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goatface posted:Have you tried telling them they can eat pizza at any time? Please stop putting ideas in the workers' heads
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# ? Mar 17, 2023 14:22 |
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# ? Jun 8, 2024 07:59 |
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Never, someone needs to.
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# ? Mar 17, 2023 14:24 |
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goatface posted:Have you tried telling them they can eat pizza at any time? Why, is it on a bagel?
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# ? Mar 17, 2023 14:42 |
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goatface posted:Have you tried telling them they can eat pizza at any time? If I tell them to spend their own money on pizza I'll have a riot on my hands. I'm distracting them with a staff day: mimosas, thrift shop costumes and brunch. But really that's a delaying tactic until we can find money for the pizza budget.
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# ? Mar 17, 2023 14:47 |
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Buddy, it can be if you dream big.
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# ? Mar 17, 2023 14:47 |
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goatface posted:Have you tried telling them they can eat pizza at any time? If it's good enough for the governor of New Mexico, it's good enough for you!
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# ? Mar 17, 2023 14:48 |
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Outrail posted:If I tell them to spend their own money on pizza I'll have a riot on my hands. Tell them to be more adventurous in their demands. Insist upon a fancy food truck and a variety of owls to play with.
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# ? Mar 17, 2023 14:50 |
Pizza parties are always my favorite replacement for raises.
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# ? Mar 17, 2023 14:57 |
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Invalid Validation posted:Pizza parties are always my favorite replacement for raises. Is the pizza inflation-adjusted?
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# ? Mar 17, 2023 15:01 |
Almost certainly because our wages sure as poo poo ain’t.
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# ? Mar 17, 2023 15:02 |
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A gin tasting course, a big bucket of crayfish and a campfire. Three types of pie and a milkshake bar. Dozens of puppies and Lebanese food. A variety of breakable objects, baseball bats and some safety goggles.
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# ? Mar 17, 2023 15:52 |
TotalLossBrain posted:Is the pizza inflation-adjusted? oops all bubbles
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# ? Mar 17, 2023 16:12 |
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Barudak posted:I have a meeting next week to explain that I sold almost twice as much stuff in a controlled comparative period. Lets see what happens ya'll! Oh poo poo, you sold twice as much stuff? Knowing your company, that’s exactly what they didn’t want!
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# ? Mar 17, 2023 16:28 |
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goatface posted:owls to play with. Nightmare poo poo
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# ? Mar 17, 2023 16:29 |
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My company announced a new position last Thursday in key markets, jobs can be applied for starting Monday! The postings close today, and still 40% went without an application so impromptu conference calls happened yesterday to encourage more people to apply. No, it’s not a promotion so no pay increase. But a different bonus structure you could make so much money! Also, feel free to apply in any market you want (no relocation costs to be paid) you can go wherever you want in this company! Oh and your old position will not be backfilled, your teammates will be distributed your work, while you will continue to work with that team in this new position! So stupid. The only way to not give your team more work is to apply for a job and relocate out of your own pocket. Except your old team will still get screwed when you don’t get backfilled. No wonder no one is applying. JUST MAKING CHILI fucked around with this message at 18:07 on Mar 17, 2023 |
# ? Mar 17, 2023 17:04 |
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Escape From Noise posted:Nightmare poo poo *Wet* owls to play with!
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# ? Mar 17, 2023 17:51 |
My sister used to work at a private zoo that had an owl you could pet and that was pretty cool. Also a wallaby to pet and you could feed some gators.
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# ? Mar 17, 2023 18:45 |
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TaurusTorus posted:The mental image of no employees paying and all the pizza being thrown out is hilarious to me. Cyrano4747 posted:This is really common with government jobs. Basically there were regulations put in place after scandals about My TAX DOLLARS paying for a few senior people to hold a ten minute meeting over a weekend in Vegas, and as a result the office workers in the Fed Paperwork Factory need to all chip in out of their own pockets if they want a two pizzas in the lunchroom Christmas party.
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# ? Mar 17, 2023 19:00 |
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SubponticatePoster posted:They did have the presence of mind to require signing up and pre-paying. For extra fun you had to go on your lunch or break - we weren't given permission to leave desks for 20 minutes to go have the morale-boosting pizza. I'm no expert, but that doesn't sound like morale-boosting pizza at all!
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# ? Mar 17, 2023 19:21 |
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i generally like a pizza party cause i'm getting paid to eat pizza
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# ? Mar 17, 2023 19:24 |
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SubponticatePoster posted:They did have the presence of mind to require signing up and pre-paying. For extra fun you had to go on your lunch or break - we weren't given permission to leave desks for 20 minutes to go have the morale-boosting pizza. So they expected to get credit for... what? Ordering the pizza for you? lol
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# ? Mar 17, 2023 19:30 |
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Our HR guys will bring around popsicles on hot days because there’s no air conditioning in the warehouse. Except there’s air conditioning in our part. Still, free popsicles make me happy. They’re even the kind with two sticks.
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# ? Mar 17, 2023 20:11 |
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I just got back from spending a week in the office with my new team and one of them has an undetermined something wrong with her. She has decades of experience with multiple companies, so she knows or knew how to do something similar to this AND she used to do a lot of vendor visits in her previous position; she should be good for this new team as we're trying to create vendor relationships as we move parts out of a failing manufacturing company. I'm a little worried now. She got lost on her 1 mile drive between the hotel she was staying in and the office on the first day. She's stayed in that hotel and come to this office in the last year by her own admission, nothing has changed in that time and she obviously has a GPS on her phone. She declined going to dinner with the team on the first night so she could go to this lovely restaurant that has bread she likes. Not anything on the menu, the complementary bread served with meals. She spent the last few weeks talking about how this coming weekend she was going to have to drive around a bunch of her husband's friends, but this week she changed her flight so that her husband was going to pick up her and his friends from the airport at the same time. However, when it came time to carpool to do a vendor visit she claimed she got car sick if it was more than her in the car and she wouldn't go. It took me most of the ride to the vendor to put together the contradictions. Describing our conversations about work would take a lot of explaining, but she absolutely refused the idea of working in the program we need to work in because "it's not what I know" and apparently can't read drawings, doesn't know how our trade compliance works and her major qualification seems to be vendor relationship building, but I found out she hasn't even contacted any of the vendors on her list. I just about lost it at that point. The highlight (lowlight?) came during the vendor visit, her supposed specialty. I arranged for a few of our team members to visit a site I used to go to twice a week in another life, and one we were now looking to park a good number of parts with. We get our temp badges and sit in the conference room with their reps and she says...nothing. Not a single word. Dead silence for the entire vendor presentation and no comments when I explained our reason for visiting, our team's mission and the prospects we were offering. Whatever, everything went smoothly with me taking the lead (something I wasn't expecting to do, usually the highest ranked or most experienced person does that and we had an engineer who was working for the company for a year before I was born), but on the way out she decided to tell them EVERYTHING from the current vendor to the problems they were having to the dislike she had of other vendors in a different commodity and finished by telling them they were going to get SO MUCH WORK from us because they had a very clean shop. That's just about everything we weren't supposed to say. I had drinks with my boss and boss' boss after that and told them both that she needed to be monitored and may not last long on the team. I'm no longer even sure what we are expecting her to do.
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# ? Mar 17, 2023 20:35 |
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Lazyfire posted:I just got back from spending a week in the office with my new team and one of them has an undetermined something wrong with her. She has decades of experience with multiple companies, so she knows or knew how to do something similar to this AND she used to do a lot of vendor visits in her previous position; she should be good for this new team as we're trying to create vendor relationships as we move parts out of a failing manufacturing company. I'm a little worried now. Does she hate someone on the team? Very aggressively avoiding team building and social activities for a role that is supposedly social.
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# ? Mar 17, 2023 22:43 |
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Escape From Noise posted:Nightmare poo poo I don’t think they meant feral owls that were trapped the night before the party. Although that would also work, just to force the company to pay a company for decontamination of the office. Also, disgruntled employees could pay the handlers extra to have an owl do a dook on the managers keyboard.
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# ? Mar 17, 2023 23:04 |
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Bored posted:I don’t think they meant feral owls that were trapped the night before the party. I didn't, but now you mention it...
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# ? Mar 17, 2023 23:07 |
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Maybe she is a nepotism hire or something, none of her actions really make sense
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# ? Mar 17, 2023 23:10 |
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It's genuinely frightening when you meet someone who doesn't seem to have an internal logic. Either you or her or both you and her had a stroke. She has a drug habit. She's having an affair and most of the absences were excuses to run off with her partner. Or as Chewbacca said, she's a nepotism hire and you're going to have to babysit her for the rest of your/her career.
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# ? Mar 17, 2023 23:43 |
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The thing about nepotism hires is, as the person on the receiving end of that hiring process...isn't that incredibly stressful? I would very much hate to be tasked with activities I was unable to deliver to. I would be mortified if I was a part of a team and clearly didn't match their skillset. also it's ChewBECCA
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# ? Mar 17, 2023 23:48 |
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Nepo hire
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# ? Mar 17, 2023 23:53 |
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“Person X isn’t trained for task but cases keep ending up in their stack and they’ve just had their fifth one today, can you remove that from their profile” I can, but they’ve had that particular skill in their profile since the beginning of January and been assigned over 200 cases through it, so where did all of those cases go if Person X couldn’t handle them and why didn’t they say anything in January? “They aren’t trained in it, thanks” *signs off* ‘Team Leaders’ in every company I’ve ever worked are just the absolute most loving useless form of middle management.
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# ? Mar 17, 2023 23:53 |
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Lazyfire posted:I just got back from spending a week in the office with my new team and one of them has an undetermined something wrong with her. She has decades of experience with multiple companies, so she knows or knew how to do something similar to this AND she used to do a lot of vendor visits in her previous position; she should be good for this new team as we're trying to create vendor relationships as we move parts out of a failing manufacturing company. I'm a little worried now. What’s her forums name? Edit: ask her if her house has stairs. Automatic Retard fucked around with this message at 00:02 on Mar 18, 2023 |
# ? Mar 17, 2023 23:54 |
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I work with a nepo hire. When I complained that they didn't have particular skills required for the job title that we share, my boss told me that: 1) "they have other qualities" 2) "they are a nice person so you should focus on that" Guess who all of the things that this person can't do get rerouted to
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# ? Mar 17, 2023 23:58 |
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Decades of experience and making GBS threads up the standard role tasks suggests to me someone who's gonna be retiring soon and has stopped giving a poo poo.
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# ? Mar 18, 2023 00:56 |
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Outrail posted:It's genuinely frightening when you meet someone who doesn't seem to have an internal logic. No, I'm the nepo hire if anyone is, completely leveraged my wife's connections to get this job. When talking to my boss' boss the other night neither of us could come up for a role she could fulfil. I am both a vendor relations person and know the purchasing system, but can also read drawings and create purchase orders. Neither of us can figure out what she does besides talking about her son who is my age and having a husband in North Carolina. She also believes that upstate NY (where I live and she lived until recently) somehow outproduces New York city economically, which is...laughable at best.
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# ? Mar 18, 2023 01:17 |
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Johnny Truant posted:i generally like a pizza party cause i'm getting paid to eat pizza A+ avatar/post combo
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# ? Mar 18, 2023 01:18 |
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Bored posted:I don’t think they meant feral owls that were trapped the night before the party. Although that would also work, just to force the company to pay a company for decontamination of the office. Also, disgruntled employees could pay the handlers extra to have an owl do a dook on the managers keyboard. I really don't like birds.
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# ? Mar 18, 2023 03:53 |
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Lazyfire posted:No, I'm the nepo hire if anyone is, completely leveraged my wife's connections to get this job. So the company has a history of nepo hires.
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# ? Mar 18, 2023 05:02 |
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Outrail posted:So the company has a history of nepo hires. Not as bad as some places, but my wife has to rearrange some guys recently because someone was supervising their father in law.
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# ? Mar 18, 2023 05:11 |
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# ? Jun 8, 2024 07:59 |
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Escape From Noise posted:I really don't like birds. Fair enough. How about you replace the bird rental with, like, puppy or sloth rental.
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# ? Mar 18, 2023 06:07 |