[COVID-19 April] I've licked things I might not ordinarily have licked

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > C-SPAM > [COVID-19 April] I've licked things I might not ordinarily have licked

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Schnorkles: Apr 30, 2015; It's a little bit juvenile, but it's simple and it's timeless.

We let it be known that Schnorkles, for a snack, eats tiny pieces of shit.

You're picturing it and you're talking about it. That's a win in my book.

posting futures are going up. Up. UP!

# ? Apr 3, 2020 19:58

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# ? Jun 5, 2024 07:53

limp dick calvin: Sep 1, 2006; Strepitoso. Vedete? Una meraviglia.

Ramadu posted:

So what was the statement on space Godzilla anyway

he did nothing wrong

# ? Apr 3, 2020 19:58

Schnorkles: Apr 30, 2015; It's a little bit juvenile, but it's simple and it's timeless.

We let it be known that Schnorkles, for a snack, eats tiny pieces of shit.

You're picturing it and you're talking about it. That's a win in my book.

lmao sniped b!tch

# ? Apr 3, 2020 19:58

TODD BONZALEZ: Jul 3, 2010

Gum posted:

I bet there were some loving great sea people memes

I'm pretty sure there were! However like any self respecting archaeologist I drank way too much after toiling in the fields and writing papers summed up by 'this object has ritual significance because noone knows what the gently caress it was for' and forgot them

# ? Apr 3, 2020 19:59

Rynn: Jul 23, 2003

Impkins Patootie posted:

you should always wear a life jacket when canoeing

For real. poo poo I wear a life jacket when I clean the pool in the morning, my worst fear is falling on the solar cover or tripping in and drowning.

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:00

TODD BONZALEZ: Jul 3, 2010

Harton posted:

amazing, cats are the best.

A+ catte there friendo

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:00

anime was right: Jun 27, 2008; death is certain
keep yr cool

NofrikinfuN posted:

not understanding the sudden wave of layoffs in things like online publications

they can't possibly have enough overhead to justify this, just post lower numbers for a couple months

they can hire someone for 20k cheaper in 4 months

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:00

SchrodingersCat: Aug 23, 2011

Son of Man posted:

Even if you join police forces for the right reasons, the culture will either corrupt you or destroy you. There are people like your friend who pursue that career because they want to help. But the prison industrial complex is designed from the top down to make money and subjugate the populace. The system thus maintains a culture of cruelty and paranoia.

Someone mentioned earlier that they were going through the cheaha wilderness recently. I have a friend who is quarantined there. I'm worried about him because he be has a lung condition.

He was a cop for 20 years. Chief of police in a small town, detective in a city, etc. He was forced out of four departments, each time because he stood up to corruption (political harassment, planting drugs, beating up disabled people - despicable poo poo). He has a lung condition because he pulled a drowning boy out of the water and gave him CPR. The boy coughed up putrid water into my friend's lung.

The cops who pull drowning children out of water and give them mouth to mouth get fired for insubordination. The cops who beat up retarded kids circle up and get promoted.

Any time you bring together a group of people and give them power, weapons, and opportunity, they will become corrupted, especially in capitalist societies where everything is based around money and The Self.
The ones who resist will be ostracized and isolated. It's human nature. The people with bad natures (racists and bullies) will fall into the corruption easier and that's why the US police force as a whole is the way it is.

There are good cops, but the entire system is geared to break them down or wash them out.

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:01

NofrikinfuN: Apr 23, 2009

anime was right posted:

they can hire someone for 20k cheaper in 4 months

fair

they can hire the same people cheaper in 4 months

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:01

shovelbum: Oct 21, 2010; Fun Shoe

Harry Potter on Ice posted:

Lol. What happens to the air you exhale then? Walk the idea through a little

The medical models don't have an exhale valve, you just gotta jam the air out through the filter

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:01

Mistle: Oct 11, 2005; Eckot's comic relief cousin from out of town; Grimey Drawer

SKULL.GIF posted:

60k new cases today worldwide already and we're halfway through the day

To contextualize that, China (Remember them? Locked down half the country? Wuhan on quarantined lockdown for months?) has 81k cases total.

That were reported and counted. even conceding a lack of malfeasance, there's a lot of bodies in one place to count accurately, and it works wonders as a sleight of hand for a random severe-among-milds clusters near and elsewhere slipping under the radar

TODD BONZALEZ posted:

Meeting (online) with my cryptid club. one guy thinks he's spotted bigfoot, we all nod approvingly, ask him to keep us posted. another reported a Joe Biden sighting, we all laughed at him because Joe Biden doesn't loving exist idiot

Or maybe it was an actor in a Biden costume, with a well-rehearsed gait and trained child-sniffing embrace

NofrikinfuN posted:

not understanding the sudden wave of layoffs in things like online publications

they can't possibly have enough overhead to justify this, just post lower numbers for a couple months

Exaggerated contracting to preserve The NUMBER

Well, what's left of it, anyway

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:01

Sharkie: Feb 4, 2013; by Fluffdaddy

Gum posted:

I bet there were some loving great sea people memes

If you go up to someone from the bronze age and tell them "I've got ten clay pots but no olives" they will either lol or melt the gently caress down

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:02

Plinkey: Aug 4, 2004; by Fluffdaddy

NofrikinfuN posted:

not understanding the sudden wave of layoffs in things like online publications

they can't possibly have enough overhead to justify this, just post lower numbers for a couple months

good time to lay people off because everyone else is doing it

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:02

brugroffil: Nov 30, 2015

NofrikinfuN posted:

not understanding the sudden wave of layoffs in things like online publications

they can't possibly have enough overhead to justify this, just post lower numbers for a couple months

Advertising going to $0 kinda hurts the bottom line

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:02

OhFunny: Jun 26, 2013; EXTREMELY PISSED AT THE DNC

https://twitter.com/cnnbrk/status/1...ingawful.com%2F

Hmm scanners say no loss detected.

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:04

TODD BONZALEZ: Jul 3, 2010

Harry Potter on Ice posted:

Lol. What happens to the air you exhale then? Walk the idea through a little

Medical stuff won't have an exhale valve, stuff designed for DIY or cyclist pollution masks might have the same rating to filter incoming crap but have the exhalation valve to make them more comfortable to use, under the assumption that the wearer isn't spewing out virus particles

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:04

mark immune: Dec 14, 2019; put the teacher in the cope cage imo

HAMAS HATE BOAT posted:

He does too.

Wow dude, making light of an old man's dementia? And at a time where he's quarantined and obviously in hairsmell withdrawal? This is sick.

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:05

Eat This Glob: Jan 14, 2008; God is dead. God remains dead. And we have killed him. Who will wipe this blood off us? What festivals of atonement, what sacred games shall we need to invent?

brugroffil posted:

journalism as as whole was already dying, any economic downturn is going to kill the rest of it off outside of a few big corporate outlets

lol yeah i should probably learn some skill for the post corona world. computer touching still an option goons or has that ship sailed on the "learn to code" poo poo?

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:06

Schnorkles: Apr 30, 2015; It's a little bit juvenile, but it's simple and it's timeless.

We let it be known that Schnorkles, for a snack, eats tiny pieces of shit.

You're picturing it and you're talking about it. That's a win in my book.

NofrikinfuN posted:

not understanding the sudden wave of layoffs in things like online publications

they can't possibly have enough overhead to justify this, just post lower numbers for a couple months

all consumer advertising is basically dead right now

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:07

stephenthinkpad: Jan 2, 2020

twoday posted:

Chart showing deaths per week in the Netherlands and comparing the corona crisis to the 🤒 Ｆｌｕｗａｖｅ 🌊 of 2018

Does the chart go up to space?

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:07

mod sassinator: Dec 13, 2006; I came here to Kick Ass and Chew Bubblegum,
and I'm All out of Ass

TODD BONZALEZ posted:

Medical stuff won't have an exhale valve, stuff designed for DIY or cyclist pollution masks might have the same rating to filter incoming crap but have the exhalation valve to make them more comfortable to use, under the assumption that the wearer isn't spewing out virus particles

what if you put a sick vape rig on the exhaust so at least everyone can see your exhale and avoid it?

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:08

mark immune: Dec 14, 2019; put the teacher in the cope cage imo

Plinkey posted:

https://twitter.com/washingtonpost/status/1246124270989828098

Always surprised by the increase in how physically lovely this guy looks

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:08

Rexicon1: Oct 9, 2007; A Shameful Path Led You Here

stephenthinkpad posted:

Does the chart go up to space?

that inflection point should be coming any day now

any day now

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:08

Throatwarbler: Nov 17, 2008; by vyelkin

Mistle posted:

That were reported and counted. even conceding a lack of malfeasance, there's a lot of bodies in one place to count accurately, and it works wonders as a sleight of hand for a random severe-among-milds clusters near and elsewhere slipping under the radar

LOL white people desperately trying to convince themselves that THOSE NONWHITES MUST BE WORSE SOMEHOW.

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:09

Nothus: Feb 22, 2001; Buglord

lol we just got a letter from the landlord that's four paragraphs of covid resources and ends with "rent is still due on the first, no exceptions"

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:09

Son of Man: Jan 29, 2003; by Azathoth

SchrodingersCat posted:

Any time you bring together a group of people and give them power, weapons, and opportunity, they will become corrupted, especially in capitalist societies where everything is based around money and The Self.
The ones who resist will be ostracized and isolated. It's human nature. The people with bad natures (racists and bullies) will fall into the corruption easier and that's why the US police force as a whole is the way it is.

There are good cops, but the entire system is geared to break them down or wash them out.

I agree, except that I do not believe that this is human nature. I believe that it is a system expressly designed this way by evil and powerful people

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:10

20 Blunts: Jan 21, 2017

holy gently caress JOE BIDEN UNDERSTANDS THE DEVIL

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:10

Schnorkles: Apr 30, 2015; It's a little bit juvenile, but it's simple and it's timeless.

We let it be known that Schnorkles, for a snack, eats tiny pieces of shit.

You're picturing it and you're talking about it. That's a win in my book.

evictions theoretically start next week, poo poo really gonna hit the fan then

April gonna be week after week of "it keeps getting worse huh"

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:12

Mayor Dave: Feb 20, 2009; Bernie the Snow Clown

OhFunny posted:

https://twitter.com/cnnbrk/status/1...ingawful.com%2F

Hmm scanners say no loss detected.

Two anchors at CNN getting it strongly implies that it was brought in by someone who wasn't allowed to self quarantine, probably a makeup person

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:12

euphronius: Feb 18, 2009

in PA you need to have the courts open to evict people and I jsut saw the local magistrate walk his dog past my house so

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:13

Rah!: Feb 21, 2006

OhFunny posted:

https://twitter.com/cnnbrk/status/1...ingawful.com%2F

Hmm scanners say no loss detected.

more rich fucks getting insta tested and insta results

meanwhile i have to wait over a week, and im lucky compared to most americans, considering i could get tested at all lol

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:13

JAY ZERO SUM GAME: Oct 18, 2005; Walter.
I know you know how to do this.
Get up.

man we are hosed!!

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:13

stuffed crust punk: Oct 8, 2004; by LITERALLY AN ADMIN

Taintrunner posted:

https://twitter.com/thesnydes/status/1246117388170518530?s=21

capital is murdering everyone lmao

gone

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:13

Anime Schoolgirl: Nov 28, 2002

Dreylad posted:

congratulations on getting plague-fueled public healthcare america

it only took converting to the People's Republic of America to do it, but by golly

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:13

Mr. Lobe: Feb 23, 2007; ... Dry bones...

stephenthinkpad posted:

Does the chart go up to space?

presumably they will shift to log scaling

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:13

Mayor Dave: Feb 20, 2009; Bernie the Snow Clown

Schnorkles posted:

evictions theoretically start next week, poo poo really gonna hit the fan then

April gonna be week after week of "it keeps getting worse huh"

Next week won't be so bad, it's the July one when everyone who got a moratorium on rent can't pay 3 months at once when things will really pop off

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:13

Rynn: Jul 23, 2003

Harton posted:

amazing, cats are the best.

My chonker just tells me to keep it down while working so he can finish his 3 hour nap in the sun

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:14

Son of Man: Jan 29, 2003; by Azathoth

Throatwarbler posted:

LOL white people desperately trying to convince themselves that THOSE NONWHITES MUST BE WORSE SOMEHOW.

Clearly the countries controlled by whites have had the worst response to the virus. This does not make the Chinese government a paragon of transparency. I'm sure they're employing at least the same obfuscation tactics as American governments; they're not stupid.

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:14

Chris James 2: Aug 9, 2012

NofrikinfuN posted:

not understanding the sudden wave of layoffs in things like online publications

they can't possibly have enough overhead to justify this, just post lower numbers for a couple months

What can you advertise at this point

What's open, what's sold, what sports are happening, what films are playing, what band is performing

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:15

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# ? Jun 5, 2024 07:53

Son of Man: Jan 29, 2003; by Azathoth

euphronius posted:

in PA you need to have the courts open to evict people and I jsut saw the local magistrate walk his dog past my house so

Do people not know this? Lol I'm in the chuddiest of states and court is closed until May at the earliest. Tell the land lord to sit & spin

# ? Apr 3, 2020 20:16

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > C-SPAM > [COVID-19 April] I've licked things I might not ordinarily have licked

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