olylifter posted:

WIBTA for putting my elderly mother in a nursing facility against her wishes?

JackSplater posted:

This screams of "My mother has a lot of money and I want it, but she wants to spend it making her retirement not poo poo and I can't have that"

Blue Moonlight posted:

Are you trying to tear this thread apart?

JackSplater posted:

This screams of "My mother has a lot of money and I want it, but she wants to spend it making her retirement not poo poo and I can't have that"

therobit posted:

Wait till he finds out how expensive the old folks home is.

quote:

My wife and I have been arguing about this for weeks and she suggested I post here.

My wife is 16 weeks pregnant with our first child. We have been discussing how to use our family leave. Each of us get 8 weeks of family leave to be used within the first year of the baby's life. My wife is planning on taking her whole 8 weeks right when the baby in born. She thinks that I should take 2 weeks when the baby is born and 6 weeks when she goes back to work so that we don't need to put the kid in childcare until he's 14 weeks old. The issue is that I want to use 2 weeks of my paternity leave to visit my family who live out of state so I don't have to use vacation days. I gave her two options:

I can spend 6 weeks with the baby when she goes back to work but I won't take the first 2 weeks off.

I can take 2 weeks off when the baby is born and then 4 weeks off when she goes back to work. This is my preference.

My wife says this is unacceptable and that I'm prioritizing my family over her and the baby. I disagree. I don't think it makes much of a difference if the baby starts daycare at 12 or 14 weeks. I only get to see my family once or twice a year since they moved out of state and I think this is a good opportunity to do so without it impacting our vacation time. I think her dislike of my family is affecting her logic and that, if they got along better, she would be fine with this arrangement. Plus, lots of men don't take paternity leave and their families manage. I'm still dedicating 6 weeks to the baby so we will have plenty of bonding time.

AITA or is she being unreasonable?

quote:

Im 28M, about to end an engagement with 29F, over her sexual history. I'm in the process of getting my affairs in order legally & financially before I do. I feel terrible because she has just designed her dream ring (and it has cost me an absolute fortune, lol). I've known this about her for a while and thought I could get over it.

Before you jump down my throat, let me offer you my viewpoint...

I've never had a FWB or a one-night-stand. I've never been a partier. I've studied hard, worked hard, saved and invested in a business that does quite well for itself whilst becoming a commercial pilot. My partner, on the other hand, has 0 assets, 0 money, and is in an entry level job. She has slept with 28 people, I've slept with 10. She said she was not looking for anything serious when she was younger, and just wanted to party.. Hence finally graduating university @ 28. In her words they were all one night stands or gently caress buddies. She did have a serious relationship of 5 years before I met her.

She is extremely beautiful and way out of my league, for what it's worth. She is actually a truly amazing partner who absolutely adores and loves me.

My thought is; I do not want a wife that has been so easy to gently caress. It's purely that simple. I do not shame her, I do not judge her but I judge whether or not she is RIGHT FOR ME. I do not want to bump into some guy who's plowed my wife. I do not want some guys to be sitting around swapping stories of girls they've banged, and be talking about my wife (and if you're going to pretend blokes don't do this.. I'm guessing the fedora you wear has cut circulation off to your brain).

It's really as simple as this..

Women can gently caress whoever the want, whenever they want. So can men.

But I can date whoever I want, with whatever parameters I want. If dating a woman who hasn't rode the cockcarousel is a requirement, than that's okay. What is NOT okay is shaming the individual. This goes both ways, by the way.

I would love some input on this. If someone can offer up some suggestions, I would truly love it because I do love this woman. She's literally my best friend. But now I'm weighing up whether or not I can wife up a former party girl.

Tl;Dr girlfriend has been very promiscuous in her young years. Don't think I can go through with marriage as it just isn't sitting right with me. I truly love her, but I'm not sure she's meant to be my wife.

quote:

This sounds ridiculous, I know. So here we go:

I, not Japanese, live with my Japanese wife in Japan. We have been married for 10 years. We have a great marriage, no problems at all. We barely fight, less than once a month.

We don’t have long text conversations, we only ask the usual “dinner where?” or “what time u arrive?”. This morning she sent me a text thanking me for surprising her with a present (some images on the wall of something she likes), and also for making coffee for her before I left for work (I don’t drink coffee). She then sent a sticker of a cartoon man sending a kiss.

I answered “you are welcome. I don’t like the sticker of the man sending kisses or with hearts”

She got mad. Sent three question marks, I didn’t reply because I was walking to the office, she called me and asked me if I was joking. I told her in a neutral voice I was not joking and she wanted to know why. I told her I was about to enter the building and I couldn’t talk because I would be late. She asked me to call her when I could and I did, 30 minutes later. She was still mad about it and wanted to talk about it.

She said she did nothing wrong, she was just been grateful, “cute and funny”. I told her it was not cute for me. I tried to explain I do use stickers sometimes (never with her or coworkers, only with friends and only when joking), but I rather her send me the usual cat stickers she sends OR EVEN BETTER, no stickers and just type “kisses” or “love u” or whatever.

She said it shouldn’t be an issue for me, because it was just a sticker, I told her it was not an issue for me because I was not mad about it; I just had asked her not to send me that. I also said I didn’t want to keep seeing that sticker for the rest of my life on a daily basis, specially when she is not joking, but telling me for real that she loves me or that she sends me a kiss. I asked her why was that sticker necessary or why it needed to be me the one who accepted the sticker instead of her just stopping sending it.

She said it was because it is the only sticker that comes out when she types kiss and I that, according to me, was the end of it.

“If you already typed KISS, why don’t you just leave it like that? Just leave the words, don’t get the sticker!”

She hanged up, very mad, and texted later on that she didn’t feel like having dinner with me today and that she would be coming late.

AITA?

AceClown posted:

WIBTA if I used part of my paternity leave to visit my family?

AceClown posted:

From the comments he has no need or interest in her money

quote:

home-help style setups are too expensive.

therobit posted:

Ending engagement over sexual history

I thought for sure he was hoy to say she was his first and only but dude is in double digits of partners himself. It’s good he’s leaving he because she’ll be better off.

Foo Diddley posted:

okay, who's ready to get mad?

AITA for “ruining” my brothers book?

Pookah posted:

My brother-in-law highlights any lines he finds interesting - not just in textbooks, literally any kind of book.
He'll easily do it multiple times in a single page.

quote:

I received some weird feedback on my appearance and hobbies and as a 40 year old woman I’m worried.

Growing up I was never a girly girl and hated dresses (still do) and lived in shorts and jeans. As a young adult my interests moved to cars, how things work like computers and other things typically deemed “boy stuff”.

My female friends see me growing up as a tomboy as more of a bonus in a relationship for guys. My dad never had a son and we have a great relationship because we work on everything mechanical and electrical together. We both love American muscle cars and he taught all of his daughters basic car maintenance.

Well the men I know say I am way too masculine for a woman and that it’s unattractive. One guy said I don’t even have scent which is weird to say. Another said dating me would be like dating a guy. However, I’m not into sports or anything like that so I don’t get the comparison of being too masculine as a woman. Obviously I shower every day but lost interest in perfumes as a kid because tools were way more cool.

Guys is it important women you date have a signature scent or perfume/body lotion? While I use body lotions they aren’t heavily scented at all. All these years I kind of assumed it is because I have lived in the South most of my life being the reason for not finding a husband. My goal is to move in a few years but it will likely be the East Coast area. I can’t stand Texas and the dating options here are slim and none.

I have no kids and have never been married so at least three rude guys asked “What’s wrong with you?”. The area I live in is LCOL but deals with a high number of single moms and people on government assistance. Good employers here are difficult to hired on for and I made it to let’s say MegaCorp.

Am I being too harsh or can a perfume make me more feminine to the males who gave me feedback. An ex-boyfriend I dated did volunteer to tell me how nice I look when I dressed up and complimented me on being girly because he knew it took effort. However it was never a dealbreaker. He never mentioned perfume so I feel pretty clueless right now.

Jack-Off Lantern posted:

You know I read this and can't loving imagine giving a 14 week infant into a daycare.

Like ever. I stayed home a full year to help my wife.

I didn't even read the pertinent part of the story.

Arsenic Lupin posted:

I did it at eight weeks. Thanks, capitalism!

Agaragon posted:

I used to lend out my books to a coworker but that ended when she got arrested, and plead guilty to, involuntary manslaughter. Fentanyl overdose, she just left the guy out on her porch overnight where he died. There was a hospital a quarter of a mile away. You could see part of it from her house.

I use receipts as bookmarks!

AceClown posted:

WIBTA if I used part of my paternity leave to visit my family?

AceClown posted:

WIBTA if I used part of my paternity leave to visit my family?

Silly Newbie posted:

Holy poo poo how would you not want to maximize time spent with your brand new infant?
My spouse got pregnant in February, and I spent the next 9 months maximizing paid time off so I could spend every possible moment of the first part of my child's life at home with my child and partner. I think I was able to do like two months, stringing it all together. Between being there for post-partum support and having bonding time with my new child, it was the best decision I ever made.
I try not to be so "look how cool I am" in this thread but super gently caress that guy, treating available bonding time with his infant as free days to go on vacation.

champagne posting posted:

You’re pretty loving cool though keep it up!

therobit posted:

Ending engagement over sexual history

quote:

This is complex and women won't understand because whats important to them is not whats important to us.

28 is a concerning number. Promiscuity is not what any man wants in his woman. Especially not a guy whos worked his rear end off and dedicated his life to quality over quantity.

10 relationships by 28 tells me you were careful and picky on your choices, probably even took breaks in between them and reflected and learned on how to be a better partner. 28 at 28..yikes no breaks, jumping from bed to bed, took every relationship as a whatever.

edgeman83 posted:

The comments on that one are basically what you would expect, with this one being my favorite:

28 is way too many but 10 is being careful, if you say so.

quote:

his woman

edgeman83 posted:

The comments on that one are basically what you would expect, with this one being my favorite:

28 is way too many but 10 is being careful, if you say so.

Silly Newbie posted:

From that:

28 is a concerning number. Promiscuity is not what any man wants in his woman. Especially not a guy whos worked his rear end off and dedicated his life to quality over quantity.

Lol this dude telling on himself when he can't connect "person who has been with several people choosing me and thinking I'm the best person to be with" to "quality over quantity". Like, my dude, if someone slept with, or dated, or whatever 1000 people and decided that you, out of all of them, were the person worth being with for the rest of forever, that's not a bad thing.

Failed Imagineer posted:

Yeah it's pretty stupid to have such strong gender preferences. Probably 50% of the post-Zoomer generation are gonna be genderfluid dickgirls and whatnot anyway, so you might as well throw out your rulebook for "how to raise a big strong man"

AceClown posted:

WIBTA if I used part of my paternity leave to visit my family?

I only get to see my family once or twice a year

PiratePrentice posted:

Someone torpedoing their own relationship and forbidding their husband from attending the baby shower and delivery because he was more excited to have a boy instead of a girl is not something I thought anyone would be totally on board for, I have to say.

StrangersInTheNight posted:

Barudak posted:

Americans now have a fairly explicit preference for girls over boys

Barudak posted:

Americans now have a fairly explicit preference for girls over boys

Sex Farm posted:

What

teen witch posted:

??