[COVID-19 April] I've licked things I might not ordinarily have licked

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > C-SPAM > [COVID-19 April] I've licked things I might not ordinarily have licked

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U-DO Burger: Nov 12, 2007

Homeless Friend posted:

loving lol I just talked to somebody whose going on the USS Mercy. No active testing of inflow, they're being told to bring two weeks of clothing and will be locked into the wards or w/e for that duration. They didn't mention any ppe and said they'd have to wash clothes in sinks lmfao

# ? Apr 1, 2020 23:54

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Jun 1, 2024 05:45

mod sassinator: Dec 13, 2006; I came here to Kick Ass and Chew Bubblegum,
and I'm All out of Ass

Homeless Friend posted:

loving lol I just talked to somebody whose going on the USS Mercy. No active testing of inflow, they're being told to bring two weeks of clothing and will be locked into the wards or w/e for that duration. They didn't mention any ppe and said they'd have to wash clothes in sinks lmfao

people that board the mercy will never leave it alive

# ? Apr 1, 2020 23:54

Skypie: Sep 28, 2008

had to stop for gas on the way home and the gas station manager was interrogating some dude about stealing a candy bar

who the gently caress cares about a $1 snickers bar right now

mod sassinator posted:

people that board the mercy will never leave it alive

heroes always die

# ? Apr 1, 2020 23:54

Zoodpipe: Jun 24, 2004; This is an important call. So, shut the fuck up.; Fallen Rib

a.lo posted:

or stop closing them lol

have they started using any of those makeshift hospitals in New York City yet?

# ? Apr 1, 2020 23:55

Mayor Dave: Feb 20, 2009; Bernie the Snow Clown

shovelbum posted:

Love these posts, sounds like truly mild cases are a myth or from bcg or something lmao we're hosed

isn't it just that the truly mild cases don't get admitted?

# ? Apr 1, 2020 23:55

Lawman 0: Aug 17, 2010

Homeless Friend posted:

loving lol I just talked to somebody whose going on the USS Mercy. No active testing of inflow, they're being told to bring two weeks of clothing and will be locked into the wards/rooms or w/e for that duration. Where members have their areas and they can't travel around. They didn't mention any ppe and said they'd have to wash clothes in sinks lmfao.

This is a disaster

# ? Apr 1, 2020 23:55

sullat: Jan 9, 2012

A Gnarlacious Bro posted:

Be cool if the next American nuke used kills only Americans

Most of the American nukes only killed Americans.

# ? Apr 1, 2020 23:55

FizFashizzle: Mar 30, 2005

lol why did squizzle just get perma'd

# ? Apr 1, 2020 23:56

Mayor Dave: Feb 20, 2009; Bernie the Snow Clown

Homeless Friend posted:

loving lol I just talked to somebody whose going on the USS Mercy. No active testing of inflow, they're being told to bring two weeks of clothing and will be locked into the wards/rooms or w/e for that duration. Where members have their areas and they can't travel around. They didn't mention any ppe and said they'd have to wash clothes in sinks lmfao.

lmao they should really let a media outlet know because that is genuinely funny

# ? Apr 1, 2020 23:56

a.lo: Sep 12, 2009

FizFashizzle posted:

lol why did squizzle just get perma'd

good

# ? Apr 1, 2020 23:56

Mayor Dave: Feb 20, 2009; Bernie the Snow Clown

FizFashizzle posted:

lol why did squizzle just get perma'd

check today's date

# ? Apr 1, 2020 23:56

Raiad: Feb 1, 2005; Without the law, there wouldn't be lawyers.

i mean like how many nearly-empty office and retail buildings are there in this country, knock some walls down and sanitize the gently caress out of everything, god knows that you currently have like 20% of all working adults available to do this poo poo and are only going to get more as time goes on

but no, people liked boat, boat got good ratings so we're gonna get more boat

# ? Apr 1, 2020 23:57

Mokelumne Trekka: Nov 22, 2015; Soon.

mod sassinator posted:

no they're having a problem with reporting: https://komonews.com/news/coronavirus/virus-deaths-hit-223-in-wash-as-glitches-plague-statewide-reporting-system

basically a contractor built their system years ago for 5 million bucks and it can't cope with a few thousand cases in it all at once

is that contractor named Acronym by any chance lol

# ? Apr 1, 2020 23:57

A Gnarlacious Bro: Apr 25, 2007; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

FizFashizzle posted:

lol why did squizzle just get perma'd

Looks like some sort of April fools prank, you might want to be on the look out for those today unless you enjoy being fooled

# ? Apr 1, 2020 23:58

FAUXTON: Jun 2, 2005; spero che tu stia bene

Mokelumne Trekka posted:

is that contractor named Acronym by any chance lol

no it was radium

# ? Apr 1, 2020 23:58

SpiderHyphenMan: Apr 1, 2010; by Fluffdaddy

https://twitter.com/DavidLauter/status/1245485572958883841
https://twitter.com/JohnJHarwood/status/1245485542638268417

# ? Apr 1, 2020 23:58

A Gnarlacious Bro: Apr 25, 2007; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

It would be a funny prank on the mods if they weren�t reinstated imo

# ? Apr 1, 2020 23:59

MadJackal: Apr 30, 2004

FizFashizzle posted:

Why weren't they on a vent?

And is this more the cardiac aspects killing people?

Guy was rule out COVID, also had COPD and I think metastatic cancer or something. He never stood a chance. The PEA might have been from the amiodarone he got, who knows.

# ? Apr 1, 2020 23:59

Ill Peripheral: Jun 29, 2008

shovelbum posted:

Love these posts, sounds like truly mild cases are a myth or from bcg or something lmao we're hosed

The overwhelming majority are truly mild

# ? Apr 1, 2020 23:59

Solarin: Nov 15, 2007

Raiad posted:

i mean like how many nearly-empty office and retail buildings are there in this country, knock some walls down and sanitize the gently caress out of everything, god knows that you currently have like 20% of all working adults available to do this poo poo and are only going to get more as time goes on

but no, people liked boat, boat got good ratings so we're gonna get more boat

also boats don't touch land and you can't attribute deaths on them to the US. tumo wins again

# ? Apr 1, 2020 23:59

gregday: May 23, 2003

https://twitter.com/jeffmason1/status/1245485390670245889

# ? Apr 1, 2020 23:59

shovelbum: Oct 21, 2010; Fun Shoe

Homeless Friend posted:

loving lol I just talked to somebody whose going on the USS Mercy. No active testing of inflow, they're being told to bring two weeks of clothing and will be locked into the wards/rooms or w/e for that duration. Where members have their areas and they can't travel around. They didn't mention any ppe and said they'd have to wash clothes in sinks lmfao.

This is incredibly dumber than stripping the boat down and installing the equipment in a larger and less open facility

# ? Apr 2, 2020 00:00

Apraxin: Feb 22, 2006; General-Admiral

just short of breaking 1k in deaths today, very good, all is well

# ? Apr 2, 2020 00:00

Impkins Patootie: Apr 20, 2017

mod sassinator posted:

mercy

# ? Apr 2, 2020 00:00

upgunned shitpost: Jan 21, 2015

making the mercy a plague ship before any patients get on board is such a power move

# ? Apr 2, 2020 00:01

Raiad: Feb 1, 2005; Without the law, there wouldn't be lawyers.

only 1/3 of a 9/11 per day, hardly worth mentioning

# ? Apr 2, 2020 00:01

Lpzie: Nov 20, 2006

Mayor Dave posted:

check today's date

said the same thing to the landlord about the Monopoly money in an envelope.

# ? Apr 2, 2020 00:02

Mokelumne Trekka: Nov 22, 2015; Soon.

gregday posted:

https://twitter.com/jeffmason1/status/1245485390670245889

they all look like rear end

# ? Apr 2, 2020 00:02

Homeless Friend: Jul 16, 2007

shovelbum posted:

This is incredibly dumber than stripping the boat down and installing the equipment in a larger and less open facility

Ya I told them it's lol disease boat again

# ? Apr 2, 2020 00:03

Solarin: Nov 15, 2007

Raiad posted:

only 1/3 of a 9/11 per day, hardly worth mentioning

if anything this shows what a good job trump has done

# ? Apr 2, 2020 00:03

triple sulk: Sep 17, 2014

hmm

# ? Apr 2, 2020 00:03

mod sassinator: Dec 13, 2006; I came here to Kick Ass and Chew Bubblegum,
and I'm All out of Ass

Raiad posted:

only 1/3 of a 9/11 per day, hardly worth mentioning

all of them olds too, gently caress 'em. 9/11 lost 3000 first responders and wallstreet peoples, those are worth at least 3x boomers wheezing their last breath. so get back to me when we're up to 9k dead a day

(so in like 1 week)

# ? Apr 2, 2020 00:04

Homeless Friend: Jul 16, 2007

They're doing the meals being brought to them thing except big hospital rooms I guess Lmfao

# ? Apr 2, 2020 00:04

Mayor Dave: Feb 20, 2009; Bernie the Snow Clown

trump just said a scarf was better than an n95

# ? Apr 2, 2020 00:05

SKULL.GIF: Jan 20, 2017

Homeless Friend posted:

loving lol I just talked to somebody whose going on the USS Mercy. No active testing of inflow, they're being told to bring two weeks of clothing and will be locked into the wards/rooms or w/e for that duration. Where members have their areas and they can't travel around. They didn't mention any ppe and said they'd have to wash clothes in sinks lmfao.

NO MERCY!!

# ? Apr 2, 2020 00:05

Raiad: Feb 1, 2005; Without the law, there wouldn't be lawyers.

mod sassinator posted:

all of them olds too, gently caress 'em. 9/11 lost 3000 first responders and wallstreet peoples, those are worth at least 3x boomers wheezing their last breath. so get back to me when we're up to 9k dead a day

(so in like 1 week)

closer to two weeks, assuming we double the number about twice a week

# ? Apr 2, 2020 00:05

Slow Graffiti: Feb 1, 2003; Born of Frustration

MadJackal posted:

Day 9

�You want to push another epi?� �Sure, why not.�

Overhead on the hospital PA: �As you know, today is National Doctor�s Day. Let�s conclude this quiet moment by standing where you are and applauding our heroic physicians.�

As that played, half a dozen nurses and I were frantically getting into our PPEs outside a suspected COVID room to rush into a Code Blue.

Surprisingly, no one stopped to applaud.

Inside, the calming voice was drowned out by the hiss of a nonrebreather, the labored expiratory moans of the patient, and the warning dings of the bedside monitor. The bedside monitor was not happy that the patient�s heart rate was somewhere in the high 160s and was letting the room know its opinion on the matter.

Narrow complex ventricular tachycardia. But the patient isn�t hypotensive or otherwise unstable. You don�t lay on the paddles of a defibrillator for that.

�You�re going to feel a little funny for a second,� is what the nurse says to reassure the patient. What she really meant was, �We�re going to stop your heart for a second or two to reset your circuit breaker, so if it feels like you�re dying briefly, it�s because you are.� The nurse draws up some adenosine, the other MD in the room slams the bolus into the patient�s veins, and everybody gets to watch the monitor flatline for a held breath before a heart rate returns. Takes two boluses for it to take.

Problem solved.

For 73 minutes.

Nothing was playing overhead for the second Code Blue. Thankfully, an intensivist was already inside running the show. I guess the Residents haven�t been left out to fend for ourselves yet. This time around the bedside monitor was simply furious that the patient stopped breathing.

Pulseless electrical activity, PEA. The heart�s wires are firing but the pump isn�t working. You don�t lay on the paddles of a defibrillator for that either.

Hollywood has lied to you your whole life.

�Do you think we�re going to be able to resuscitate him?� �He�s full Code.� �But do you think we�re going to be able to resuscitate him?� �No, but�� Right, so it doesn�t matter. We�re running the Code.�

I get my exercise for the day by pressing on the patient�s chest for a couple minutes.

�I don�t really want to intubate him.� The patient gets intubated anyway.

A few people cycle through pushing on the patient�s chest. We haven�t felt a pulse since the Code began.

�How long has it been?� I suspect there�s a countdown timer in the intensivist�s brain that�s ticking towards an alarm labeled Ok, We Tried.

More compressions. Pretty sure I feel a rib break under my palms. That sensation never ceases to make me wince.

Another epi. Still no pulse.

The Doppler to check for a pulse is silent.

The timer goes off.

�That�s it.�

Time of death called.

�

Feels like COVID is eroding the edges off everyone�s souls in the hospital.

The initial novelty of sharp fear and apprehension standing outside COVID rooms before entering is giving way to a constant background dull dread as we gown up for the tenth or twentieth time that day.

I see my incredibly sharp attending boss distracted, needing to be reminded two or three times whose room he�s about to enter.

The lack of success in curing our patients is also taking its toll. �Successes� have mostly been defined as sending a patient home with personal oxygen tanks and explicit instructions on when to return if they get worse. We�ve had some milder cases that got sent home without oxygen, but they seem fewer than the number we send to get tubed.

I feel very bitter about this. It makes the sign out front, a sign that expresses nothing but pure gratitude and love, seem somehow mocking.

gently caress!!! Stay safe!

# ? Apr 2, 2020 00:05

DesertIslandHermit: Oct 7, 2019; It's beautiful. And it's for the god of...of...arts and crafts. I think that's what he said.

Homeless Friend posted:

loving lol I just talked to somebody whose going on the USS Mercy. No active testing of inflow, they're being told to bring two weeks of clothing and will be locked into the wards/rooms or w/e for that duration. Where members have their areas and they can't travel around. They didn't mention any ppe and said they'd have to wash clothes in sinks lmfao.

USS No Mercy

...I'm sorry.