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MEIN RAVEN
Oct 7, 2008

Gutentag Mein Raven

Bad Purchase posted:

he loves chili, and the look on his face when he’s eating it but no longer remembers he loves it will be the final restitution the sandy hook families need

I love this sudden image in my head of a sad, red-bodied Alex Jones stuffing himself with Wolff Brand chili while listening to Johnny Cash's cover of Hurt on repeat. That's a deserved punishment indeed.

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Mr. Fall Down Terror
Jan 24, 2018

by Fluffdaddy

Sophy Wackles posted:

Wondering what assets they can seize from him. Like, can they just take his personal assets or can they hopefully take info wars, supplement companies and whatever else?

jones himself is on the hook along with the business entities InfoWars and Free Speech Systems, some of his other shell businesses were dropped from the suit after jones declared they were bankrupt

its not clear how much value any of those entities has but this is the point where we're going to find out

oh and after jones and his business goes through all this poo poo, he has to do it all over again in Connecticut

Robo Reagan
Feb 12, 2012

by Fluffdaddy
man every judge move or show ive seen rambling like a jackass leading up to nothing gets a sassy judge to shake their head and the baliff makes a quip this is just stream of consciousness nonsense

funeral home DJ
Apr 21, 2003


Pillbug
Jones will be found brain dead tonight in front of an empty kiddie pool that has traces of chili left in it. Conspiracies will proliferate for decades whether it was an act of self harm, or if he was silenced for telling the truth.

Fentry
Mar 7, 2003



Apparently Jones is live now on his show ranting about this all being a show trial concurrent to him getting wrecked in reality

Robo Reagan
Feb 12, 2012

by Fluffdaddy

Fentry posted:

Apparently Jones is live now on his show ranting about this all being a show trial concurrent to him getting wrecked in reality

https://twitter.com/dril/status/134787490526658561?s=20&t=jMvYk_Mu4ol0L7TwhQ3pIw

drat this trials letting me drag out all the golden oldies

Piell
Sep 3, 2006

Grey Worm's Ken doll-like groin throbbed with the anticipatory pleasure that only a slightly warm and moist piece of lemoncake could offer


Young Orc
Oh poo poo, the jury gets to ask questions?

PhazonLink
Jul 17, 2010
what kind of chili does Jones like , does it have beans or no beans?

teen witch
Oct 9, 2012
Return back half past yall

Mr. Fall Down Terror
Jan 24, 2018

by Fluffdaddy

Piell posted:

Oh poo poo, the jury gets to ask questions?

yeah, this isn't a criminal trial so the procedures are a little looser. in a civil trial jurors can question witnesses

Shishkahuben
Mar 5, 2009





Bad Purchase posted:

the only fair sentence is to order jones to consume so much chili he suffers total amnesia, forgetting everything and everyone he’s ever loved

and let him off scot free?!

PhazonLink posted:

what kind of chili does Jones like , does it have beans or no beans?

cincinnati chili, and all that implies

Digital Jedi
May 28, 2007

Fallen Rib
Apparently Jones went on the air during the break

Also https://twitter.com/BasketHerder/status/1552025054778630144?t=rLfohsRrZs4z5qNdIt9JPQ&s=19

Piell
Sep 3, 2006

Grey Worm's Ken doll-like groin throbbed with the anticipatory pleasure that only a slightly warm and moist piece of lemoncake could offer


Young Orc
GUM CHEWER

Froghammer
Sep 8, 2012

Khajit has wares
if you have coin
omfg the judge had to tell Jones' lawyer to stop chewing gum

Confusedslight
Jan 9, 2020
"Are you seriously chewing gum right now?"
lol

steinrokkan
Apr 2, 2011



Soiled Meat

Confusedslight posted:

"Are you seriously chewing gum right now?"
lol

This trial is Tim Heidecker's best work yet

MEIN RAVEN
Oct 7, 2008

Gutentag Mein Raven

ITT we are Alex Jones, lovin up on a big ol bowl of chili

Tree Dude
May 26, 2012

AND MY SONG IS...
It's Daria time

Piell
Sep 3, 2006

Grey Worm's Ken doll-like groin throbbed with the anticipatory pleasure that only a slightly warm and moist piece of lemoncake could offer


Young Orc
Those were some pretty bad questions from the jury

BigglesSWE
Dec 2, 2014

How 'bout them hawks news huh!
Who is Daria?


lol "can you tell me where you grew up?"

".............ummmmm."

That's a good sign.

Grand Fromage
Jan 30, 2006

L-l-look at you bar-bartender, a-a pa-pathetic creature of meat and bone, un-underestimating my l-l-liver's ability to metab-meTABolize t-toxins. How can you p-poison a perfect, immortal alcohOLIC?


BigglesSWE posted:

Who is Daria?

An InfoWars corporate person who seems to be a complete psycho given her deposition. Also possibly Alex's handler (Alex has previously said on air he's been in contact with Russian intelligence).

sure okay
Apr 7, 2006





BigglesSWE posted:

Who is Daria?

Infowars producer

Born and raised in Russia I guess

Piell
Sep 3, 2006

Grey Worm's Ken doll-like groin throbbed with the anticipatory pleasure that only a slightly warm and moist piece of lemoncake could offer


Young Orc

BigglesSWE posted:

Who is Daria?

She's a producer for Infowars and was the Corporative Representative for Infowars at probably the wildest deposition

Robo Reagan
Feb 12, 2012

by Fluffdaddy

Grand Fromage posted:

An InfoWars corporate person who seems to be a complete psycho given her deposition. Also possibly Alex's handler.

she also grew up in russia. how topical, given the last few years

BigglesSWE
Dec 2, 2014

How 'bout them hawks news huh!

Grand Fromage posted:

An InfoWars corporate person who seems to be a complete psycho given her deposition. Also possibly Alex's handler (Alex has previously said on air he's been in contact with Russian intelligence).

Oh poo poo that was her? I remember that now.

Tree Dude
May 26, 2012

AND MY SONG IS...

BigglesSWE posted:

Who is Daria?

Sounds like they're getting into it but she's an Info Wars producer and she acted as a corporate representative (the second of 3 because none of them could do the job properly) for Infowars/Freespeech Systems at the depositions.

Grand Fromage
Jan 30, 2006

L-l-look at you bar-bartender, a-a pa-pathetic creature of meat and bone, un-underestimating my l-l-liver's ability to metab-meTABolize t-toxins. How can you p-poison a perfect, immortal alcohOLIC?


Robo Reagan posted:

she also grew up in russia. how topical, given the last few years

Yeah caught me before my edit but Alex has said on air he's been in contact with Russian intelligence so it's not a joke that she could be his handler.

Grand Fromage
Jan 30, 2006

L-l-look at you bar-bartender, a-a pa-pathetic creature of meat and bone, un-underestimating my l-l-liver's ability to metab-meTABolize t-toxins. How can you p-poison a perfect, immortal alcohOLIC?


And being fawningly pro-Russia is pretty much Alex's only consistent position.

haljordan
Oct 22, 2004

the corpse of god is love.






Tree Dude posted:

It's Daria time

Alex Jones is standing on her neck.

Robo Reagan
Feb 12, 2012

by Fluffdaddy
poo poo put her on trial too

Tree Dude
May 26, 2012

AND MY SONG IS...

Grand Fromage posted:

And being fawningly pro-Russia is pretty much Alex's only consistent position.

Other than "GUNS GOOD" yeah pretty much

BigglesSWE
Dec 2, 2014

How 'bout them hawks news huh!

Grand Fromage posted:

And being fawningly pro-Russia is pretty much Alex's only consistent position.

Not to get into a slap fight about such things but he seems to be fiercely anti-vax and complained a lot about Trump not being as anti as he could have been.

Grand Fromage
Jan 30, 2006

L-l-look at you bar-bartender, a-a pa-pathetic creature of meat and bone, un-underestimating my l-l-liver's ability to metab-meTABolize t-toxins. How can you p-poison a perfect, immortal alcohOLIC?


BigglesSWE posted:

Not to get into a slap fight about such things but he seems to be fiercely anti-vax and complained a lot about Trump not being as anti as he could have been.

This is why I used the "pretty much" qualifier. Guns and being anti-vax are consistent from the earliest eps, yeah. I'm not counting The Globalists since there's nothing consistent about his conspiracy poo poo even within a single episode.

beaviss
Dec 20, 2021

Alex Jones arguing with a piece of poo poo
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z61W-ZkmYtU

BigglesSWE
Dec 2, 2014

How 'bout them hawks news huh!
Only video of Alex Jones you need to see is this:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iQtc36eZOWU

Tree Dude
May 26, 2012

AND MY SONG IS...

Grand Fromage posted:

I'm not counting The Globalists since there's nothing consistent about his conspiracy poo poo even within a single episode.

This is the same reason I wouldn't count his religious beliefs because whatever brand of Christianity/Woo he believes swings wildly from day to day or faster.

BigglesSWE
Dec 2, 2014

How 'bout them hawks news huh!
https://twitter.com/gotobedjordan/status/1552035750283096064?s=20&t=BoARvWJ1HybNsjeU_kjYxw

Tree Dude
May 26, 2012

AND MY SONG IS...
Her 10 second pause before she answers every simple question is infuriating.

Robo Reagan
Feb 12, 2012

by Fluffdaddy

Tree Dude posted:

Her 10 second pause before she answers every simple question is infuriating.

gotta figure out wording for the most non answer possible

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Grand Fromage
Jan 30, 2006

L-l-look at you bar-bartender, a-a pa-pathetic creature of meat and bone, un-underestimating my l-l-liver's ability to metab-meTABolize t-toxins. How can you p-poison a perfect, immortal alcohOLIC?


Tree Dude posted:

This is the same reason I wouldn't count his religious beliefs because whatever brand of Christianity/Woo he believes swings wildly from day to day or faster.

I'm a fan of Cyber Satan.

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