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The Bramble posted:I’m kind of curious how the thread will land on this one. Personally while I think the OP may have some kind of sorta point about how her family doesn’t like her, she picked the stupidest hill to die on over it and is insufferably whiny and self-absorbed. I think being slightly whiny and self-absorbed is a natural consequence of a family that ignores you and dislikes you. She should skip the funeral and go nc with her lovely family and probably get therapy but I do not blame her in the least.
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May 15, 2024 17:23
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Yeah. Like I personally wouldn't care if the funeral was on my birthday, but in context of all the other stuff I'm like, why don't you skip the funeral and go to the movies or something?Mr. Lobe posted:Can you elaborate on how they hosed themselves, like were there cascading consequences of her walking or did the fold Halloween Jack fucked around with this message at 17:32 on May 15, 2024 |
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May 15, 2024 17:25
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had a very similar experience at the office yesterday where the new sales intern at the local division wanted to know why i had a cool office and why i didnt really even have to be in the office and how unfair it was that i take my afternoons at home and its like my homie you are like 19, i work for corporate and all my bosses sit in a boardroom in a completely different state.
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May 15, 2024 17:30
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The Bramble posted:I’m kind of curious how the thread will land on this one. Personally while I think the OP may have some kind of sorta point about how her family doesn’t like her, she picked the stupidest hill to die on over it and is insufferably whiny and self-absorbed. Funerals tend to happen when they happen, taking others important dates into consideration isn't really done. The post itself is rather self-centred though so it's difficult to interpret if this was malicious in any way from the families point of view. After all she seems to love her grandmother and still resent her for things she said and did, it's a little bizarre. My father comes from a large family (6 brothers) and there was no way my grandparents could dote on us all equally or take us everywhere together, there were that many cousins you couldn't even fit us in the same house at the same time. But I also never once considered where I ranked on the family chart so I suppose these things matter to some people.
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May 15, 2024 17:32
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Long rambling story with multiple updates in r/BORUpdates, I just wanted to call out one little section near the end. My Step Dad purposefully ruined my $900 prom dress by washing it! Is there anything I can do such as take legal? quote:...
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May 15, 2024 17:33
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My Spirit Otter posted:microwaved coffee the same day is gross as hell imo. it does something to the flavour, i find.
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May 15, 2024 17:41
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I wonder what it's like to be an adult, married with children, and get your rear end kicked because you destroyed a girl's dress and picked a fight about it.
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May 15, 2024 17:43
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I don't know why this line made me laugh so hard but it did and I want it to be a thread title: r/relationships: I contemplated and researched the afterlife. OP sounds utterly insufferable, no wonder her family doesn't care about her being at the funeral or not.
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May 15, 2024 17:45
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The Bramble posted:I’m kind of curious how the thread will land on this one. Personally while I think the OP may have some kind of sorta point about how her family doesn’t like her, she picked the stupidest hill to die on over it and is insufferably whiny and self-absorbed. I feel like this is NAH (at least for this specific situation). They were already waiting months for the ground to thaw, and they've got a big family to schedule around, so I can't really blame them for deciding not to delay further for the sake of someone who by their own accounts isn't close and isn't trying to be close. Equally, I get that why OP is upset, having a funeral and a celebration crossing over is bound to be emotionally tricky, especially when it was already a complicated relationship. Given the mother's reaction I wonder if the father did consider the birthday, made a difficult decision, and doesn't need to be attacked on it. OP should probably just not go and drift away from the extended family. Neither party particularly wants to be involved with each other so there's a pretty simple solution to just move on (and get therapy).
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May 15, 2024 17:47
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deported to Canada posted:Funerals tend to happen when they happen, taking others important dates into consideration isn't really done. The post states that the funeral is for scattering ashes so it's not like they're scrambling to have an open casket service before the makeup starts to melt. I don't think it's unreasonable for her parents to have remembered her birthday when making plans and at least bring it up with her, but it sounds like she's a very forgotten child.
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May 15, 2024 17:49
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Quackles posted:Ferrari has always been like this. The story goes that in or around 1963, Ferruccio Lamborghini (whose business was making tractors at the time) had bought a Ferrari, and had found various minor issues with it after driving it. He decided to tell Enzo Ferrari. Ferrari replied that he didn't want advice from a tractor mechanic. Ferrari even has some models that you can buy, but don't actually own. You pay for it, but they keep it and deliver it to track days for you, wherein you are allowed the privilege of driving your car for a few hours before they take it back.
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May 15, 2024 17:55
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Halloween Jack posted:My friend used to work IT at a law firm where the female dress code is skirts and heels, no exceptions. She told them to go gently caress themselves and they did. If I'm ever in charge of the dress code, it will be that heels are banned. They're the shoe from hell, and they can go burn there.
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May 15, 2024 17:58
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The_Franz posted:Ferrari even has some models that you can buy, but don't actually own. You pay for it, but they keep it and deliver it to track days for you, wherein you are allowed the privilege of driving your car for a few hours before they take it back. I mean, not to defend them, but those are generally non road legal track cars which need a lot of maintenance and poo poo. Probably better not to just hand them out to shithead billionaires and failsons who will almost immediately kill or maim a bunch of kids with their 200mph fireball.
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May 15, 2024 18:00
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Yeah but Ferrari is just doing it to protect the luxury image of their brand. If anyone who wants one can have a Ferrari, it no longer feels special to the people who buy it specifically because it's in short supply. So to keep that illusion, you limit sales. Birkin bags are the same thing. And let's be honest, even 'normal' people fall for this poo poo, FOMO as a concept is pretty much born from people who are worried they'll miss a limited release of some luxury item, or miss the next Big Event StrangersInTheNight fucked around with this message at 18:06 on May 15, 2024 |
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May 15, 2024 18:04
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I would almost guarantee boots and a hoodie are not even against the dress code wherever they work
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May 15, 2024 18:07
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This is also part of why fashion brands don't design for bigger people, despite that being more lucrative from a sales perspective. Because many designers *don't want* their designs to be seen on bigger people, they're basically like 'ew that fat person being seen in *my clothes* is going to ruin the image of my brand, which is for young hot people, so no'. Once a luxury item gets luxe enough, it becomes about making sure that only the people you want to be seen with your items are the ones seen with it because that crafts the mythology of the brand as being For Hot Bitches Only. StrangersInTheNight fucked around with this message at 18:11 on May 15, 2024 |
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May 15, 2024 18:08
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Hellblazer187 posted:I think being slightly whiny and self-absorbed is a natural consequence of a family that ignores you and dislikes you. She should skip the funeral and go nc with her lovely family and probably get therapy but I do not blame her in the least. Yea, this is where I'm at, hopefully they can get to a place where it doesn't bother them as much because the family isn't going to change.
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May 15, 2024 18:08
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The Bramble posted:I’m kind of curious how the thread will land on this one. Personally while I think the OP may have some kind of sorta point about how her family doesn’t like her, she picked the stupidest hill to die on over it and is insufferably whiny and self-absorbed. Really should have spoilered the age. I can understand being early 20's and being this dramatic about a birthday (not even a milestone one! Nana had the good graces to wait til that had passed!), but jesus..30? Overall? No one is the rear end in a top hat. Family huge so what, dates have to get made. Yes, it's a bummer to go to a funeral on your b-day.
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May 15, 2024 18:13
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I spent my 16th birthday at my great-grandpa's funeral. Sucked, but like someone else mentioned, funerals don't tend to be the kind of thing with a lot of wiggle room for scheduling, especially since we actually did have an open-casket service. It probably helped that I had a family that actually loved me, though.
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May 15, 2024 18:14
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John Wick of Dogs posted:I would almost guarantee boots and a hoodie are not even against the dress code wherever they work The dress code in their mind is the dress code they abide by, which is whatever ensures they are in compliance and others are not They just want to be a cop
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May 15, 2024 18:15
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I missed my grandma's funeral because they held it very quickly within a couple of days and I was literally at my gate terminal boarding on a flight to France when she died.
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May 15, 2024 18:16
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Maybe it was an Arnold Rimmer situation where the family sucked and was lovely to her but also she also sucks?
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May 15, 2024 18:19
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Bobstar posted:I think that's a different story, but it jangled my brain from the previous thread too. I think it was a younger rockstar creative who the OP decided was a silly little girl wearing dumb non-compliant clothes...and maybe they got fired for making a huge fuss? drat it I was about to repost that and didn't even realize I was the one who posted it the first time!
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May 15, 2024 18:28
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Alternative take - as its a large family getting together maybe all the parents knew that the funeral was going to be highjacked by a bunch of cousins falling over each other to propose to their partners or announce their pregnancies, and of course OP was going to be bleating on about it being her birthday month the whole time. All the parents wanted to do is get the whole thing over quickly so that they could have their secret family meeting (without their in-laws) in order to discuss go bags.
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May 15, 2024 18:29
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A particularly egregious golden child/scapegoat story. AITA Little sister got a new car and I left the party. quote:I (17F) and my sister (15F) used to get along great when we were kids. Since I started high school, it feels like she takes all the attention.
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May 15, 2024 18:35
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Deformed Church posted:I mean, not to defend them, but those are generally non road legal track cars which need a lot of maintenance and poo poo. Probably better not to just hand them out to shithead billionaires and failsons who will almost immediately kill or maim a bunch of kids with their 200mph fireball. You can buy a lot of non-road-legal vehicles, but the manufacturers don't insist on keeping them in their own private garage and only letting you drive it 3 times a year. StrangersInTheNight posted:Yeah but Ferrari is just doing it to protect the luxury image of their brand. If anyone who wants one can have a Ferrari, it no longer feels special to the people who buy it specifically because it's in short supply. So to keep that illusion, you limit sales. Birkin bags are the same thing. Remember when discount shoe brand Payless rebranded as 'Palessi' and trolled a bunch of dumbass fashion influencers? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xpqqKRlqZfU
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May 15, 2024 18:36
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Bobstar posted:I think that's a different story, but it jangled my brain from the previous thread too. I think it was a younger rockstar creative who the OP decided was a silly little girl wearing dumb non-compliant clothes...and maybe they got fired for making a huge fuss? Had a hearty  at this partquote:I rent my clothes to look at my part. I believe in dress for the job you want. I just picture a Rent-A-Center/Men's Wearhouse combo where he's like "yeah, I can't believe the audacity...by the way was this suit dry cleaned after the last return?"
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May 15, 2024 18:38
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Kiss Kiss Bang Bang posted:Really should have spoilered the age. I can understand being early 20's and being this dramatic about a birthday (not even a milestone one! Nana had the good graces to wait til that had passed!), but jesus..30? It's not even the huge family thing getting me, as much as the fact that OP appears to be still holding out hope their relationship with their family will one day improve/they'll just magically start caring more after 30 years of evidence to the contrary. Honey - if they didn't care about your birthday before, they certainly aren't now. What are you loving expecting. I am not surprised OP is Southern tho bc this fits the bill for petty Southern family drama per-fect-lyyy. 'Don't say anything, quietly stew, then explode' may as well be on the GA state flag.
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May 15, 2024 18:39
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FMguru posted:A particularly egregious golden child/scapegoat story. i get weird vibes from the op...the sister never seems to actually do anything. she 'acts dumb', she got popular which is somehow the reason op couldn't go to prom? her dad goes shopping with her but the phrasing of "i actually dont like clothes from sweatshops" seems to imply her disinviting herself and not ever initiating her preferred activity...the sister had a boat party and she didn't, but was that because she wasn't allowed? certainly seems like the dad is thoughtlessly favoring the younger sister because she's more outgoing and has more in common with her, but the shock and horror they seemed to react with doesn't match up with your typical "shut up stop complaining" golden child stuff.
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May 15, 2024 18:43
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I sometimes feel I'm living in another dimension because I've never in my entire very large extended social and family circle known anyone who has: -Had a gender reveal party. -Proposed in front of anyone other than their partner let alone made a big event out of it. -Announced a pregnancy at an event or even really made a big deal about it besides simply telling people they're close to. -Had a bad wedding. -Had any sort of social or family drama that involved people "blowing up their phone"
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May 15, 2024 18:43
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Baronjutter posted:I sometimes feel I'm living in another dimension because I've never in my entire very large extended social and family circle known anyone who has: Yeah same I guess most of the people I know are pretty chill. Even my buddy Torkbuzz nowadays
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May 15, 2024 18:48
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THIRTY EIGHT YEARS OLD Don’t stress about what she’s wearing, she can’t have long left
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May 15, 2024 18:48
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StrangersInTheNight posted:why the gently caress do people even care about how you're 'damaging the reputation of the business'. it's not like if the business does well, you're seeing a single goddamn penny - the reward you get for working so hard to keep the company open is getting to keep the job you have right now, and that's it. I was working at a nuclear waste disposal site many years ago and we had a new CEO come in and demand that we replace all the lab coats and hard hats on site because they had old branding on and it might "confuse the clients". Never mind that we had exactly one client (the government) and doing this generated about a half ton of low level waste that needed disposal. A load more work for just no benefit.
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May 15, 2024 18:54
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John Wick of Dogs posted:I missed my grandma's funeral because they held it very quickly within a couple of days and I was literally at my gate terminal boarding on a flight to France when she died. I missed my grandmother's funeral because I was in America when she died, and my insane aunt tried to have me deported.
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May 15, 2024 19:06
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The Maroon Hawk posted:I spent my 16th birthday at my great-grandpa's funeral. Sucked, but like someone else mentioned, funerals don't tend to be the kind of thing with a lot of wiggle room for scheduling, especially since we actually did have an open-casket service. My thirteenth birthday was at my great uncles funeral surrounded by a bunch of people I didn't know but were very happy I was there as a distraction. G1mby posted:I was working at a nuclear waste disposal site many years ago and we had a new CEO come in and demand that we replace all the lab coats and hard hats on site because they had old branding on and it might "confuse the clients". Never mind that we had exactly one client (the government) and doing this generated about a half ton of low level waste that needed disposal. A load more work for just no benefit. Our company spun off from our parent company and when our new ceos came round to visit we had to hide all our old branded swag. Even though they also had previously worked for the old company. No far better for them to think we don't actually have mousepads or something.
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May 15, 2024 19:11
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KoRMaK posted:microwaved coffee is fine, it's not the microwave that makes it taste like poo poo. it's that most people leave the burner on for hours and hours, burning the coffee. if you turn the warmer off right after brewing, coffee is fine the next day. it's not like leaving milk out My coffee maker is a vacuum flask that keeps the coffee warm for hours without needing a heating plate. Saves electricity and doesn't burn your coffee.
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May 15, 2024 19:17
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Farg posted:i get weird vibes from the op...the sister never seems to actually do anything. she 'acts dumb', she got popular which is somehow the reason op couldn't go to prom? her dad goes shopping with her but the phrasing of "i actually dont like clothes from sweatshops" seems to imply her disinviting herself and not ever initiating her preferred activity...the sister had a boat party and she didn't, but was that because she wasn't allowed? certainly seems like the dad is thoughtlessly favoring the younger sister because she's more outgoing and has more in common with her, but the shock and horror they seemed to react with doesn't match up with your typical "shut up stop complaining" golden child stuff.  detail, as is the dad's claim that the car just happened to show up at the exact time of the OP's valedictorian celebration (car deliveries don't just happen at random times, those things are usually very tightly scheduled, and for obvious reasons).
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May 15, 2024 19:18
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The Bramble posted:I’m kind of curious how the thread will land on this one. Personally while I think the OP may have some kind of sorta point about how her family doesn’t like her, she picked the stupidest hill to die on over it and is insufferably whiny and self-absorbed. I'm on OPs side, I know from my own experience that after a lifetime of being steamrollered by family, you get really aware of just about all the ways your needs are disregarded, in both big and little things. Grandma is ashes. She's shelf-stable. She can be buried any time. Arsenic Lupin posted:I worked (very briefly) for an investment bank. My boss sprained (broke? Not sure) her ankle and insisted on wearing a high heel on the not-in-a-cast foot so as not to be visibly out of uniform. Should have drawn a 👠 on the cast and just worn a nice comfy shoe on the other foot Pookah fucked around with this message at 19:26 on May 15, 2024 |
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May 15, 2024 19:23
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The Bramble posted:I’m kind of curious how the thread will land on this one. Personally while I think the OP may have some kind of sorta point about how her family doesn’t like her, she picked the stupidest hill to die on over it and is insufferably whiny and self-absorbed. Your family are Alabama people. you moved to NYC. You're like, turbo-dead to them.
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May 15, 2024 19:44
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FMguru posted:The fifteen year old bouncing excitedly on her dad's lap whenever a car commercial came on is a pretty Another noticeable detail is that the dad’s reaction was only an excuse/apology for the timing - not the actual purchase or difference in how he’s treating his kids.
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May 15, 2024 19:53
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