[UFOs] watch Mellon start an intergalactic war

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > C-SPAM > [UFOs] watch Mellon start an intergalactic war

«‹›2520 »

(Thread IKs: sharknado slashfic)

The Saucer Hovers: May 16, 2005

Justin Tyme posted:

Another BIG FAT FART like every other grift surrounding this ufo bullshit

# ? Dec 6, 2021 18:00

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 30, 2024 10:18

PawParole: Nov 16, 2019

https://thedebrief.org/darpa-funded-researchers-accidentally-create-the-worlds-first-warp-bubble/?utm_sq=gx4kv63vzz

warp drive article out

# ? Dec 6, 2021 18:09

fanfic insert: Nov 4, 2009

Mola Yam posted:

Look again at that forum. That's here. That's home. That's us. On it everyone you love, everyone you know, everyone you ever heard of, every poster who ever was, lived out their lives. The aggregate of our joy and suffering, thousands of confident image macros, bad takes, and shitposts, every and , every and , every and , every and , every , every and , , and , every , every , every , every , every and in the history of our species posted there--on a mote of dust suspended in a flooded New Orleans server room.

The Forums are a very small stage in a vast cosmic arena. Think of the rivers of blood spilled by all those mods and admins so that, in glory and triumph, they could become the momentary masters of a fraction of a dot. Think of the endless red text avatars visited by the inhabitants of one corner of this forum on the scarcely distinguishable inhabitants of some other corner, how frequent their misunderstandings, how eager they are to report one another, how fervent their QCS posts.

Our posturings, our imagined self-importance, the delusion that we have some privileged position on the Internet, are challenged by this Alexa traffic rank. Our forum is a lonely speck in the great enveloping cosmic dark. In our obscurity, in all this vastness, there is no hint that help will come from elsewhere to save us from ourselves.

Something Awful is the only forum known so far to harbor goons. There is nowhere else, at least in the near future, to which our species could migrate. Visit, yes. Settle, not yet. Like it or not, for the moment the Forums are where we make our stand.

It has been said that posting is a humbling and character-building experience. There is perhaps no better demonstration of the folly of human conceits than this distant image of our dead, gay forum. To me, it underscores our responsibility to deal more kindly with one another, and to preserve and cherish the UAP thread in the lefist shitposting subforum of Something Awful, the only home we've ever known.

� Carl Sagan

i cry every time

# ? Dec 6, 2021 18:11

BoldFace: Feb 28, 2011

Edit: wrong thread

# ? Dec 6, 2021 18:12

Polo-Rican: Jul 4, 2004; emptyquote my posts or die

Bearjew posted:

any tips for finding a belted kingfisher

I've been trying and failing to get a good belted kingfisher photo for years. With those guys it's really just patience and luck � you need them to come to you. Since they're always on bodies of water, they'll just fly to the other side of the lake / stream / whatever if you approach them. They're also notoriously grouchy and won't tolerate much human presence... if you walk towards one it'll just go someplace else.

Since they have a deafeningly loud cackle, the key is just to listen, find a spot by the water approximately where you think you heard the call, plop your rear end down, and listen for more calls, while watching all of the branches that hang over the water.

Also, UFOs are real

# ? Dec 6, 2021 18:20

Bilirubin: Feb 16, 2014; The sanctioned action is to CHUG

Polo-Rican posted:

I've been trying and failing to get a good belted kingfisher photo for years. With those guys it's really just patience and luck � you need them to come to you. Since they're always on bodies of water, they'll just fly to the other side of the lake / stream / whatever if you approach them. They're also notoriously grouchy and won't tolerate much human presence... if you walk towards one it'll just go someplace else.

Since they have a deafeningly loud cackle, the key is just to listen, find a spot by the water approximately where you think you heard the call, plop your rear end down, and listen for more calls, while watching all of the branches that hang over the water.

Also, UFOs are real

So like a really big telephoto lens?

BoldFace posted:

Edit: wrong thread

same

# ? Dec 6, 2021 18:22

Polo-Rican: Jul 4, 2004; emptyquote my posts or die

Bilirubin posted:

So like a really big telephoto lens?

I have a pretty good telephoto lens and my kingfisher photos still suck rear end! What you really need is tons of spare time. the bird people who take the best pictures are seemingly unemployed and spend all day every day sitting around waiting for birds

edit: but to legitimately bring it back to UAPs... even with a big telephoto lens and a monopod, it can be difficult to take a good picture of a bird that's in-focus, even if it's close to you. so i'm never surprised that so many uap photos and videos are blurry... it's really difficult unless you have a legit camera setup that's already focused on the sky. it's even hard to photograph something like a 747, which is huge and moves slowly in a straight predictable line

Polo-Rican has issued a correction as of 18:29 on Dec 6, 2021

# ? Dec 6, 2021 18:24

The Saucer Hovers: May 16, 2005

Polo-Rican posted:

the bird people are seemingly unemployed and spend all day every day sitting around waiting for birds

# ? Dec 6, 2021 18:36

Slavvy: Dec 11, 2012

Polo-Rican posted:

I have a pretty good telephoto lens and my kingfisher photos still suck rear end! What you really need is tons of spare time. the bird people who take the best pictures are seemingly unemployed and spend all day every day sitting around waiting for birds

edit: but to legitimately bring it back to UAPs... even with a big telephoto lens and a monopod, it can be difficult to take a good picture of a bird that's in-focus, even if it's close to you. so i'm never surprised that so many uap photos and videos are blurry... it's really difficult unless you have a legit camera setup that's already focused on the sky. it's even hard to photograph something like a 747, which is huge and moves slowly in a straight predictable line

What I've found, having a long lens and an interest in birds and planes, is that birds never hold still which makes it hard, but planes tend to be really loving far away, despite seeming so huge with the naked eye, and make all that zoom multiplication seem like nothing. And this is literally by the airport on landing approaches.

UAP's combine both of these features. It doesn't matter how many lenses your iphone has, you are not taking anything like a legible picture of a weird thing zipping around the sky.

# ? Dec 6, 2021 18:47

Jazerus: May 24, 2011

# ? Dec 6, 2021 19:39

Good Soldier Svejk: Jul 5, 2010

PawParole posted:

https://thedebrief.org/darpa-funded-researchers-accidentally-create-the-worlds-first-warp-bubble/?utm_sq=gx4kv63vzz

warp drive article out

This is the part where the federation comes to welcome their new intergalactic brethren with open arms right

or is this the other thing where the interstellar teamsters come and break all of our poo poo rather than risk us getting out into the universe and human-ing it up with our quarrelsome ways

# ? Dec 6, 2021 20:59

Justin Tyme: Feb 22, 2011

No this is the part where reddit and nasaspaceflight.com nerds spend six years trying to create a device based on incorrect physics that doesn't work while IFLS breathlessly and uncritically copy pastes the same derivative article over and over again

# ? Dec 6, 2021 21:02

Rah!: Feb 21, 2006

Justin Tyme posted:

The downed roswell craft was literally a weather balloon. It was a mylar balloon loaded with experimental top secret infrasound acoustic equipment used to spy on soviet atmospheric nuclear tests

Justin Tyme posted:

On the flipside, what is the most uninteresting and frustratingly stupid conclusion to all this? I'm picturing a Balloon Boy-rear end finale where it turns out its all about an Apple drone or something that is able to dive underwater and transition to flying, and the speed anomolies are just false readings. The tic-tacs are Facebook internet blimps that got caught in the jet stream.

Justin Tyme posted:

this just looks like meteorite fragments that melt/remelted into funny shapes as it cooled in the atmosphere. maybe the army will make tanks out of "iron" with this knowledge

Justin Tyme posted:

Projected plasma balls is such a slam dunk explanation, has all the observed properties and has obvious military use (spoofing radar signatures)

Justin Tyme posted:

I still think there's something to be said about the radar/instrument-induced plasma clouds or whatever they are. Tracing a path over a surface (or ocean, or against clouds, etc) would have a very fast apparant speed (like the old trick of sweeping a laser pointer over the surface of Jupiter, the point can apparently sweep faster than light!), and the supposed tictac was exactly at a specific coordinate that only the Navy knew suggests it was some phenomenon that was induced by the ships somehow.

lol metabunk is leaking

Justin Tyme posted:

I don't buy that it's government testing because the government would inherently, you know, let their people know testing is occurring so they can get good data. They're not gonna prank themselves for laughs because they'd want the radar data for study. Would make more sense that it would be a private organization or foreign government, and if it was a special access program they wouldn't risk involving anyone not briefed in like that Carnival cruise ship.

the US government would never risk its top secret next-level stuff with these silly and reckless stunts... China, on the other hand :abuela:

Justin Tyme posted:

I enjoy this thread but goons are so drat credulous lmao

Justin Tyme posted:

I'm an aerospace designer

maybe you're right about everything

but also lol

PS plasma is stored in the balls

# ? Dec 6, 2021 21:33

Failson: Sep 2, 2018; Fun Shoe

blatman posted:

did anyone figure out what the moon cube is all about yet

edit: this one https://www.space.com/china-yutu-2-moon-rover-cube-shaped-object-photos

Could be a weird angle on some Soviet-era equipment. The Lunokhod rovers were huge:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lunokhod_1

(hoping for an aitee monolith)

# ? Dec 6, 2021 21:47

Wheeee: Mar 11, 2001; When a tree grows, it is soft and pliable. But when it's dry and hard, it dies.

Hardness and strength are death's companions. Flexibility and softness are the embodiment of life.

That which has become hard shall not triumph.

most of those fine, it's normal to be skeptical of crazy poo poo like UFOs, even now you have to be specifically paying attention to this poo poo to have any idea where the current state of things are at, and at best we're looking at 'yea something's happening, but what'

this one however:

Justin Tyme posted:

I enjoy this thread but goons are so drat credulous lmao

is always fun; maybe the overly credulous one is the guy looking at a sea of shitposts about alien friends and coming away thinking they've witnessed sincere testimony

# ? Dec 6, 2021 21:53

Rah!: Feb 21, 2006

yeah i just think its funny when someone constantly has the answers. especially when it's always answers i dont want to hear lol :argh:

also if being credulous is wrong then i don't want 2 be right

right p'nutty?

if it was possible to project giant top secret plasma balls hundreds of miles away and make them appear to mimic the movement of the craft that are following them , and things like that...that would be cool as gently caress. but it sounds almost as far fetched as theories about aliens or flying mermen or whatever

Rah! has issued a correction as of 23:34 on Dec 6, 2021

# ? Dec 6, 2021 22:07

PokeJoe: Aug 24, 2004; hail cgatan

i did some undergrad research in a lab looking for chemical markers of life in the interstellar medium. what I learned is there's a lot of chemistry happening in space and some of it is suspiciously organic but no concrete evidence of life has been discovered. in my not that professional opinion there's definitely aliens doing space chemistry in space. perhaps even making space LSD

# ? Dec 6, 2021 22:38

The Chad Jihad: Feb 24, 2007

I'm not surprised, but I am disappointed that the answer to FTL wasn't "it's actually incredibly easy. You fool. You imbecile."

# ? Dec 6, 2021 22:42

Tighclops: Jan 23, 2008; Unable to deal with it; Grimey Drawer

Will the James Webb telescope be able to detect weed markers in the light refracted through the atmospheres of extra solar worlds. Is it possible there are alien forms of weed.

# ? Dec 6, 2021 22:42

Wheeee: Mar 11, 2001; When a tree grows, it is soft and pliable. But when it's dry and hard, it dies.

Hardness and strength are death's companions. Flexibility and softness are the embodiment of life.

That which has become hard shall not triumph.

The Chad Jihad posted:

I'm not surprised, but I am disappointed that the answer to FTL wasn't "it's actually incredibly easy. You fool. You imbecile."

read dis

# ? Dec 6, 2021 22:46

The Saucer Hovers: May 16, 2005

Rah! posted:

PS plasma is stored in the balls

# ? Dec 6, 2021 22:51

Justin Tyme: Feb 22, 2011

Wheeee posted:

read dis

Pro read

I will never stop posting and no p'nutty will stop me :colbert:

# ? Dec 6, 2021 23:01

err: Apr 11, 2005; I carry my own weight no matter how heavy this shit gets...

https://twitter.com/latestinspace/status/1467609634823454720

# ? Dec 6, 2021 23:08

Slavvy: Dec 11, 2012

Rah! posted:

lol metabunk is leaking

the US government would never risk its top secret next-level stuff with these silly and reckless stunts... China, on the other hand

maybe you're right about everything

but also lol

PS plasma is stored in the balls

Pretty sure this is a full bingo

# ? Dec 6, 2021 23:32

The Saucer Hovers: May 16, 2005

err posted:

https://twitter.com/latestinspace/status/1467609634823454720

lol even the chinese rover is pulling an aitee

# ? Dec 6, 2021 23:51

Slavvy: Dec 11, 2012

Seeing the blurry zoom, I'm dismayed there's no ring

# ? Dec 6, 2021 23:54

Justin Tyme: Feb 22, 2011

Its the mun arch from kerbal space program

# ? Dec 7, 2021 00:00

Wheeee: Mar 11, 2001; When a tree grows, it is soft and pliable. But when it's dry and hard, it dies.

Hardness and strength are death's companions. Flexibility and softness are the embodiment of life.

That which has become hard shall not triumph.

# ? Dec 7, 2021 00:02

Good Soldier Svejk: Jul 5, 2010

I believe in the slow disclosure of moon cube

# ? Dec 7, 2021 00:05

Nichael: Mar 30, 2011

honey, it's aitee o'clock! time for you to consume your bowl of salt.

# ? Dec 7, 2021 00:09

Jazerus: May 24, 2011

it's moon city. for further details please see my sci-fi wifi thread, welcome to Moon City

# ? Dec 7, 2021 00:19

Failson: Sep 2, 2018; Fun Shoe

Jazerus posted:

it's moon city. for further details please see my sci-fi wifi thread, welcome to Moon City

Love Moon Zero Two!

Going back through various "Warp Drive" breakthrough articles. They crop up frequently:

http://rigorousintuition.blogspot.com/2006/01/space-cadets.html

From 2006:

quote:

A bit of an update of this post from last March, thanks to this thread on the RI discussion board.

An article last week in The Scotsman claimed an "extrordinary 'hyperspace' engine that could make interstellar space travel a reality by flying into other dimensions is being investigated by the United States government." The theory is to create an intense magnetic field that would provide gravitational thrust:

Also, if a large enough magnetic field was created, the craft would slip into a different dimension, where the speed of light is faster, allowing incredible speeds to be reached. Switching off the magnetic field would result in the engine reappearing in our current dimension.

The US air force has expressed an interest in the idea and scientists working for the American Department of Energy - which has a device known as the Z Machine that could generate the kind of magnetic fields required to drive the engine - say they may carry out a test if the theory withstands further scrutiny.

Professor Jochem Hauser, one of the scientists who put forward the idea, told The Scotsman that if everything went well a working engine could be tested in about five years.

Such an article can't help but make me think of Nick Cook's The Hunt for Zero Point. Cook's odyssey began at Jane's Aviation Weekly, when someone anonymously dropped a 1956 clipping on his desk with the headline "The G-Engines Are Coming." In many respects, the 50-year old article was not unlike that in last week's Scotsman: "in the United States and Canada, research centers, scientists, designers and engineers are perfecting a way to control gravity - a force infinitely more powerful than the mighty atom. The result of their labors will be antigravity engines working without fuel - weightless airliners and space ships able to travel at 170,000 miles per second."

Anyone read "The Hunt for Zero Point?"

# ? Dec 7, 2021 00:59

Bilirubin: Feb 16, 2014; The sanctioned action is to CHUG

PokeJoe posted:

i did some undergrad research in a lab looking for chemical markers of life in the interstellar medium. what I learned is there's a lot of chemistry happening in space and some of it is suspiciously organic but no concrete evidence of life has been discovered. in my not that professional opinion there's definitely aliens doing space chemistry in space. perhaps even making space LSD

Space amino acids were reported at some point in the past 10 or so years? IDK can't be arsed to look it up specifically.

I would take the space LSD

# ? Dec 7, 2021 01:05

Bilirubin: Feb 16, 2014; The sanctioned action is to CHUG

err posted:

https://twitter.com/latestinspace/status/1467609634823454720

Русские фонарики или птицы

# ? Dec 7, 2021 01:07

The Demilich: Apr 9, 2020; The First Rites of Men Were Mortuary, the First Altars Tombs.

How many P'nti do you think the average north American adult could take down in a fight?
Do you think the body count would drastically increase if we gave the human a melee weapon?

These are important questions and we need answers.

# ? Dec 7, 2021 01:07

Sleekly: Aug 21, 2008

i wish there was a livefeed from that rover, watching it slowly trundle over there over weeks and months would be cooooool

# ? Dec 7, 2021 01:13

Fly Ricky: May 7, 2009; The Wine Taster

Failson posted:

Anyone read "The Hunt for Zero Point?"

I read it ages ago and something about it kind of pissed me off.

Hope this helps anyone in deciding to read it.

fake edit: Failson do you remember it well and have any idea what�s in it that would make an old bird-watcher mad?

# ? Dec 7, 2021 01:13

Failson: Sep 2, 2018; Fun Shoe

Fly Ricky posted:

I read it ages ago and something about it kind of pissed me off.

Hope this helps anyone in deciding to read it.

fake edit: Failson do you remember it well and have any idea what�s in it that would make an old bird-watcher mad?

I haven't read it, and that's good to know! From reviews and synopsis, I'm guessing the author is one of those military history folks that though Nazis were the best engineers ever? And doesn't site any sources?

# ? Dec 7, 2021 01:46

atelier morgan: Mar 11, 2003; super-scientific, ultra-gay; Lipstick Apathy

Wheeee posted:

read dis

please do not suggest people read harry "robert e lee and erwin rommel are my heroes' turtledove

# ? Dec 7, 2021 01:50

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 30, 2024 10:18

The Saucer Hovers: May 16, 2005

The Demilich posted:

How many P'nti do you think the average north American adult could take down in a fight?
Do you think the body count would drastically increase if we gave the human a melee weapon?

These are important questions and we need answers.

depends on if they have psychic abilities or weird monkey strength

if its just down to pure physicality, half a dozen. hell does pnuit even have teeth?

# ? Dec 7, 2021 02:06

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > C-SPAM > [UFOs] watch Mellon start an intergalactic war

«‹›2520 »