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The Perfect Element posted:drat, I completely forgot about the shadow line and how great that title sequence was. Can't remember anything at all about the show itself, but the titles give me chills. The final twist is that the massive criminal conspiracy and corruption was all laundering money through/for the police pensions Khablam posted:Yes. Everything about this episode was staggeringly awful. The lawyer and the wi-fi bullshit was bad enough, but none of the plot makes any sense. Van Helsing is carrying arounda blood sample in her picket for soem reason, is determined enough to drink Dracula's blood to find answers, but then when we see her three months later she suddenly no longer gives a poo poo. This ancient secret order founded from Mina Harker's estate is somehow also taking money from some suspicious shadowy entity, but also instantly folds from a simple legal challenge. Van Helsing talks about how she only recommended Jack for for the trial (the top-secret shady vampire-abduction trial is somehow taking inexperienced volunteers?) to get him money to put him through college - which a) isn't how it works in the UK, and b) he's a junior doctor, so he's already graduated. Dracula is a massive threat and planning world domination, but they're able to track down his secret lair offscreen and then blithely walk into his lair to confront him like it's an episode of scooby doo. The Mina plot is staggeringly offensive. She jokes that her token-gay-friend is slut-shaming her, but she marries a complete stranger, toys with Jack's feelings, is cheating on her hen-do, is constantly filmed writing around seductively, and her entire plot is about how she's chasing dick and loves how hot she is. It's like they were away they'd written an insulting character, and then threw in a line about oh hey its actually totally cool. And then it turns out Dracula is only scared of the sun and crosses because he's scared of death (what?) and he's ashamed that he's not as cool as his successful murderous family, which is not a part of the plot until literally the final 5 minutes.
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Jan 5, 2020 19:29
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At what point did he get it into his head that sunlight would burn him? If it never truly had an effect, there would never have been a point at which he slightly burned an arm or something, so he wouldn't need to avoid it? So so loving stupid
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Jan 5, 2020 20:13
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Kin posted:And as usual, if it's good in the last 10 years, you can't attribute it to the BBC. correct. also, are they going to be doing a big fat quiz of the decade?
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Jan 7, 2020 22:13
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Watermelon Daiquiri posted:correct. Yeah it’s been on. Jan 3rd iirc.
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Jan 7, 2020 22:20
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I am baffled by the positive reviews for Dracula episodes 1&2. I just watched the first one on Netflix and it was just terrible. Of course I have to watch the rest now because if people say it turns to poo poo in episode 3, oh boy.
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Jan 7, 2020 23:49
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Bape Culture posted:Yeah it’s been on. Jan 3rd iirc. Excellent. I wasnt sure if they were going to do it, and youtube hadnt shown it in my recc. yet.
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Jan 8, 2020 00:08
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It wasn't bad, I think I preferred Of The Year but I even enjoyed Alan Carr which is unusual so they must've done something right.
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Jan 8, 2020 00:31
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EL BROMANCE posted:It wasn't bad, I think I preferred Of The Year but I even enjoyed Alan Carr which is unusual so they must've done something right. Same. There were a few times where i checked how much was left. Plus I had been rewatching most of them so a good portion was rehashed from that lol. Richard Ayoade is always a treat. Also I need to find a good source of 8-cats-countdown. I've gotten hooked and while youtube has quite a bit its still kind of sparse... Watermelon Daiquiri fucked around with this message at 01:28 on Jan 8, 2020 |
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Jan 8, 2020 01:26
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For the least effort, there’s a reddit sub called UKTVLAND that should have you covered for most.
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Jan 8, 2020 01:54
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EL BROMANCE posted:For the least effort, there’s a reddit sub called UKTVLAND that should have you covered for most. brilliant, thanks a bunch
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Jan 8, 2020 02:22
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Actually their header says /ukpanelshowsonly is more likely to be useful for that stuff, but between the two you should be covered.
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Jan 8, 2020 02:41
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The Jonestown doc on BBC4 last night was excellent. Highly recommended. The second part is on tonight.
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Jan 8, 2020 10:58
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Pottery Showdown is on C4 tonight at 9 and it’s amazing and people should watch it.
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Jan 8, 2020 21:55
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I don't remember seeing any of the glazes bubbling like several of these ones did in previous seasons. I wonder what happened?
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Jan 9, 2020 02:34
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Total Meatlove posted:Pottery Showdown is on C4 tonight at 9 and it’s amazing and people should watch it. I love it. We’re really glad it’s back The crying thing became a bit of a joke among some thread readers last time but it genuinely seems like he just can’t control it, which is really endearing E: unlike the insufferable Hollywood Handshake 
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Jan 9, 2020 07:01
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Thanks for alerting me it was, no thanks for making me late to work this morning. The posh one is an ex of Prince Harry and Jenson Button. (I stumbled across a Daily Heil article, I don't have an encyclopedic knowledge of their exes...)
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Jan 9, 2020 14:26
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She is extravagantly posh isn’t she
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Jan 9, 2020 15:19
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Florence St George nee Brudenell-Bruce. Dated Harry, Jenson, now married to aristocrat Henry. I've now gone right off her. Bet she wins...
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Jan 9, 2020 18:11
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Watched the 2019 episode of Year in the Life of a Year the other day, always funny. The longer I’m out of the country and don’t see everything that goes on with the push forward in doing cleaner edits really makes it hard for me to spot the line of reality sometimes though. The Chris Eccleston thing was entirely a skit, yeah? Or was the other side of it from something real and he just did his bits?
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Jan 9, 2020 18:38
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Finally watched the last episode of Dracula and the ending (let's be honest here, it's only the ending of the first season since there will be many more to come) was probably the dumbest thing I've seen.
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Jan 11, 2020 18:00
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EL BROMANCE posted:Watched the 2019 episode of Year in the Life of a Year the other day, always funny. The longer I’m out of the country and don’t see everything that goes on with the push forward in doing cleaner edits really makes it hard for me to spot the line of reality sometimes though. Pure skit. Best thing Eccleston has done since Our Friends in the North. "when a human bleeds, it dies. When a radiator bleeds...it comes alive"
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Jan 13, 2020 12:53
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not a bot posted:Finally watched the last episode of Dracula and the ending (let's be honest here, it's only the ending of the first season since there will be many more to come) was probably the dumbest thing I've seen. Hate watched it with a mate yesterday, and I pray to God there won't be another season. Unfortunately it's 73% fresh on RT, and that's often enough for Netflix. I can't imagine how the sheer stupidity can escalate from where it got in the final reveal, but I'm sure Moffat will find a way, should someone give him another season. The only good things about this Dracula were stylistic choices Moffat nicked from better Draculas, and I wish the entire thing was just that. At least Sir Christopher Lee didn't have to see this, he'd be fuming.
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Jan 13, 2020 16:35
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Paladinus posted:Hate watched it with a mate yesterday, and I pray to God there won't be another season. Unfortunately it's 73% fresh on RT, and that's often enough for Netflix. I can't imagine how the sheer stupidity can escalate from where it got in the final reveal, but I'm sure Moffat will find a way, should someone give him another season. Isn't it a BBC show? I get that Netflix are showing it outside of the UK but I don't think they're paying for it (beyond the normal rights thing)
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Jan 13, 2020 17:39
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I believe it's a co-production because the BBC has no money.
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Jan 13, 2020 17:54
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Claes Bang was great value as the count, when the script allowed him to be. Episode 3 pretty much destroyed everything and even Claes was getting boring by the end.
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Jan 13, 2020 18:21
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All of Giri/Haji is up on iPlayer now so you should watch that instead. Absolutely stellar performance by Will Sharpe, and it’s great seeing Kelly Macdonald as a nerdy cop.
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Jan 13, 2020 18:25
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Mr. Squishy posted:I believe it's a co-production because the BBC has no money. In the Netflix version it says 'Netflix original' before every episode, so I assume they are the ones with the final say on the future of the show. Flayer posted:Claes Bang was great value as the count, when the script allowed him to be. Episode 3 pretty much destroyed everything and even Claes was getting boring by the end. He definitely looks the part, and in places gives a fantastic physical performance, but all this was very much undercut for me by the utterly irksome writing. Sherlocount Whocula more like.
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Jan 13, 2020 19:24
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Someone spoil what's so bad about the last episode of Dracula cause I doubt I'm ever watching that series
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Jan 13, 2020 19:32
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Paladinus posted:In the Netflix version it says 'Netflix original' before every episode, so I assume they are the ones with the final say on the future of the show. Nah, Netflix just do that with everything they buy the rights to for different regions. The Good Place is branded a Netflix Original in the UK amongst many others.
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Jan 13, 2020 19:41
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101 posted:Someone spoil what's so bad about the last episode of Dracula cause I doubt I'm ever watching that series The first two episodes are in victorian times, with Dracula sparring against sassy Dutch-nun Van Helsing. There's a moderately interesting thing about how he absorbs the memories of people he drains, and so is something of a connoisseur, only drinking people from people he finds interesting. Episode 2 ends with Van Helsing blowing up herself and Dracula off the coast of Whitby. In episode 3, scientists(maybe?!?) from a shadowy institute founded by Mina Harker 200 years ago find Dracula in his submerged coffin. It took them 200 years because apparently diving is really loving hard. The diver examines his underwater corpse, and because she's incompetent, sticks her bare hands in his mouth, he bites her and wakes up. The shadowy organisation confronts him on the beach, and he escapes, because everybody is incompetent. Eventually Van Helsing's descendent (played by the same actress) captures him. Then this happens, because everybody is incompetent: Caros posted:I can't even handle how loving stupid the third episode is. It is final episode of Sherlock bad. The shadowy organisation has recruited Dr Sewell for....some unspecified thing. He's madly in love with Lucy Westenra, portraying her as a sex-obsessed harlot whilst also decrying anyone who accuses her of being a sex-obsessed harlot (honestly, the novel is more progressive with it's portrayal of her than the show is). Dracula somehow contacts her off-screen, and they have weird sex/draining/hallucinations (as Dracula can give hallucinations to anyone he bites, to keep them under control). Dracula drains Lucy, and, against his advice, she is cremated. She wakes up as a vampire in her coffin and is hideously burned because the crematorium people are incompetent and can't hear screams. Meanwhile, Dr Helsing is dying of cancer. She drinks Dracula's blood to better understand him, then does literally nothing for three months whilst he's busy seducing and killing Lucy. She has visions of her ancestor Helsing, because her memories were carried in Draculas blood after he drank from her. Dr Sewell figures out where Dracula is hiding, and the two of them confront him (unarmed, and alone, because they are incompetent). The hideously scarred Lucy arrives, and in her reflection she is as beautiful as ever (whereas Dracula's reflection is a hideous monster), but Dr Sewell convinces her to take a selfie, revealing her true hideous scars. She freaks out, Dr Sewell kisses her and, at her behest, stakes her. Helsing is really dying of cancer by this point, but isn't scared of Dracula, because the cancer makes her blood toxic to him. Dr Helsing thinks she's figured out why Dracula is scared of crosses and sunlight, and tells Dr Sewell to gently caress off. After he leaves, she leaps across the room and opens the curtains. Dracula just idly stands by and lets her do it. As he is bathed in sunlight he freaks out, but doesn't burn, and isn't killed. Helsing (who is now fully possessed by her ancestor Van Helsing) explains that Dracula is only scared of sunlight and crosses because he is ashamed of his inability to die gloriously, like the rest of his family of Transylvanian warlords. He drains Helsing, dying from her poisoned blood, but giving her visions that grant her a peaceful death, because he's secretly been in love with her this whole time? I think? There's no real reason for it. Also, some of you might have noticed there's something familiar in the plot of "have an (incompetent) shady science group trying to capture and study a figure out of Victorian literature" because it's the same loving plot as Moffat's 2006 Jekyll. It was exceedingly dumb back then, but somehow this is worse
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Jan 13, 2020 19:58
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101 posted:Someone spoil what's so bad about the last episode of Dracula cause I doubt I'm ever watching that series It's revealed that Dracula never was affected by sunlight or the cross, and was afraid of them because they represent his fear of death itself. In actuality, he was a coward who could not live up to his ancestor's warrior nature. So he then decides to kill himself by drinking the blood of Van Helsing's descendant, who has cancer. Also it's suddenly contemporary set, despite the first two episodes being set in the 1800s. Also theres a weird lovely subplot about Dracula shacking up with a self centred it girl, who likes being a vampire, but she ends up getting cremated and looks ugly. And he sends her a vampire emoji which you see on screen in Sherlock-o vision. Except it's way worse than that. It's worse than loving Sherlock which I didn't even think was possible. Edit: they said it better Bogmonster fucked around with this message at 20:07 on Jan 13, 2020 |
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Jan 13, 2020 20:01
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Strom Cuzewon posted:The first two episodes are in victorian times, with Dracula sparring against sassy Dutch-nun Van Helsing. There's a moderately interesting thing about how he absorbs the memories of people he drains, and so is something of a connoisseur, only drinking people from people he finds interesting. Episode 2 ends with Van Helsing blowing up herself and Dracula off the coast of Whitby. you're loving with all of us. you have to be.
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Jan 13, 2020 20:10
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Dracula being told by a dead nun that all the cross and sunlight things are just in his head and he's just too gosh dangit scared to die and Dracula going "oh yeah?" and committing suicide is 
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Jan 13, 2020 21:25
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Watermelon Daiquiri posted:you're loving with all of us. you have to be. Also being undead is some kind of weird disease, although nearly all of them lose their minds in the process. Jonathan Harker is remarked as an exception (oh yeah, Jonathan Harker gets turned into a vampire, then Dracula kills him and wears his skin to get invited in to try and kill mina) but when Lucy keeps her marbles Dracula doesn't seem to notice. Also like 1 in 20 people who die are actually undead, and most are trapped in their coffins for eternity. We just never noticed (except for the doctor dude who, despite researching this, exhumes a corpse and is surprised when it jumps up at him) Cremation is apparantly super painful and must be avoided. You may recognise this plot from Doctor Who, where the doctor opens a portal into the cybernetic afterlife to resurrect a nameless Iraqi kid that his companions love interest accidentally shot.
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Jan 13, 2020 23:43
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not a bot posted:Dracula being told by a dead nun that all the cross and sunlight things are just in his head and he's just too gosh dangit scared to die and Dracula going "oh yeah?" and committing suicide is There is a certain fridge logic in it. He took on the knowledge and feeling of those whose blood he drank. Every one he ever tasted before was poo poo scared of death, because they died by being killed by a by a big scary murderous vampire. Instagram girl was the exception, because she was suicidally depressed. So after he repeatedly drank from her, he was easy to bullshit into committing suicide. Also, the mysterious funder of the vampire blood foundation wasn’t named because Peter Thiell has lawyers...
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Jan 13, 2020 23:46
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Red Oktober posted:All of Giri/Haji is up on iPlayer now so you should watch that instead. Absolutely stellar performance by Will Sharpe, and it’s great seeing Kelly Macdonald as a nerdy cop. Thanks for this. Just watched the first episode and it’s excellent
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Jan 14, 2020 01:02
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I'm impressed the thread has made it through all these recaps without uttering the words "BLOOFER LADY" which is said about 20 times in that last episode.
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Jan 14, 2020 09:57
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I still don't understand how being ashamed of not dying a warrior's death makes Dracula scared of the Bible or requires him to get an invitation in order to enter any building.
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Jan 14, 2020 10:11
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Paladinus posted:I still don't understand how being ashamed of not dying a warrior's death makes Dracula scared of the Bible or requires him to get an invitation in order to enter any building. Because those are the popular vampire legends and so he gets those same fears through draining people. The series is stupid as gently caress, it's almost as if the entire creative premise was to set up these insane concepts and then write themselves out of the corner just so they are able to explain it. Like nothing makes sense, and yet everything has an explanation. They even named the first episode THE RULES OF THE BEAST and then reference that in the third episode. Edit: I totally forgot about the cremation thing also being a plot point in Doctor Who and man I have no idea how Moffat keeps getting away with this stuff. Hakkesshu fucked around with this message at 10:18 on Jan 14, 2020 |
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Jan 14, 2020 10:16
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Hakkesshu posted:Because those are the popular vampire legends and so he gets those same fears through draining people. The series is stupid as gently caress, it's almost as if the entire creative premise was to set up these insane concepts and then write themselves out of the corner just so they are able to explain it. Like nothing makes sense, and yet everything has an explanation. They even named the first episode THE RULES OF THE BEAST and then reference that in the third episode. But Dracula's brides survived on peasant blood. And the one we see in episode 1 is not afraid of Harker's crucifix. Van Helsing's explanation was pretty much that Dracula simply convinced himself to be afraid of what legends say he should be afraid of... for reasons. Also, there is exactly one thing from vampire legends that does work. A stake through the heart kills the undead, and only when someone else drives the stake. And I guess in Romania (?) that's what people do with all their dead, as illustrated by the bizarre scene with Russian-speaking Orthodox priest and grieving mother in episode 2. But the most eyerolling thing for me by far was the mind palace where Van Hellsing and Dracula played chess. Wow, what clever metacommentary, Steven. 
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Jan 14, 2020 10:28
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