interested in fixing our marriage, but i mostly ended things with the other guy but only because i knew i could get it back if I wanted it.
I could see that he was trying and occasionally i would let him know, but for the most part I kept being a huge bitch to him for any and all reasons that I could think of. I'm not sure how much more the man could have done to make me happy besides finding a job that paid enough for me to not have to work at all. He said that he was looking, but looking and finding are 2 different things. It was around this time that I discovered this group and a few others. I started posting things about him, from my perspective only, and I got so much positive feedback for how I was feeling that I knew I was right. The more I posted the more validation that I got. It wasn't just me who knew that XH wasn't worth keeping around. I had the whole internet telling me how terrible he is. I started saying awful things to him and even outright ignoring him. I was so confident with mine and everyone elses opinion that I contacted a lawyer and within a couple weeks had filed for divorce. I continued to use this site and a couple others to validate my feelings and for encouragement to go through with it, and finally it was done.
It went pretty smoothly. XH didnt ask for much besides to not get divorced and to try to work it all out. I didnt care about that though. He was broken, but I was free. I could do whatever I wanted without having to feel any guilt or answer to anybody. It was an amazing feeling of freedom. It didnt last long though. In the first month after he moved out I missed garbage day 3 times. There was also rarely a single clean dish and the laundry sat in piles so long that I had to start doing the sniff test to see if it could be worn again. I also never saw my kids more miserable. My oldest had seen some of the messages from the other guy months earlier and she knew that XH still wanted to try to work it out. It didnt take her long to stop talking to me at all except to say that she wanted to go to XH house. The others all told me that they wanted to live with XH too. I did my best to try to make them happy, but I ended up just buying them toys all the time and the happiness only lasted minutes. I also was having a lot of trouble with work. Being alone I couldnt work all those extra hours that I was expected to. I finally gave in and starting calling XH to watch the kids. He would always come over as soon as he could and he always asked me if i needed anything. When I would get home I would find clean dishes and laundry and even dinner sometimes. He would never say too much after I got home. He would just say to call him if i needed anything and leave. One night he took out the garbage and brought it to the curb because it was garbage night and I forgot again. He always looked so sad when it was time to go.
Finally after a couple months my friends convinced me to go out on a date. It was for dinner and a movie and I was excited and hopeful, but at dinner I started getting a feeling of overwhelming guilt. It got so bad that I ended up not even going to the movie. A week and about a million tears later I was on a therapists couch. I told her everything that had happened starting with the promotion that I got at work. She did not agree with me or with any of the encouragment to divorce that I got. I ended up in her office 2 and sometimes 3 times a week, and the more that I talked to prove that I was right, the more that I started to see how wrong I was. It was truely heartbreaking. I dont know if I cried as much in my whole life as i did in the first month in her office. After about 2 thousand dollars of therapy sessions I learned that my XH had his faults, but I figured out that mine were so much worse. I did so many awful things and said awful things that I wouldnt want to be with me, but he did. I still remember him asking me in the meeting with the lawyer to please not go through with it. I did go through with it though, and then later I bragged on here how great it felt. I was so wrong, and now I can see it.
A couple weeks ago I went outside with him when he was leaving the house. I asked him about getting back together. When he looked at me his eyes were full of tears and a couple went down his cheeks. He told me that he didnt know if he could. He said that the pain has been too much for too long and that if we got back together that I might just turn around and do it to him again. He said that he always thought that I would realize how much he loved me and stop up until i signed the divorce papers and let out a big over exaggerated sigh of relief. He said that hurt him more than anything else and that he doesnt know if he can ever trust me again. I dont blame him. I destroyed a man who looking back was a great husband. I deprived my kids of having a great father in the house with them and I took his kids away from him. And me, the one who pushed for the divorce expecting happiness and a life of freedom, spend all my free time sitting at home or sitting on a therapists couch.
Please dont just take the advice of anyone on this site or any other about getting a divorce. If your marriage is bad look at yourself first and see if you can make changes. This is advice for men and women. Getting divorced is not fun. Being divorced is not fun. And seeing your husband broken and your children never happy because of your actions is the most painful experience that I can imagine.
I wish all of you well and hope that you will give your marriages a second chance
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Sep 9, 2019 03:55
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- snergle
- Aug 3, 2013
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A kind little mouse!
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Micropeen. Calling it now.
it says right in there gay asexual with a medical disorder which i assume is micropenis as well.
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Sep 9, 2019 03:58
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- Louisgod
- Sep 25, 2003
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Always Watching
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Bread Liar
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Legend of Zelda: The Phantom Babymass
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Sep 9, 2019 04:01
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- Motronic
- Nov 6, 2009
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I can only hope this is some incel fakepost because otherwise yeesh
I think this thread has broken my brain to immediately think that. And I'm gonna stick with it because otherwise it's just too depressing.
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Sep 9, 2019 04:17
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- pentyne
- Nov 7, 2012
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God drat.....
That’s a rough read. She was absolutely right about the internet echo chamber though Jesus.
How is "get therapy" not the first automatic response to every reddit advice post? Either it'll work or the person is so broken that it won't matter because they just want someone to cheer lead their lovely behavior.
Probably a major contributing factor in a lot of destructive behavior. You can find a support group for anything online, and the problem with expressing yourself online is that the other side is getting a completely biased narrative so however they tell the story is geared for people to agree with them and reaffirm what they already believe. Then even if they get criticized they can always look at the positive comments and just dismiss any naysayers as not knowing the "full" story.
Wonder what that guys "problems" were. For sure being super conciliatory and letting someone walk all over you isn't a sign of a healthy mindset. Once she realized she could just endlessly treat him like crap and continued and he didn't stand up then there was no reason not to escalate her behavior.
I think this thread has broken my brain to immediately think that. And I'm gonna stick with it because otherwise it's just too depressing.
I had a conversation with a coworker about this. There is a ton of fake bullshit on reddit but that doesn't mean things like that don't still happen in the world.
I've known a few people in relationships who just get bored/angry/entitled and start treating the other person like crap. People get get broken pretty badly by long term relationships and act in ways they'd never expect if they don't directly address issues of conflicts and emotional problems.
I was talking to someone who left a relationship after 10 years that was described by her in terms that screamed abuse and red flags, and all her friends were married going on 5-10 yrs plus and so many of them were petty, controlling, bored and cheating, or just always trying to have a singles night with her and cheat on their partners/get revenge for getting cheated on. This isn't one of those "monogamy is flawed" things, just that a lot of people just love the idea of being in a relationship so much they overlook the red flags and lovely behavior just to avoid being single again.
pentyne fucked around with this message at 04:28 on Sep 9, 2019
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Sep 9, 2019 04:18
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 13, 2024 22:00
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- sexpig by night
- Sep 8, 2011
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by Azathoth
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"So anyway doc my marriage was unhappy, our schedules never lined up and he never actually seemed to want to change the things that bothered me and it just seemed like we couldn't get on the same page. Anyway I feel kinda bad now that I'm dating and finding it harder than the unhappy but at least constant life I had before."
"Pft wow sounds like you're a bitch and you never shoulda gotten a divorce, lady."
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Sep 9, 2019 04:28
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Sep 9, 2019 01:27
