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Oh ok now I get it
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# ? Jan 13, 2024 02:43 |
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# ? May 30, 2024 09:11 |
LvK posted:he was posting pictures of his brother and his brother's family on his IG stories a few weeks ago, but that didn't feel in the spirit of the thread even if it was the only time he's mentioned family lately. Please keep it to Nathen himself. I know you did but I'm saying this as a general rule His family isn't part of this whole poo poo show beyond maybe throwing him money for Egeez or ScottPilgrimEATS or whatever batshit new idea he comes up with next week
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# ? Jan 13, 2024 03:59 |
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Seth Pecksniff posted:Please keep it to Nathen himself. I know you did but I'm saying this as a general rule If he finally gets around to marrying Garfield can we still mention garfield? I feel like there should be an exception for that in the sensible no bringing up family policy.
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# ? Jan 13, 2024 04:05 |
Well yeah that's a given because then it becomes GarfieldEATS co-
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# ? Jan 13, 2024 04:47 |
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He has upgraded from word file to excel sheet. https://twitter.com/GarfieldEATSco/status/1746396171684250069
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# ? Jan 14, 2024 07:43 |
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"Seen by Jim Davis"
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# ? Jan 14, 2024 07:46 |
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well if Jim Davis saw these recipes I'd be a fool to not buy in
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# ? Jan 14, 2024 07:51 |
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Jim Davis is the top of the triangle. Simple as.
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# ? Jan 14, 2024 07:54 |
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A read receipt from Jim Davis! Incredible!
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# ? Jan 14, 2024 07:54 |
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I think it possible he emailed the recipes to Davis, I'd put money on that email not being opened if the email was sent though.
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# ? Jan 14, 2024 09:17 |
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MassRafTer posted:He has upgraded from word file to excel sheet. Why is a recipe in an excel spreadsheet?
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# ? Jan 14, 2024 12:39 |
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Busters posted:Why is a recipe in an excel spreadsheet? No it's obviously a photo taken in .raw format of a word document with excel sheets copied into it. Not the worst way I've seen documents sent professionally. Somehow.
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# ? Jan 14, 2024 12:52 |
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nathen should put everything into a powerpoint like a professional
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# ? Jan 14, 2024 13:39 |
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God when Jim Davis dies, Nathen is going to be inconsolable. Then again, he’ll be able to make up all sorts of stories about what great friends they were with no chance of anyone contradicting him so
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# ? Jan 14, 2024 14:20 |
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Frank Frank posted:God when Jim Davis dies, Nathen is going to be inconsolable. Then again, he’ll be able to make up all sorts of stories about what great friends they were with no chance of anyone contradicting him so He basically does that now. No one important is really paying attention to Nathen. My bet is that there are, at most, about three people of any consequence at corporate who know about or still remember Nathen, and none of them care.
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# ? Jan 14, 2024 14:55 |
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Powerful Katrinka posted:He basically does that now. No one important is really paying attention to Nathen. My bet is that there are, at most, about three people of any consequence at corporate who know about or still remember Nathen, and none of them care. you mean theirs no Natefield movie secretly in the works? But there must be at least a sixth of half a dozen people clamoring for it!
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# ? Jan 14, 2024 15:17 |
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dr_rat posted:you mean theirs no Natefield movie secretly in the works? But there must be at least a sixth of half a dozen people clamoring for it! It's us, we're the target audience for Nathen. For real, though, that's my working theory for why Nathen can ramble on and on all day about Garfield without consequence: no one cares.
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# ? Jan 14, 2024 15:48 |
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I only accept recipes as .wav files
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# ? Jan 14, 2024 15:53 |
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Frank Frank posted:God when Jim Davis dies, Nathen is going to be inconsolable. Then again, he’ll be able to make up all sorts of stories about what great friends they were with no chance of anyone contradicting him so they're best friends so i can only imagine Nathen will have quite the eulogy prepared to give at the funeral
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# ? Jan 14, 2024 15:54 |
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Mozi posted:they're best friends so i can only imagine Nathen will have quite the eulogy prepared to give at the funeral Nathen’s so hungry for validation from a father figure that he’s mistaken Jim’s “sure, I’ll be your buddy, pay me” business deal for an emotional connection. Jesus wept.
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# ? Jan 14, 2024 16:06 |
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Frank Frank posted:#garfieldfeetpics GarfieldFEETS
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# ? Jan 14, 2024 17:28 |
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garfuccino.ogg
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# ? Jan 14, 2024 18:06 |
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Escape From Noise posted:GarfieldFEETS Buy that in a .club or .zone tld and sell it to nathen
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# ? Jan 14, 2024 19:04 |
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aren't there safety protocols for handling raw Word files in kitchens
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# ? Jan 14, 2024 19:07 |
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It's time to get sued. https://twitter.com/GarfieldEATSco/status/1746603704906846610
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# ? Jan 14, 2024 20:43 |
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MassRafTer posted:It's time to get sued. Working on a writeup now, hold on tight, Fanvestors
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# ? Jan 14, 2024 21:01 |
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An email from garfieldeatsapp @ gmail.com posted:Dear Fanvestors, He actually delivered the recipes in a reasonable timeframe on the day of, holy poo poo. He delivered two files - Final Garficcino Recipe-14oz-16oz.xlsx and FINAL RECIPE BOOK GE (TORONTO).docx.pdf The Garficcino xls is an almost completely unformatted collection of ingredients, loosely grouped into what garficcino they make. No instructions or anything, I guess just mix all that poo poo up. Here it is, in its entirety: I don't drink coffee much so I've got no clue how any of these actually sound, but most of them seem to just be regular rear end espresso. There also doesn't appear to be just a "base" Garficcino? Maybe that was the "Orange Bee" one? The original advertisement for Garficcinos listed them as Arabica coffee, which I don't see mentioned anywhere in the recipes so I guess that part's optional. Anyway, let's get on to the main attraction, the recipes themselves! I will try my best to preserve the actual (inconsistent) formatting of the document. Any time you think I may have hosed up the formatting, I assure you that's how it is in the document. This is the very first thing we see, which really is great considering the email says no Garfield iconography will be shown. Maybe cus it's the Garfield EATS logo? Whatever. Anyways, we start off strong with GARFIELD'S SECRET SAUCE! quote:SECRET SAUCE (1 tub/5 cans) I haven't personally had Tapenade so I can't really speculate on the taste of the sauce itself. But if you want to make your own, Nathen's got you covered: quote:TAPENADE (2 small containers) The recipe for pesto sauce lists both 56oz and 168oz recipes. I think 56oz is plenty of pesto sauce so I'll skip over the 168oz ingredient list (which is exactly the same but with different measurements for each ingredient), but if you REALLY need to know I can post it later. quote:PESTO SAUCE (56oz 168oz) quote:BARBEQUE SAUCE (2 small container) quote:BECHAMEL SAUCE And now, what I'm sure you've all been waiting for: quote:JOHN ARBUCKLE’S CLASSIC MARINARA SAUCE (1 small tub) quote:BOLOGNESE BEEF quote:BEEF STRIP MARINATION (BBQ STEAK PIZZA) quote:CHICKEN MARINATION quote:CARAMELIZED ONIONS quote:SAUTED MUSHROOM quote:SALAD DRESSING BIG COW LASAGNA quote:BIG COW LASAGNA Next up is the pizza dough, which like the pesto sauce also lists several different size batches - 6kg, 8kg, and 10kg. Since I'm not sure anyone here really needs that much fuckin pizza dough, I'll just list the 6kg measurements. Again, ask if for some reason you want the others: quote:PIZZA DOUGH (6kg 8kg 10kg) As for the pizza "recipes" themselves, they're just a list of what toppings to put on them - which is something you easily could have figured out just from looking at a menu. Hope you already know how much sauce to put on a pizza, or how to cook one already! For some reason Nathen decided to put the recipe for melting chocolate in between the regular pizza recipes and the thin crust recipes. Could I re-organize this to make for easier reading? Of course, but then we'd lose authorial intent! quote:MELTING CHOCOLATE quote:METHOD: quote:GARFIELD TAIL No clue how to fry them either. Air fry? Deep fry? What oil should be used, and at what temperature? Figure it out yourself, I guess! The final recipe is for PASTA PRODECURES quote:PASTA PROCEDURES And there you have it, the GarfieldEATS master list. Honestly most of the recipes seem fine at a glance? But I'm not a great chef so there's probably some funny poo poo hidden in there that's going over my head. The thing that surprised me most was the lack of recipe preambles - Nathen loves hearing himself talk, and I really expected there to be a paragraph or two for each recipe of him just talking about how great he and his recipes are. But I guess that requires so instead we get nothing.
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# ? Jan 14, 2024 22:18 |
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Lots to take in here, but was “garnivore” something we knew about before? Edit: ok still processing but I have some things to write about the pizzas Roy’s chicken: so apparently in the Garfield universe there’s a chicken named Roy. Is his own cooked flesh on the pizza or does he supply meat from others of his species to go on the pizza? The Jim Davis: a pizza named after an elderly cartoonist that has just pepperoni and pineapple?? Big City Drinkin fucked around with this message at 22:44 on Jan 14, 2024 |
# ? Jan 14, 2024 22:30 |
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I'm sorry, I'm stuck already at that Garfaccino list. None of the measures for the 16 oz versions add up with 500 ml milk as the basis. Fresh milk, not steamed milk? What? 300 ml water per a shot of espresso in the Americano? Jesus Christ
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# ? Jan 14, 2024 22:41 |
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Truffle oil? San Marzano tomato purée? Didn’t know GarfieldEats was so gastro. It doesn’t actually have the tomato purée in the ingredients or say how much to use, just “add the San Marzano canned tomato puree and give it a good mix” cool thanks Nathen!
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# ? Jan 14, 2024 22:51 |
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That's some basic-rear end recipes. I cook a lot but am in no way a professional, and there's not a thing on there I couldn't throw together from memory and eyeballing amounts. Except those coffees. I have loving standards.
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# ? Jan 14, 2024 23:09 |
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# ? Jan 14, 2024 23:20 |
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For those of us who never got the taste for coffee and so can't recognise the issue, could an aficionado explain the horrors?
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# ? Jan 14, 2024 23:31 |
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CodfishCartographer posted:Working on a writeup now, hold on tight, Fanvestors lol you gave Nathen money
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# ? Jan 14, 2024 23:54 |
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quote:crafted by none other than our brilliant Chief Taster, Nathen Mazri and adored by Jim Davis. Bullshit and bullshit. That’s as far as I made it without saying “bullshit” outloud. quote:But that's not all! As a bonus, Nathen also included the recipes for our famous Garficcino coffees. Now, you can enjoy the full GarfieldEATS experience right at home, any time you crave What? How the gently caress is that a “bonus”? He specifically mentioned Garfuccinos in his initial pitch and it was part of the menu. quote:
gently caress off Nathen. quote:
Bitchass GameFAQs disclaimer. Also genuine lmao that he named his company “Entertage Inc) Frank Frank fucked around with this message at 00:01 on Jan 15, 2024 |
# ? Jan 14, 2024 23:57 |
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Frank Frank posted:lol you gave Nathen money Pretty spicy coming from the guy who tried to buy a frozen lasagna despite being in a whole other country
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# ? Jan 15, 2024 00:05 |
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Orange juice and espresso
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# ? Jan 15, 2024 00:05 |
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Ok the wife has agreed for make Garfield lasagna but I’m not really clear what the recipe is. Is the tapenade part of the lasagna or just an appetizer? Are there step-by-step instructions for JUST the lasagna and if not, since he already has your info -could you please ask him for directions? We could guess but I’d rather have the authentic GarfieldEATs experienceZefiel posted:Pretty spicy coming from the guy who tried to buy a frozen lasagna despite being in a whole other country I’m still mad that he refused to ship it E: my wife is also famous for her deep dish lasagna and is already wrinkling her nose and saying things like “honey in the marinara? Are you SURE about that?”
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# ? Jan 15, 2024 00:07 |
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So I get restaurants have costs, but is it jus time or do most of these recipes have a lot of “it will last forever in the fridge” at the end of them? Like, sounds super fresh to use 20 day old sauce. Frank Frank posted:E: my wife is also famous for her deep dish lasagna and is already wrinkling her nose and saying things like “honey in the marinara? Are you SURE about that?” This is hilarious.
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# ? Jan 15, 2024 00:21 |
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# ? May 30, 2024 09:11 |
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I'm assuming they have honey in it as, you know fastfood for kids -I assume that was who the intended demographic was? I mean that's assuming nate actually thought about that sort of thing) so they wanted the sauce to be sweet. Had sweet marinara sauce in South East Asia, and it can sort of work. Like I certainly wouldn't recommend it or anything, but it's fine in a fast food sort of way.
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# ? Jan 15, 2024 00:34 |