Auspol Spring - GLASSES RAISED: Beers - The Something Awful Forums

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Debate & Discussion > Auspol Spring - GLASSES RAISED: Beers

Gridlocked: Aug 2, 2014; MR. STUPID MORON
WITH AN UGLY FACE
AND A BIG BUTT
AND HIS BUTT SMELLS
AND HE LIKES TO KISS
HIS OWN BUTT
by Roger Hargreaves

Animal Friend posted:

Aussie Jager would be built in France, be diesel powered and half the size of the others. Would be painted like a golliwog.

But piloted by Paul Hogan and ergo undefeatable.

Also everyone join the discord.

# ? Nov 2, 2020 10:58

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# ? May 24, 2024 00:59

GoldStandardConure: Jun 11, 2010; I have to kill fast
and mayflies too slow; Pillbug

Gridlocked posted:

Also everyone join the discord.

# ? Nov 2, 2020 11:01

Pile Of Garbage: May 28, 2007

In it but CBF posting. Much prefer forums drive-by

# ? Nov 2, 2020 11:07

hambeet: Sep 13, 2002

Solemn Sloth posted:

Jaeger Ed �friend of the family� Brown

# ? Nov 2, 2020 13:02

hambeet: Sep 13, 2002

Gridlocked posted:

Also everyone join the discord.

nah we've got all the good 'uns

# ? Nov 2, 2020 13:02

The Peccadillo: Mar 4, 2013; We Have Important Work To Do

The Peccadillo posted:

The accents of those two Pacific Rim guys though, goddamn

Topical contender for the crown:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CHZ8wx6J36Q

# ? Nov 2, 2020 13:30

Laserface: Dec 24, 2004

Someone make a discord bot that posts all political news links in the discord to the thread

# ? Nov 3, 2020 00:49

TheLastRoboKy: May 2, 2009; Finishing the game with everyone else's continues

Sorry I don't work on holy days.

# ? Nov 3, 2020 00:53

Animal Friend: Sep 7, 2011

My conspiracy nut friend made a pilgrimage to Daniel Andrew's offices yesterday. Its apparently near a Freemason's hall and right next to a pizza store.

He sent me a photo and said "pizzagate is real btw".

# ? Nov 3, 2020 03:24

kirbysuperstar: Nov 11, 2012; Let the fools who stand before us be destroyed by the power you and I possess.

Animal Friend posted:

My conspiracy nut friend made a pilgrimage to Daniel Andrew's offices yesterday. Its apparently near a Freemason's hall and right next to a pizza store.

He sent me a photo and said "pizzagate is real btw".

Is there a reason you call them a friend

# ? Nov 3, 2020 03:31

LIVE AMMO COSPLAY: Feb 3, 2006

Animal Friend posted:

My conspiracy nut friend made a pilgrimage to Daniel Andrew's offices yesterday. Its apparently near a Freemason's hall and right next to a pizza store.

He sent me a photo and said "pizzagate is real btw".

You should keep notes so you have lots to tell the media when they interview you afterwards.

# ? Nov 3, 2020 03:41

The Peccadillo: Mar 4, 2013; We Have Important Work To Do

We're gonna invade, for democracy

https://twitter.com/Politics_SMHAGE/status/1323443766900912129

# ? Nov 3, 2020 04:05

Kazzah: Jul 15, 2011; Formerly known as
Krazyface; Hair Elf

GREEN N GOLD DAWN

# ? Nov 3, 2020 04:08

A Sometimes Food: Dec 8, 2010

The Peccadillo posted:

We're gonna invade, for democracy

https://twitter.com/Politics_SMHAGE/status/1323443766900912129

# ? Nov 3, 2020 04:27

starkebn: May 18, 2004; "Oooh, got a little too serious. You okay there, little buddy?"

The Peccadillo posted:

We're gonna invade, for democracy

"well if Trump won't concede defeat we should say something. Guys ... ?"

# ? Nov 3, 2020 04:30

thatbastardken: Apr 23, 2010; A contract signed by a minor is not binding!

Kazzah posted:

GREEN N GOLD DAWN

I reckon we could maybe take Alaska. Hawaii if the Navy isn't there.

# ? Nov 3, 2020 05:33

GoldStandardConure: Jun 11, 2010; I have to kill fast
and mayflies too slow; Pillbug

thatbastardken posted:

I reckon we could maybe take Alaska. Hawaii if the Navy isn't there.

we can just release a shitload of emus onto the mainland, they'll do all the work for us.

# ? Nov 3, 2020 05:47

hambeet: Sep 13, 2002

jacqui lambi will lead a peace keeping force to monitor a smooth transition of power

# ? Nov 3, 2020 05:47

Senor Tron: May 26, 2006

thatbastardken posted:

I reckon we could maybe take Alaska. Hawaii if the Navy isn't there.

Went well the last time someone attacked Hawaii.

# ? Nov 3, 2020 05:52

Animal Friend: Sep 7, 2011

Horse euthanized at cup today.

gently caress horse racing.

# ? Nov 3, 2020 05:58

bell jar: Feb 25, 2009

It should have been wearing a helmet

# ? Nov 3, 2020 06:17

JBP: Feb 16, 2017; You've got to know, to understand,
Baby, take me by my hand,
I'll lead you to the promised land.

Horse never had it's jobkeeper cut, it had a fine life.

# ? Nov 3, 2020 06:19

Animal Friend: Sep 7, 2011

kirbysuperstar posted:

Is there a reason you call them a friend

Because I've know him for years. He's always had some wierd fringe beliefs but mostly harmless UFO and alternative spiritual stuff. He quit his retail job like 2 months into lockdown because he got on jobseeker and has spent all his time since stoned and on YouTube.

He's exactly the kind of person to fall into the Q/infowars radicalisation pipeline. No past interest or engagement in politics (openly bragged about never voting), never reads the news, already involved in fringe communities online, grew up on 4chan... add that to the effects the lockdown is generating with all these protests (where people are talking about Q and NWO vaccines/microchips) and he cracked.

I'm just trying to keep him sane but just talking to him is getting difficult.

# ? Nov 3, 2020 07:00

thatbastardken: Apr 23, 2010; A contract signed by a minor is not binding!

Senor Tron posted:

Went well the last time someone attacked Hawaii.

The last time the Navy was there, hence my qualification.

# ? Nov 3, 2020 07:01

kirbysuperstar: Nov 11, 2012; Let the fools who stand before us be destroyed by the power you and I possess.

Animal Friend posted:

Because I've know him for years. He's always had some wierd fringe beliefs but mostly harmless UFO and alternative spiritual stuff. He quit his retail job like 2 months into lockdown because he got on jobseeker and has spent all his time since stoned and on YouTube.

He's exactly the kind of person to fall into the Q/infowars radicalisation pipeline. No past interest or engagement in politics (openly bragged about never voting), never reads the news, already involved in fringe communities online, grew up on 4chan... add that to the effects the lockdown is generating with all these protests (where people are talking about Q and NWO vaccines/microchips) and he cracked.

I'm just trying to keep him sane but just talking to him is getting difficult.

That fuckin' sucks, I'm sorry.

# ? Nov 3, 2020 07:10

Amoeba102: Jan 22, 2010

Animal Friend posted:

Horse euthanized at cup today.

gently caress horse racing.

That's Dead Horse day for ya.

Dead horses for the racing god and all that.

# ? Nov 3, 2020 08:31

Sulla Faex: May 14, 2010; No man ever did me so much good, or enemy so much harm, but I repaid him with ENDLESS SHITPOSTING

Animal Friend posted:

Because I've know him for years. He's always had some wierd fringe beliefs but mostly harmless UFO and alternative spiritual stuff. He quit his retail job like 2 months into lockdown because he got on jobseeker and has spent all his time since stoned and on YouTube.

He's exactly the kind of person to fall into the Q/infowars radicalisation pipeline. No past interest or engagement in politics (openly bragged about never voting), never reads the news, already involved in fringe communities online, grew up on 4chan... add that to the effects the lockdown is generating with all these protests (where people are talking about Q and NWO vaccines/microchips) and he cracked.

I'm just trying to keep him sane but just talking to him is getting difficult.

i've heard this story before, aren't you the lady who got her face ripped off by that chimp she had since a baby

# ? Nov 3, 2020 09:11

Flannelette: Jan 17, 2010

The Peccadillo posted:

We're gonna invade, for democracy

https://twitter.com/Politics_SMHAGE/status/1323443766900912129

It's 2020, Australia accidentally gaining control of the US government would still track.

# ? Nov 3, 2020 10:46

Sulla Faex: May 14, 2010; No man ever did me so much good, or enemy so much harm, but I repaid him with ENDLESS SHITPOSTING

Flannelette posted:

It's 2020, Australia accidentally gaining control of the US government would still track.

2021 alt history proposal: trump refuses to concede 2020 election, invades world; general abbott shirt-fronts a US carrier fleet, US surrenders; australia annexes indonesia over a mining concessions dispute; LNP gently caress up the gerrymandering and australia and the US are absorbed into the new Indonesian Federation; indonesia oversees a functional NBN rollout through australia

# ? Nov 3, 2020 11:44

The Peccadillo: Mar 4, 2013; We Have Important Work To Do

The interim period steward and his deputy, who will work tirelessly to ensure a free and fair election

# ? Nov 3, 2020 12:11

The Peccadillo: Mar 4, 2013; We Have Important Work To Do

In the region

# ? Nov 3, 2020 12:15

Homora Gaykemi: Apr 30, 2020; by Fluffdaddy

Once we active the subliminal programming in Rupert Murdoch and seize control of the American media apparatus they won't stand a chance

# ? Nov 3, 2020 12:22

A Sometimes Food: Dec 8, 2010

At best, the next day or so is going to suck.

# ? Nov 3, 2020 12:50

The Lord Bude: May 23, 2007; ASK ME ABOUT MY SHITTY, BOUGIE INTERIOR DECORATING ADVICE

Why LNP Lost the Election

quote:

The LNP is beset by a bunch of lazy, incompetent and irrelevant members who are clueless about the hard work required to beat Labor at a Queensland election. The fundamental difference between the two parties couldn�t be more stark, writes Steven Wardill.

As the LNP sets about pulping the signs of another generation of failed candidates � and picking another leader � the party�s remaining MPs have been trotting out familiar excuses.

It was Deb Frecklington�s fault, Labor�s fearmongering about borders, the hopeless efforts of party headquarters or some combination of the above.

Yet if these MPs really want to know why they�ve been trounced again, why they�ll spend the next four years wallowing in opposition, they all, with few exceptions, only need to look in the mirror for the answer.

From frontbench to backbench, the LNP is beset by a bunch of lazy, incompetent and irrelevant members who are clueless about the hard work required to beat Labor at a Queensland election.

Saturday night�s also-rans, like Amanda Cooper, Janet Wishart, Fiona Gaske and Henry Pike, would have served the party�s interests far better than many of the layabout bench-warmers left in safe seats who aren�t willing to get off their rear ends.

What�s left of the LNP is a modest army of mostly greying old men in greying old suits, a group so homogenous that it�s difficult to distinguish one from the other.

In the north, one party stalwart is already banging on about how the LNP merger is the issue and a regional deputy leader the answer.

What bunkum.

As one prominent LNP figure put it �the Titanic didn�t sink itself. The crew did it�.

Labor has been a single party with Brisbane-based leaders for decades and it manages to win regional seats.

Why?

Partly it�s because of the way Labor sets about building regional members into brands, like Bruce Saunders in Maryborough, Barry O�Rourke in Rockhampton and Aaron �I used to be a paramedic� Harper in Thuringowa, which works to increase their profile in local media markets.

The LNP used to have figures like Lawrence Springborg and Jeff Seeney who could traverse the divide between the boardrooms of Brisbane and the bush, and icons like Vaughan Johnson who stood for something.

These days the party�s western MPs don braces and flash suits when they come to state parliament but once they leave their property�s front fence no one knows who they are.

On the Gold Coast, the party�s older MPs spend their time at the track, posting Instagram selfies and lamenting about what might have been.

Or there�s the totemic treachery of the �retired� Jann Stuckey and her laughable claim she used to single-handedly win Currumbin.

Stuckey has set about trying to tear down her successor to prove this point, even though her replacement is a young woman and precisely what the LNP needs.

Compare that to Labor�s Meaghan Scanlon, who has taken her seat of Gaven from marginal to safe after Labor got behind her and built up her brand.

Or young LNP tyro Sam O�Connor who has worked tirelessly.

Sure, Frecklington�s campaign didn�t work because it pretended the pandemic was over when Queensland voters had a different idea.

Her �big, bold and ambitious� New Bradfield Scheme, Bruce Highway upgrade and rego rebate would have been great policies at a normal election but they wouldn�t have stopped people catching coronavirus.

One Labor figure told me months ago that the LNP�s problem was its failure to differentiate Frecklington from Annastacia Palaszczuk.

�It�s a choice between the red one they know and the blue one they don�t,� they said.

But rather than seek to distinguish Frecklington, the LNP campaign dressed her up in hi-viz workwear and made her the mirror image of Palaszczuk.

Trying to out �Annastacia� Annastacia was never going to work.

The Monday�s experts of LNP headquarters will be claiming the result confirms their view that Frecklington wasn�t cutting it before coronavirus came along and vindicates their ill-fated attempt to blast her of the job.

�The only thing they were more scared of than Annastacia winning was Deb winning,� is how one figure saw it.

Yet given they couldn�t print the correct sized signs, organise how-to-vote cards to arrive on time or come up with a half decent negative advertising campaign, maybe in future its best they stick to their lane.

And then on election day, two former LNP presidents thought it a grand idea to sup with big Clive Palmer on his super yacht. This is despite the billionaire businessman being political kryptonite in Queensland and contesting the election against the party they used to lead. �Do you reckon (former Labor president) Dick Williams or (union boss) Bill Ludwig would have been socialising with Bob Brown?� one Labor identity pointed out.

That image will be used forever to link the LNP to Palmer.

The fundamental difference between Labor and the LNP couldn�t be more stark.

One side is packed full of hardworking people who wake every day willing to do what it takes to win the next election.

The other side just arrogantly assumes Queenslanders will come to their senses and their only effort between elections is to raise their hand every so often to chop and change the leader.

What a bunch of losers.

Would the class like to guess where this article was published? Spoiler: it was the courier mail. Murdoch must be super pissed at them.

# ? Nov 4, 2020 19:15

Senor Tron: May 26, 2006

Bolt continues to be broken brained:

https://twitter.com/cameronwilson/status/1324117321300942849?s=20

(it's real)

# ? Nov 5, 2020 00:11

The Peccadillo: Mar 4, 2013; We Have Important Work To Do

https://twitter.com/AntonyGreenABC/status/1324136703167090690

# ? Nov 5, 2020 02:40

Animal Friend: Sep 7, 2011

Oh great Victoria is giving money to Elon Musk!

# ? Nov 5, 2020 07:06

JBP: Feb 16, 2017; You've got to know, to understand,
Baby, take me by my hand,
I'll lead you to the promised land.

Animal Friend posted:

Oh great Victoria is giving money to Elon Musk!

It's nice that they are donating money to him for no reason with no expectation of a product or service in return.

# ? Nov 5, 2020 07:10

Animal Friend: Sep 7, 2011

JBP posted:

It's nice that they are donating money to him for no reason with no expectation of a product or service in return.

Tesla is sham company run by a creepy billionaire and the Victorian government has decided to do business with them and it is disappointing.

# ? Nov 5, 2020 07:14

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# ? May 24, 2024 00:59

Electric Wrigglies: Feb 6, 2015

eh, Musk is a wierdo but the results of SpaceX in particular and Tesla to a lesser extant are undeniable. Additionally, Victoria is not buying the cars which seems to be the most precarious of products from Tesla but the battery arrays which are a lot more straight forward.

# ? Nov 5, 2020 07:22

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