r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

quantumwell: Jun 22, 2013

Soylent Pudding posted:

AITA for yelling at my mom's husband in public?

That was a good one, too bad I can't find the comments thread. I assume the OP is male since people are pissing
off his stepcreature by mentioning how much he looks like real Dad.

# ? Jun 15, 2022 00:00

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# ? May 30, 2024 13:14

Batterypowered7: Aug 8, 2009; The mist that chills you keeps me warm.

Soylent Pudding posted:

AITA for yelling at my mom's husband in public?

Wanna give this kid a high-five.

# ? Jun 15, 2022 00:03

ponzicar: Mar 17, 2008

DemoneeHo posted:

Help! My Niece Loves Showing Off Her New Boobs. I Need Her to Stay Away From My Husband.

A "sex addicted" 60 year old man sounds like both an embarrassment and a nightmare, but the lack of information about his behavior is suspiciously absent.

# ? Jun 15, 2022 00:44

Breetai: Nov 6, 2005; 🥄Mah spoon is too big!🍌

ponzicar posted:

A "sex addicted" 60 year old man sounds like both an embarrassment and a nightmare, but the lack of information about his behavior is suspiciously absent.

He's either literally the big bad wolf from Red Hot Riding Hood, or else he watched a porn once and she found out. No middle ground.

# ? Jun 15, 2022 00:52

Uncle Enzo: Apr 28, 2008; I always wanted to be a Wizard

Breetai posted:

He's either literally the big bad wolf from Red Hot Riding Hood, or else he watched a porn once and she found out. No middle ground.

There is the distant, sad chance that he has a naked lady fetish.

# ? Jun 15, 2022 00:56

BrigadierSensible: Feb 16, 2012; I've got a pocket full of cheese🧀, and a garden full of trees🌴.

Andrast posted:

Who the gently caress are these relatives that are apparently fine with coming to hang out with a total stranger to them anyway

A while back. But it is a very Indian thing, (and I have subsequently found out that this is true in other cultures too), that if you have "relatives" that live within an hour of wherever you are going to visit, instead of paying for a hotel, you will stay with them.

Of course, in my and everyone I know's experience, before you do this you ring up and say "Hi BrigadierSensible, I am your cousin's wife's brother. We will be visiting X city next month for a week, and you live in Y city about 45 minutes away. Would it be OK if we came and stayed with you?" And depending on the closeness of the relative, (in my example it's not very close), you can get out of it with a polite excuse. i.e. "I'm sorry, but I will be very busy with work that week." etc. And generally the person doing the asking will understand. Of course all this depends on the politeness/seriousness of the excuse and the closeness of the relative.

In the case of the OP's story, the excuse of "I'm sorry, but I will be out of town for most of your trip, and my wife who doesn't know you that well isn't comfortable with having to host people she doesn't know." is perfectly reasonable, and only arseholes would be offended.

The bigger issue is that the husband repeatedly springs these kinds of things on her, (visitors, work trips), without telling when he has known for months. He also knows she doesn't like being told at the last minute. So either he is really that clueless/absent minded that he always forgets, (in which case he needs to do some work to try to remember to tell his wife). Or he is a passive aggressive coward so scared of confrontation that he will only bring it up when he can immediately run away and not deal with the fall out. Or he is a selfish prick who cares not for his wife's feelings at all, and just expects her to deal with his poo poo.

Good on her for taking a stand, and pissing off to a hotel to be comfortable. Coz the husband will be the one who cops the flack for being a bad host, (considering she doesn't know these people), and it will either get him to buck his ideas up, or at least gain a reputation as a bad house to stay at, thus lessening the stream of unknown relatives coming to stay.

# ? Jun 15, 2022 01:11

the holy poopacy: May 16, 2009; hey! check this out; Fun Shoe

Uncle Enzo posted:

There is the distant, sad chance that he has a naked lady fetish.

gtfo with that poo poo, the deviantart thread is thataway for sickos like you

# ? Jun 15, 2022 01:17

Dazerbeams: Jul 8, 2009

DemoneeHo posted:

Help! My Niece Loves Showing Off Her New Boobs. I Need Her to Stay Away From My Husband.

Shouldn't it be more concerning that the husband might potentially show any sort of interest to a close relative of his? Boobs scary, yes, but this is his niece he's potentially oggling. If your man has no qualms about incest, you should be making for the door.

# ? Jun 15, 2022 01:34

WoodrowSkillson: Feb 24, 2005; *Gestures at 60 years of Lions history*

Uncle Enzo posted:

There is the distant, sad chance that he has a naked lady fetish.

hell, same

# ? Jun 15, 2022 01:54

Evil Willow: Apr 26, 2007; Bored now...

AITA For telling my husband I'm not ready for his family to meet our new son

quote:

My husband (33M) and I (32F) just welcomed our second child 2-months ago. We also have a 3-year old daughter. This pregnancy was a lot more difficult for me than my first. I had complications and had to take an early maternity leave from work because my doctor recommended bedrest. Thankfully, everything with the delivery went fine and our son is healthy and happy.

In order to help while I was on bed rest, my mom came to stay with us. She came when I was about 8-months pregnant, right when I went on bedrest. She also stayed after the birth and just recently moved back home a week or so ago. It was so helpful having her here and I am forever grateful for it. However, my husband could not have been happier to see her leave.

He expressed to me numerous times that he feels my mom is overbearing and that she inserts herself into every situation under the guise of "helping." He says he felt marginalized in both his roles as husband and father the entire time she was here. I will admit that my mom can be very protective and almost over-caring, if that makes sense. She has a strong motherly instinct and I can kind of see how it would rub my husband the wrong way. I was not in a position to fight either one of them on anything, so I told my husband he's just going to have to deal with it and that it's short term. He was so happy to see her leave I'm surprised he didn't throw himself a little party.

Now that my mom is gone, he wants his parents to come visit. They live far enough away that they would have to fly here. I told my husband that I am not ready for visitors and that now that I am more recovered, I want to spend time with just my family and bond.

Instead of being supportive of my needs, he took offense and pretty much threw it in my face that I was ok with my mom being here for 3-months and now I won't even let his family meet their grandchild. He accused me of having double-standards and even asked if I hate his parents, which I absolutely do not. I just want some time with my nuclear family before having anyone else come visit.

My husband argued that his parents would be getting a hotel anyway so it's not like they would be staying with us. He just wants them to meet his new son. I told him that I am not forbidding his family from ever meeting our son, but that now is not a good time. He asked when a good time would be and I told him that I will tell him when I'm ready for them to come.

He told me that he's tired of living his life based completely on my timelines and needs. He said that at some point, what he wants should at least matter a little bit instead of me constantly dictating the terms of our life. I told him that when he experiences a difficult pregnancy and birth, then he can dictate things, but until then, my needs matter more than his wants.

He's now barely speaking to me. He will do things I ask and help with whatever I need, but it's like he's on autopilot and sulking because he can't get what he wants.

# ? Jun 15, 2022 01:55

Blue Moonlight: Apr 28, 2005; Bitter and Sarcastic

DemoneeHo posted:

Help! My Niece Loves Showing Off Her New Boobs. I Need Her to Stay Away From My Husband.

quote:
We were at my husband�s 60th birthday dinner last night�

�

I think the solution is to leave your husband at home for family events.

�Sorry dear, you can�t come to your party. You know why.�

Blue Moonlight fucked around with this message at 02:00 on Jun 15, 2022

# ? Jun 15, 2022 01:57

blackmet: Aug 5, 2006; I believe there is a universal Truth to the process of doing things right (Not that I have any idea what that actually means).

DemoneeHo posted:

Help! My Niece Loves Showing Off Her New Boobs. I Need Her to Stay Away From My Husband.

How old is the niece? Does he even notice? If he notices, does he care? Did his wife go nuts on him and diagnose him as a sex addict because he wanted to do unspeakable things to her like touch her boobs or have her get on top? Or was he having unprotected sex multiple times a day with sex workers he paid in used heroin syringes? Does the niece flirt with him?

This whole script just has plot holes the size of Texas. Need more information!

# ? Jun 15, 2022 02:03

Remulak: Jun 8, 2001; I can't count to four.; Yams Fan

Absurd Alhazred posted:

I know exactly how I feel about this one, fortunately:

AITA for not giving my sister my son's old toys?

Does her sister think she's going to be able to resell them or something? I thought the craze was a one-time thing.

GIVE ME YOUR BABIES!

Naw, sister promised them to her kid and is now facing the horror of not being able to give away other people's things.

# ? Jun 15, 2022 02:18

quantumwell: Jun 22, 2013

Evil Willow posted:

AITA For telling my husband I'm not ready for his family to meet our new son

OP is getting her rear end reamed in the comments.

# ? Jun 15, 2022 02:44

Solenna: Jun 5, 2003; I'd say it was your manifest destiny not to.

quantumwell posted:

OP is getting her rear end reamed in the comments.

I would love to see how the husband describes her mom, because holy poo poo does this need some elaboration.

quote:

He says he felt marginalized in both his roles as husband and father the entire time she was here. I will admit that my mom can be very protective and almost over-caring, if that makes sense. She has a strong motherly instinct and I can kind of see how it would rub my husband the wrong way.

# ? Jun 15, 2022 02:49

pentyne: Nov 7, 2012

the comments are a galaxy sized oof

commentor posted:

I bet if your mother asked to come back, you�d be ok with that

OP posted:

Probably not. My husband would probably leave and never come back lol.

# ? Jun 15, 2022 02:53

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

Evil Willow posted:

AITA For telling my husband I'm not ready for his family to meet our new son

quote:

I just want some time with my nuclear family before having anyone else come visit.

This apparently includes her mother, but not his mother. And she's wondering how this isn't going over well.

# ? Jun 15, 2022 03:15

Foo Diddley: Oct 29, 2011; cat

AITA for wanting my bestie's partner to explain why I'm making him uncomfortable to my face?

quote:

I want to preface by saying that my sense of humor is quite...boyish, I guess. I have an older brother, I used to take taekwondo lessons so I have a lot of male friends and their sense of humor just kind of rubbed off on me. I do like a good dirty joke and sexual innuendos here & there. It's important for explaining my side of story. My bestie found herself a boyfriend. She introduced us to each other, he's a nice guy and we hit it off immediately. I want to have a good relationship with my besties partners & I make sure to do so by joking around with them in a way I know best - memes. I have noticed that my bestie's boy isn't reciprocating but I haven't thought much about it, until it was brought up by my bestie. She sat my down and asked me to tone it down with sexual jokes/memes, as it's making her and her boyfriend uncomfortable. You see, I know men, I'm hanging out around them my whole life and I know they appreciate a good dirty joke as much as I do. I also know my bestie - this is her first boyfriend for a long time, she has some insecurities, so it was kind of obvious for me that my jokes/memes were making HER uncomfortable. So I told her that I prefer to hear it from her boyfriend, if I really make him so uncomfortable by sending him a meme about handj*bs from time to time and he's more than welcome to meet me and tell this to my face. She told me that I'm unreasonable, because he's not my friend and he's not required to say anything to my face if he's uncomfortable with doing so and I'm an rear end in a top hat for even suggesting it & not accepting "their" boundaries.

As I've said before, I don't think those are "their" boundaries, that's why I suggested to have a talk with her boyfriend, but I'm wondering if I really might be an rear end in a top hat by asking for an explanation from him? Is it really so uncalled for & unheard of?

Edit: Because it caused confusion - her boyfriend enjoyed my jokes when we were introduced to each other. The reason why I suggested an explanation is because he suddenly went radio silent when communicating online, which makes me believe that it's not him who is uncomfortable, but my friend.

joking around in the way i know best - memes (that make everyone around me uncomfortable)

# ? Jun 15, 2022 03:45

Captain Hygiene: Sep 17, 2007; You mess with the crabbo...

I Have No Bounds, and I Must Meme

# ? Jun 15, 2022 03:53

Coca Koala: Nov 28, 2005; ongoing nowhere; College Slice

Just sending my bestie�s boyfriends memes about handjobs, as all men do.

# ? Jun 15, 2022 04:01

Foo Diddley: Oct 29, 2011; cat

believe me, i know men, and when they laugh awkwardly at first and then stop communicating with you entirely, that's how you know your handjob jokes all landed

# ? Jun 15, 2022 04:08

Coca Koala: Nov 28, 2005; ongoing nowhere; College Slice

�For you it�s a handjob but for me it�s a handavocation� I hit send and let out a deep breath, imagining the deep belly laughs and chortles my best friend�s boyfriend is assuredly letting out, despite the fact that his girlfriend feels deeply uncomfortable.

# ? Jun 15, 2022 04:13

deety: Aug 2, 2004; zombies + sharks = fun

This chick seems really hung up on whether the guy hates her jokes, but I don't get why that matters here? If your best friend wants you to stop DMing her boyfriend handjob memes, then you stop DMing her boyfriend handjob memes.

# ? Jun 15, 2022 04:59

Absurd Alhazred: Mar 27, 2010; by Athanatos

deety posted:

This chick seems really hung up on whether the guy hates her jokes, but I don't get why that matters here? If your best friend wants you to stop DMing her boyfriend handjob memes, then you stop DMing her boyfriend handjob memes.

She spent so much time training with meathead guys that she

# ? Jun 15, 2022 05:03

therobit: Aug 19, 2008; I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time

deety posted:

This chick seems really hung up on whether the guy hates her jokes, but I don't get why that matters here? If your best friend wants you to stop DMing her boyfriend handjob memes, then you stop DMing her boyfriend handjob memes.

No but you are she has no filter it�s not her fault.

# ? Jun 15, 2022 05:09

Hughlander: May 11, 2005

quantumwell posted:

OP is getting her rear end reamed in the comments.

Know who else is getting reamed in the comments about giving birth and her mom being around?

AITA For picking my mom to be in the delivery room while I give birth and not my husband

quote:

I am currently 8 1/2 months pregnant with my first child. It has not been an easy pregnancy and I have been on bedrest for the past month. Since we live in the US and our insurance is crap, I had to take a leave of absence from work without pay. My husband has had to take on extra time at work to compensate for my lost income, so he's barely home and when he is he's exhausted. My mom has been staying with us since I went on bedrest because I need so much help with pretty much everything. She was an ER nurse before she retired and has been a godsend. I know we couldn't have made it work without her help.

The hospital I am giving birth at is still using Covid restrictions for the delivery room. We are only allowed one other person besides me. Because my mom has been with me for the past month, taking me to the doctor, taking care of all my needs, etc. I am feeling much more comfortable and at ease with her. I decided that I want her to be in the delivery room with me because she's been so much more present for everything than my husband has.

I told my husband about my decision over this past weekend and he did not take it well. He claimed I am denying him a once-in-a-lifetime experience and I am putting my mother over him. I told him it has nothing to do with me placing my mom over him and this is solely about my comfort. He tried to argue with me about it but I told him I do not have the energy to debate him on this and that my decision is final.

He's been really sulky ever since and is hardly speaking to me when he's home. He's even been sleeping on the couch but is using the excuse that it's easier for me to get better sleep if he's not in bed with me. Which I know is BS and he's just mad.

He got home late again last night and I confronted him about how he's acting and asked him to sleep in the bed with me. He told me he was exhausted from working another 14-hour shift and he just wants to be left alone. I told him he's acting like a baby about this and he needs to realize that his feelings aren't the most important thing here.

He said that I'm already denying him a huge life experience and that I "don't get to tell him how he f*$^ing feels about it." I told him to grow up and that just because my mom is going to be in the room with me doesn't make him any less of a father or husband and that he'll still get the chance to meet our child as soon as it's allowed.

I told him that he hasn't been with me to doctor visits or birth classes and that my mom has. He said that it's not his fault that he has to work so much and that someone needs to pay for all the baby's needs. I said that he is being unfair to use work as an excuse because he could easily take time off for the doctor or classes if he really wanted too.

He refused to sleep in the bed with me again and I fell asleep crying. I know it would mean a lot to him to be in the delivery room, but he hasn't been to the classes or doctor with me like my mom has.

# ? Jun 15, 2022 05:20

Dazerbeams: Jul 8, 2009

Some people would rather be right than have any friends. My bestie no longer speaks to me but at least I know men.

# ? Jun 15, 2022 05:45

house of the dad: Jul 4, 2005

Hughlander posted:

Know who else is getting reamed in the comments about giving birth and her mom being around?

AITA For picking my mom to be in the delivery room while I give birth and not my husband

Better luck with your next husband, lady

# ? Jun 15, 2022 06:02

NO FUCK YOU DAD: Oct 23, 2008

DemoneeHo posted:

Help! My Niece Loves Showing Off Her New Boobs. I Need Her to Stay Away From My Husband.
Her mother used to be the same way but has finally curbed it somewhat due to her older age

This line is extremely telling. Unless the husband is so sex addicted he's tried to shtup own sister, neice is from OP's side of the family and the daughter of OP's sister who she also thinks is a horrible slut because she dresse(s/d) inappropriately.

OP has jealousy issues with her sister that she's now projecting onto her niece. Either sex addict husband once made a move on the sister which OP blamed on her sister's slutty ways, or OP is mad that her niece took over her sister's role as "the hot one" just as her sister aged out of the role.

# ? Jun 15, 2022 06:24

BrigadierSensible: Feb 16, 2012; I've got a pocket full of cheese🧀, and a garden full of trees🌴.

Also you will notice that the 60+ year old husband has no agency in this story. He is a filthy dirty sex addict, shamed by his wife and therefore a lesser man. Yet he is also the hapless victim of the slutty dressing niece with her fake boobs, from whom he needs to be protected.

# ? Jun 15, 2022 06:41

Tobermory: Mar 31, 2011

BrigadierSensible posted:

Also you will notice that the 60+ year old husband has no agency in this story. He is a filthy dirty sex addict, shamed by his wife and therefore a lesser man. Yet he is also the hapless victim of the slutty dressing niece with her fake boobs, from whom he needs to be protected.

1. He admitted the he was powerless over his addictive sexual behavior.
2. He came to believe that a Power greater than himself could restore him to sanity.
3. He made a decision to turn his will and his life over to the care of his Wife.

# ? Jun 15, 2022 06:47

therobit: Aug 19, 2008; I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time

There are 3 types of men that are described as �sex addicts.�

The first and most common is a conservative Christian man who got caught looking at porn while at work or by his wife.

The second and less common is a man that constantly cheats but talks a really good game and convinces his wife he�s an addict so she doesn�t leave him.

The third is Bill Clinton.

# ? Jun 15, 2022 06:47

Plucky Brit: Nov 7, 2009; Swing low, sweet chariot

Hughlander posted:

AITA For picking my mom to be in the delivery room while I give birth and not my husband

Man, that husband is on a hiding to nothing. Either he cuts back on hours, or he keeps up the gruelling work schedule and the wife gets annoyed that he's not present at the medical check-ups (that wouldn't be affordable without the husband's work).

# ? Jun 15, 2022 06:52

Beachcomber: May 21, 2007; Another day in paradise.; Slippery Tilde

Hughlander posted:

Know who else is getting reamed in the comments about giving birth and her mom being around?

AITA For picking my mom to be in the delivery room while I give birth and not my husband

I mean, her mom is pretty much TA too for even considering this. Maybe that's where she gets it from.

# ? Jun 15, 2022 07:09

incoherent: Apr 24, 2004; 01010100011010000111001
00110100101101100011011
000110010101110010

I wanna know where all these millennials are getting boomer parents to come take care of the post-birthing needs. And all of them married the same type of dude? (Stepping up working more to pay for the family?)

# ? Jun 15, 2022 07:36

Hughlander: May 11, 2005

AITA for telling my daughter she has to find somewhere else to live?

quote:

My older daughter moved back from her college dorm at the end of the semester. She has a 16 year old younger sister. They have always had a strained relationship, and I admit I have done a poor job of mediating their conflicts.

After �Alice� left to go to school, I noticed how quickly the atmosphere in our home changed. The air felt lighter. My younger daughter, �Daisy,� was happier and more relaxed. She began smiling more. After a while, I began to realize how much of the tension in our house was due to Alice�s tendency to generate conflict and arguments out of thin air. I love both of my children, but I cannot pretend that they are both nice people. Alice can be sweet and generous at times, but she also seems to enjoy antagonizing people, and her little sister is her most frequent target.

After several weeks with Alice back at home, the lightness and peace of our home is gone. She is antagonizing Daisy on a near-daily basis. Just a few examples: Daisy had several weeks worth of a show recorded on the DVR that she hadn�t watched yet. Alice deleted them because she wanted to �clear some space.� I bought some of Daisy�s favorite cookies. Alice asked Daisy if she could have some of them, and Daisy said yes. Over the course of one day, Alice ate all but one cookie, then she put the practically empty package back in the cabinet and acted as if she had no idea why Daisy was upset.

The last straw was just a few days ago. Daisy had washed a load of her laundry, and didn�t have a chance to put it in the dryer before she went to work. Alice took the wet clothes out of the washing machine so she could do a load of her own. But when she took Daisy�s clothes out, she didn�t put them in the dryer. She dropped them into a basket. When Daisy got back, she found the basket with her wet clothes pushed to the corner of the room. She went ballistic and started screaming. Alice responded with a condescending tone of voice, telling Daisy to �calm down� and �stop overreacting.� Which, of course, made Daisy even angrier.

I tried to get Alice to understand that she was in the wrong, but she refused to acknowledge she did anything wrong. After a lot of back-and-forth, she said, �Hey, life�s not fair sometimes, and the sooner she realizes that, the happier she�ll be.�

I said, �If you really think you know what life is, it�s time for you to get out there and live it. You need to find your own place to stay.�

My ex and my parents say I am overreacting, and that I can�t put my child on the street. I say Alice is an adult, and if she cannot treat her sister and me with basic courtesy and respect, she needs to get her own place to live until school starts and she can move back into her dorm. None of them have offered to take her in, but they expect me to continue to tolerate her disruptive behavior for the rest of the summer.

Wonder why that last bit...

# ? Jun 15, 2022 08:10

Evil Willow: Apr 26, 2007; Bored now...

AITA For telling a coworker to stop bringing cakes to the office?

quote:

I have a coworker who's a hobby baker and often brings their finished products into the office to share with everyone.

This would be perfectly fine once in a while, but it's nearly every day, and was getting a bit excessive. I don't want to be tempted by sweets every day and it is unhealthy and upsetting to see my coworkers being led into unhealthy lifestyles by the sheer convenience of the sweets. They surely wouldn't be eating as many cakes etc. if they weren't brought in each day.

I was certain (and honestly still am) that others feel the same way but did not have the willpower to speak up about it.

So last week I mentioned to my coworker that it was nice they wanted to share with us but perhaps they should just choose their best creation once a week and bring that in rather than bombarding us with sugar and fat every day, since it will take a toll on peoples' health in the long term.

She assumed I was speaking on behalf of my coworkers (in a way I was, which is where I might've F'd up) and stopped bringing in sweets. But later a few asked her why she'd stopped baking and now my coworkers are upset with me that I asked her to stop bringing things in.

They said if I didn't want to have her snacks that was my prerogative but that it was uncalled for for me to speak on behalf of everybody or to tell our baking coworker what to do/suggest she has having a negative impact by sharing. (Apparently her feelings were hurt for whatever reason--though I hadn't said anything personal. I still feel bad about it though as it was not the intention.)

I feel I was just speaking my mind and looking out for everyone's best interests. But I like and respect my coworkers for the most part, so I'm worried they have a point about how I went about what I did even if my intention was right.

So, AITA for telling my coworker she should not brings cakes in every day? Or was I just the only one who would speak up for everyone's best interests?