(Thread IKs:
OwlFancier)
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free-born because we had a functioning health service in the 1980s in spite of the civil war that helped me into the world without charge by responding to a 999 call within the half hour so ma could get me out without me choking on the old umbilical cord or that
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 04:49 |
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# ? May 24, 2024 17:49 |
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crispix posted:also thanks for advice and all the scary warnings folks but i've recent experience of A&E and i'm not sitting in a plastic chair for 18 hours only to have a light shone in my eyes and sent home w/ paracetamol, i'll make a GP appointment on Monday and be seen in 6-8 weeks lol fake norn iron tbh, she's yer wee mammy
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 04:49 |
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don't be twee :/
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 04:50 |
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Wonder if this was sparked by the Post Office / Horizon affair? https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-68030762 quote:Universal Credit claims no longer paused while AI fraud checks carried out £1.6bn in 7 years - if they actually charged big companies their taxes, clawed back money paid out for non-existent or unusable PPE, Track & Trace, Rwandan deals and all the other dodgy stuff, switched DWP investigators to tax investigators, they could almost certainly cover that without traumatising claimants.
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 04:50 |
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crispix posted:don't be twee :/ calling yer auld doll "mum" is a quare bit more twee than "mammy"
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 07:43 |
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*looks at opinion polls* Yeah Laura K, I wonder why he thinks the Tories are dead in the water. And just in case anyone thinks he was talking about Scotland, he wasn't: BBC posted:So what is exactly is the First Minister of Scotland, Humza Yousaf, up to when he proclaims so confidently that Starmer will reach Downing Street - and that the Labour leader "doesn't need Scotland" in order to do it? I don't care if it's clickbait, it baited me.
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 08:07 |
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"Technically right", the best kind of correct! E; I looked at the article and by 'technically' she means 'completely, and it isn't close, but I will do everything in my power to destroy the fanatical Leninist Starmer so here's some pablum about how voters are fickle and things might change before the GE' Ms Adequate fucked around with this message at 08:27 on Jan 21, 2024 |
# ? Jan 21, 2024 08:18 |
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Yes I feel some posters are , understandably because no one else in UK gives the tiniest poo poo, unaware of just how bad things are in Northern Ireland. It’s not just “wait 10 hours to be seen in A&E”. The hospitals, along with every other loving thing that depends on an actual government running it, is nearing total collapse. You’d get better treatment in a field hospital in the middle of a war zone. Crispy is just another example of someone having their health put at risk due to the utter disfunction here.
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 08:52 |
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ThomasPaine posted:I saw a fesshole post recently from a guy who decided to have a wank when his wife was out and got a bit freaky borrowing her toys. He ended up having a real bad stroke during the act, to the point the doctors later told him it was touch and go whether he'd make it. Apparently, though, through some insane feat of willpower brought on by the sheer terror of imagining his wife's last memory of him being his corpse riding her dildo, he managed to get up, mid-stroke (hohoho), and put it away before returning to bed to pass out, then woke up in the hospital some time later. I was told there was an incredibly slim, but non-zero chance I would somehow die while they removed what they euphemistically called a foreign object The weirdest part was waking up next to said object wrapped in a couple of plastic bags though. "better get this dildo back to him so he can do it again!!" If I was the doctor I think I'd have put it in the bin.
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 08:52 |
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I think we need a Norman & Mrs Norman wiki. Are they also freebirths? What clan are they affiliated with? Did British Leyland allow him to serve in anything larger than a Locust or a Firefly, or would he have had to join an mercenary unit?
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 09:19 |
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Anyone doing Mrs Norman except crispix (and Norman himself of course ) should be bannable . Unless he dies, in which case we all get a stake in Mrs Norman: The Musical
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 09:33 |
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Jaeluni Asjil posted:Wonder if this was sparked by the Post Office / Horizon affair? You missed the word "or". Literally every Tory fraud you listed exceeds £240m a year. The sweetheart deal that Vodafone were given in 2010 could by itself have covered the entire first round of austerity cuts to UK councils if they'd been made to pay in full.
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 09:37 |
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Mrs Normans boys.
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 09:45 |
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Failed Imagineer posted:Anyone doing Mrs Norman except crispix (and Norman himself of course ) should be bannable . Agreed. When I do all caps stuff in future, its my Stewart Lee impression. BACK IN THE GOOD OLD DAYS Ms Adequate posted:fake norn iron tbh, she's yer wee mammy https://www.irishtimes.com/life-and-style/health-family/mam-mum-mom-or-mammy-what-do-most-irish-people-call-their-mothers-1.4833679 "Some 31 per cent of adults call their mother "Mam" when speaking to her, 23 per cent prefer "Mum", 12 per cent say "Mom" and a further 12 per cent use "Mammy". Another 4 per cent of respondents call their mothers by their first name." Its 'mum' in my area. Its the freaks that use their first name you have to watch out for. Bobby Deluxe posted:Mrs Normans boys. If you didn't see in the Irish thread, there's a French version called La Madame Brun, and its a carbon copy of the irish version. Its like a SCP uncanny valley of it.
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 10:30 |
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fuctifino posted:I can legally drive my <4mph electric wheelchair while inebriated on any substance as it's classed as an extension to my legs, but it's a grey area when it comes to mobility scooters. While you can technically drive scooters drunk if you stay on the pavement and stick to <4mph, there have been isolated cases of police gaining court orders to confiscate mobility scooters from problematic dangerous drivers. In most cases those people end up purchasing a replacement the same day and are back out on the roads, forcing the police to go back to square one with everything. I was thinking about your benefits/inheritance dilemma the other day. This might sound like a captain tom style grift and I, much like captain tom's family, don't know poo poo about charities, but could you put the money straight into some charity setup in your mum's name (it can be a nasty name if you want) then buy like 5 of those bubble cars second hand on ebay and lease them back to yourself and other people in need of them for some really favourable token rate? That way you don't need to splurge all the money on a brand new one just to come in under the benefits cash limit, but you still get one and so do some other people.
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 10:57 |
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crispix posted:
You might be at peace with what could happen to you, but just think what the thread will do to Mrs Norman if you aren't here to stop them. Save yourself, save Norman's
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 11:06 |
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I had a device based episode about a decade back, had been staring at elite dangerous for hours when suddenly it felt like someone had flicked me in the temple and my eye went out of whack + headache for several hours. Blamed it on the reflection of the ir tracker and wondered if it was the sort of thing I should have had immediatetely looked at... I'll get you for this braben
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 11:16 |
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NotJustANumber99 posted:could you put the money straight into some charity setup in your mum's name The DWP would count this as becoming poor deliberately and stop your benefits.
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 11:48 |
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Ms Adequate posted:calling yer auld doll "mum" is a quare bit more twee than "mammy" My NI aunt calls her "mummy" in a really strong Belfast accent and it's very strange.
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 12:00 |
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Heads up for tonight: They've just upgraded the amber warning to cover most of the UK Re: inheritance stuff, I'm probably going to set up a trust and have the bulk of the money put into that, with the trust paying out for things like medicine costs, scooters and other items. I'm also going to be drawing up a couple of Lasting Powers of Attorney documents to give a close and trusted friend legal permission to look after my finances and make medical decisions for me if I'm ever unable to make them myself, and I'm also drawing up a will to give this person everything when I eventually go. At the moment, my brother is my official next of kin and, due to a lack of will, my current beneficiary, and that didn't feel quite right
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 12:02 |
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fuctifino posted:Heads up for tonight:
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 12:07 |
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happyhippy posted:.. I always said 'ma'... but not 'ma ma', a la Judge Dredd.
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 12:10 |
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fuctifino posted:Heads up for tonight: And the UK ends the only way it can. In a giant shower of piss. It was a good run all!
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 12:17 |
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There's 18% of mum's unaccounted for? Mother?
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 12:17 |
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Microplastics posted:I was told there was an incredibly slim, but non-zero chance I would somehow die while they removed what they euphemistically called a foreign object was it switched on the whole time it was stuck up ur bum
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 12:21 |
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Just Another Lurker posted:Judge Dredd. SHUTTLE'S CUMMIN, PAAWW!!!!
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 12:23 |
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Jakabite posted:Just beware of over-reliance. I caught myself without fags and milk the other day and almost got in the car - the shop is a five minute walk. That's my main vice with the car now too. I'm old enough now to just go and get something if I want it, but I'm also lazy. The closest scotmid is a 25 minute walk away, enough to put me off going there for anything unless it a big shop pre-car. Now it's a 5 minute drive, if that, so if the wife or I want snacks like crisps or something then off to the shops I go. Kin fucked around with this message at 12:36 on Jan 21, 2024 |
# ? Jan 21, 2024 12:29 |
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happyhippy posted:https://www.irishtimes.com/life-and-style/health-family/mam-mum-mom-or-mammy-what-do-most-irish-people-call-their-mothers-1.4833679 Huh interesting, jokes aside this is a broader spread than I expected! Though I have heard a lot of people say something that's like at a weird midpoint between "mum" and "mom". The first name people are utterly demented, surely the need to do something about them is enough to show the rest of us how petty our sectarian differences really are... E; NotJustANumber99 posted:There's 18% of mum's unaccounted for? Mother? Mater. E2; Thinking about if Dredd was exactly the same in every regard except he had an accent from darkest Fermanagh Ms Adequate fucked around with this message at 13:07 on Jan 21, 2024 |
# ? Jan 21, 2024 13:03 |
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crispix posted:was it switched on the whole time it was stuck up ur bum no, thankfully the batteries ran out by the time I got to hospital
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 13:11 |
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Lmao that Humza Yousaf just knocked 5-10 points off Labour's lead by saying the SNP would be "very willing" to work with Labour if Keith & the Gang win the next election. Expect the first Tory attack ads to start running tomorrow on that.
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 13:15 |
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Ms Adequate posted:The first name people are utterly demented, surely the need to do something about them is enough to show the rest of us how petty our sectarian differences really are... Don't think there is anything really causing it, less its step-parents. I know some kids just call their parents by their first names as I used to do it when I was a kid. And my brother's kid is doing the same right now to him, must be some way to learn the language, recognizing a person can have different names.
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 13:35 |
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fuctifino posted:Heads up for tonight: THE PISS IS SPREADING. Also blood for the norn gods.
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 13:40 |
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Only time I call my parents by their name is if I'm in a shop or somewhere where shouting "DAD!" will have everyone over the age of forty turn to see if you're theirs or not. And if they've displeased me they're "father" and "mother."
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 13:42 |
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happyhippy posted:
Very nice of the bad weather to respect Great Britain's coastal waters.
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 13:43 |
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Tesseraction posted:Very nice of the bad weather to respect Great Britain's coastal waters. Is that what they meant by Irish sea border then?
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 13:58 |
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fuctifino posted:Heads up for tonight: sorry for your loss and congratulations on your gains Mebh posted:And the UK ends the only way it can. In a giant shower of piss.
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 14:05 |
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Mebh posted:Is that what they meant by Irish sea border then? Best thing Boris ever did imo. He's out there now telling the storm to gently caress off
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 14:06 |
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drat that map really does look like someone pissed all over the UK.
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 14:06 |
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Just Another Lurker posted:I always said 'ma'... but not 'ma ma', a la Judge Dredd. This is also how Conservative speeches work. e: like so
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 14:09 |
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# ? May 24, 2024 17:49 |
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Tesseraction posted:drat that map really does look like someone pissed all over the UK.
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# ? Jan 21, 2024 14:10 |