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Ugly In The Morning posted:DID is diagnosed by a vanishingly small amount of doctors, which points to the possibility that those therapists are, whether intentionally or not, creating that behavior in their patients. It’s not a universally accepted diagnosis at all. Good, I'm glad we could agree
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Sep 21, 2019 16:25
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Mooseykins posted:Not see her in daylight? Were all these plans in loving darkness or something? You can still see fine lines and wrinkles under artificial light, what the hell? My GF is a real sweetheart, it's a shame she can only find time to go on dates outdoors on overcast nights or new moons.
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Sep 21, 2019 16:47
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Collapsing Farts posted:abuse is a strong word Looking forward to your loving inexplicable probe in two months.
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Sep 21, 2019 16:48
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Yeah that is straight up deliberate manipulation.
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Sep 21, 2019 16:52
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DragQueenofAngmar posted:WIBTA for asking my fiancé to take his cat to the pound He's been with her for a maximum of 18 months, and they don't even live together. Cat you've loved for years or girlfriend doesn't seem like an obvious choice there. Though he does seem to be the rear end in a top hat for trying to make both work and risking injuring the child in the meantime.
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Sep 21, 2019 17:00
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charity rereg posted:
I disagree that in this specific case he was the rear end in a top hat, giving the stuff to a child is not a get out of jail free card for stealing other people's property, even if it is just icecream. Most of them are probably fiction but there are a TON of posts about entitled parents who really do think they can get away with all sorts suit if it benefits their kid. Lady needed to learn a lesson, kid was collateral in a conflict she initiated.
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Sep 21, 2019 17:25
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Smirking_Serpent posted:My (25f) boyfriend (27m) made me feel like absolute crap about my appearance, and then when I asked why he's with me then, he said "babe it isn't all about looks" and seemed offended. I feel so bad for this poor lady and I hope she gets far away from that abusive monster and severs. No one deserves to be treated that way and destroyed on the inside. 
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Sep 21, 2019 17:25
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Fatkraken posted:I disagree that in this specific case he was the rear end in a top hat, giving the stuff to a child is not a get out of jail free card for stealing other people's property, even if it is just icecream. Most of them are probably fiction but there are a TON of posts about entitled parents who really do think they can get away with all sorts suit if it benefits their kid. Lady needed to learn a lesson, kid was collateral in a conflict she initiated. if you make a kid “collateral damage” over 2 dollars worth of ice cream, you’re an rear end in a top hat
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Sep 21, 2019 17:36
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DragQueenofAngmar posted:WIBTA for asking my fiancé to take his cat to the pound yta. always, to ask someone to rehome a pet, every single time. bitch
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Sep 21, 2019 17:42
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DragQueenofAngmar posted:WIBTA for asking my fiancé to take his cat to the pound Edit: I had written some stuff here about slow introduction of cats to other cats, but this is better thought. charity rereg posted:That's extremely non standard behavior for a house cat - have they been in contact with the vet? There is a mental thing that causes them to feel fear all of the time and lash out really violently (beyond standard under stimulated cat "attacks" which are usually just boredom or neglect) and they can/do get medication for it. You know what, you're right. The cat has the opportunity to stay away from the kid and just isn't, which is weird. Alternate theory: it might not understand what the wiggly thing is and think it's protecting the adults from the unknown creature. Maybe the cat knows something they don't know. Bored fucked around with this message at 17:59 on Sep 21, 2019 |
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Sep 21, 2019 17:42
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I'm honestly on team ice cream roommate. Edit i dunno maybe offer to let the lovely mom buy the ice cream from you, but literally just letting someone steal from you in front of your face isn't going to be a good idea. Hellblazer187 fucked around with this message at 17:55 on Sep 21, 2019 |
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Sep 21, 2019 17:51
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This story isn't worth reading in total because it's a complete slog, but this one paragraph is hilarious to me. UPDATE on the boyfriend who was using Tinder to make friends (og post linked): I dumped him, but it was a whole mess from there. I’m just so sad. quote:I stumbled upon him the next day at the gym and I begged him to talk to me about it. He kept hitting me with, “53% of girls use to Tinder to make friends so statistically you’re wrong.” Anyway, I pester him and he ended up buying me Subway. My boss cancelled my plans so I asked him what he was doing, if he maybe wanted to get high or something. Part of the reason he agreed to buy me Subway was because I told him he could keep my weed if he did.
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Sep 21, 2019 17:57
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Lol of course that's what reddit laser focused in on [/quote] She had a 9 month old son, is currently engaged to a new guy who isnt the father. Sure it could be innocuous, but best case scenario he started dating her while she was pregnant or they had a 6 month courtship at best before deciding to get married. Given hes already gone through a messy marriage and divorce maybe rushing into it again with the caveat of "get rid of the animal you love" is a pretty strong recipe for disaster.
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Sep 21, 2019 17:58
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AreWeDrunkYet posted:Cat you've loved for years or girlfriend doesn't seem like an obvious choice there. Only if you are loving the cat
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Sep 21, 2019 18:12
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pentyne posted:She had a 9 month old son, is currently engaged to a new guy who isnt the father. she could've been raped, you know.
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Sep 21, 2019 18:16
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Ugly In The Morning posted:DID is diagnosed by a vanishingly small amount of doctors, which points to the possibility that those therapists are, whether intentionally or not, creating that behavior in their patients. It’s not a universally accepted diagnosis at all. I had a therapist who believed in DID as a legit diagnosis. I know this, because he told me about the patient. While making sure I knew he couldn't go into a lot of detail, because they were a somewhat famous person. While giving the profession, and the fact they were trans. And the fact I obviously know they location they're from.
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Sep 21, 2019 18:17
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AITA for calling off my wedding because my STBH asked for a prenup? He makes close to 200K a year while I make 50K a year. My family is dead broke, his family is loaded. I've never asked him for money or to pay my bills. He's the one who wants to do pay for everything and gets mad at me if I pay a bill using MY money. We even argued about when we have kids, he wants me to stay home while I want to work. I love my job. I'm frugal. I haven't been to a mall in 15 years and shop at Big Lots or Dollar Tree. I've never got attached to his wealth. He tells me that it's common and not personal but it's insulting. It makes me feel like he's using me in someway. I understand someone wanting to protect themselves, but he wants me to give up my career to be a housewife and leave me in a situation where he can divorce me and leave me out to dry.
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Sep 21, 2019 18:19
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AITA for blowing up on and ignoring my boyfriend for always using the N- word? So here’s what happens. We’re both white. My boyfriend repeatedly uses the “N” word with a hard er ending constantly. He thinks it’s funny. I find this extremely repulsive and can’t stand it one bit. When I try to tell him to stop, he constantly says “I don’t mean it like that” but I’ve had enough. It’s always used by him in a derogatory way. There’s no other way to use that awful word. I completely blew up on him earlier today. Yelling and I stormed off and I’ve ignored him most of the day. He compared using that word to calling someone stupid. I absolutely lost it. Am I the rear end in a top hat if I let this get to me this bad? Did I overreact? It’s really making me question our relationship. Also I never knew of him saying this word before we started talking/dating.
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Sep 21, 2019 18:19
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InediblePenguin posted:she could've been raped, you know. That has no bearing on the guy rushing into another marriage when the previous one destroyed him to the point his cat was a major emotional support that his new fiancee wants gone.
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Sep 21, 2019 18:20
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AITA for doing a "nice guy" when a girl wouldn't date me? I met up with a girl I used to be friends with many years ago. We stopped talking because she started dating a guy and brushing me off to the point where she didn't need to keep contact with me anymore. They broke up, and she came running back and I blew her off. I felt so lovely about it because I heard much later on she had depression not long after and struggled making friends. We met up recently and I apologized, she accepted. Not gonna lie, I was open to whatever happened. Whether she wants to be friends or date, I wasn't going to bail on friendship. She made it clear she had a BF which sucks but I'm OK with. Eventually we started texting daily and hanging every week. Something odd I noticed was she would always complain about having no money. She would suggest we'd go to mid priced places to eat, but then say "I didn't get paid from work so won't order anything". And I just end up eating by myself. I've bought her food before when she was unemployed but she has a job now. Anyway she recently told me that when she was broke she went on tinder dates with guys to get a free dinner. That same day she brought up to me which places in my city do the best steak. I told her I don't eat out often unless its a special occasion. She asked again about 5mins later and I changed the subject. We were supposed to hang out most of the day but she cut it off after 2hrs to go home after she dragged me to a restaurant she likes and we didn't get anything. She let me know she only had $25 in her account that has to last 2 days. When she got her uber she started to cry. I messaged her saying this just friends thing doesn't work for me and I don't want to go out for meals anymore and she just goes "sure, thanks for letting me know". I text her a week later and ask how her week went. She didn't reply. After that I sent an angry text basically accusing her of trying to push my buttons to get free stuff from me and the friendship is officially over. AITA?
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Sep 21, 2019 18:21
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Bored posted:You know what, you're right. The cat has the opportunity to stay away from the kid and just isn't, which is weird. Back in college one of the on-campus apartments had a cat that had stayed there being passed to the next person to move in for years. We suspect she'd been abused at some point, because she desperately wanted affection and would cuddle up to people but the moment you made any move toward her to reciprocate she'd lash out. My friend who lived there found her a forever home with his aunt after he left, I never found out if she mellowed.
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Sep 21, 2019 18:23
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pentyne posted:That has no bearing on the guy rushing into another marriage when the previous one destroyed him to the point his cat was a major emotional support that his new fiancee wants gone. Hi! If you reread my post, I quoted the part of your post I was replying to. Responding, like this, with "well, your response has nothing to do with the part you're not responding to" isn't a useful or intelligent reply  I don't see anything in the reddit post that indicates an actual length of time their relationship has been ongoing or how long ago the man's previous marriage is; the OP's use of "we've been together a little bit" may be idiomatic (for instance, there are American idioms in which "it's been a minute" can mean, with equal probability such that meaning MUST be determined or inferred by context, "it's been a very short amount of time" or "it's been a pretty long amount of time"). I only took issue with the fact that your imagination only supplied "it's something innocuous OR they've only been dating since after the child was born." They could have already been together when the baby was conceived; there are other possibilities that don't actually reflect poorly upon either of them.
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Sep 21, 2019 18:29
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Araenna posted:I had a therapist who believed in DID as a legit diagnosis. I know this, because he told me about the patient. While making sure I knew he couldn't go into a lot of detail, because they were a somewhat famous person. While giving the profession, and the fact they were trans. And the fact I obviously know they location they're from. Were they as terrible as that total ethical breach implied?
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Sep 21, 2019 18:30
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Araenna posted:I had a therapist who believed in DID as a legit diagnosis. I know this, because he told me about the patient. While making sure I knew he couldn't go into a lot of detail, because they were a somewhat famous person. While giving the profession, and the fact they were trans. And the fact I obviously know they location they're from. At which point you got a new therapist, right?
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Sep 21, 2019 18:33
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Ugly In The Morning posted:Were they as terrible as that total ethical breach implied? Yes. I got my recommendation to a doctor for hormones from them and immediately bailed. They actually said they thought that once I started hormones, I'd end up realizing I was a trans man and not nonbinary.
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Sep 21, 2019 18:33
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Smirking_Serpent posted:AITA for doing a "nice guy" when a girl wouldn't date me? You're an rear end in a top hat and a chump
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Sep 21, 2019 18:39
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Smirking_Serpent posted:AITA for calling off my wedding because my STBH asked for a prenup? NTA. The give up your career when we have kids thing is so loving toxic. My wife was telling me about a woman she met in one of her craft classes. The woman gave up her career to be a stay at home mom. Her husband is some kind of middle management business administrator dork. Prior to giving up her career, she was a SURGEON. OP is a champion for calling the whole thing off.
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Sep 21, 2019 18:49
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Hellblazer187 posted:NTA. The give up your career when we have kids thing is so loving toxic. Up until the housewife part I thought she was overreacting, since prenups make a lot of sense regardless of income. It’s best to get that kind of thing sorted out early while there’s still affection there instead of waiting until it falls apart and the whole thing is a knife fight. Then I got to the “quit your job” part and was like “lol nope gently caress that, dude sucks”.
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Sep 21, 2019 18:52
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Ugly In The Morning posted:Up until the housewife part I thought she was overreacting, since prenups make a lot of sense regardless of income. It’s best to get that kind of thing sorted out early while there’s still affection there instead of waiting until it falls apart and the whole thing is a knife fight. I used to be a divorce lawyer. I love prenups. I absolutely hate the idea of someone giving up a career they love because a man tells them to.
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Sep 21, 2019 18:55
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Reminds me of when I was a kid, whenever my mom wanted to get a better job or higher education, my dad would make her stop, telling her "you'll just get rich and leave me". Spoilers, get a loving prenup and shoot anyone who says that immediately
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Sep 21, 2019 18:56
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Why do men who want their wives to be SAHM also completely devalue said SAHM role? It's like "I'll earn the money for us both honey" becomes "it's my loving money you didn't work for it" without any cognitive dissonance at all.
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Sep 21, 2019 19:05
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Sloth Life posted:Why do men who want their wives to be SAHM also completely devalue said SAHM role? It's like "I'll earn the money for us both honey" becomes "it's my loving money you didn't work for it" without any cognitive dissonance at all. :thatspatriarchy:
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Sep 21, 2019 19:06
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Sloth Life posted:Why do men who want their wives to be SAHM also completely devalue said SAHM role? It's like "I'll earn the money for us both honey" becomes "it's my loving money you didn't work for it" without any cognitive dissonance at all. it's to own the person
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Sep 21, 2019 19:15
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chitoryu12 posted:I know someone who "has one", but it's not quite that simple. She was severely abused in childhood, to a degree that almost sounds like an edgy parody with how traumatizing it was, and dissociating is a common coping method for severely abused children. In this case it manifested as her dissociation being referring to herself by an old nickname and becoming much more willing to engage in risky or self-harming behavior, which she may or may not have memory of after she snaps out of it. It's not an actual "split personality", but her brain essentially cutting her off under stress because it used to be the only way to handle what she went through without snapping completely. Oh i see. So instead of multiple seperate personalities, it's more of a person's single personality split into two "modes" of their "normal mode" and their "dissociative coping method" mode? The same personality, but exhibiting very different traits as coping method? Would they switch between "modes" based on the situation they're in at a given time, or would it switch randomly? Fascinating subject, maybe we need a dedicated thread for it. I love psychology and read about it frequently (Although don't always fully understand it.) partly out of curiousity to try and understand my own personality traits. Bruceski posted:My GF is a real sweetheart, it's a shame she can only find time to go on dates outdoors on overcast nights or new moons. Went out with a girl once, she was nice. Wore sunglasses all the time.. indoors.. at night.. also had a labrador with a little yellow vest and frequently walked into stuff. Anyway she dumped me for someone better looking. Cough Drop The Beat posted:I feel so bad for this poor lady and I hope she gets far away from that abusive monster and severs. No one deserves to be treated that way and destroyed on the inside. I agree. That is some heartbreaking soul destroying poo poo right there. The person you love stright up says you're not attractive enough for them to be seen with you. gently caress. LadyPictureShow posted:I stumbled upon him the next day at the gym and I begged him to talk to me about it. He kept hitting me with, “53% of girls use to Tinder to make friends so statistically you’re wrong.” Anyway, I pester him and he ended up buying me Subway. My boss cancelled my plans so I asked him what he was doing, if he maybe wanted to get high or something. Part of the reason he agreed to buy me Subway was because I told him he could keep my weed if he did. LOL. No-one uses Tinder to make friends. Maybe friends with benefits. I'd buy a girl Subway in exchange for weed. Not a bad shout. Smirking_Serpent posted:AITA for doing a "nice guy" when a girl wouldn't date me? Hahahahahahaha. Mug. Hellblazer187 posted:NTA. The give up your career when we have kids thing is so loving toxic. Agreed. Sounds like he just wants to own her, or ensure that if she ever leaves him she'll be totally financially ruined. Give up her career, have a prenup, family's broke. If she gets married then they split she's left with nothing at all.
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Sep 21, 2019 19:17
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Danaru posted:Reminds me of when I was a kid, whenever my mom wanted to get a better job or higher education, my dad would make her stop, telling her "you'll just get rich and leave me". I'd like to believe your mom kicked him in the groin and went on to become top of her field.
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Sep 21, 2019 19:19
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Motronic posted:It's not really clear what you experienced here, but that's not how the banking system works. Just like closing a credit card (and/or getting a new one) doesn't wipe out your credit history, because Equifax/Transunion/etc has it, the same is true of banking (Chex Systems). like i said it was mostly trying to get new apartments. i'm not privy to exactly what service they used for the background check but the fact that my (at the time) only bank account was less than 6 months old was communicated to me as a problem. big apartment complexes with property management firms didn't care, but small time places like where the apartment was part of a single 4-plex owned by an individual definitely spawned additional questions where I had to explain to them that'd i'd recently been divorced and while i could provide details about my previous account I wasn't the only person named on the account.
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Sep 21, 2019 19:26
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Pinecone Sample posted:Boyfriend didnt invite me to friends wedding Girl, you are not his girlfriend. You are the other woman.
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Sep 21, 2019 19:31
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Hmm let me guess the guy who wants a prenup and also a STAH wife thinks he can avoid alimony with a prenup. Like that's literally not how it works. Prenups protect individual property and inheritances they're not a document that states "you get to stay at home with no right to joint marital property it's all mine neener neener"
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Sep 21, 2019 19:34
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AITA for bleeding into an ruining a gigantic vat of chilli?quote:I tend to get nosebleeds for a couple of months every year. I think it's due to the increasing dryness as the seasons change. I had a really bad one that kept recurring a few weeks ago, but it had since stopped and I hadn't started bleeding again in over a week.
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Sep 21, 2019 19:40
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Negotiate a generous salary for SAHM duties and insist that it gets written into the prenup. Cash in their life insurance when they die of apoplexy.
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Sep 21, 2019 19:41
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