r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

torgo: Aug 13, 2003; Fun Shoe

Ok, this one is scary with a happy ending, then a hilarious epilogue. From /r/legaladvice:

Accidentally sold alcohol to a minor after being told not to card customers.

quote:

Today was my first job at my local baseball stadium, I was a cashier at one of the food vendors. A vendor that sells a lot of alcohol. Within maybe 20 minutes of working, my boss pulled me aside and verbally berated me, telling me we don't have time to card every individual coming through, just use good judgemen. If I can't make good judgement, this isnt the job for me. Which immediately was a huge red flag, but I decided to work the rest of the day and not leave the team hanging, them already being short staffed. That and the job was 15 an hour plus tips.

Low behold 3 customers later I accidentally sold alcohol to a minor. And within 5 minutes of selling, the very angry parents came up demanding to know why their 20 year old daughter was allowed to buy a White Claw. And the only thing I could do was throw my boss under the bus, cause he said, not to card people, because the process took too long or something stupid. Then my boss came out and flipped out on me, and made the whole situation seem like it was my fault, and that he never said anything like that. When one of my co workers started to stand up for me, my boss told her to shut up, or she was gonna be a part of this. My boss told the parents this will be dealt with, he then grabbed my by the back of tje neck like a dog, and yanked me into the back room, into his office, shoved me into the corner of his office, where I've now been waiting for 45 minutes for nothing to happen, with the door locked from the outside. I wad told there are serious consequences to my actions.

So there are warnings all around the stadium about audio and video monitoring is occurring at all times, but I don't know if any of the altercation was recorded, if our conversation was recorded, or if my boss is out there intimidating my co workers into shutting their mouths.

So how screwed am I right now. I know state laws are pretty strict on selling alcohol to minors, but I was literally told dont card or lose your job, then physically assaulted and now I'm being held against my will. And I have to pee so bad I'm thinking about pissing in his fake plant in the corner. I'll update the situation as time goes on.

He posted a brief update in saying the police showed up and were escorting him out, but the thread was locked before any other updates. An interested party tracked him down on /r/needforspeed of all places and asked for an update.

quote:

No update with your selling alcohol to a minor?

quote:

Wow yall really found me on another sub huh? LOL.

Here's what I was gonna post but the tread became locked.

For those who don't know, I posted to r/legaladvice about a work thing today.

Update to the situation. Ive been told by the police not to say too much, other than let you redditors know the situation at hand, and not talk about tje finer details..

This contracted vendor has been under investigation via local and state officials for... reasons. Reasons I won't say. On the other hand, from word of mouth, it seems the stadium hasn't let this dude go as he rakes in lots of money for the stadium, but incidents like this will be the reason why they kick him out.

I'm not the only person who's accidentally sold alcohol to minors.

I am apparently the first person to stand up for myself and throw the boss under the bus, which might have triggered something mentally with the boss, as he's never actually assaulted anyone before, just a lot of yelling and berating.

The police had to get the keys from the manager to get me out.

Lastly, I filed a report on the assault and false imprisonment. Both incidents have a strong backing from witnesses including the unhappy parents. I said nothing about the White Claw, how ever, the police also have strong evidence that I did. But they told me not to worry about that right now, i was given a court date, and a contact info for lawyers.

That is all I can say.

quote:

Any updates on your compulsion to pleasure yourself in quicksand?

quote:

I really need to go back and cover my tracks more. Dman it.

# ? May 18, 2022 05:13

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 14, 2024 00:23

Captain Hygiene: Sep 17, 2007; You mess with the crabbo...

therobit posted:

AITA for getting my eldest daughter a kitten when wife is already overwhelmed with our disabled child?

I hope this guy pats himself on the back so hard he knocks himself down the stairs

# ? May 18, 2022 05:14

therobit: Aug 19, 2008; I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time

Captain Hygiene posted:

I hope this guy pats himself on the back so hard he knocks himself down the stairs

I hope the handful of redditors in the comments that are telling this guy that the state is required to provide care and education for this 5 yo nonverbal autistic child during the school day are listened to and also that he and his wife are able to find support groups that can direct them to resources to help them. The whole family is obviously completely overwhelmed and it is tragic. The thing is that a lot of parents with severe special needs kids don�t even know what they should be doing or where they should be looking and are just kind of thrown into caregiver burnout hell. IMO hospital systems need to do a much better job of preparing the parents and setting them up with social workers to guide them through these processes.

# ? May 18, 2022 05:22

TheBizzness: Oct 5, 2004; Reign on me.

If you can�t even go for a car ride without 2 adults present maybe bringing a kitten into the home isn�t the brightest idea.

# ? May 18, 2022 06:40

Agents are GO!: Dec 29, 2004

I think it would be a good idea after they get appropriate caregiver help.

# ? May 18, 2022 06:53

Breetai: Nov 6, 2005; 🥄Mah spoon is too big!🍌

Agents are GO! posted:

I think it would be a good idea after they get appropriate caregiver help.

Yeah nah. The kid has a history of violent outbursts and destructive behaviour, and I wouldn't introduce a cat into that environment in case the kid antagonizes it, the kitten hisses or swipes at the kid, and then the kid stomps its to death..

# ? May 18, 2022 07:19

Mx.: Dec 16, 2006; I'm a great fan! When I watch TV I'm always saying "That's political correctness gone mad!"
Why thankyew!

AITA for "showing off" after my stepfather kept telling everyone I was poor?

quote:

I(early thirties female) have 2 children that were born when I was 21 and 22. My daughter(eldest) was an accident but my second daughter was deliberate as I found out that I needed a hysterectomy due to medical reasons and being an only child and psyc major I believed it was important that my daughter had a sibling. At the time I had recently (amicably) split from my partner and my step father was strongly against me further ruining my life by having another child due to his belief that you cannot be successful as a singer parent. I ended up going no contact with my mum, step father and 2 half siblings(at the time 10 and 9) over this. My stepfather is in no position to talk as he are mum are far from well off due to his gambling addiction that chewed through my mums savings prior to his recovery.

About 2 years ago my mum reached out to me as she was diagnosed with cancer. She came through it and is now in remission. I am not as close with them as I used to be but things have been improving.

However, my stepfather keeps going on about how I never made it because I don't have a nice car or a fancy apartment in the city or a husband and insisting that I must be poor because I'm not materialistic. I got used to being frugal in my early 20s when I was a poor uni student with 2 kids and just never really changed. I have a very nice Govt job with a 6 figure salary where i work from home but I drive a 2009 Nissan and I own a nice house in the country because I don't see the point in buying a city apartment that I don't need or a flashy car that will have a lovely kms to L ratio.

Things came to a head at a recent family dinner when I told my mum about a budget place to get tires from (hers are almost bald) and my stepfather said "good to have a poor person in the family so we know where the deals are". I got pissed off and told him to stop assuming things about me and walked out with my kids.

Yesterday I notified them of the 60k trust I have set up for my half siblings uni trust fund and took them to buy a vehicle each so they can get to uni. Both are starting this year. I deliberately left the windscreen price stickers on so my stepfather would see how much I spent.

Today my stepfather called me ranting about how I was showing off and how I should keep my mouth shut and respect my elders. My mum texted yo say that he's furious at her for ever contacting me. AITA here?

Edited to add: the trust I've been putting together for a while because I know my half siblings won't get financial support from their parents but the cars I did purely out of spite

a nice productive use of spite

# ? May 18, 2022 08:36

datajugend: Jan 15, 2010; Cat Army

therobit posted:

AITA for getting my eldest daughter a kitten when wife is already overwhelmed with our disabled child?

Kitten going to end up dead

# ? May 18, 2022 08:48

Mx.: Dec 16, 2006; I'm a great fan! When I watch TV I'm always saying "That's political correctness gone mad!"
Why thankyew!

AITA for not giving my sister the money I receive for her children?

quote:

I 38 (f) got my sister who is 35, children out of the system after she lost them. I won't go into details about why she lost her children other then she lost them for a good reason.

I and my husband 40 opened our homes and they came to live with us. My sister is not allowed to vist my neices and nephew without supervision, but since we have had them she has never once requested a visitation. 6 months later she messaged me on Facebook and made small talk about the kids before asking how much do I get paid to have them in my care? I without thinking (Yeah dumb me) told her and she said great you can give me that money since I have no money and she and her current boyfriend are going to be homeless soon. I refused and she asked why do I need it? Me and my husband work and I said it's for her children and only her children. She started screaming at me and said some not so nice things before I cut the call and blocked her on messenger and all social media.

Anyway since then I've been getting pressure from family saying I should give it and that she will living on the streets and when I defended myself and said she should get a job then they immediately reminded me that she will have trouble getting a job because no one will want to hire someone with her past! I went NC with them. But my son is very close to my parents and misses them and asks why he can't see them anymore? Now I'm wondering if AITA and went to far? .

# ? May 18, 2022 08:50

Jabor: Jul 16, 2010; #1 Loser at SpaceChem

grandparents should put up their own money to help younger sister, since they obviously care about that situation so much

# ? May 18, 2022 08:57

Angrymog: Jan 30, 2012; Really Madcats

therobit posted:

AITA for getting my eldest daughter a kitten when wife is already overwhelmed with our disabled child?

I think it's admirable that he's trying to pay attention to the non-autistic child, but giving how violent the autistic one can be I think the kitten or even cat would be one scratch away from having a really bad time

# ? May 18, 2022 09:31

Malachite_Dragon: Mar 31, 2010; Weaving Merry Christmas magic

Mx. posted:

AITA for "showing off" after my stepfather kept telling everyone I was poor?

a nice productive use of spite

Smashing that stepdads face into a big ol' humble pie like a kid into a birthday cake. Dee-licious.

Mx. posted:

AITA for not giving my sister the money I receive for her children?

My sister came so, so close to this level of entitled shithead parent, and I am forever thankful she managed to pull her head out.

# ? May 18, 2022 09:33

Evil Willow: Apr 26, 2007; Bored now...

AITA for refusing to show proof that the car is mine and embarrassing a guy in front of the police officer?

quote:

For some context my (20M) mom (38F) married my step-dad (35M) 10 years ago, they had my brother (8M) Scott. I see my step-dad as my father and his family as my paternal family so I'll refer to him as dad and my step-grandad as Gran.

My dad has a GTR that my Gran gave him a few years ago, that car is sick as gently caress, he also has a normal car that he drives to work so the GTR is more for fun and show off, my bro and I love that car and my dad lets me drive it whenever I want, he even added me to the insurance when I turned 19 because I used the car almost everyday until I was able to buy my own.

Last week I noticed Scott a bit sad and he said that some kids were bullying him, our parents went to his school to talk to the principal and the problem is somewhat fixed, but he was still bummed, so I decided to surprise him yesterday by picking him up in our dad's car. I parked the car and got out to wait for him, I was sitting in the trunk when a guy approached me and said that I shouldn't sit in other people's car, I laughed it off and said that it was mine so it wasn't a problem, I must admit that I do look younger than 20 so he might've mistaken me for a high schooler and didn't believe me, he said that the car couldn't be mine and that I should go down before the owner got back, I said that it was my car again and he got mad and said ''look son, this isn't your car, get down, I'll even take a picture or two of you with it''. I was getting nervous, and when I get nervous I tend to laugh so he thought I was mocking him and yelled at me to get down that if the car belonged to me to show him proof, then he yelled that I was trying to steal the car.

I asked him to leave me alone because I was waiting for my brother and he did moved a few meters, but then I noticed that he was making a call and it tuned out that he called the police on me! My brother was getting out at the same time, he was really happy to see me there in our dad's car and ran to hug me, I tried to pick him up to get him in but the guy stopped me. I mean, I opened the door! It was obvious that the car was mine at that point.

Either way, the police came and asked the normal questions, I explained them that it was my dad's car (and the guy said JA! I knew it wasn't yours), I showed them proof; my license, my dad's papers, the insurance paper with my name on it and even a text with my dad where I said ''hey, I'm gonna pick up Scott in the car'' and he only answered with an OK, I offered to call him so they could ask him themselves but they said there was no need. The police let me leave and scolded the other guy. Before driving off the guy called me an AH because I could've just show him all of that but I preferred to be ''a dick''.

# ? May 18, 2022 10:08

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

Angrymog posted:

I think it's admirable that he's trying to pay attention to the non-autistic child, but giving how violent the autistic one can be I think the kitten or even cat would be one scratch away from having a really bad time

Even without the autistic child it's an underhanded gift by the dad. He gets to look like the good guy to his daughter for buying the kitten, meanwhile he works long hours and the stay at home mom has to do all the work of looking after the pet.

# ? May 18, 2022 10:09

Remulak: Jun 8, 2001; I can't count to four.; Yams Fan

AreWeDrunkYet posted:

Even without the autistic child it's an underhanded gift by the dad. He gets to look like the good guy to his daughter for buying the kitten, meanwhile he works long hours and the stay at home mom has to do all the work of looking after the pet.

loving hell id work long hours too. Also I�d take my daughter and the kitten to work with me, and get my wife some loving help.

# ? May 18, 2022 10:42

DreamingofRoses: Jun 27, 2013; Nap Ghost

DreamingofRoses posted:

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

AITA for posting over the top satire?

I post on the SomethingAwful forums and was compared unfavorably to the baby-eating English from Jonathan Swift's "A Modest Proposal" in a disagreement and wrote a disgusting over-the-top satirical post in response before telling the poster to go gently caress themselves. I got probated twice a week later because people apparently don't know who Jonathan Swift is or that my post was not meant to be taken seriously. AITA?

(For those of you who are actually worried these are views I hold, I don't. Also, learn about "A Modest Proposal" please.)

Actual content for another thing that has absolutely no stakes:

Do my friends hate me? IG lurking but almost never liking, commenting, etc...

quote:

I (28F) moved overseas from the States and it's been over 5 yrs since I've been away. I used to be very "popular" but now all my friends on IG purely lurk. They view every story which means they view my posts too but make almost no interaction with me. Like no engagement. I get like 7 likes.

I update my stories and stuff so people can see what I'm up to and my life here. Do my friends just not like me anymore? The watching/lurking quietly thing is really bothering me. Like why are you watching yet never message, comment, like, talk, nothing? I'm really just thinking about deleting my IG because i feel like no one cares. At all. Like they're just being nosy but don't care about me.

EDIT for clarification: Im talking about like it's been YEARS since most of my old friends have liked things. Not months, not occasionally. Years. But they watch every story.

TL;DR My friends always lurk on my IG but almost never engage or like anything. Do they just hate me? Should I give up on updating my profile?

And one that absolutely does:
33M in a relationship with a 30F. Friends are telling me to get out.

quote:

Hey Reddit, I havnt really posted before but here it goes.

I am recently divorced, living in the United States. I ended a 7 year relationship 6 months into our marriage after a combination of long distance and personal struggle from my partner blew our marriage up. It had been off again and on again for a number of years, I always idolized what our relationship could be but finally realized what it actually was. Anyway.

Enter this new relationship. We were friends before and as I was struggling to come to terms with my dissolving marriage we started to see each other and began a casual relationship. Quite quickly it became more serious, she was great. The complete opposite of my marriage, very independant, athletic, dedicated to her work and the sex was MIND BLOWING. I had a number of acquaintances who had had marriage end and their next relationship ended up being perfect and their forever partner and I thought I might be on my way there.

Things became very intense, and I felt myself getting pulled along into a more serious relationship then I wanted. I was still trying to figure out the end of my marriage and she became very defensive and often questioned if I was still talking to my ex wife, asking me when my divorce would be finalized, etc. Im not perfect, we were still talking casually and I did lie about it to her. This led to a huge blowup, fight, and her forcing me to email my ex wife and say I was already in a relationship. Things resolved, and moved forward.

I became overwhelmed, things were moving WAY too fast(like planning to move in together in March, she booked a couples photoshoot) and I broke up with her. This led to more blowups and what I found out later was her reaching out to our mutual friends and trying to get them to say that I am a bad person. I needed time to heal and figure things out. But as a few weeks moved forward, we were talking again, entering a casual relationship and seeing each other again in no time.

Over the winter our relationship continued to move at a more appropriate speed(after discussion). And I was becoming more content with moving forward with her even after everything.

Now its the spring. I wanted to get everyone together. My friend(above, that she went to after we broke up) tells me that she refuses to be in the same room as her. After some discussion she states that she respects our relationship but cannot handle the "splitting" and manipulating this person does. ie. trying to get them to turn against me after we broke up, forcing me through my divorce, etc. This is one of my closest friends and I struggled with this. Because of this I talked to the other friend involved and she states the exact same thing. Even to the point of being concerned about my safety.

She states she was worried that she would try to get pregnant just to keep me in a relationship, which at the time, I thought was weird.

And reddit I think you know where this is going.

5 weeks ago she started having a bunch of nausea. She took a pregnancy test and it was +. We had an "accident" 4 weeks prior(right around the time of the discussions actually) and she said she had taken plan B but... I dont even know

We agreed on a termination. But there were alot of hard discussions. Some weird poo poo too(ie. we were sitting in the hospital bed before the procedure and she sent me a picture of me holding a baby). But its done and over with. Now she says we will "only grow stronger" from this experience. My friends are telling me to urgently GTFO and I think are worried about my ?safety but I am really struggling with the guilt of leaving after what just happened, and maybe my friends are over reacting? I dont loving know. Im lost.

TL DR: Entered a relationship with someone right after my marriage dissolved, my friends think she is manipulative and are concerned for my safety. She may have intentionally gotten pregnant to try and keep me in the relationship.

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

# ? May 18, 2022 11:22

The Bramble: Mar 16, 2004

R/relationships: Any updates on your compulsion to pleasure yourself in quicksand?

# ? May 18, 2022 11:37

AceClown: Sep 11, 2005

DreamingofRoses posted:

33M in a relationship with a 30F. Friends are telling me to get out.

god drat if this isn't the perfect post for that dude to post the "ABOOORT" gif on

# ? May 18, 2022 12:27

unpleasantly turgid: Jul 6, 2016; u lightweights couldn't even feed my shadow ;*

Kuros posted:

Come one! Come all! Come see the amazing man without a spine!

AITA for yelling at my wife infront of my family for putting salt in my mom's birthday cake.

judging from this alone she can do so much better than him.

like his �she completely forgot about it a few hours later� part read as �this moron husband couldn�t see the gears turning if he were an inch away�. Making cake with salt to backhand an incredibly snide and rude mother in law is so loving funny

unpleasantly turgid fucked around with this message at 12:38 on May 18, 2022

# ? May 18, 2022 12:32

teen witch: Oct 9, 2012

AITA for refusing to turn around so my sister's friend could see an accident scene?

quote:

Over the weekend, I (33m) drove my sister and her friend (25f) to the beach. I don't really partake in any beachside activities, but they had been asking me to take them for a while and since they both don't drive, I figured I could sacrifice a morning/afternoon for that.

They did their thing at the beach and the early afternoon departure more or less turned into a late afternoon departure, but on the way home when I was driving, suddenly my sister looked out the passenger side window and said "holy poo poo!" I looked over to see what had gotten her attention, and there had been an accident involving a motorcyclist. He was laying flat on the ground, not moving, and an elderly man was frantically on his phone, supposedly calling 911.

My sister's friend didn't see the accident because she was on her phone, but when my sister explained the situation, she said "turn around I want to see." Immediately I shut that down with a "hell loving no; only the worst type of people gawk at accidents like that." My sister told me to chill with that and that we could take a side street from which it was still visible. Immediately I shut that suggestion down and drove them home in silence.

When we got back, my sister's friend called me a loser for having no girlfriend (???) and then she and my sister went inside. I went out to get some food, but during my meal my sister sent me nasty texts asking why it was so hard to just appease her friend.

I can't imagine I'm an rear end in a top hat here, but did I do something wrong?

# ? May 18, 2022 12:40

SirSamVimes: Jul 21, 2008; ~* Challenge *~

teen witch posted:

AITA for refusing to turn around so my sister's friend could see an accident scene?

What an absolute ghoul.

# ? May 18, 2022 12:41

Whorelord: May 1, 2013; Jump into the well...

"I don't really partake in any beachside activities" is a pretty funny phrase

# ? May 18, 2022 12:52

Malachite_Dragon: Mar 31, 2010; Weaving Merry Christmas magic

For some reason, the George Carlin Complaints & Grievances section about traffic accidents is ringing in my head now.

# ? May 18, 2022 13:30

Barudak: May 7, 2007

The last guy I mocked for not having a girlfriend married a woman with collodial silver poisoning. burned all the trees on my property down, and kicked my rear end so Im a lot more careful about it now.

# ? May 18, 2022 14:07

datajugend: Jan 15, 2010; Cat Army

Smurf tree law

# ? May 18, 2022 14:13

haveblue: Aug 15, 2005; Toilet Rascal

teen witch posted:

AITA for refusing to turn around so my sister's friend could see an accident scene?

They want to film and post it for the engagement

# ? May 18, 2022 14:18

Butter Activities: May 4, 2018

teen witch posted:

AITA for refusing to turn around so my sister's friend could see an accident scene?

He should be nicer to his sister's friend, otherwise she'll regress into pissing the bed after skinning the family cat and setting it on fire again.

# ? May 18, 2022 14:18

Butter Activities: May 4, 2018

haveblue posted:

They want to film and post it for the engagement

Ah, I didn't even think about that

# ? May 18, 2022 14:21

Pope Corky the IX: Dec 18, 2006; What are you looking at?

A few weeks ago I witnessed an Uber driver in an SUV run a red light and hit a woman on a bicycle hard enough that she was knocked out of her shoes. Conscious but in bad shape. I was on the phone with 911 standing with several others trying to block the area from traffic because it happened in a busy intersection at 4pm on a Friday. The entire time there was this loving rear end in a top hat on his phone filming the woman on the ground receiving medical treatment and kept refusing to leave, just getting in the way while acting like he was helping. He ended up having to be physically removed by the cops when they showed up.

# ? May 18, 2022 14:24

Captainsalami: Apr 16, 2010; I told you you'd pay!

Pope Corky the IX posted:

A few weeks ago I witnessed an Uber driver in an SUV run a red light and hit a woman on a bicycle hard enough that she was knocked out of her shoes. Conscious but in bad shape. I was on the phone with 911 standing with several others trying to block the area from traffic because it happened in a busy intersection at 4pm on a Friday. The entire time there was this loving rear end in a top hat on his phone filming the woman on the ground receiving medical treatment and kept refusing to leave, just getting in the way while acting like he was helping. He ended up having to be physically removed by the cops when they showed up.

How much yelling did he do while being dragged off?

# ? May 18, 2022 15:03

Pope Corky the IX: Dec 18, 2006; What are you looking at?

Not much actual yelling, more whiny protestations of how he was just helping and why does he have to move when those people (me and others giving statements) get to watch?

# ? May 18, 2022 15:08

B-Rock452: Jan 6, 2005

I once gave CPR to someone who collapsed at a grocery store and after EMS arrived and took over someone started yelling at me for not moving the guy since we were blocking the lottery vending machine.

# ? May 18, 2022 15:20

therobit: Aug 19, 2008; I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time

Pope Corky the IX posted:

A few weeks ago I witnessed an Uber driver in an SUV run a red light and hit a woman on a bicycle hard enough that she was knocked out of her shoes. Conscious but in bad shape. I was on the phone with 911 standing with several others trying to block the area from traffic because it happened in a busy intersection at 4pm on a Friday. The entire time there was this loving rear end in a top hat on his phone filming the woman on the ground receiving medical treatment and kept refusing to leave, just getting in the way while acting like he was helping. He ended up having to be physically removed by the cops when they showed up.

Oh man, that sounds terrible. And anyone who has read the OSHA thread knows that lost shoes=dead.

# ? May 18, 2022 16:00

Brawnfire: Jul 13, 2004; 🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

Pope Corky the IX posted:

Not much actual yelling, more whiny protestations of how he was just helping and why does he have to move when those people (me and others giving statements) get to watch?

You should be thanking me!!! If I weren't livestreaming, it would be like this never happened! I've put this bicyclist on main! ON MAIN!!!

# ? May 18, 2022 16:35

Doc Hawkins: Jun 15, 2010; Dashing? But I'm not even moving!

Brawnfire posted:

You should be thanking me!!! If I weren't livestreaming, it would be like this never happened! I've put this bicyclist on main! ON MAIN!!!

i can hear jason alexander shouting this

# ? May 18, 2022 16:40

Captain Hygiene: Sep 17, 2007; You mess with the crabbo...

AITA for telling my MIL about my "Energy Diet" and saying it's the reason why I don't come to her weekly family dinners anymore?

quote:

So my f33 MIL has a tradition, and that's hosting weekly family dinners at her house where everyone visits. In every dinner she hosts she'd find a way to comment about my hair, body, job, age, and worst of all my infertility. It upsets me, makes me feel uncomfortable and puts me on the spot. MIL says she's just looking out for me and my husband thinks I'm being too sensitive.

During "my" last dinner there, MIL commented on my infertility by telling me to hurry up and get pregnant soon because "I'm not getting any younger". After that I no longer felt comfortable going over there and be part of her weekly family dinners. My husband threw a fit but eventually started going alone.

This went on for 2 weeks. Now after missing the 3rd family dinner I got a call from MIL sounding as nice as she could asking me about my health and stuff. I kept it short and civil. But she asked if I was going to show up for next week's family dinner. I said no..she was like "why are you still sick?" (I found out my husband lied about me beingsick as excuse for my absense, that is another story for later) I said "no??", I'm actually on a diet" she laughed and said thatI indeed need to lose "a few pounds" and said thar she'd see if she'd make me some "healthy side dishes" just to get me to come but I said "oh no, I'm actually on an energy diet, this means that if there's anything that bothers me, makes me uncomfortable, puts me on the spot then I don't want it and don't want to waste my energy on it". she got offended and said that I was being rude to her for no good reason. I cut the call short few minutes in.

My husband got home later and started yelling at me for I said to his mother. I told him I don't want to go there anymore when his mom keeps making digs at me for her own amusement. He again said that I was being too sensitive but added that I was embarrassing him infront of his whole family and said that by deciding to no longer show up, I'm basically telling his family "gently caress Y'all" to all of their faces. We argued about it for half an hour then he took my phone and tried to get me to call her to "unfuck" what I just "hosed" and take back what I said but I took the phone back and turned it off. He got more livid and said that I have one day to make this right and start showing his family some respect.

AITA? I just wanted to tell her why but in a nice way.

lovely spineless husband is hopefully also about to learn a harsh truth about the Energy Diet

# ? May 18, 2022 17:03

Arsenic Lupin: Apr 12, 2012; This particularly rapid💨 unintelligible 😖patter💁 isn't generally heard🧏‍♂️, and if it is🤔, it doesn't matter💁.

AITA for describing my MIL's birthday cake as "kinda gay"

quote:

I don't even know where to begin. So I'm 27 F married to 28 F (yeah we're lesbians). We've known each other for seven years and have been married for 4. We were each other's first kiss, first love, first everything. I will call my lovely wife Emma from here on out for clarity.

My MIL has always been vocal about her dislike for me and the fact that Emma married a woman. She was initially supportive when Emma came out, but I think she was hoping Emma would suddenly turn straight and decide to marry a man, reverting back to the "God-fearing housewife" state. When Emma and I first started dating, she would make subtle digs about how I wasn't good enough for Emma, but the neighbor's kid Brandon sure was. When MIL realized we were getting serious, she tried to sabotage our relationship by accusing me of cheating, being after their inheritance (??), being a psychopath because I have chronic social anxiety, and other completely outrageous things. We were pretty fed up with her at that point and since we both had jobs set up for us, Emma and I moved in together in a city about a hundred miles away from MIL. Since we got a lot closer during that time, I guess I have MIL to thank for accelerating my relationship with my love. MIL wasn't invited to our wedding because she threatened to make a scene and bring her own groom for Emma (I highly doubt she would have but we didn't want to chance ruining our day).

So here's the current situation, and where I may be TA:

Emma and I went to MIL's birthday party yesterday (we only visit her once a year for Emma's sake). We brought her some nice crystal wine glasses as a present, she was making snide comments about our relationship, everything was going as expected. MIL's boyfriend brought out her cake, which was a chocolate cake covered in pastel rainbow flowers. I commented to Emma (perhaps a bit too loudly), "Rainbow cake is lookin kinda gay, maybe she's finally coming around" and MIL absolutely blew up. She was screaming at us that it was disgraceful that I said she was gay, and that we even wore our wedding rings to her party when we knew that she didn't like to see them. She was yelling at Emma that she shouldn't have brought me, because I'm a disgusting reminder that Emma isn't right in the head. Emma was fuming and close to tears so we left immediately after.

Emma said she doesn't blame me at all and no longer wants contact with her mother. Emma's cousins, grandparents, and uncle are blowing our phones saying that what I said was wrong and disrespectful, and that we are horrible people, especially since MIL has high blood pressure issues and I was just trying to aggravate her. I was trying to aggravate her, and I don't feel bad that I did, but I feel awful that I made MIL say those horrible things to my wife, and that Emma is currently no-contact with her mother, who she was quite close to before we were married.

Edit: In case anyone wants to know what the cake looked like, I unfortunately did not get a photo. I did however find some similar looking floral cakes from this company, but MIL's had pastel rainbow flowers on the top and pastel stripes on the sides.

https://whiteflowercake.com/classic

Edit 2: I am so sorry, I'm really worn out and I think I'm just going to go to bed. I apologize if I didn't reply to your comment yet, I've read all of them and I'll try to respond in the morning. I didn't expect so many comments so soon.

quote:

Edit 3: I don't know how to make an update, so I'll just post another edit here. I woke up to an overwhelming amount of replies. I didn't think this many people would see the post. I'm sorry that I couldn't reply to everyone.

My wife has decided to go permanently no contact with MIL, and low contact with much of her extended family. The only family member who has been supportive of us so far is her older sister (she's truly a lovely person, I don't know how SIL and my wife are such kind people despite being raised by MIL).

I understand I was wrong for making the gay cake comment, and that it only served to enrage my MIL, but my wife and I were talking yesterday, and she said she would have commented that the cake looked gay even if I hadn't (though it definitely would have gone over better had my wife said it instead of me). We're ultimately happy with the outcome, and that we no longer have to attend any incredibly toxic family events with MIL. As a side note, my wife has told me that she never felt terribly close to her mother (so my comment about them being close before our marriage was incorrect), but that the hour long calls she would have with her mother were just very one-sided conversations where her mother would rant about her day and our relationship, never asking or caring about my wife.

Wifey and I have ordered our own gay cake from a lovely local bakery (that is also run by lesbians) as a treat for the abuse we've had to endure over the years, and as a toast for better (MIL free) years to come.

Thank you to everyone who commented and gave their insights. I'm glad this was resolved so quickly. Yesterday I was feeling awful about my own behavior during the party, especially since so many extended family members we coming forward to argue on MIL's behalf. I was sad that this event caused my wife to go no contact with her mother. Ultimately, I see that it was largely MIL's fault and that my wife's extended family are a bunch of sheep. Thank you again everyone!

# ? May 18, 2022 17:04

Absurd Alhazred: Mar 27, 2010; by Athanatos

Captain Hygiene posted:

AITA for telling my MIL about my "Energy Diet" and saying it's the reason why I don't come to her weekly family dinners anymore?

lovely spineless husband is hopefully also about to learn a harsh truth about the Energy Diet

Arsenic Lupin posted:

AITA for describing my MIL's birthday cake as "kinda gay"

# ? May 18, 2022 17:13

CharlestheHammer: Jun 26, 2011; YOU SAY MY POSTS ARE THE RAVINGS OF THE DUMBEST PERSON ON GOD'S GREEN EARTH BUT YOU YOURSELF ARE READING THEM. CURIOUS!

If that kind of lame retort can spike her blood pressure then she�s doomed either way

# ? May 18, 2022 17:14

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 14, 2024 00:23

Absurd Alhazred: Mar 27, 2010; by Athanatos

CharlestheHammer posted:

If that kind of lame retort can spike her blood pressure then she�s doomed either way

Literally gonna die mad about it.

# ? May 18, 2022 17:15

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

«‹›3575 »