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Everyone's heard jokes about lost LTs and a SSG that was brand new to my platoon loved to make them. We were doing squad lanes and the whole platoon was heading to the field in our Strykers. Since he was the first one to be evaluated I had him lead us out and once we got into the training area it became apparent that we were going in the complete opposite direction we were supposed to go. Despite his jokes I decided I would allow him to save some face so over the net I told him to make a map check. He comes back that everything is good and we're heading the right way. Ultimately had to explain to him over the net in front of the whole platoon that we're going the wrong way and he needs to turn us around. We eventually get to our dismount point and I stand there facing the direction we need to take and this dumb son of bitch has his squad walking past me in the opposite direction AGAIN! "SSG Dumbass, where are you going?" "uh, to the OP...?" "You know it's in the opposite direction right?" "Are you sure?" "Positive" Him and his team leader check their map and sure enough they were headed in the wrong direction. A scout that can't use a map is useless, he's one of two NCOs I ever made sure to enumerate that they were the worst of their peers on their NCO evaluation. I always enjoyed the irony of the lost LT stereotype being both true and the fact that few people get as much land nav training as officers, especially maneuver branch officers. They're definitely "lost" but they could probably find their way with a map, protractor and a compass.
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Sep 5, 2020 02:47
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Pretty sure this is a fresh one for y’all. So basically we were doing an amnesty hour in Airman Leadership School but it wasn’t even for ALS infractions it was for stuff in our careers which right off the bat set off alarms in my head. A few flight line people go and it’s all smooth until another medical guy went and I forgot what his story was exactly but our instructor who was medical (and who had been railed out by my supervisor even though both were married but she pretty much auto passed me which was cool) told him that his story wasn’t acceptable and straight up stopped the session to call the hospital to narc on him. She then proceeds to actually try and get “amnesty” hour back on track but yeah everyone clammed the gently caress up after that.
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Sep 5, 2020 06:41
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What'd he do? Was it pilfering opioids?
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Sep 5, 2020 07:30
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https://twitter.com/MsLisaHendricks/status/1302064472081670146?s=20 Looks like the epitome of a self-correcting problem right there
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Sep 5, 2020 16:31
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It would be slightly more effective on the left side, but that’ll do, pig. That’ll do.
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Sep 5, 2020 16:36
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Personally i thought the dick gun thing giving people an inadvertent vasectomy was the epitome of a self correcting problem but I was wrong
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Sep 5, 2020 16:46
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That would be a very effective ND. Like, that would hit a lot of important things.
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Sep 5, 2020 16:47
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I like how they’re so in your face and against common decency but they can’t put gently caress on a shirt without trying to obscure it because that’s just a bridge too far
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Sep 5, 2020 16:48
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pantslesswithwolves posted:https://twitter.com/MsLisaHendricks/status/1302064472081670146?s=20
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Sep 5, 2020 16:52
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evil_bunnY posted:How the gently caress do you even draw from that? Walk up, headlock the idiot, draw, tap tap.
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Sep 5, 2020 16:53
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evil_bunnY posted:How the gently caress do you even draw from that? Have orangutang arms.
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Sep 5, 2020 16:54
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Are we 100% sure that isn't Sacha Baron Cohen?
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Sep 5, 2020 17:02
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mlmp08 posted:Walk up, headlock the idiot, draw, tap tap. lol 
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Sep 5, 2020 17:04
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thr first few times i saw that picture, i assumed it was arranged like a side-holster tilted forward a bit, so the barrel was pointing back past your ear, but i guess that would be too easy to fall out.
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Sep 5, 2020 17:06
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Doc Hawkins posted:thr first few times i saw that picture, i assumed it was arranged like a side-holster tilted forward a bit, so the barrel was pointing back past your ear, but i guess that would be too easy to fall out. gunter_skul_gun.jpg
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Sep 5, 2020 20:49
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Cenen posted:Pretty sure this is a fresh one for y’all. So basically we were doing an amnesty hour in Airman Leadership School but it wasn’t even for ALS infractions it was for stuff in our careers which right off the bat set off alarms in my head. A few flight line people go and it’s all smooth until another medical guy went and I forgot what his story was exactly but our instructor who was medical (and who had been railed out by my supervisor even though both were married but she pretty much auto passed me which was cool) told him that his story wasn’t acceptable and straight up stopped the session to call the hospital to narc on him. She then proceeds to actually try and get “amnesty” hour back on track but yeah everyone clammed the gently caress up after that. This seems to have kinda fallen off the radar since the dipshit holster mask overtook the conversation, but what the gently caress did he do? I refuse to believe a medical-adjacent(?) person would narc on stolen drugs or some other banal poo poo. I have to believe he was abusing patients or something that was actively harming other people. Then again, lol fuckin military fuckin idiots thread lol
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Sep 5, 2020 22:07
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TK-42-1 posted:I like how they’re so in your face and against common decency but they can’t put gently caress on a shirt without trying to obscure it because that’s just a bridge too far swears make baby jesus cry
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Sep 6, 2020 04:28
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Guys, it’s me: I’m the idiot I live with my gf of two years, and she is kind of a slob. I can’t get her to clean up the kitchen at all with the gentlest suggestion, she’s had a pile of clothes in the same corner since last November (because she doesn’t have, and has no intention of purchasing a dresser), and it’s almost impossible to get her to do any chores during the day. I should note that she works from home, and almost never leaves the apartment unless it’s with me. In a way, she kinda reminds me of myself at 19, except she’s 31 and won’t take responsibility for anything. Whenever I try to suggest some changes, it’s melt with either empty promises or a total meltdown. I feel like a total moron trying to train this grown woman how to live with another person. GIP, what the gently caress do I do?
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Sep 6, 2020 05:41
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marry her
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Sep 6, 2020 05:49
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Kick her out, marry a stripper instead  (in all seriousness - head on over to E/N and the breakup thread)
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Sep 6, 2020 05:57
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Living by myself during the pandemic is some almost nirvanaesque peace and tranquility. The state of the world does leaving me both starting and ending my day with a sigh of exasperation though.
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Sep 6, 2020 06:03
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Time Crisis Actor posted:Guys, it’s me: I’m the idiot Convince her to enlist.
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Sep 6, 2020 08:13
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Wibla posted:Kick her out, marry a stripper instead boo and not even boo-urns. Comrade Blyatlov posted:marry her
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Sep 6, 2020 08:18
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Real chat - you need to have some conversations about love languages and the way you communicate. You're not communicating with her in the right fashion on this. Be prepared, though, that if this is a make or break type thing, you have to be ready for the break. Are you wanting to take a further step in the relationship? You could very easily bring this up as a part of the transition to a more serious phase if that's where you want to go.
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Sep 6, 2020 13:37
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Don't date children, even if they are 31.
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Sep 6, 2020 13:57
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Time Crisis Actor posted:Guys, it’s me: I’m the idiot real talk: would you marry this person as they are and trust them to raise a kid
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Sep 6, 2020 14:16
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We only put away laundry we don't want to be wrinkly. Like business wear. Who has time to waste on constantly folding and putting away laundry in this hell verse
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Sep 6, 2020 14:37
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PookBear posted:real talk: would you marry this person as they are and trust them to raise a kid No. Not without significant improvement
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Sep 6, 2020 14:46
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Time Crisis Actor posted:No. Not without significant improvement Change is a self-motivated thing. You can't save someone from themselves - they are the ones who have to save themselves...from themselves. If not living in garbage is a big deal to you (and it loving well should be) end it.
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Sep 6, 2020 15:00
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I dated someone like that once upon a time and managed to convince them to work on it by sitting them down and asking them directly "why are you like this?". Not in an accusatory way, just genuinely trying to unearth the reason why they chose to live like that. It triggered a dawning of self-realization and they stopped doing that poo poo. Of course, this doesn't work for everyone, but it can't hurt to at least give that a shot if you only want to break up with them out of necessity.
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Sep 6, 2020 17:57
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Some boot at Lejune paid five hundred loving dollars for this:
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Sep 6, 2020 18:11
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I can't wait to see when it's finished. 
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Sep 6, 2020 18:22
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I'm the owlshole mouth
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Sep 6, 2020 21:05
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facialimpediment posted:One Cali wildfire was confirmed to be caused by a gender reveal party: This post reminded me of a guy. We were in a contact drill and a smoke genny caused a grass fire. He heard the call FIRE FIRE FIRE and interpreted it to mean "keep firing my rifle", which he did until the enemy party jumped out of their positions and ran past him to help the rest of us put the fire out. Jaguars! fucked around with this message at 12:10 on Sep 7, 2020 |
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Sep 7, 2020 11:53
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Hahaha
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Sep 7, 2020 13:01
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Time Crisis Actor posted:Guys, it’s me: I’m the idiot Hope you put less time trying to solve this problem than I did.
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Sep 7, 2020 14:13
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Time Crisis Actor posted:Guys, it’s me: I’m the idiot I'm one of these people, we don't change. Focus your energies on one-upping BeatMasterJ's Doom bathroom, maybe go for the Xen aesthetic.
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Sep 7, 2020 14:31
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Jaguars! posted:This post reminded me of a guy. We were in a contact drill and a smoke genny caused a grass fire. He heard the call FIRE FIRE FIRE and interpreted it to mean "keep firing my rifle", which he did until the enemy party jumped out of their positions and ran past him to help the rest of us put the fire out. I thought that was just a joke in Futurama. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MsY0PVqTleY&t=17s
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Sep 7, 2020 15:39
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SquirrelyPSU posted:Hope you put less time trying to solve this problem than I did. this hit me hard
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Sep 7, 2020 17:12
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| # ? Jun 7, 2024 02:34 |
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shame on an IGA posted:I’m one of these people, we don't change. Focus your energies on one-upping BeatMasterJ's Doom bathroom, maybe go for the Xen aesthetic.
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Sep 7, 2020 21:45
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