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speng31b
May 8, 2010

Regarde Aduck posted:

whoops, i tripped and fell into d&d and well

oh ok, don't worry they got a sixer

thats a spicy racism

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Srice
Sep 11, 2011

Regarde Aduck posted:

whoops, i tripped and fell into d&d and well

oh ok, don't worry they got a sixer

it was "weirdly racist" instead of normal racist, which demands leniency

mawarannahr
May 21, 2019

Regarde Aduck posted:

whoops, i tripped and fell into d&d and well

oh ok, don't worry they got a sixer

interesting first probe on that rap sheet

Al!
Apr 2, 2010

:coolspot::coolspot::coolspot::coolspot::coolspot:
wrong meta

H.P. Hovercraft
Jan 12, 2004

one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse
Slippery Tilde

Srice posted:

it was "weirdly racist" instead of normal racist, which demands leniency

yeah normal racist is using a variation of the n word instead

AnimeIsTrash
Jun 30, 2018


no wodner you p[ost in poppers thread, you sound like the people i work with

Judgy Fucker
Mar 24, 2006

mawarannahr posted:

interesting first probe on that rap sheet

:whitewater:

Megamissen
Jul 19, 2022

any post can be a kannapost
if you want it to be




im feeling left out

DaysBefore
Jan 24, 2019

Vox Nihili posted:

I don't like that at all

Mr Hootington
Jul 24, 2008

I'M HAVING A HOOT EATING CORNETTE THE LONG WAY
Racism seems to be good now.

DaysBefore
Jan 24, 2019

Always was grandpa. Racism, being a chud, these are some of the extremely win things that make posting good

Feels Villeneuve
Oct 7, 2007

Setter is Better.

Mr Hootington posted:

Racism seems to be good now.

Looking into this.

KirbyKhan
Mar 20, 2009



Soiled Meat

Mr Hootington posted:

Racism seems to be good now.

Just a fad, I'll pass

Cuttlefush
Jan 15, 2014

gotta have my purp

really queer Christmas posted:

It's time to ban all finns from the website. This includes finn lites like swedes, Danes, and balts.

everyone on the internet is a secret finn. we finally caught the last normal. let's get em, uh, kaverits?

Feels Villeneuve
Oct 7, 2007

Setter is Better.
The Finns are passe. We are in the era of Dutch racism.

Cuttlefush
Jan 15, 2014

gotta have my purp

AnimeIsTrash posted:

no wodner you p[ost in poppers thread, you sound like the people i work with

cspam all livse in seattle and works in the amazon ball together on one big computer

AnimeIsTrash
Jun 30, 2018

HolePisser1982 posted:

dying laughing. and then that Dumb Lowtax/Happy Thread guy earnestly emptyquoting it. awesome

quote:

Okay, since things can get hairy, I'm going to give you my tactics nerd side and list the 36 Strategems, which might be able to help anyone going to a protest with some tips for deception and planning and stuff.

Strategems When Commanding Superiority
1. Deceive the heavens and cross the ocean: Mask your real goals with a fake goal until your aims are achieved; the enemy will be so annoyed with the constant false alarms that they will ignore you once you make your real move. (This rule is also used as a Chinese idiom for "to pull the wool over someone's eyes".)
2. Besiege Wei to rescue Zhao: Avoid a head-on battle with a strong enemy, and instead strike at his weakness (for example, a weaker ally) elsewhere. The name came from Qi forcing Wei's army to retreat from laying siege to Zhao's capital by laying siege to Wei's capital in 354-353BC.
3. Kill With a Borrowed Knife: Cause damage to the enemy by getting a third party to do the deed or causing an Enemy Civil War.
4. Substitute Leisure for Labor: Have your troops well-prepared for battle, in the same time that the enemy is rushing to fight against you, ideally resulting in their exhausted troops running into your fresh soldiers on the terms of your choosing.
5. Loot a Burning House: The best time to attack an opponent is when they have their own problems to deal with. Though he who loots a burning house should be careful lest he becomes trapped inside.
6. Clamor in the East, Attack in the West: Get the enemy to focus his forces elsewhere, and then attack a position that would be weakly defended.

Stratagems for Confrontation
7. Create Something from Nothing: Make somebody believe there was something when there is in fact nothing, or vice versa (i.e. lie like a rug). The general idea is that having fallen for a trick once or twice, an enemy will be unwilling to fall for your trick a third time - so that's when you should actually attack.
8. Openly Repair the Walkway, but Sneak through the passage of Chencang: Deceive the enemy with an obvious approach that will take a very long time, while surprising him by taking a shortcut and sneaking upon him. Another interpretation is the Kansas City Shuffle — Distract the enemy with an "obvious" attempt at deception in order to conceal yet another ploy from their attention. The name originated from a real-life example during the Chu-Han War around 200 B.C. At that time, Liu Bang is preparing to mobilize his army from modern-day Chengdu and the only way to access the rest of the area is a Walkway they burned several years earlier to prevent any invasion. Xiang Yu send his forces to the other side of the passage so that they are ready to face them as soon as the construction is completed. However, the repairing is a ploy to lure Xiang Yu's attention and he took a difficult route to unguarded Chencang, thereby preventing a premature annihilation of his army.
9. Observe the Fire from the Opposite Shore, or Sit on the Mountain and Watch the Tigers Fight: Delay entering the field of battle until all the other players have become exhausted fighting amongst themselves, then go in at full strength and pick up the pieces.
10. Hide a Knife behind a Smile: Charm and endear yourself to your enemy. When you have gained his trust, move against him in secret. (This rule is also used as a Chinese idiom for someone who constantly betrays others.)
11. Sacrifice the Plum Tree to Preserve the Peach Tree: Sacrifice short-term objectives in order to gain the long-term goal. (Peaches are associated with immortality; see eg. Journey to the West.)
12. Take the Opportunity to Pilfer a Goat: While carrying out your plans, be flexible enough to take advantage of any opportunity that presents itself, however small, and avail yourself of any profit, however slight. (This is also used as an idiom for stealing from the till or the five-finger discount.)

Stratagems for Attack
13. Beat the Grass to Startle the Snake: Do something without aim, but make it so spectacular to provoke a response of the enemy, thereby giving away his plans or position, or just taunt him. Do something unusual, strange, and unexpected as this will arouse the enemy's suspicion and disrupt his thinking. However, an imprudent act will give your position or intentions away to the enemy.
14. Borrow a Corpse to Resurrect the Soul: Revive something from the past by giving it a new purpose, or reinterpret it to your advantage.
15. Lure the Tiger Down From the Mountain: Lure an opponent away from his field of advantage, thus separating him from his source of strength.
16. To Catch Something, First Set it Free: Cornered prey will often mount a final desperation attack; to prevent this, you let the enemy believe he still has a chance for freedom. May also take the form of a Trick-and-Follow Ploy, where letting an enemy go and observing their subsequent actions may give you more information about their capabilities and intentions.
17. Toss out a Brick to attract Jade: Bait someone by making him believe he gains something or just make him react to it and obtain something valuable from him in return.
18. To Capture the Bandits, capture their Leader: If the enemy's army is strong but is allied to the commander only by money or threats, then take aim at the leader; the rest of the army will disperse or come over to your side. If, however, they are allied to the leader through loyalty, then beware, the army can continue to fight on after his death out of vengeance.

Stratagems for Confused Situations
19. Steal the Firewood from under the Pot: Take out the leading argument or asset of your target, denying your enemy the resources needed to oppose you.
20. Stir up the Waters to catch a Fish: Create confusion and use this confusion to further your own goals.
21. Slough off the Cicada's Golden Shell: Create an illusion to fit your goals and distract others. (A secondary meaning for this rule would be Faking the Dead.)
22. Shut the Door to catch the Thief: If you have the chance to completely capture the enemy then you should do so, thereby bringing the battle or war to a quick and lasting conclusion.
23. Befriend a Distant State while attacking a Neighbour: When you are the strongest in one field, your greatest threat is from the second strongest in your field, not the strongest from another field, and thus the distant neighbor will make a good ally, however temporary.
24. Obtain Safe Passage to conquer the state of Guo: Borrow the resources of an ally to attack a common enemy. Once the enemy is defeated, use those resources to turn on the ally that lent you them in the first place. This comes from Jin's conquest of the states of Guo and Yu by bribing Yu's ruler to obtain a safe passage for Jin forces to conquer Guo in 658BC. Without Guo's protection, Yu was in turn conquered by Jin in 655BC.

Stratagems for Gaining Ground
25. Replace the Beams with Rotten Timbers: Disrupt the enemy's formations, interfere with their methods of operations, change the rules which they are used to following, go contrary to their standard training.
26. Point at the Mulberry tree, but curse the Locust: To discipline, control, or warn others whose status or position excludes them from direct confrontation; use analogy and innuendo. Without directly naming names, those accused cannot retaliate without revealing their complicity.
27. Feign Madness but Keep your Balance: Hide behind the mask of a fool, a drunk, or a madman to create confusion about your intentions and motivations.
28. Lure them onto the Roof, then take away the Ladder: With baits and deceptions, lure your enemy into treacherous terrain, then cut off his lines of communication and avenue of escape; to save himself, he must fight both your own forces and the elements of nature.
29. Deck the Tree with False Blossoms: Through the use of artifice and disguise, make something of no value appear valuable; of no threat appear dangerous; of no use appear useful.
30. Exchange the roles of Host and Guest: Usurp leadership in a situation where you are normally subordinate. Infiltrate your target. Initially, pretend to be a guest to be accepted, but develop from inside and become the owner later.

Stratagems for Desperate Straits
31. The Beauty Trap: Send your enemy beautiful women to cause discord within his camp. This strategy can work on three levels: First, the ruler becomes so enamored with the beauty that he neglects his duties and allows his vigilance to wane; second, other males at court will begin to display aggressive behavior that inflames minor differences hindering co-operation and destroying morale; third, other females at court, motivated by jealousy and envy, begin to plot intrigues, further exacerbating the situation.
32. The Empty Fort Strategy: When the enemy is superior in numbers and your situation is such that you expect to be overrun at any moment, then drop all pretense of military preparedness and act calmly so that the enemy will think you have hidden reserves and want to trap them into the fort.
33. Let the Enemy's own spy sow discord in the Enemy camp: Undermine your enemy's intelligence-gathering abilities by using his own spies against him or planting your own agents among his.
34. Injure yourself to gain the Enemy's trust: Pretending to be injured has two possible applications. In the first, the enemy is lulled into relaxing his guard since he no longer considers you to be an immediate threat. The second is a way of endearing yourself to your enemy by pretending the injury was caused by a mutual enemy.
35. Chain Stratagems: In important matters, one should use several stratagems applied simultaneously after another as in a chain of stratagems. Keep different plans operating in an overall scheme; however, in this manner if any one strategy fails, then the chain breaks and the whole scheme fails.
36. If all else fails, Retreat: The best battle is one fought with your side never having to mobilize, but if it becomes obvious that your current course of action will lead to defeat, then retreat and regroup. Probably the most famous of all the stratagems, to the point that the phrase 'Stratagem 36' in Chinese parlance is equivalent to 'get out of Dodge' in American colloquialism.

lmfao, lobster bring back the cool zone

Mr Hootington
Jul 24, 2008

I'M HAVING A HOOT EATING CORNETTE THE LONG WAY
I wonder how many cringe posts I have in the coolzone

Cuttlefush
Jan 15, 2014

gotta have my purp
the mods and admins have been keeping it for themselves to lol at. we should be able to lol at it too. we need justice

aw frig aw dang it
Jun 1, 2018


AnimeIsTrash posted:

lmfao, lobster bring back the cool zone

Junpeh

lumpentroll
Mar 4, 2020

KirbyKhan
Mar 20, 2009



Soiled Meat

Mr Hootington posted:

I wonder how many cringe posts I have in the coolzone

I'm thinking about George Floyd summer when that thread popped off. Not thrilled to see how milqtoast I actually was.

AnimeIsTrash
Jun 30, 2018

19. Steal the Firewood from under the Pot: Take out the leading argument or asset of your target, denying your enemy the resources needed to oppose you.

Cuttlefush
Jan 15, 2014

gotta have my purp
that's an ikdea furniture guide

tristeham
Jul 31, 2022

aw frig aw dang it posted:

Location: Finland

harden your heart, putin

Sherbert Hoover
Dec 12, 2019

Working hard, thank you!

i wonder if he ever read a book

ram dass in hell
Dec 29, 2019



:420::toot::420:

Mr Hootington posted:

Racism seems to be good now.
/

16-bit Butt-Head
Dec 25, 2014

the cool zone must be unearthed

Zodium
Jun 19, 2004

16-bit Butt-Head posted:

the cool zone must be unearthed

HashtagGirlboss
Jan 4, 2005

Leave it buried, I say, for a friend an not because


Mr Hootington posted:

I wonder how many cringe posts I have in the coolzone

16-bit Butt-Head
Dec 25, 2014

if you made cringe posts they must be seen

err
Apr 11, 2005

I carry my own weight no matter how heavy this shit gets...

AnimeIsTrash posted:

lmfao, lobster bring back the cool zone

that guy was like 16 iirc

16-bit Butt-Head
Dec 25, 2014

err posted:

that guy was like 16 iirc

16 year olds shouldnt write posts that long

Cuttlefush
Jan 15, 2014

gotta have my purp

16-bit Butt-Head posted:

the cool zone must be unearthed

the cool zone is the book of the dead and the admins are guarding it. if it is read it will summon back all the permabanned posters and their 6 plagues

AnimeIsTrash
Jun 30, 2018

err posted:

that guy was like 16 iirc

no he wasnt

16-bit Butt-Head
Dec 25, 2014

Cuttlefush posted:

the cool zone is the book of the dead and the admins are guarding it. if it is read it will summon back all the permabanned posters and their 6 plagues

sounds like it would be funny if that happened i want to see the plagues

HashtagGirlboss
Jan 4, 2005

err posted:

that guy was like 16 iirc

Lol yeah the 16 year old who posts decade old tumblr memes definitely wasn’t a really weird but

aw frig aw dang it
Jun 1, 2018


err posted:

that guy was like 16 iirc

kids should go play outside imo

Cuttlefush
Jan 15, 2014

gotta have my purp

16-bit Butt-Head posted:

sounds like it would be funny if that happened i want to see the plagues

yep. absolutely. we deserve to read from the book and see the plagues

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16-bit Butt-Head
Dec 25, 2014

HashtagGirlboss posted:

Lol yeah the 16 year old who posts decade old tumblr memes definitely wasn’t a really weird but

he was 16, spiritually and mentally

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