- City of Glompton
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this morning when i woke up i had to inflate myself by blowing on my finger cartoon style before i could get out of bed
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Jan 3, 2020 01:12
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 15, 2024 04:25
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- City of Glompton
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you've heard that time and pressure make diamonds, well it's true, after 8 hours under this thing i'm a 10 on the Mohs scale
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Jan 3, 2020 01:12
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- City of Glompton
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my girlfriend has started sticking four leaf clovers on my rear end before bed
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Jan 3, 2020 01:12
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- City of Glompton
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on the plus side, no more wrinkles!
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Jan 3, 2020 01:13
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- Plant MONSTER.
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I was watching simpsons at 0.75 without knowing until a scene where homer and bart were getting back massages at a hotel and the noises they were making were super drawn out like a youtube poop
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I want to sleep with one of those awful super heavy aprons they make you wear when they x-ray you, that would tucker me out i wager. the heavier the thing, the better i sleep
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Jan 3, 2020 01:23
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- nut
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my flat stomach would look great if it wasn’t bordered by flat hips
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Jan 3, 2020 01:32
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- City of Glompton
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I went to sleep on the sixty nineth floor
I woke up in the basement
ah you requested the turn down for what service
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Jan 3, 2020 03:43
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- Macnult
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10 reps
20 minute nap
repeat 2 more times for a full set
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Jan 3, 2020 04:06
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- roomforthetuna
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I don't need to know anything about virii! My CUSTOM PROGRAM keeps me protected! It's not like they'll try to come in through the Internet or something!
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I thought my weighted blanked was too heavy, but it turned out I was just on Jupiter.
Edit: you could make your Earth-blanket 10% lighter by putting it on Uranus, lol.
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Jan 3, 2020 06:46
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- Lil Swamp Booger Baby
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I'll hold it up a bit for you as you sleep OP
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Jan 3, 2020 07:28
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- nut
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I thought my weighted blanked was too heavy, but it turned out I was just on Jupiter.
Edit: you could make your Earth-blanket 10% lighter by putting it on Uranus, lol.
lol
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Jan 3, 2020 12:37
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- Slush Garbo
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FALSE SLACK
is
BETTER
than
NO SLACK
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ah you requested the turn down for what service
lol
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Jan 3, 2020 15:42
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- google THIS
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ah you requested the turn down for what service
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Jan 3, 2020 16:05
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- Barco Fiesta
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a fantasy of olives
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his bod is sweaty, bed soft, blanket's heavy
he brushed his teeth and laid down already, time for beddy
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Jan 4, 2020 02:11
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- Chinatown
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by Fluffdaddy
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his bod is sweaty, bed soft, blanket's heavy
he brushed his teeth and laid down already, time for beddy
----------------
This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!
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Jan 4, 2020 04:07
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- Escape From Noise
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Made a blanket fort from my weighted blanket. Now I am the scourge of the sleepover.
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Jan 4, 2020 04:55
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- Lil Swamp Booger Baby
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his bod is sweaty, bed soft, blanket's heavy
he brushed his teeth and laid down already, time for beddy
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Jan 4, 2020 05:39
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- treasure bear
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ah you requested the turn down for what service
his bod is sweaty, bed soft, blanket's heavy
he brushed his teeth and laid down already, time for beddy
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Jan 4, 2020 06:10
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- nut
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i'm not even trying yet
*takes off weighted blanket and sleeps even more soundly*
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Jan 4, 2020 11:53
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- Crime on a Dime
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I now find myself unconsciously singing a lullaby to the grapes as I put them in the winepress
if you dont sing to pets or inanimate objects youre suspicious
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Jan 5, 2020 10:38
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- Chinatown
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by Fluffdaddy
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Posting from my weighted blanket at Pillowfort-Upon-Bed.
The kitchen is so far from here.
I must venture out soon.
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Jan 5, 2020 16:14
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- nut
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me: doc, i think something's wrong, I got a weighted blanket and went to sleep an outie and woke up an innie
doc: holy moly, the pressure from the blanket was enough to push in your belly button?
me: i was talking about my nips
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Jan 6, 2020 01:45
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- Areola Grande
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it's a free country u pervs
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bought a weighted afghan. big mistake
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Jan 6, 2020 01:51
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- Areola Grande
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it's a free country u pervs
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Jan 6, 2020 03:00
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- Slush Garbo
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FALSE SLACK
is
BETTER
than
NO SLACK
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lol
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Jan 6, 2020 03:01
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- google THIS
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Sorry, can't come into work today. I can't seem to reach my weighted blanket's escape velocity.
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Jan 6, 2020 03:58
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- Escape From Noise
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*Swinging my weighted blanket over my head while brandishing a standing lamp in my underwear*
Me: Call me SPARTACUS!
My girlfriend: No.
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Jan 6, 2020 04:18
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- Macnult
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[cat lays down on my weighted blanket]
this is it. this is the rest of my life now
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Jan 6, 2020 04:31
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- nut
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Jan 6, 2020 04:40
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- Finger Prince
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My weighted blanket cannot be observed by conventional means but it does emit Hawking radiation.
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Jan 6, 2020 04:41
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- Escape From Noise
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Jan 6, 2020 04:46
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 15, 2024 04:25
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