r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

«‹›3575 »

SulfurMonoxideCute: Feb 9, 2008; I was under direct orders not to die
🐵❌💀

Beverage appropriateness is a social construct.

# ? May 26, 2023 05:48

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 13, 2024 23:50

Magic Hate Ball: May 6, 2007; ha ha ha!
you've already paid for this

Mx. posted:

how much % tip should you give the bartender when you order the milk

# ? May 26, 2023 05:53

DeeplyConcerned: Apr 29, 2008; I can fit 3 whole bud light cans now, ask me how!

Lethrom posted:

What if someone orders iced tea at a bar? Is that like a tankie thing, or is it more on the anarchist side of the spectrum?

You mean sweet tea?

# ? May 26, 2023 05:53

kru: Oct 5, 2003

* walks into thread with milk mustache, quickly moonwalks out *

# ? May 26, 2023 05:56

titty_baby_: Nov 11, 2015

Captain Hygiene posted:

Friendship ended with MILK DERAIL

AITA for complaining that my wife and sister drink too much water?

Now WATER DERAIL is my best friend

"I can't stand the flavorless taste" wtf does this person drink instead?

I know its probably diet coke

# ? May 26, 2023 06:01

420 Gank Mid: Dec 26, 2008; WARNING: This poster is a huge bitch!

Lethrom posted:

What if someone orders iced tea at a bar? Is that like a tankie thing, or is it more on the anarchist side of the spectrum?

my date ordered fermented mare's milk should i be worried they are going to kill me with horse archery and sack my cities

# ? May 26, 2023 06:02

420 Gank Mid: Dec 26, 2008; WARNING: This poster is a huge bitch!

edit 1: I thought it was a red flag but no it was a red banner she is calling the eight banners and riding to war

# ? May 26, 2023 06:04

Nae: Sep 3, 2020; what.

Clocks posted:

Forget milk. Milkshakes are where it's at. Unfortunately most bars don't serve those. I did have a bourbon milkshake at a restaurant once, but honestly I'm not a huge fan of bourbon so it felt a bit superfluous.

Mudslides are a close approximation of a milkshake in a pinch.

# ? May 26, 2023 06:11

Private Cumshoe: Feb 15, 2019; AAAAAAAGAGHAAHGGAH

people who can't drink water are the worst

# ? May 26, 2023 06:24

duck trucker: Oct 14, 2017; YOSPOS

*date orders milk*

"Whoa didn't realize I was on a date with Harley Quinn here!"

# ? May 26, 2023 06:26

Tobermory: Mar 31, 2011

This is the title of a post from last month:

My GF (24) breastfed my brother (3) because in her country (Europe) women even without milk let's babies on their breasts just to stop them crying when their mom is not available. Am I overreacting because I told her to not keep this going but she can't seem to understand why it's weird.

Now we can talk about milk and dating in a context that is Completely Normal in Europe.

# ? May 26, 2023 06:46

Mx.: Dec 16, 2006; I'm a great fan! When I watch TV I'm always saying "That's political correctness gone mad!"
Why thankyew!

ah, no thank you

# ? May 26, 2023 06:48

well why not: Feb 10, 2009

/r/relationships: in her country (Europe)

# ? May 26, 2023 06:55

Private Cumshoe: Feb 15, 2019; AAAAAAAGAGHAAHGGAH

# ? May 26, 2023 06:55

sephiRoth IRA: Jun 13, 2007; "Science is not only compatible with spirituality; it is a profound source of spirituality."

-Carl Sagan

That's bait (for some weirdo to jerk off about).jpg

# ? May 26, 2023 06:57

Pope Corky the IX: Dec 18, 2006; What are you looking at?

Batterypowered7 posted:

You don't give the bartender the tip, you give the mohel the tip.

Please don�t go making a mountain out of a mohel.

# ? May 26, 2023 07:15

3D Megadoodoo: Nov 25, 2010

Tobermory posted:

This is the title of a post from last month:

My GF (24) breastfed my brother (3) because in her country (Europe) women even without milk let's babies on their breasts just to stop them crying when their mom is not available. Am I overreacting because I told her to not keep this going but she can't seem to understand why it's weird.

Now we can talk about milk and dating in a context that is Completely Normal in Europe.

This reminded me of a bit in Just For Laughs where a waitress asked if the customer wanted milk in their coffee and then squirted it into the cup out of their tit. It was kinda hosed up.

# ? May 26, 2023 07:45

Pirate Radar: Apr 18, 2008; You're not my Ruthie!
You're not my Debbie!
You're not my Sherry!

3D Megadoodoo posted:

This reminded me of a bit in Just For Laughs where a waitress asked if the customer wanted milk in their coffee and then squirted it into the cup out of their tit. It was kinda hosed up.

In Quebec this is very normal.

None of you can be sure if I�m joking

# ? May 26, 2023 08:01

Doc Hawkins: Jun 15, 2010; Dashing? But I'm not even moving!

seems like more of a toronto thing

# ? May 26, 2023 08:11

QuarkJets: Sep 8, 2008

In Europe they don't put salt on popcorn, they use sugar instead. Similarly, they don't put milk in their coffee, they use fresh placenta

# ? May 26, 2023 08:11

mllaneza: Apr 28, 2007; Veteran, Bermuda Triangle Expeditionary Force, 1993-1952

Nae posted:

Mudslides are a close approximation of a milkshake in a pinch.

Mudslides rule, that's an amazing cocktail.

Here's something you can do easy at home:

1 oz. vodka
4 heaping tbsp ice cream
enjoy your nap

# ? May 26, 2023 08:16

Pope Corky the IX: Dec 18, 2006; What are you looking at?

Gonna order a glass of afterbirth at the bar because it�s clearly not the weirdest option.

# ? May 26, 2023 08:28

Kit Walker: Jul 10, 2010; "The Man Who Cannot Deadlift"

Pirate Radar posted:

Is ordering milk at a bar kiki or bouba?

Definitely bouba. Which is weird because the word "milk" is definitely kiki

# ? May 26, 2023 08:53

Captain Fargle: Feb 16, 2011

QuarkJets posted:

In Europe they don't put salt on popcorn, they use sugar instead. Similarly, they don't put milk in their coffee, they use fresh placenta

Here in Northern Ireland you can get it with salt AND sugar!

hosed up I know.

# ? May 26, 2023 08:53

greazeball: Feb 4, 2003

I like my coffee with salt and my placenta with sugar

# ? May 26, 2023 09:18

CaptainSarcastic: Jul 6, 2013

I heard there was a milk derail going on, so I thought I'd remind people that I order milk with drat near every meal, and drink milk with drat near every meal at home. Aside from pizza and a few other things, milk is the correct accompaniment. Even burgers I will drink milk with, although that one's more common at home than out.

# ? May 26, 2023 09:24

Mx.: Dec 16, 2006; I'm a great fan! When I watch TV I'm always saying "That's political correctness gone mad!"
Why thankyew!

AITA for "ambushing" my sister at her wedding reception, because she told me her wedding was child free when it actually wasn't?

quote:

My (46 m) sister Tracy (29 f) and I aren't close, but we have a good relationship (at least before this all happened).

Tracy got married recently, and she told me the wedding was child free. I have a daughter Ella (12 f) and asked Tracy if she could come, but she said sorry, she and her partner were sticking to the rules. I managed to arrange for Ella to stay at a friend's house for a couple of days, since the wedding was in a different city.

So I went to the wedding and I saw quite a few older children, including my other siblings' kids. I know this sounds like I should've known from before from my other siblings, but I never thought to ask them 'oh are your kids going'. I did ask my brother at the wedding and he said he was told the child free limit was only for really young kids, the disruptive ages.

It was obvious Tracy lied to me about not bringing Ella. We went through the ceremony and towards the end of the reception, I pulled Tracy aside and said I realized she'd completely lied to me and there were plenty of other kids.

She looked pretty uncomfortable and said it wasn't a big deal, but I replied I deserve an apology, and so does Ella at some point.

Tracy got mad and said I was ambushing her at her own wedding and it's her and her partner's choice what they do. We ended the conversation there and went off to talk to other people.

She sent me a text later saying I was being selfish and I'm the one that should be apologizing to her and her husband, for making a big deal out of this. I'll admit I sent a not-so-nice text back about her caring more about aesthetics than people. Now it's sort of blown up within our family.

aesthetics?

quote:

My daughter has an amputated arm. My sister didn't say it directly, but I could tell this was most likely the reason why. Ella's a well behaved girl. She has had some body image issues in recent times so my sister's exclusion pissed me off even more so.

# ? May 26, 2023 09:28

Evil Willow: Apr 26, 2007; Bored now...

AITA for not letting my Girlfriend wear a bikini in front of my family?

quote:

So me (26M) and my Girlfriend (22F) have been dating for around 2 years now. We've had our ups and downs but overall we have a great relationship, and I definitely see a future together! We really love and respect each other and connect well! But the thing is we come from different backgrounds. I come from a Muslim Background (I'm not 'that' religious tho) and she is White. However, we have still made it work and our similarities are much more than our differences.

Now my gf does like wearing a bit short clothing when out and about, which used to bother me at first and made me uncomfortable and we did have a few minor fights over it, but eventually I came to terms with it.

However, recently an embarrassing situation happened. There was a pool party at my cousin's house, and my parents were there too. I had recently introduced my gf to my parents as well, so this was a good time for to meet family and relatives. I specifically told her to please pack something more on the modest side, as my family would be there (and most women usually don't wear such revealing stuff in our culture). She didn't give much of a response and just nodded.

But what did I see in the pool? Her wearing a two piece bikini (with kinda cheeky bottoms too)! Even one piece would've been more better, but nah she went all in this time! She was probably the one the dressed most immodestly.

No one said anything but afterwards, I was so embarrassed I couldn't show my face to my parents and all.

I did talk to her about it and scolded her a bit, and she told me "She can wear whatever the hell she wants, whenever she wants."

I couldn't say anything afterwards. We've been quiet to each other for a while but slowly making up now.

AITA?

# ? May 26, 2023 09:28

keep punching joe: Jan 22, 2006; Die Satan!

The one guy I know of who orders milk in a bar, and he's a hosed up fash transphobe who ruined cannon fodder 2 with lousy level design.

# ? May 26, 2023 09:39

3D Megadoodoo: Nov 25, 2010

We have a great relationship. I believe it is a thing to scold one's ~~property~~girlfriend, and she hasn't left me because of that. Yet.

# ? May 26, 2023 09:43

Kit Walker: Jul 10, 2010; "The Man Who Cannot Deadlift"

Ah yes, we're entering the "ordering milk is weird" -> "ordering milk is for manic pixie dreamgirls" -> "ordering milk is for nazis" pipeline. Looking forward to being dogpiled online for being a Modi supporter when I post about how I'm enjoying this order of schawarma

# ? May 26, 2023 09:43

Evil Willow: Apr 26, 2007; Bored now...

My 24M girlfriend 23F says I am being abusive.

quote:

I need to give a little backstory, so when I was younger maybe around 13-15 my older brother had this amazing girlfriend who I really liked and considered a part of the family. They broke up and I shortly find out the reason why is because she had cheated on him years ago and she finally came clean about it after years of built up guilt, he became very depressed and said he felt like he wasted so much time on her. I went to the internet and did more research on infidelity, it is plaguing America. No matter how much trust and love you have with someone, in my opinion if you put full trust into someone and never recognize the possibility of infidelity and never put up some kind of safeguard against it, you are a fool who may be wasting years of their life or even your entire life with someone with a secret affair. (Seriously go do research on infidelity and how common it is)

So I've adopted a few safeguards, no close opposite sex friends whom you spend private 1 on 1 time with in person, no going to bars or clubs without me, any time I get any type of gut feeling I ask to check your phone and declining my request or making me wait results in a breakup. (it is important to note when I check a phone I ONLY look at messages between my partner and a unknown person, looking at anything else would be a breach of privacy in my eyes) So far these safeguards actually saved me from wasting time on someone who cheated on me, without these safeguards it would've flown under my radar. I also uphold these rules on myself, I don't have friendships with any women, I don't go to bars without my gf despite being a person who likes going to bars, Any time my partner asks to check my phone I oblige without question. I also let my partners know about these safeguards early on in the relationship, my current gf was actually happy about it and accepted them because I uphold the rules on myself and it makes her comfortable in the relationship.

The problem arose when she met a guy while working, he told her he had just moved recently and was looking for new friends, they exchanged contacts and she told me about it. I was fine with it because I really don't care if my partner is simply in contact with guys in the area. Then told me she was going to get coffee with this guy, I told her if she does then I'd break up with her and I promptly asked to check her messages with this guy. She was hesitant but when I told her I was going to end things if I couldn't check immediately she let me. He was flirting with her by making comments on how beautiful she is and I told her to cut all contact with the guy. I was met with the "you're being abusive and controlling, you're insecure" but she cut contact with him anyway and told me "I don't like these rules, I won't break up with you but please reconsider having them." Which I found ridiculous but I did research and supposedly the things I do are "red flags" and "toxic." Are these things really so bad? I don't want my gf to feel like I am controlling her. Your opinion on the situation is greatly appreciated and I thank you for reading what I wrote.

# ? May 26, 2023 09:50

Evil Willow: Apr 26, 2007; Bored now...

AITA for not taking my wife's side and siding with my parents?

quote:

Background: My wife (28 F) and I (30 M), as well as my brother and his wife went to visit our parents as we haven't seen them in a while. My parents (57) had a box of $300 ginseng in the fridge to be given as a gift for their close friend's wedding anniversary tommorow � we know this because it came up in conversation during lunch. They also told us to help ourselves to anything in the fridge but to not touch the ginseng for obvious reasons.

The problem came when a few hours later my parents called us in a panic saying that they couldn't find the ginseng and if anyone saw it. I didn't take it and at first I thought they just misplaced it somewhere. However, they insisted that they both agreed on not moving it out of the fridge drawer for that exact reason. All of us denied taking it and the conversation got more heated when my father started yelling that someone must have taken it since it only went missing when we came to visit.

All of us continued to deny taking it, with my wife being really quiet, and my father said that if it doesn't turn up soon, he'd have to have everyone's belongings checked. That was when my wife admitted that she took it. Apparently it was some popular brand that my in-laws mentioned and she wanted to give it to them, and she thought that no one would notice since it was in an inconspicuous place in the fridge.

My MIL later called and said my parents overreacted over "such an inconsequential thing" and screamed at me that I was an rear end in a top hat for not defending my wife. The thing is, imo it wasn't a small thing, my wife literally stole hundreds of dollars from my parents and tried to lie her way out of it.

While I agree that my parents shouldn't have started yelling and accusing us, I feel like my wife was in the wrong for taking the ginseng in the first place. This situation has caused a lot of friction and we haven't been speaking since coming home. AITA?

# ? May 26, 2023 10:10

Midnight Voyager: Jul 2, 2008; Lipstick Apathy

Evil Willow posted:

My 24M girlfriend 23F says I am being abusive.

Apparently many people are DMing him to privately say they agree. Which I can believe to some degree, incels on reddit. But......

quote:

I think it is smart to be cautious so long as it does not cause distress or negativity in your life. So far this is the second time I asked to check her phone. Therapists have told me what I am doing is a good idea.

Midnight Voyager fucked around with this message at 10:17 on May 26, 2023

# ? May 26, 2023 10:14

3D Megadoodoo: Nov 25, 2010

All this time I've been buying off-brand ginseng?!?

# ? May 26, 2023 10:14

3D Megadoodoo: Nov 25, 2010

Midnight Voyager posted:

Apparently many people are texting him to privately say they agree. Which I can believe to some degree, incels on reddit. But......

A missing space, I think.

# ? May 26, 2023 10:15

Barry Bluejeans: Feb 2, 2017; ATTENTHUN THITIZENTH

3D Megadoodoo posted:

A missing space, I think.

# ? May 26, 2023 10:19

kru: Oct 5, 2003

keep punching joe posted:

The one guy I know of who orders milk in a bar, and he's a hosed up fash transphobe who ruined cannon fodder 2 with lousy level design.

He's an absolute loving idiot and this absolutely tracks

# ? May 26, 2023 10:24

Cowslips Warren: Oct 29, 2005; What use had they for tricks and cunning, living in the enemy's warren and paying his price?; Grimey Drawer

Midnight Voyager posted:

Apparently many people are DMing him to privately say they agree. Which I can believe to some degree, incels on reddit. But......

I mean she does seem like she was trying to sneak in a date. Coffee is one thing but I didn't read anywhere where she nipped the flirting in the bud.

# ? May 26, 2023 10:49

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 13, 2024 23:50

Kit Walker: Jul 10, 2010; "The Man Who Cannot Deadlift"

Cowslips Warren posted:

I mean she does seem like she was trying to sneak in a date. Coffee is one thing but I didn't read anywhere where she nipped the flirting in the bud.

The funny thing to me is that it seems insanely controlling dudes are exactly the type to get cheated on. If you were in a relationship with someone who watched you like a hawk, made it clear they didn't trust you further than they could throw you, and was always on the verge of accusing you of cheating on them, then actually cheating on them seems like the perfect choice to spite them when you get sick and tired of their behavior

# ? May 26, 2023 11:25

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

«‹›3575 »