UKMT Summer 2021: I didn't paddleboard while Kabul fell, the sea was closed

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Debate & Discussion > UKMT Summer 2021: I didn't paddleboard while Kabul fell, the sea was closed

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Do you prefer the extended summer thread format? This poll is closed.
Yes	126	44.21%
No	39	13.68%
I'm Scottish	120	42.11%
Total:	285 votes

[Edit Poll (moderators only)]

OwlFancier: Aug 22, 2013

Borrovan posted:

All towns have exactly one good chippy, apart from Redcar & Whitby, which apparently don't

I do have favorites but I don't think I've ever been to what I would call a particularly bad chippy, it's more just like "is it worth the money" and "do they give you a good plasitc fork/do they charge for tomato sauce"

I live near the sea so I guess it's quite hard to have bad chippies here because there's too much competition.

I did go to a really nice one at robin hood's bay which had the crispiest batter I've ever tasted.

# ? Jun 22, 2021 18:00

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# ? May 26, 2024 11:44

kecske: Feb 28, 2011; it's round, like always

Azza Bamboo posted:

What I find patronising is when I'm offered an apprenticeship for an entry level role. Firstly, you're a cheapass oval office. Secondly, you don't need a BTEC Level 2 to move poo poo in a warehouse, and you don't need two years to study for a Level 2. Either admit you're a cheapass oval office, or admit your evaluation of me is someone who needs two years to be taught how to move boxes.

it's because roles branded as apprenticeships get financial kickbacks from the government, so everything from throwing poo poo into a skip to sweeping up hair is an apprenticeship

# ? Jun 22, 2021 18:02

ThomasPaine: Feb 4, 2009; We have no compassion and we ask no compassion from you. When our turn comes, we shall not make excuses for the terror.

It's really very strange that even the worst fish supper from a proper seaside chippy is always going to be better than the same from a fancy pub.

Gort posted:

Eh, there's some very nice cheddars out there. I'm partial to Black Bomber.

No need to limit yourself to just eating British food though, you can get a nice baked Camembert to dip crusty bread into or whatever if that's your jam

Yes this is the correct position, I'm tbh more saying that British cheese easily holds up to continental ones not that it's better, just depends what you fancy.

# ? Jun 22, 2021 18:02

frytechnician: Jan 8, 2004; Happy to see me?

goddamnedtwisto posted:

I've half an idea for a blog or a podcasr, maybe a THAT FUCKER JAGO HAZZARD style video series, so thought I'd bounce it off my test audience here.

"Crossroads of History" - yes I know it's a poo poo name* but the concept intrigues me. Basically, tell local history through the history of a specific junction. By necessity it won't be something that can be easily themed, but that's sort of the point - the theme is actually just how weirdly diverse the local history of an area can be, by rooting it in a purely physical space rather than trying to stretch the physical to meet a concept.

The thought came to me this morning as I crossed Sidney Street at the junction with Whitechapel Road. Standing in the middle of the junction... well that would get you killed, but *conceptually* standing in the middle of the junction and you've got ridiculous amounts of history in literally every direction. To the northwest you have the Blind Beggar. Now the Krays bore the arse off me, frankly, but the name of the pub itself is a fantastic bit of local folklore. I can't be bothered going through every compass point but believe me, from the Sally Army to Winston Churchill almost getting shot by anarchists, believe me there's a lot going on.

My thinking is that limiting my scope in that way hopefully avoids the sprawl of my other projects which ends up demoralising me - it also removes what feels like the imposition on the reader/listener/viewer to actually go to the place or even to know they *might* be interested in it. Like if there's any actual lesson from the reception my random braindumps get is that - for the most part - most people don't even know they're interested in something until I start blathering on, and really all of my projects to this point have actually just been thinly-veiled excuses to dump this stuff rather than just saying "here's some poo poo I know".

However I still feel like I need *some* kind of excuse, if only to anchor myself and stop running off on completely pointless tangents.

Anyway, what do you think? Too contrived? Too limiting, in that it basically restricts me entirely to local history (unless I get particularly lucky)? The literal greatest idea in history?

* Originally thought "Up The Junction" but then someone would insist I'd do either Clapham Junction or Deptford and bollocks to South London, although now I think of it I *could* do one about Blackheath, where Squeeze first formed...

Have sent you a PM about this.

# ? Jun 22, 2021 18:06

Bobby Deluxe: May 9, 2004

OwlFancier posted:

https://twitter.com/MoneyTelegraph/status/1406918607276285953

ONLY EIGHT HUNDRED THOUSAND POUNDS TAX FREE

HAVE YOU NO HEART MR SUNAK?? WHAT OF MY POOR IMPOVERISHED CHILDREN?

I have long had a theory that the tories have spent the last few elections actively trying to lose elections so that they don't actually have to deal with all of the brexit poo poo they set off, and then when everything is back to normal they can set it off.

Keith's Labour has gotten so bad that literally the only way they can tank their chances is to attack pensioners.

# ? Jun 22, 2021 18:07

Borrovan: Aug 15, 2013; IT IS ME.
🧑‍💼
I AM THERESA MAY

OwlFancier posted:

I do have favorites but I don't think I've ever been to what I would call a particularly bad chippy, it's more just like "is it worth the money" and "do they give you a good plasitc fork/do they charge for tomato sauce"

I live near the sea so I guess it's quite hard to have bad chippies here because there's too much competition.

I did go to a really nice one at robin hood's bay which had the crispiest batter I've ever tasted.

jfc I went to a chippy in Studley a while back & they did charge for ketchup, but they charged the normal supermarket price for a small bottle, loving miles better than the little sachets that have enough for exactly one chip, was well chuffed to pay for that

The chippies near the sea front are rubbish here, the decent ones are hidden away. I always figured the ones on the sea front can charge anything for any old rubbish & people will still like it :shrug:

# ? Jun 22, 2021 18:10

Paperhouse: Dec 31, 2008; I think
your hair
looks much
better
pushed
over to
one side

Jel Shaker posted:

don�t agree with the cheeses but yeah there�s some good food out there in ol blighty, unfortunately some of the good stuff just won�t pass the �ick� test eg tripe

funny what does and doesn't pass the ick test depending on your sensibilities. I've met people here (Vietnam) who are absolutely fine with tripe and other innards and stuff like that, but a bit of mild cheddar doesn't pass their ick test because cheese is weird moldy milk

# ? Jun 22, 2021 18:14

Jaeluni Asjil: Apr 18, 2018; Sorry I thought you were a landlord when I gave you your old avatar!

Bobstar posted:

Oh yes, totally that too. And this is a situation where simplification and education need to meet in the middle (which is, after all, where the truth is located). People need to be taught to refer to their body parts accurately. Reminds me of a story I've seen in a couple of permutations, (spoilered for child sexual abuse) where a young girl reports her her uncle doing something with her cookie, and the teacher laughs it off, then later the child refers to her vulva as her cookie and the teacher has an "oh poo poo" moment. One of those horrible stories that's probably both an urban legend and has also happened

Given that one mother-of-a-5-year-old in my near-family has been training her daughter to refer to the relevant parts as her 'frou frou' (frill), very probably.

# ? Jun 22, 2021 18:21

Saros: Dec 29, 2009; Its almost like we're a Bureaucracy, in space!

I set sail for the Planet of Lab Requisitions!!

Bobby Deluxe posted:

I have long had a theory that the tories have spent the last few elections actively trying to lose elections so that they don't actually have to deal with all of the brexit poo poo they set off, and then when everything is back to normal they can set it off.

Keith's Labour has gotten so bad that literally the only way they can tank their chances is to attack pensioners.

Nah this isn't gonna hit pensioners, and they will grandfather in anyone over 50 or so. It's just another measure to shaft the young.

# ? Jun 22, 2021 18:22

Tarnop: Nov 25, 2013; Pull me out

Borrovan posted:

The chippies near the sea front are rubbish here, the decent ones are hidden away. I always figured the ones on the sea front can charge anything for any old rubbish & people will still like it

This was very much the case when I lived in Brighton

# ? Jun 22, 2021 18:44

Miftan: Mar 31, 2012; Terry knows what he can do with his bloody chocolate orange...

Paperhouse posted:

funny what does and doesn't pass the ick test depending on your sensibilities. I've met people here (Vietnam) who are absolutely fine with tripe and other innards and stuff like that, but a bit of mild cheddar doesn't pass their ick test because cheese is weird moldy milk

They're not wrong though.

# ? Jun 22, 2021 18:49

namesake: Jun 19, 2006; "When I was a girl, around 12 or 13, I had a fantasy that I'd grow up to marry Captain Scarlet, but he'd be busy fighting the Mysterons so I'd cuckold him with the sexiest people I could think of - Nigel Mansell, Pat Sharp and Mr. Blobby."

It's true everywhere. Tourist spots have crap food because they have waves of new customers who don't know what they're getting until they've paid and the amount of repeat customers lost is tiny, food services attached to static communities have to rely on repeat customers so need to offer a level of cusine and eating experience at a cost that'll keep them coming back.

Basically find the places that are open even in the tourist off seasons and buy from there.

# ? Jun 22, 2021 18:51

Small Strange Bird: Sep 22, 2006; Merci, chaton!

OwlFancier posted:

I do have favorites but I don't think I've ever been to what I would call a particularly bad chippy, it's more just like "is it worth the money" and "do they give you a good plasitc fork/do they charge for tomato sauce"

gently caress you Harry Ramsden's and your '50p for a little Heinz plastic squeezy pouch that's enough for half a portion of chips' bullshit. :argh:

# ? Jun 22, 2021 19:06

goddamnedtwisto: Dec 31, 2004; If you ask me about the mole people in the London Underground, I WILL be forced to kill you; Fun Shoe

My local chippy used to fantastic but they've definitely gone downhill over the last few years. Weirdly though while the chips have dropped to "terrible" - somehow both mushy *and* undercooked - the fish has only gone from "amazing" to "pretty good". Don't understand how you van get the former wrong but the latter right, but they've somehow managed it.

# ? Jun 22, 2021 19:25

sebzilla: Mar 17, 2009; Kid's blasting everything in sight with that new-fangled musket.

If I was going to concoct the perfect chippy tea in my town it would involve going to three separate establishments. One for high quality and generously-portioned chips, one for vegan delights (battered pickles and tofish) and one for the best curry sauce (Chinese-style)

# ? Jun 22, 2021 19:36

Tarnop: Nov 25, 2013; Pull me out

goddamnedtwisto posted:

My local chippy used to fantastic but they've definitely gone downhill over the last few years. Weirdly though while the chips have dropped to "terrible" - somehow both mushy *and* undercooked - the fish has only gone from "amazing" to "pretty good". Don't understand how you van get the former wrong but the latter right, but they've somehow managed it.

Sounds like someone decided that they could cook more chips in one go without realising that a huge pile of potato cools the oil down resulting in chips just like you describe. Whereas the fish will probably still be battered individually and so how badly you can overload the fish fryer is at least throttled slightly by prep speed.

# ? Jun 22, 2021 19:36

Bobby Deluxe: May 9, 2004

Growing up in a seaside town, I can confirm that the best chippies are inland. Look for a chippy that's near a row of shops that normal people from the nearby estate are queueing up for.

Yes I mean Seashells in Monkseaton.

# ? Jun 22, 2021 19:41

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

Can't get much more inland than Leicester.

Not sure about the fish though, you might be better with a chip cob.

# ? Jun 22, 2021 19:46

serious gaylord: Sep 16, 2007; what.

goddamnedtwisto posted:

Aah, a few tweets last night suddenly make sense.

For those not up on political and journalistic drama and the twitter metadrama around it - last month, after Hartlepool, Tim Shipman, political editor of the Sunday Times, posted that it was interesting how intensely LOTO defended Chapman, an advisor to Starmer, then intriguingly mentioned that Chapman was banned from Starmer's home. Shipman then went completely silent for almost a week before quietly deleting that tweet (but *not* the ones about how intensely Chapman was being defended) and posting:

https://twitter.com/shippersunbound/status/1395045719187283971?lang=en

The Shitpost Left had a field day with this, and them offering their support and love to a Murdoch political journalist was one of the stranger political sights of the year. Anyway last night someone - I *think* @wariotifo - posted that he'd heard that Shipman had had his phone confiscated for 24 hours, and a couple of other people in the RP/TF blob posted allusions to a big story. No idea how a bunch of random podcasters seemed to be on top of the story 12 hours ago (or why they've now all deleted the tweets rather than going on a lap of honour) but there we go.

Did the police investigate him or something? Can't see why his phone would be confiscated otherwise.

# ? Jun 22, 2021 19:49

Failed Imagineer: Sep 22, 2018

Guavanaut posted:

Can't get much more inland than Leicester.

By this logic the best chipper should be found somewhere in the deserts of northern Xinjiang

# ? Jun 22, 2021 19:52

therattle: Jul 24, 2007; Soiled Meat

I haven't had fish and chips since at least February of last year.

# ? Jun 22, 2021 19:53

OwlFancier: Aug 22, 2013

There is probably a place that sells them unless you moved to another country.

# ? Jun 22, 2021 19:55

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

they put scotland match on loving itv 4 in NI and england on UTV and itv2 :scotland:

# ? Jun 22, 2021 20:04

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

only other thing on itv4 is carry on films afaik

# ? Jun 22, 2021 20:04

Jel Shaker: Apr 19, 2003

Failed Imagineer posted:

By this logic the best chipper should be found somewhere in the deserts of northern Xinjiang

there will be some cave with the finest horse cheese humanity ever created

# ? Jun 22, 2021 20:05

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

babs windsor (rip) getting her baps out

OOOOOOOOOH!!!

OOOOOOOOOH!!!!!! :sparkles:

like that

and then sid james (rip) goes nyehehehehehehhhh :laugh:

like that

# ? Jun 22, 2021 20:06

goddamnedtwisto: Dec 31, 2004; If you ask me about the mole people in the London Underground, I WILL be forced to kill you; Fun Shoe

serious gaylord posted:

Did the police investigate him or something? Can't see why his phone would be confiscated otherwise.

They were joking that as a story involving Starmer and Chapman was about to come out that Shippers' phone would be taken off him by his bosses and/or his lawyers to stop him tweeting anything that might get him into trouble.

# ? Jun 22, 2021 20:12

Josef bugman: Nov 17, 2011; Pictured: Poster prepares to celebrate Holy Communion (probablY)

This avatar made possible by a gift from the Religionthread Posters Relief Fund

I kind of want sausage and chips now.

# ? Jun 22, 2021 20:16

goddamnedtwisto: Dec 31, 2004; If you ask me about the mole people in the London Underground, I WILL be forced to kill you; Fun Shoe

crispix posted:

they put scotland match on loving itv 4 in NI and england on UTV and itv2

Not sure if it's different on the NI transmitter(s) but at least at Crystal Palace ITV4 is on a different MUX and has a shitload more bandwidth than ITV2, because it was originally intended for Sky Sports before they were told they couldn't encrypt the signal.

# ? Jun 22, 2021 20:16

Bobby Deluxe: May 9, 2004

Failed Imagineer posted:

By this logic the best chipper should be found somewhere in the deserts of northern Xinjiang

Ah - to clarify, the best fish and chip shops in a seaside town will be found in more inland locations within that town.

# ? Jun 22, 2021 20:17

Trickjaw: Jun 23, 2005; Nadie puede dar lo que no tiene

crispix posted:

only other thing on itv4 is carry on films afaik

I'd rather the Carry Ons, tbh.

If Keith flounces off tomorrow (leaving behind an empty office) I wonder if RLB fancies another crack at it?

# ? Jun 22, 2021 20:23

goddamnedtwisto: Dec 31, 2004; If you ask me about the mole people in the London Underground, I WILL be forced to kill you; Fun Shoe

Bobby Deluxe posted:

Ah - to clarify, the best fish and chip shops in a seaside town will be found in more inland locations within that town.

So I can cancel that holiday to that place in Derbyshire then? Thank gently caress.

# ? Jun 22, 2021 20:23

a pipe smoking dog: Jan 25, 2010; "haha, dogs can't smoke!"

keep punching joe posted:

For the consideration of UKMT

https://twitter.com/leomiklasz/status/1407322921299853317

Update on this: apparently the government have scheduled their day for indoctrinating kids on the importance of the union after scottish schools break up for holidays.

# ? Jun 22, 2021 20:29

Pistol_Pete: Sep 15, 2007; Oven Wrangler

Trickjaw posted:

I'd rather the Carry Ons, tbh.

If Keith flounces off tomorrow (leaving behind an empty office) I wonder if RLB fancies another crack at it?

I think he wants to throw in the towel but the people who backed him in the 1st place won't let him and he's continually stuck between the fear of confronting them and the dread of facing another day as party leader.

# ? Jun 22, 2021 20:30

EvilHawk: Sep 15, 2009; LIVARPOOL!

Klopp's 13pts clear thanks to video ref

I'm always very confused that chinese chippies aren't really a thing down south, because my local when I was growing up and my now-fiance's family chippy are both chinese as well so it just always seemed to be normal to me. Nothing better than chips and special fried rice imo

# ? Jun 22, 2021 20:30

Party Boat: Nov 1, 2007; where did that other dog come from

who is he

goddamnedtwisto posted:

So I can cancel that holiday to That Plaice in Derbyshire then? Thank gently caress.

# ? Jun 22, 2021 20:33

Lady Demelza: Dec 29, 2009; Lipstick Apathy

Flu jabs have been a thing for years, it's not a new word. And if you hate that it, wait until you find out about vax/unvaxxed!

The NHS did a whole review of the language they used a few years ago and opted to choose the words everyone knew, even if they sounded childish, because they don't care if you're annoyed, they care that you understand. Everyone knows what 'poo' is, but there will be loads of people who think 'stool' only refers to a piece of furniture. Everyone knows what 'wee' is, but it may not be immediately obvious if someone is relying on a screenreader, and 'provide a wee sample' in Scotland can be interpreted two ways. And, like someone else said, medical and colloquial meanings of words like 'stomach' can confuse matters. Actually, medical and medical meanings of words can confuse matters. You don't get cervical cancer in your cervical spine.

# ? Jun 22, 2021 20:35

Failed Imagineer: Sep 22, 2018

Poz my neg arm with jab fluid

# ? Jun 22, 2021 20:36

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

a pipe smoking dog posted:

Update on this: apparently the government have scheduled their day for indoctrinating kids on the importance of the union after scottish schools break up for holidays.

What's the significance of June 25 anyway?

I'm all for having a national day that isn't just some religion dude that never set foot anywhere near here or some poo poo, but what even is the date supposed to be?

Just a day off work where I can drink? They could have given me more notice.

# ? Jun 22, 2021 20:54

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# ? May 26, 2024 11:44

Camrath: Mar 19, 2004; The UKMT Fudge Baron

EvilHawk posted:

I'm always very confused that chinese chippies aren't really a thing down south, because my local when I was growing up and my now-fiance's family chippy are both chinese as well so it just always seemed to be normal to me. Nothing better than chips and special fried rice imo

Having spent my entire life in either London or Aberdeen I had never experienced a Chinese chippy before moving here. Our village has one, and while the Chinese food is merely �fine� they literally do the best chips I have had in my life. Thick cut, but cooked so they�re crispy as hell. And served in portions so massive even I can�t finish them.

We�ve been there every week since we moved here, bar one when I was trading at a market in Leicester. They were so worried, they came out to check on me when I was visiting the next door co-op. Also apparently one of the staff calls me her boyfriend because I always tip well.

God I love that place.

# ? Jun 22, 2021 20:56

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Debate & Discussion > UKMT Summer 2021: I didn't paddleboard while Kabul fell, the sea was closed

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