r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

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sinnesloeschen: Jun 4, 2011; fiiiiiiinnnne

DreamingofRoses posted:

How do I (36F) get my husband (36M) to stop cooking?

100 per cent motherfuck anyone who doesnt clean up after themselves. NTA

# ? Nov 14, 2023 19:56

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# ? May 14, 2024 14:58

kimbo305: Jun 9, 2007; actually, yeah, I am a little mad

[working through the backlog]

FMguru posted:

AITAH for not inviting my dad and stepmom to my wedding?

I (28F) am engaged to my fianc�e Dave (28M).
my fianc�
my fianc�e was doing all the talking.
My fianc�e just kind of looked at me
my fianc�e

# ? Nov 14, 2023 20:09

StrangersInTheNight: Dec 31, 2007; ABSOLUTE FUCKING GUDGEON

Halloween Jack posted:

"Just Google it"

Yes actually. To turn another leftie phrase back atcha - no one has a duty to educate you.

Glad you finally understand

StrangersInTheNight fucked around with this message at 20:17 on Nov 14, 2023

# ? Nov 14, 2023 20:15

Pope Corky the IX: Dec 18, 2006; What are you looking at?

You couldn't have left it on the previous page after everyone else had moved on?

# ? Nov 14, 2023 20:17

EIDE Van Hagar: Dec 8, 2000; Beep Boop

i subscribe to the �if you cook i clean up and t�other way �round� rule.

# ? Nov 14, 2023 20:17

InediblePenguin: Sep 27, 2004; I'm strong. And a giant penguin. Please don't eat me. No, really. Don't try.

Ok i just DID do a shitload of googling and while most states don't let foster kids share with kids of THE OPPOSITE SEX i still haven't found a single state that forbids a ten year old to lodge with another minor child over age 14 of the same sex but would be fine with a 14 year old, maybe you can find one and link us the relevant statutes!

# ? Nov 14, 2023 20:19

Pope Corky the IX: Dec 18, 2006; What are you looking at?

Or maybe we could just drop it now that people are being lovely to one another. Not to mention that every update takes it further into a horribly depressing situation with no good answers or solutions.

# ? Nov 14, 2023 20:25

Big Bowie Bonanza: Dec 30, 2007; please tell me where i can date this cute boy

As someone who does a lot of the cooking in my relationship I don�t really understand why you can�t clean as you go tbh it�s so much better than having a huge pile of poo poo and what are you doing while different things are cooking anyhow. My gf and I both just cook and clean.

# ? Nov 14, 2023 20:25

thepopmonster: Feb 18, 2014

Tenebrais posted:

If you're going to masticate do it quietly

It's hard to do with the clinking sounds that accompany those motions.

# ? Nov 14, 2023 20:26

Captain Hygiene: Sep 17, 2007; You mess with the crabbo...

AITA for calling my friend “whipped?”

quote:

My buddy Charlie and I have been best friends since elementary school. We text every day, send each other memes. And other dude stuff. We are both 25

A year and a half ago he met this girl online named Grace. They dress the same, have similar interests, and seemed like a good fit. Here’s the thing. I love Charlie, but he’s always been a submissive dude who kind of puts up with way more bs than he should. For example, he chased this girl for years who treated him like poo poo. And just has issues with confrontation. So it’s not hard to see how he can be controlled easily.

Grace doesn’t seem bad. From what I’ve seen. But our friends don’t really “know” her. Before her, all of us would hang out all the time. Play video games, watch football, say stupid poo poo, and hang out. Sometimes she’ll come but not speak much. Now they live together 40 min away, and we see him like once every 1.5 weeks or so.

He went from living with his parents like us, to living at her place and now I get the sense that he thinks he’s better than us. But I think Grace is controlling and obsessed with making him mature and starting to pay his own way just because she’s struggled in life from what he’s said.

I ask “Wanna get food?” He says: “Can’t I have plans to take Grace out for our _____ anniversary” And it’s some bs thing they’re celebrating. I called him whipped and he keeps telling me that HES the one who’s a romantic and sentimental. And then implies that we are jealous because we don’t have girls.

That’s not true. It’s just you don’t abandon your friends when you meet somebody new. We can tell he’s extremely obsessed with her and never stops talking about her 24/7. “Grace and I did this” Grace likes that. It’s like ok bro we get it. Grace never makes any effort to hang out with us. But he hangs with her friends and “has a good time”

"Grace this", "Grace that", it's like you care more about the partner you moved away to live with than our videogame fun time :qq:

# ? Nov 14, 2023 20:27

Donkringel: Apr 22, 2008

DreamingofRoses posted:

How can I (28f) ask my autistic boyfriend (33m) to break up with me in a respectful way?

Fixed formatting.

I'm of the mindset that a person can discontinue a relationship at any time and I applaud the boyfriend's caveat of "if they have something big come up, hold off until after it is over."

Hell I've been on the receiving end of that. My college GF called me while I was at a Christmas Eve party and said she had something important to talk about with me and it needed to happen now. I go over to her place and she breaks up with me on Christmas Eve at 1030pm.

Stupidly we got back together and I told her it was pretty crummy of her to break up with me on Christmas Eve and if we do break up please don't do it before an important event like my birthday or during final exams or something.

Anyway so two days before my birthday she shows up at my house and breaks up with me.

I was pretty sad at that happening but now many years after the fact I get to have a Seinfeld-esque gripe I can trot out.

"It was Christmas Eve Jerry! Two hours before midnight! She broke up with me! It wasn't working out!"

"Christmas Eve? Well that doesn't feel like the Holiday spirit at all."

"Well it wasn't her Holiday spirit, she's Jewish. Hanukkah had ended, so she just got a little mixed up on what important event to wait for."

# ? Nov 14, 2023 20:27

The_Franz: Aug 8, 2003

DreamingofRoses posted:

How do I (36F) get my husband (36M) to stop cooking?

On one hand, having someone hovering over you while you are trying to learn and figure things out for yourself is annoying. On the other, grease fires are dangerous, and leaving messes for someone else to clean up is just being a jerk.

# ? Nov 14, 2023 20:27

Brimstone Inquiry: Jan 21, 2007

Cowslips Warren posted:

WIBTA if I asked my sister not to wear earings to my wedding?

How ... How boring is your wedding going to be if earrings are going to take the spotlight off of you?

Clip-ons, magnets, glue-ons... I feel she is not exploring all of her (admittedly inferior to Flesh-In-Needle Supremacy) options!

# ? Nov 14, 2023 20:36

Pope Corky the IX: Dec 18, 2006; What are you looking at?

Captain Hygiene posted:

AITA for calling my friend “whipped?”

I like that every activity he expects Grace to join in on takes place in the basement of someone's parents' house.

# ? Nov 14, 2023 20:40

Baronjutter: Dec 31, 2007; "Tiny Trains"

Help, my crab pot group of failed to launch nerds has one of its members climbing out. How can we all drag him back down and let him know he's whipped???

# ? Nov 14, 2023 20:44

wheatpuppy: Apr 25, 2008; YOU HAVE MY POST!

Baronjutter posted:

Help, my crab pot group of failed to launch nerds has one of its members climbing out. How can we all drag him back down and let him know he's whipped???

"It's like he thinks he's better than us just because he has a home and someone who loves him and good friends and other hobbies."

# ? Nov 14, 2023 20:46

Pope Corky the IX: Dec 18, 2006; What are you looking at?

I feel like "say stupid poo poo" is doing a lot of heavy lifting considering Grace doesn't feel like coming around.

# ? Nov 14, 2023 20:49

Halloween Jack: Sep 12, 2003; I WILL CUT OFF BOTH OF MY ARMS BEFORE I VOTE FOR ANYONE THAT IS MORE POPULAR THAN BERNIE!!!!!

Cowslips Warren posted:

WIBTA if I asked my sister not to wear earings to my wedding?

How ... How boring is your wedding going to be if earrings are going to take the spotlight off of you?

She has two...TWO! earrings in each ear. It's all anyone will be able to talk about.

(The bride has Boomer Brain. Maybe not a terminal case if they act quickly.)

# ? Nov 14, 2023 20:54

FMguru: Sep 10, 2003; peed on;
sexually

A variation on a thread favorite, the teenager who pulls a houdini act on their parents for their 18th birthday.

AITA for beating my parents to the chase and moving out in the middle of the night?

quote:

I (18f) overheard conversations with my mom and my dad (39f and 40m) about how they planned to kick me out shortly after my eighteenth birthday. The way they were talking about it seemed like they were dead serious and the way it was brought up multiple times made it seem like they were going to kick me out too.

So, I decided that I wouldn't give them the chance to kick me out and made plans with my friend "Riley" (17f) to stay at her place until I graduated and moved into a college dorm or had an apartment of my own. Riley's parents were horrified by at the thought my parents would kick me out the second I turned eighteen and agreed to let me stay at their place as long as I graduated high school.

Riley, her parents, and my boyfriend "Cole" (18m) came after midnight to help me take my belongings to their car and drive me to Riley's house.

My parents woke up in the middle of this, and asked me what the hell was going. I kinda shrugged and told them that I was moving out before they could kick me out. My parents tried to deny this, and attempted to stop me from leaving but there was nothing that they could do since I'm a legal adult.

( By the way, I wasn't just going to leave in the middle of the night without any goodbye, I already put a note on the kitchen table where my mom goes to first in the morning, explaining what happened.)

Right now, I'm at Riley's house in their spare bedroom, and I've gotten bombarded with calls from my parents asking me to come back and not to tell my grandparents about this.

In one text, my mom called me an ungrateful bitch for leaving in the middle of the night, and that she should've kicked me out sooner.

LOL at that last line. OP should forward that text to their grandparents.

# ? Nov 14, 2023 20:54

haveblue: Aug 15, 2005; Toilet Rascal

quote:

And then implies that we are jealous because we don�t have girls.

That�s not true.

Which part

# ? Nov 14, 2023 20:59

Upgrade: Jun 19, 2021

r/relationships: This will be helpful! It has not been helpful.

# ? Nov 14, 2023 21:11

Arsenic Lupin: Apr 12, 2012; This particularly rapid💨 unintelligible 😖patter💁 isn't generally heard🧏‍♂️, and if it is🤔, it doesn't matter💁.

Cowslips Warren posted:

WIBTA if I asked my sister not to wear earings to my wedding?

How ... How boring is your wedding going to be if earrings are going to take the spotlight off of you?

Another post by OP, from r/Christianity
How to stop making everything a competition

quote:

I 21(f) always try to be the best at everything to help me feel like the best. This is especially with my sisters lol. I always try to be the prettiest, the smartest, the most popular and the best Christian. For example me and my sisters always had long hair but my sisters now is mid-length but I will never cut mine much so I will be the prettiest and get the most complements lol. I always feel so proud that my hair isn't as short as other girls. One girl from my cu called Katie who is a bit u fortunate looking grew her hair long from a bob she was on a gap year and n ow irs longer than mine. Its not fair I want to get her to cut it again. Her friend visited at the weekend to visit her unfortunately looking boyfriend and complemented her hair growth this made me angry as people havnt said anything about my hair. I'm sad my you get sister has a prettier face than me and is skinnier and has more instagram followers. It make me happy when I get roles like being on the christian union committee I am om my 3rd year which is more than everyone else lol. This makes me feel eater than everyone. I know this is a sin so how can my heart be changed haha?

This woman is not mature enough to marry.

# ? Nov 14, 2023 21:12

Pope Corky the IX: Dec 18, 2006; What are you looking at?

It seems like she suffered a minor stroke halfway through that paragraph.

# ? Nov 14, 2023 21:17

Arsenic Lupin: Apr 12, 2012; This particularly rapid💨 unintelligible 😖patter💁 isn't generally heard🧏‍♂️, and if it is🤔, it doesn't matter💁.

Pope Corky the IX posted:

It seems like she suffered a minor stroke halfway through that paragraph.

She was somewhere around Barstow on the edge of the desert ...

# ? Nov 14, 2023 21:24

CitizenKain: May 27, 2001; That was Gary Cooper, asshole.; Nap Ghost

Arsenic Lupin posted:

Another post by OP, from r/Christianity
How to stop making everything a competition

This woman is not mature enough to marry.

I kinda think trying to be the "best Christian" is missing the point a little.

# ? Nov 14, 2023 21:38

EIDE Van Hagar: Dec 8, 2000; Beep Boop

Halloween Jack posted:

She has two...TWO! earrings in each ear. It's all anyone will be able to talk about.

(The bride has Boomer Brain. Maybe not a terminal case if they act quickly.)

they have a bunch of insane posts in r/christianity worried about an acquaintance who likes taylor swift and only murders in the building, in which OP compares liking those two normal pop culture things with idolatry. there is no hope for them.

# ? Nov 14, 2023 21:40

Vim Fuego: Jun 1, 2000; I LITERALLY SLEEP IN A RACING CAR. DO YOU?
p.s. ask me about my subscription mattress; Ultra Carp

Captain Hygiene posted:

That feels like a bizarre midpoint between keeping either completely empty boxes or sealed unopened boxes. I don't know how you could actually care enough to collect them if you're just dumping them on a desk full of cereal crumbs.

Actually it gets weirder the more I think about it, where on earth is she getting so many 30 year old cereal boxes full of leftover crumbs in the first place?

She's a time traveler and also a gigantic weirdo

# ? Nov 14, 2023 21:51

Big Mac: Jan 3, 2007

Arsenic Lupin posted:

Another post by OP, from r/Christianity
How to stop making everything a competition

This woman is not mature enough to marry.

I feel like I'm always making some progress on a Grand Unified Theory of r/relationships, and then a post like this comes up and I have to start over

# ? Nov 14, 2023 21:58

Fatty: Sep 13, 2004; Not really fat

She's incredible

quote:

I have an an 1st class degree in Welsh and music

Song I am writing

quote:

Hi I 21(f) am getting into writing biblical songs. I am writing one about John the baptised. Here it is so

John the Baptist, a voice in the wilderness, John the Baptist, oh John the Baptist oooo yeahh Baptizing with water, repentance his call, John the Baptist, oh John the Baptist ooooo yeahhh Pointing to Jesus, the Savior of all.

Jesus the savoir of all John is his mate and all, But Jesus is the only one, Yeah Jesus is the only one who can saveeee Yeah ooo yeahhh Jesus is the only one who can save

If you have any feedback let me know as I want to perform this song at my wedding if it is ready in time. Thank you

# ? Nov 14, 2023 22:08

Pope Corky the IX: Dec 18, 2006; What are you looking at?

I will gift a platinum account or new avatar to whoever records themselves singing that song. With or without an instrument or backing track.

# ? Nov 14, 2023 22:12

Upgrade: Jun 19, 2021

Ooooh yeaahhh pointing to Jesus

# ? Nov 14, 2023 22:14

Cowslips Warren: Oct 29, 2005; What use had they for tricks and cunning, living in the enemy's warren and paying his price?; Grimey Drawer

Anyone else getting strong Kanye vibes from that song?

AITA for laughing that my adult coworker plays recorder and calling her pretentious?

quote:

Okay, here�s the thing, I (f33) started new work recently. The team is fairly small and they�re all very close and are friends out of work. One of my coworkers, Amy (f33) recently moved house and she had a housewarming party last weekend to which she invited me.

I was excited to go and hopefully make new friends (her other friends were also going to be there) as I recently broke up with someone and moved to a different city.

Nothing much happened at first, then I noticed a few recorders in the room and asked Amy if she had kids and if they were learning to play. And she said no, that she played. I genuinely laughed because it was so ridiculous, an adult playing recorders. I asked her if she could play something. She said no at first but others hyped her up and she agreed.

I will be honest, I expected her to play really badly (it�s a recorder ffs!) but she got one of the really long recorders (she said it was tenor whatever that it) and played some medieval poo poo. I�ll admit it was good but I still said it was ridiculous instrument to play as an adult and asked her why she wouldn�t try something more challenging. She replied that she liked it and the conversation changed.

Later on, I went to the toilet and noticed she had a bow and a sword hanging on the wall. I asked about it and apparently, she�s a hu Robin Hood nerd and actually shoots a bow and uses the sword. I should�ve known as she wears a wooden cloak instead of a coat. Admittedly, it�s not my proudest moment and I asked her if she could be more pretentious than that. And she had the audacity to reply that yes and said something in another language to which someone laughed.

I congratulated her and told her �well done, you�re the most pretentious woman I�ve ever met.�

She said, �you�re welcome, rear end in a top hat. You�ll be a character in one of my books soon, well done.� (Seriously, wtf, was she trying to be pretentious on purpose?)

I told her she was out of line but she replied that I was the rear end in a top hat for laughing at what instrument she played and then calling her pretentious for having interests.

I wanted to defend myself by someone else chimed in that �it was time for me to go.�

I said that they�re being rude but they ignored me and asked if they should call a taxi.

I was fuming all weekend. So much disrespect because she couldn�t just be normal. I expected everyone to apologize at work but they�re acting like nothing has happened and it�s really weird.

I�ve told my friend about this and she agrees that I wasn�t the rear end in a top hat for thinking that way about Amy but I shouldn�t have said it as I was new and made the wrong impression. She thinks I should apologize just in case But I think it�s Amy who owns me an apology. She�s the weirdo rear end in a top hat, not me. Or am i? AITA?

Congrats on being the lame villain in a chick flick movie?

# ? Nov 14, 2023 22:18

wizardofloneliness: Dec 30, 2008

r/relationships: oh John the Baptist oooo yeahh Baptizing with water

# ? Nov 14, 2023 22:20

Pope Corky the IX: Dec 18, 2006; What are you looking at?

All I did was walk around her home and loudly insult everything she likes, what gives?

# ? Nov 14, 2023 22:20

Kei Technical: Sep 20, 2011

Pope Corky the IX posted:

I will gift a platinum account or new avatar to whoever records themselves singing that song. With or without an instrument or backing track.

Really hoping for a Tom Waits impression on this

# ? Nov 14, 2023 22:23

the holy poopacy: May 16, 2009; hey! check this out; Fun Shoe

Wasn't there a post a week or two ago complaining about a woman's unwomanly sword and archery hobbies? Is someone just going around AITA writing hate fic about women with badass medieval hobbies :confused: