Junk in the trunk

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > Junk in the trunk

sudonim: Oct 6, 2005

yoloer420 posted:

There is literally no reason you couldn't run the model (or an "almost as good" model) locally. You can get MCUs that can run CNNs more than large enough for your application for ~$15-20 USD a unit, you'd be able to easily keep the power draw under 10w which would be minimal compared to the pumps etc.

This is of course assuming that using AI is actually beneficial. As an alternative you could also use AI to derive a more traditional algorithm that would fit on a ~$0.20 MCU that will run on nanowatts of power. That way you can still use AI in your marketing without actually having to deal with the expense of running AI either in the cloud or on an edge device.

For data collection you could still have your mattress refuse to inflate unless its app connected during initial setup, and then again if it hasn't fed back data for X days.

I am available to consult lol.

I like how this is the 3rd or 4th time an engineery type chimes in about how OP's product is bad

# ? Oct 10, 2023 17:42

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# ? Jun 8, 2024 22:07

Modal Auxiliary: Jan 14, 2005

sudonim posted:

I like how this is the 3rd or 4th time an engineery type chimes in about how OP's product is bad

As a licensed therapist I would like to chime in and add that OP's lifestyle is also quite bad.

# ? Oct 10, 2023 18:13

Vim Fuego: Jun 1, 2000; Ultra Carp

Let me say this: I appreciate the genuine concern from the people that showed it. But there's also a lot of unwarranted negativity and outright hostility. I'm not really sure where that's coming from, but I assure you that this setup is working for me.

blight rhino posted:

You didn't answer if you have a place to live, that you pay for.

Otherwise, I missed it.

Also, what type of car is it? Searching found it to be a Suburu, Sedan, Legacy is basically 16' long. can you stretch out?

Do the cafeteria people wonder why you're there three times a day, every single day?

how many pairs of underwear do you have? Pants?

I've been pulling for you, but you're ignoring vital questions

I lived in a '98 toyota tercel, because I didn't have a loving choice, stop acting like you're all hoity-toity

Yes I've got a place. That's not what this thread is about. Vehicle is a 2020 Subaru WRX with access to the trunk which backseats folded down where I sleep on memory foam under a sleeping bag. Windows are limo tinted all around with additional sun shades to make them impossible to see through. All I bring with me is enough clothes for the week and hygiene essentials. I can stretch out ok.

I also have lockers at work so that saves me space.

BigBadSteve posted:

So what do you do when you need a poo poo at night OP... squat on the kerb?

Tristesse posted:

Where do you piss at night and why is it different when you piss on the curb vs the average unhoused person?

You are spending the majority of your life at work at this point, and the obsession over 500 bux in gas tells me they are not paying you enough to make up for that loss in work life balance. The way I look at it you aren't saving any commute time, you are just trading in ALL of your personal time during the week to the office for very little gain. I'm not cyberstalking you to find out what you home life is like but I would venture a guess that something unpleasant is happening to encourage you to act like an urchin and think this is some kind of neat shortcut to life.

There's a lot of bathroom questions. Listen, we're all adults here. I think this obsession is a little immature. I don't really need to go at night that often. But I work in tech (on-site) and I�m certainly lucky to work at a place with 24 hour access to Food, Showers and a Gym. So mostly that's the answer. In case of emergencies I do have a box of toilet gel packets but I have never needed to use them. For the curious: https://www.amazon.com/Poesie-Degradable-Absorbent-Recreation-Emergency/dp/B09LHCX7NF/

hbag posted:

i think he said earlier it's because the management don't want people not connecting their mattress to the wifi (lol)

the bed has loving drm

yoloer420 posted:

There is literally no reason you couldn't run the model (or an "almost as good" model) locally. You can get MCUs that can run CNNs more than large enough for your application for ~$15-20 USD a unit, you'd be able to easily keep the power draw under 10w which would be minimal compared to the pumps etc.

This is of course assuming that using AI is actually beneficial. As an alternative you could also use AI to derive a more traditional algorithm that would fit on a ~$0.20 MCU that will run on nanowatts of power. That way you can still use AI in your marketing without actually having to deal with the expense of running AI either in the cloud or on an edge device.

For data collection you could still have your mattress refuse to inflate unless its app connected during initial setup, and then again if it hasn't fed back data for X days.

I am available to consult lol.

Believe me, we've had these conversations. If you want to call it a pejorative term like DRM, then fine. Maybe this product isn't for you. But it's a project requirement that the mattress is connected when in use because of the utility of the active monitoring. That means we don't need a lot of onboard computing power because it's all done in the cloud. It's really not more sinister than that.

covidstomper58 posted:

I'd like to know how far the smart mattress has been trained on non human objects on the bed.

Does it know how to raise ridges around a body pillow so it doesn't slide around?

Can it detect human shaped objects and add simulated shuffling movements to it?

What about those pillows shaped like a human arm?

Is there a VR mode that detects when you have your VR headset on and the largest open area in your living situation is the bed and like sets the edges to your movement area? Like say in the back of a car?

I get that you're just joking about VR but no, we're not trying to integrate it with VR. The product is mainly for improving sleep. It does this by adjusting firmness and temperature automatically and at a high resolution. It has weight sensors under each cell in the grid, heat wires, and pex tubing for cooling. It's great for hot sleepers.

In terms of "knowing" what's on it we've discussed adding an infrared camera but that obviously would need to be mounted outside of the mattress and there's concerns that consumers would see it as intrusive. If we pursue that it'll be an optional add-on.

McSpanky posted:

It's fascinating that the people who have been driven to these extremes seem to always think that they've mastered a superior way of life or unlocked an amazing productivity/efficiency shortcut, instead of realizing that they're wage slaves who've chained themselves to the yoke willingly.

Modal Auxiliary posted:

As a licensed therapist I would like to chime in and add that OP's lifestyle is also quite bad.

It's working for me, that's why I'm sharing it with you. I showed my husband this thread and he thought it was pretty funny. Especially the stuff about the pet. He got me these little guys for weeknight company:

I'm gonna hatch 'em in a Big Gulp in the cupholder. If people are curious about updates I'll take some pics as they grow.

# ? Oct 10, 2023 20:47

hbag: Feb 13, 2021

uh-huh. a silicon valley company that doesn't make any money off you beyond the initial sale. sure thing bud

# ? Oct 10, 2023 20:52

Vim Fuego: Jun 1, 2000; Ultra Carp

Yes, there's a monthly fee for the active monitoring. It's not a one time cost because you're buying a product with a service, not just a big hunk of foam and springs.

# ? Oct 10, 2023 20:56

hbag: Feb 13, 2021

what does the mattress do that an apple watch's (or fitbit, etc) sleep monitoring thing doesn't

# ? Oct 10, 2023 21:00

ChubbyChecker: Mar 25, 2018

hbag posted:

what does the mattress do that an apple watch's (or fitbit, etc) sleep monitoring thing doesn't

it's softer to lie upon

# ? Oct 10, 2023 21:04

Eclipse12: Feb 20, 2008

Vim Fuego posted:

But there's also a lot of unwarranted negativity and outright hostility. I'm not really sure where that's coming from,

A lot of it is coming from me! :haw:

This isn't an AMA. Or, at least, not a good one. You're ignoring the most tangy, salty, and oh-so-sweaty questions (not a typo). The public needs to know!

Also, lol at the guy who's choosing to live in a car despite having a home and partner, and yet calls us immature.

# ? Oct 10, 2023 21:04

MrQwerty: Apr 15, 2003; LOVE IS BEAUTIFUL
(づ￣ ³￣)づ♥(‘∀’●)

How do you reconcile believing in your product while sleeping on corrugated metal and hard furniture

# ? Oct 10, 2023 21:05

Eclipse12: Feb 20, 2008

ChubbyChecker posted:

it's softer to lie upon

Hey, no jokes in here, buddy. This is a serious home of discourse.

# ? Oct 10, 2023 21:05

Chinatown: Sep 11, 2001; by Fluffdaddy; Fun Shoe

lmao @ everything

# ? Oct 10, 2023 21:06

pixaal: Jan 8, 2004; All ice cream is now for all beings, no matter how many legs.

Vim Fuego posted:

Especially the stuff about the pet. He got me these little guys for weeknight company:

I'm gonna hatch 'em in a Big Gulp in the cupholder. If people are curious about updates I'll take some pics as they grow.

Wont your car get too hot during the day? Are you going to bring them into work with you? I assume that's where this desk is.

# ? Oct 10, 2023 21:08

hbag: Feb 13, 2021

do brine shrimp really give a poo poo about temperature

# ? Oct 10, 2023 21:10

Eclipse12: Feb 20, 2008

Stop being immature. Now give me a moment to play with my anime toys and shrimp, please.

# ? Oct 10, 2023 21:13

Tristesse: Feb 23, 2006; Chasing the dream.

Serious question- If you're already using your worksite as a home for all functions during the week why not take the extra comfort step of climate control and sleep under your desk/ on a couch?

Also is your boss aware that you are doing this? At my office someone randomly tagging in and out of the office after-hours without explanation would trigger a theft investigation.

# ? Oct 10, 2023 21:15

ChairmanMauzer: Dec 30, 2004; It wears a human face.

What do you do with your free time on weekdays when you're not working (or do you have really long hours)?

Do you just hang out in libraries and coffee shops or other public spaces or in the office? Or do you chill in the car outside of sleeping, too?

# ? Oct 10, 2023 21:16

hbag: Feb 13, 2021

yeah if youre gonna sleep in your car at work at least get a loving RV or something

# ? Oct 10, 2023 21:16

ChubbyChecker: Mar 25, 2018

this is an exellent thread and i tip my fedora to the op for making it

# ? Oct 10, 2023 21:18

Flowers for QAnon: May 20, 2019

I would like to see the sea monkeys grow

# ? Oct 10, 2023 21:19

Konar: Dec 14, 2006; by Fluffdaddy

OP do you think Kaneda would approve of how you're living??

# ? Oct 10, 2023 21:24

numberoneposter: Feb 19, 2014; How much do I cum? The answer might surprise you!

shoulda got that subaru baja car truck thing and had more headroom

# ? Oct 10, 2023 21:24

hbag: Feb 13, 2021

if you arent selling peoples data why do your bosses give a gently caress if people dont connect it to their wifi

# ? Oct 10, 2023 21:27

AcidCat: Feb 10, 2005

Vim Fuego posted:

I showed my husband this thread and he thought it was pretty funny. Especially the stuff about the pet. He got me these little guys for weeknight company:

"What a silly thread, here's some hosed up shrimp to keep you company, see you next week!" says Husbando, living his best life.

# ? Oct 10, 2023 21:30

Bad Purchase: Jun 17, 2019

bought one of those triops kits for my partner who wanted to dabble in aquarium life before committing to something big

those drat things never hatched, tried multiple sets of sand with the eggs. it�s a scam.

did eventually get some tiny shrimp to take off and live for a while, but never saw a single triop over like half a year of trying

e: the shrimp were not baby triops if that�s what you�re thinking, different shape and movement than triops. looked at photos and videos to be sure.

Bad Purchase fucked around with this message at 21:58 on Oct 10, 2023

# ? Oct 10, 2023 21:41

Flowers for QAnon: May 20, 2019

Bad Purchase posted:

bought one of those triops kits for my partner who wanted to dabble in aquarium life before committing to something big

those drat things never hatched, tried multiple sets of sand with the eggs. it�s a scam.

did eventually get some tiny shrimp to take off and live for a while, but never saw a single triop over like half a year of trying

They Arent the same size as the one on the box bro.

# ? Oct 10, 2023 21:44

Wilkins Micawber: Jan 27, 2005; as we leave this existence
looking for another; Fallen Rib

drat did Triops get enshittified? That's the worst news I've heard all week. Seriously those things are great pets and tasty, too. gently caress a sea monkey.

# ? Oct 10, 2023 21:54

Bad Purchase: Jun 17, 2019

Flowers for QAnon posted:

They Arent the same size as the one on the box bro.

actually they are if you hold the box very far away, dumbass

# ? Oct 10, 2023 21:56

SolTerrasa: Sep 2, 2011

oh poo poo I think I got an offer from this company a year or two back. is this Eight Sleep? (good guess to the people who said Sleepr, lol) they said they were working on something like this when I talked to them. back then it was all remote cause of covid so I got the offer even tho I�m in Seattle.

they offered me one million earth dollars per year and then told me that actually 95% of that was going to be in equity with no liquidity and no protection from dilution. I told them I didn�t need that much money but I did want to be able to spend the money. negotiations broke down.

# ? Oct 10, 2023 21:59

BigBadSteve: Apr 29, 2009

Vim Fuego posted:

... Believe me, we've had these conversations. If you want to call it a pejorative term like DRM, then fine. Maybe this product isn't for you. But it's a project requirement that the mattress is connected when in use because of the utility of the active monitoring. That means we don't need a lot of onboard computing power because it's all done in the cloud. It's really not more sinister than that.

Vim Fuego posted:

Yes, there's a monthly fee for the active monitoring. It's not a one time cost because you're buying a product with a service, not just a big hunk of foam and springs.

You have changed my opinion, OP. You deserve to live in a car. Your scam mattress manufacturer wants to gently caress over customers, so why not also gently caress over their employees, who choose to work for them in aiding and abetting the scam.

You don't deserve any sympathy. Suffer.

# ? Oct 10, 2023 22:22

Bad Purchase: Jun 17, 2019

can the bed suck you off though? that might be a feature worth looking into

# ? Oct 10, 2023 22:29

BAGS FLY AT NOON: Apr 6, 2011; A Soft Nylon Bag

hbag posted:

what does the mattress do that an apple watch's (or fitbit, etc) sleep monitoring thing doesn't

If my Apple Watch loses WiFi I can still use it to tell time

# ? Oct 10, 2023 22:33

Roundup Ready: Mar 10, 2004; ACCIDENTAL SHIT POSTER

SolTerrasa posted:

oh poo poo I think I got an offer from this company a year or two back. is this Eight Sleep? (good guess to the people who said Sleepr, lol) they said they were working on something like this when I talked to them. back then it was all remote cause of covid so I got the offer even tho I’m in Seattle.

they offered me one million earth dollars per year and then told me that actually 95% of that was going to be in equity with no liquidity and no protection from dilution. I told them I didn’t need that much money but I did want to be able to spend the money. negotiations broke down.

if this is real and the case. I'd be worried about gas if I was working for 5% of a pie in the sky offer that will never actually happen

Like 50k ain't terrible, depending on location, but it sure as poo poo isn't worth sleeping in your car over. And 50k is like below poverty wages in a place like SV

Roundup Ready fucked around with this message at 22:37 on Oct 10, 2023

# ? Oct 10, 2023 22:34

i dunno dude: Jun 25, 2023

SolTerrasa posted:

they offered me one million earth dollars per year and then told me that actually 95% of that was going to be in equity with no liquidity and no protection from dilution.

But did OP succeed in negotiating a better offer? Please answer.

# ? Oct 10, 2023 22:39

Flowers for QAnon: May 20, 2019

I would pay extra for a bed that milks me at night, but not sure how to explain it to the wife

# ? Oct 10, 2023 22:40

ChubbyChecker: Mar 25, 2018

Flowers for QAnon posted:

I would pay extra for a bed that milks me at night, but not sure how to explain it to the wife

buy her one too

# ? Oct 10, 2023 22:43

numberoneposter: Feb 19, 2014; How much do I cum? The answer might surprise you!

this is why we need self sucking cars

err self driving i mean hehe

# ? Oct 10, 2023 22:58

SolTerrasa: Sep 2, 2011

Roundup Ready posted:

if this is real and the case. I'd be worried about gas if I was working for 5% of a pie in the sky offer that will never actually happen

Like 50k ain't terrible, depending on location, but it sure as poo poo isn't worth sleeping in your car over. And 50k is like below poverty wages in a place like SV

dug up the offer and recruiting email. it matches up pretty well. middle of 2021. i was pretty insulting to them in these emails which in retrospect I�m happy to see.

it does look like they were offering low six figures cash back then, so not really be-homeless wages, even in SV.

they never remembered to make me sign an NDA and at one point disclosed to me that their product was literally running on an arduino at the time. the founder also bragged to me about the margins because they were selling a $200 mattress manufactured in china for $4,500. the price has gone down since then, altho they do now sport an endorsement by elon musk himself.

# ? Oct 10, 2023 22:59