House-buying thread - Why is everyone involved in this process so deeply stupid?

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Ask/Tell > Business, Finance, and Careers > House-buying thread - Why is everyone involved in this process so deeply stupid?

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moana: Jun 18, 2005; one of the more intellectual satire communities on the web

Motronic posted:

Did you really miss the important bit: That's not a sufficient water test for a purchasing decision. If the water test you got didn't tell you this already you didn't sufficiently evaluate the home you are trying to buy. There are a lot worse things that can be wrong with the water that you absolutely can't taste.

I think you overrate the ability of a first time home purchaser to understand exactly what they need to be looking for in a water lab report, let alone how to evaluate which water lab to get - how on earth would they know the lab report is insufficient? They paid for a report on water that they thought would warn them of any problems. If the report didn't show a red flag on anything, how the gently caress is an amateur supposed to know that it's the report that's the problem? If they get a "better" report from a "better" lab and it comes back clean, how do they know *that* report is sufficient? Unless you already know what you're supposed to be looking for, which I guarantee 99% of home buyers don't.

This gets at the heart of most problems in home purchasing, that buyers are almost always amateurs who are relying on trust to some extent to get them through the process, because the alternative is insane. It puts way too much onus on the buyer to understand technical details that many people don't have the education to understand. If someone is buying a house and they get a water report, that poo poo should come back with a huge red flag on the page if the water is salty. If it doesn't communicate that properly, then it shouldn't be an acceptable water report for a home inspection. The burden should not be on the homebuyer to decide which loving line items in a water report they need to scrutinize. That is some elitist bullshit, quite frankly.

# ¿ Mar 3, 2022 09:47

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# ¿ May 15, 2024 04:55

moana: Jun 18, 2005; one of the more intellectual satire communities on the web

Motronic posted:

Or is the suggestion that there's no way to do this right and everyone should just throw their hands up in the air and take what the get?

The suggestion is that for most people, there's no way to ever know if you're doing things perfectly right. Telling someone that they should have "ponied up" for a different water test is faulting the buyer for not being perfect in an area where they should not be expected to have expertise. I'm sure the op would have gladly paid for a correct water test, had they known they needed it.

You have a lot of knowledge and it's easy for you to (accidentally or otherwise) insult people who don't have that domain knowledge or can't acquire it easily. But I think it's important to acknowledge that for most people it's not a lack of will or effort when things go wrong. It's that this is a convoluted, opaque, deeply stupid process that is hard to get through in a thousand different ways.

Not being able to interpret a water lab report is not the same as, say, buying a cat piss house.

# ¿ Mar 3, 2022 16:55

moana: Jun 18, 2005; one of the more intellectual satire communities on the web

GlyphGryph posted:

What is a buyers agent actually supposed to do? I sort of feel like mine could be replaced by a machine and nothing of value would be lost at this point

Fire them, get a better one. Gonna quote myself from this thread:

quote:

Our agent grew up in the area and was blunt about vetoing houses left and right because they were in not great areas and we were planning to have a kid. For a year, she found us cheap short term rentals and showed us houses and didn't pressure us at all.

When we saw one house, she said "this is the one" even though it was a total fixer upper and we were kind of iffy about it. She pushed us to put in an offer, it felt weird how much she wanted us to get this house. Up to the day we closed, we were waffling.

Turns out it's the best street in the world, I can let my 4 year old go play in the road or walk to a friend's house, there are a dozen other kids outside playing and biking around at all times. The neighbors have block parties and build skate ramps together and help out with yardwork and pet sit and share everything. It's straight out of a movie how awesome the street is. We never in a million years would have picked it out, but she instantly knew. Worth every penny.

There are a shitton of bad realtors out there. We got lucky, honestly. But you get someone who knows the area deeply, who can get to know you and figure out what you need, man, it makes a difference.

# ¿ Mar 27, 2022 21:54

moana: Jun 18, 2005; one of the more intellectual satire communities on the web

Pollyanna posted:

Mine are gonna try to pull some �oh we have it all in our LLC and we�ll just buy the house and rent it to you� bullshit, I just know it. Cash or no deal.

Ugh, this happened to my friend and as much as I tried to tell her not to take the deal, she wouldn't listen.

She also didn't listen to me last January when I told her maybe her husband's financial advisor shouldn't be putting all their retirement money into a hedged ARKK fund, heyo.

# ¿ Mar 29, 2022 06:46

moana: Jun 18, 2005; one of the more intellectual satire communities on the web

Yeah, here's a 2/2 with the same square footage near me: https://www.zillow.com/homedetails/243-Ada-Ave-Felton-CA-95018/16150241_zpid/

My favorite part is the aerial photos.

# ¿ Mar 30, 2022 04:45

moana: Jun 18, 2005; one of the more intellectual satire communities on the web

But it comes with a free car! Steal of a deal, I tell you.

# ¿ Mar 30, 2022 06:13

moana: Jun 18, 2005; one of the more intellectual satire communities on the web

spwrozek posted:

Tarps are... a kind of roof.

Tarp house was listed at $599k, currently they're going into a final bidding round starting at $775k, cash offers preferred. Lol, lmao

# ¿ Apr 2, 2022 00:05

moana: Jun 18, 2005; one of the more intellectual satire communities on the web

moana posted:

Yeah, here's a 2/2 with the same square footage near me: https://www.zillow.com/homedetails/243-Ada-Ave-Felton-CA-95018/16150241_zpid/

My favorite part is the aerial photos.

Tarp roof house just went for $850k. Haven't met the people yet but they claim to not be flippers so that's good I guess

# ¿ Apr 26, 2022 05:57

moana: Jun 18, 2005; one of the more intellectual satire communities on the web

You'll want a spell to banish evil spirits: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p8H_Pn7zgQM

That only works for the beginner level HOAs, though, most of them have protective hexes built into the statutes that nobody ever reads.

# ¿ May 5, 2022 03:44

moana: Jun 18, 2005; one of the more intellectual satire communities on the web

Nah, he said that was his last post in the thread, if he comes back now to reply just report it.

# ¿ Jun 12, 2022 02:15

moana: Jun 18, 2005; one of the more intellectual satire communities on the web

phosdex posted:

This makes sense for warranty. But even for homeowners insurance? I'm buying my house in cash so I don't have a lender requiring me to do anything.

Would you be willing to replace your house with cash if it burns down in a fire or floods or whatever? If not, then get homeowners insurance. The reason everybody gets insurance for big things like cars and houses is because it would not be feasible or desirable to pay out of pocket in the worst case scenario. And that's what insurance is, you paying for them to cover you in worst case scenarios.

# ¿ Jun 12, 2022 18:34

moana: Jun 18, 2005; one of the more intellectual satire communities on the web

phosdex posted:

I was just confused because it seems like Slugworth is saying to not get home insurance.

I didn't read it that way, you asked about home warranties and it sounded like he was responding to that but saying that not having homeowners insurance could ruin you the same way car and health problems could.

# ¿ Jun 12, 2022 18:58

moana: Jun 18, 2005; one of the more intellectual satire communities on the web

Johnny Truant posted:

just wanted to lol at this. lmfao.

Dude, he'll be fine. Didn't you see he has a boat? A+ backup plan for buying in Florida.

# ¿ Jul 6, 2022 15:59

moana: Jun 18, 2005; one of the more intellectual satire communities on the web

I'm in a group chat with the neighbors and invited people out tonight to see the moon through the library telescope we have out. One of our neighbors started talking about the moon is hollow and I just laughed and asked if that's from a TV show. No, he was serious. I looked it up, the hollow moon theory brought to you by the same guy who does the lizard people conspiracy. Lolol

# ¿ Sep 1, 2022 05:43

moana: Jun 18, 2005; one of the more intellectual satire communities on the web

KYOON GRIFFEY JR posted:

there really needs to be a hefty tax on unoccupied real estate

We've got one on the ballot this year in santa cruz, let's see if it goes through!

# ¿ Oct 28, 2022 22:39

moana: Jun 18, 2005; one of the more intellectual satire communities on the web

Ornery and Hornery posted:

who here has bought a home with a significant other, to whom you were not legally married?

in part me your wisdom pls

I did, we split up a few years later and I got the house and paid half the equity to him over the course of a year or so. It was no drama because we were no drama type people. I imagine that even with a solid legal agreement your life could be made hell if you buy with the wrong kind of person.

Also it's "impart".

# ¿ May 22, 2023 13:52

moana: Jun 18, 2005; one of the more intellectual satire communities on the web

No, I would have eaten the cap gains taxes if I had sold eventually for more than the primary residence exclusion but I didn't think that was his problem to deal with. I don't think the house price changing after we had agreed to a repayment plan would have been his problem either, only mine and only if I was forced to sell. I don't understand the question about insurance, do you mean like if my house caught on fire, he would have taken half the insurance payout and run? No way.

I mean, sure there's lots that can go wrong but there's lots that can go wrong anyway buying a house if you're not financially prepared for poo poo to hit the fan. My friends going through divorces have had exponentially bigger shitshows with selling their houses than I did with mine. I don't think there's any guaranteed way to avoid problems, whether or not you're married. But my ex was a smart, kind, and reasonable dude and my history of amicable breakups made me more confident that we would do okay if that happened.

# ¿ May 22, 2023 20:41

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# ¿ May 15, 2024 04:55

moana: Jun 18, 2005; one of the more intellectual satire communities on the web

Acoustic fence + bamboo/hedge, if tthere's enough space, will do a hell of a lot to fix a noise problem.

# ¿ Jun 5, 2023 19:43

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Ask/Tell > Business, Finance, and Careers > House-buying thread - Why is everyone involved in this process so deeply stupid?

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