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It almost pains me to do this because the Daredevil character kicks rear end, but this movie is a turd; not a pile of poo poo like you might be thinking, but more along the lines of a two-flush corn log. One thing you should always be able to count on in a comic book movie is a bad guy who kicks rear end. In this movie we get a character called "Bullseye." Guess what he has on his forehead? A bull's-eye. Guess what his special power is? He can throw darts and hit bull's-eyes. That's stupid. Why not have a character called "The Raging Hardon" where the character is a boner, or a heroine called "Salad Tosser" where she, um.. tosses salad. If you're going for stupid, why not go all out? This has seriously got to be the dumbest "bad guy" in a movie since the gimpy dude from Panic Room (that dog poo poo movie with the obnoxious bigender kid and her mom, played by Jodie Foster, where they spend the whole two-hour duration of the movie hiding from a limping cripple... ooh the suspense). The main bad guy in the movie was Kingpin, played by Michael Clarke Duncan. Am I the only one who thinks this guy looks too friendly to be a bad guy? Every time he came near Daredevil in the movie, it looked like he was going to give him a sloppy kiss. These "minor" issues aside though, the movie mostly blows. They spent all of 3 minutes on Daredevil's background, 45 minutes on a stupid fight scene between Daredevil and some random chick who was introduced so abruptly that she might as well have landed in the scene with a parachute. Then there was a 20 minute bar scene where Daredevil fights another random guy who had nothing to do with the rest of the movie. Next thing you know Daredevil and the random chick were humping, some guy gets killed and then the movie ends. BORING. What they really need to do is make a movie about the greatest comic book character of all time: Lobo. Lobo: 1, Santa: 0 Not many people are familiar with Lobo because most people are lame and can't comprehend how much rear end Lobo kicks. For example, the cover on the right depicts Lobo (also known as "the main man") kicking Santa's rear end. Santa did something to piss Lobo off (or nothing, it makes no difference), and Lobo RUINED HIS poo poo. Lobo is a mean son of a bitch and doesn't take poo poo from anyone. If they made a movie about Lobo, it would start out with Lobo just sitting around looking at porn and minding his own business when some lame-rear end comes by and starts nerding all over the place. Lobo takes his knife out and disembowels the guy while he's just standing there. The guy would start screaming because he's a pussy, then Lobo would reach down and rip the guy's lungs out. The rest of the movie would be mostly filled with Lobo wiping out villages of people, yelling at hospital patients and head-butting mimes. Lobo could kick any superhero's rear end and it's high time he had his own movie. Lobo versus Daredevil? Oh yeah, so back to Daredevil. The movie is loosely pieced together, there are no transitions and the bad guys suck. Avoid unless you're a comic book movie fan, and even then, only if you're a fat comic book movie fan to be on the safe side. 846,368 people saw Daredevil and agree: Lobo could kick his rear end.
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# ? Oct 29, 2023 23:09 |
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# ? May 26, 2024 09:59 |
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He's so good at this
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# ? Oct 29, 2023 23:58 |
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 02:48 |
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 03:23 |
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Yiff in hell
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 03:32 |
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 03:48 |
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https://twitter.com/AllAroundEd/status/1718537627731714365?s=20
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 04:27 |
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hes so good
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 04:33 |
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XuhXohBP-74
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 07:04 |
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this takes beating yourself off to a whole new level
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 10:10 |
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https://twitter.com/elonconomy/status/1712883967119315020
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 15:19 |
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 16:51 |
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He's so old, he doesn't even know Amazon exists, lol.
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 16:58 |
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So the Jenny Jones show has finally been canceled after 12 long seasons. I say: it's about drat time. I hesitate to use the word "trashy" to describe her show, because to call her show trashy would be an insult to truly trashy television. The Jenny Jones show is to television what Cheez Whiz is to food. I can't stress enough how lovely this show is. If trashy television was a video game, The Jenny Jones show would be the final boss. I made a decision about three years ago to stop watching her show entirely because it was pissing me off way too much. I watched it again the other day and nothing has changed. Every show can be summarized in one of the three following categories: 1. Some lardass loses weight, and now she thinks she's "THE BOMB." So she comes out parading her fatass off to everyone in the skimpiest outfit she can find. Nevermind that every other Jenny Jones show focuses on people who "dress too sexy" (in which the audience boos and sneers when they display the before picture, which means that they're no better than the people they criticize), hypocrisy is kosher when it's an ex-fatass who wants her 15 minutes. News flash: nobody cares. What do they want, a reward? They bring the weight upon themselves, then they lose it and expect everyone to throw them a ticker-tape parade for losing what they gained. Way to piss away your 15 minutes you moron. That's another thing, the phrase "everyone gets 15 minutes of fame" is bullshit. Not everyone can get 15 minutes of fame. The earth's population is about 6 billion. At 15 minutes per person, that amounts to over 171,000 years we'd have to spend just sitting around watching people be "famous." To hell with that. As for the other two categories, I was just kidding: there are none. Every Jenny Jones show is like the one above, with various permutations of the following rhyming words: "geek, chic, teen, obscene, hot, not, mom, bomb" and many others. I've gone through the trouble of translating a few choice show topics to give you a brief synopsis of each: Your Teasing Was Cruel But Now My Looks Rule! Translation: I was an ugly skank in high school, and now that I've changed my appearance to conform to the media's perception of what's "hot," I'm no longer an ugly skank. Now I'm a shallow skank! You Said I Had No Skills, But Now My Looks & Talent Pays The Bills! Translation: Raunchy hags and semi-hookers. Notice how they stealthily snuck the word "talent" into the title to make it seem like a legitimate topic. I have to admit, I totally didn't notice that they were glorifying prostitution since they used "talent" in the topic along with "looks." Otherwise I would have totally changed the channel if I found out it was a talk show about stupid slutty chicks who exploited their bodies to get on television. I Got Mad Player Skills Because My Big Chest Gives All The Men Thrills! Translation: I should be shot for using the phrase "mad player skills." You May Shake It For Money, But Leave Those Sexy Clothes At The Club, Honey! Translation: Another lame excuse to have another stupid show devoted to make overs. I have to admit though, the topic is pretty clever and sassy. Speaking of sassy, I thought of an alternative title for this episode: this talk show host has a lot of sass, too bad her head is up her rear end! I'm America's Hottest Honey, You'll See, No Other Babe Is Finer Than Me! Translation: This one is my favorite because it's a broken sounding rhyme. They didn't even go for the obvious "I'm America's hottest honey, nobody else is quite as money." This episode answers the question that people are dying to find out once and for all: who is America's hottest honey? The show I watched the other day was about 11 and 12 year old kids who smoke, do drugs, and drink. It was so stupid I almost had a heart attack. They had some 11 year old girl on there who liked to dress sexy, then Jenny Jones being the impartial host that she is, asked the girl questions that everybody wanted to know: "why are you doing it"? I guess Jenny forgot that it doesn't matter why 11 year olds do anything, because they're, get this, 11. The bovine-like mother just sat back nodding her head saying "I can't control her! I've tried everything!" Yeah? Well have you tried GROWING SOME BALLS AND STOMPING YOUR LITTLE poo poo INTO SUBMISSION, YOU DUMB BITCH? She's 11 years old. Do something about it. Holy poo poo people are stupid. Why is this on TV? Thank you Jenny Jones for your years of glorifying parents who have "out of control teens" and encouraging stupid kids with bad attitudes by putting them on television. So long Jenny, your show won't be missed. 634,299 People wonder if Jenny Jones can come up with a topic that rhymes with "canceled."
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 17:01 |
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i'd like to see this Maddox fellow stick it to that 78 year old book store owner!
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 17:02 |
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https://twitter.com/EduardHabsburg/status/1718972193441239197
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 17:10 |
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of course the guy calling japanese people pagans in 2023 is a hapsburg. someone tell him it did not in fact have to be smuggled onto a gunship
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 17:23 |
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How many of those Olds also own their own boutique small business and how many are getting minimum wage at wallmart?
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 17:25 |
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tokin opposition posted:How many of those Olds also own their own boutique small business and how many are getting minimum wage at wallmart? based on mainstream media interviews, 100% are small business owners.
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 17:31 |
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0uZo86Mfd3c
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 17:36 |
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mental illness
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 17:39 |
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Ben Nerevarine posted:mental illness Big talk from a furry avatar haver
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 17:42 |
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tarkovsky ftw
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 17:52 |
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Wait the country is called yiffrael? That's like naming the country fuckrael. And the president is just named Biden? Bowdin was right there. Dude needs to work on his silly names.
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 18:09 |
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Koishi Komeiji posted:Wait the country is called yiffrael? That's like naming the country fuckrael. And the president is just named Biden? Bowdin was right there. Dude needs to work on his silly names. So was Bite’n like his dog or Bitten like the secret service agents.
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 18:26 |
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tokin opposition posted:Big talk from a furry avatar haver
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 18:28 |
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orcs are furries now dwi
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 18:29 |
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bring back pig faced orcs imo
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 18:32 |
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who is outside my canton screaming yiff. I will never yiff.
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 18:32 |
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Koishi Komeiji posted:Wait the country is called yiffrael? That's like naming the country fuckrael. And the president is just named Biden? Bowdin was right there. Dude needs to work on his silly names. In that reality Biden is still just Biden. He’s the only regular guy.
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 18:34 |
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Sorry do you prefer scalie?
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 18:34 |
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Gripweed posted:In that reality Biden is still just Biden. He’s the only regular guy. We all know which biden it is
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 18:35 |
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Gripweed posted:In that reality Biden is still just Biden. He’s the only regular guy. so is the fantasy to be biden, who fucks all the dogs, or to be one of the many dogs biden fucks?
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 18:36 |
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the anime-brained degenerate defender has logged on
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 18:36 |
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gimme the GOD drat candy posted:so is the fantasy to be biden, who fucks all the dogs, or to be one of the many dogs biden fucks? Man I’m not the one to ask about this
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 18:38 |
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Ben Nerevarine posted:the anime-brained degenerate defender has logged on You don't need to announce yourself entering a room you're not the furry queen
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 18:39 |
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canonically orcs are actually elves that were cursed by a daedra
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 18:40 |
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Al! posted:canonically orcs are actually elves that were cursed by a daedra No, they were created by The Old Ones to fight the C’tan.
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 18:47 |
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https://twitter.com/danielmkovalik/status/1718771288628732232 FETTER-MEN, TO ME!
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 19:06 |
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# ? May 26, 2024 09:59 |
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fetterman's undercovers are also dudes in hoodies and gym shorts
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# ? Oct 30, 2023 19:19 |