Coffee: crankin' it until I have a sloppy puck

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Goons with Spoons > Coffee: crankin' it until I have a sloppy puck

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

I've never made myself a coffee. Assuming I bought roasted beans what would I need in order to make myself a Mocha?

The OP was a bit over my head, but I did read it. I've gathered that I would need a grinder (Baratza Maestro) and a brewer (Aeropress). Am I missing anything else?

# ¿ Jul 9, 2016 03:03

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# ¿ Apr 28, 2024 10:47

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

Mu Zeta posted:

Mocha is chocolate with espresso and milk. So you're going to need an espresso machine like a Gaggia Classic and the Baratza grinder. Are you prepared to drop $650+ for some mocha?

No I am not. Thanks.

# ¿ Jul 9, 2016 03:34

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

mulls posted:

You could make something basically close enough with about $60 worth of gear. You'd need a Hario hand grinder and either a Moka pot (thicker coffee) or Aeropress (more convenient). It won't be as good as a real espresso, though.

If it doesn't taste like the real thing, I will regret the purchase. At the same time, I have ~1 cups of coffee per month, so it would be foolish to buy the real thing.

# ¿ Jul 9, 2016 16:34

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

Hexigrammus posted:

I`m going to offer a dissenting opinion and expose myself as a philistine with an uneducated palate. The best mochas I`ve had were from a shop that uses coffee from the drip pot and (good) chocolate milk from a local dairy. I think the quality of the chocolate is as important as the coffee once you get into sweet and milky.

Might take a bit of experimenting but you could find a recipe you like as much as or better than a commercial mocha using the gear mulls described.

Good point. I like to experiment (I always add dark chocolate to my Mocha anyway), and $60 is not the end of the world. Thanks thread.

# ¿ Jul 9, 2016 20:09

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

porktree posted:

Also an opportunity for me to snobbishly declare, gently caress mocha. You want some chocolaty loving coffee roast up some Yemen Mocha Raimi.

I've sampled wines that were reported to have notes of berries and chocolate, but I didn't taste any of it. Is Yemen Mocha Raimi as chocolaty as some of those wines are? Because my idea of "chocolaty" is to put (up to) half a bar of 85% or 90% chocolate in my Mocha.

# ¿ Jul 12, 2016 04:51

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

Hey guys,

I got a Capresso ec50 Espresso machine as a gift, and I would like to experiment with making Mocha, but I don't want to spring for a high quality grinder. What is the least poo poo option for buying ground beans? I know I shouldn't buy them that way, but given that I drink ~one cup of coffee a week, I can't justify the cost of a fine grinder.

I'm not trolling, I swear. If I get hooked in the poo poo gear I have, I'll consider upgrading to something more substantial later on.

# ¿ Apr 22, 2017 20:40

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

HappyHippo posted:

Failing that, go to a good coffee shop that sells beans and have them grind their beans for you. Tell them how you'll be preparing it so they'll know what grind to use.

This sounds like a good idea. I'll give that a try.

# ¿ Apr 22, 2017 21:06

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

TheJeffers posted:

The Capresso EC50 has a pressurized filter basket, so it's specifically designed not to care too much about grind quality. Any fine-ground coffee will probably work in that machine. Just don't expect miracles from the results. Illy and Lavazza are two commercial brands of ground coffee that claim to be suitable for use with espresso machines, so they'll probably work as well as you can expect given your setup.

The really arch answer that's not really relevant to you is that there is no one proper "espresso grind" and dialing in a good shot requires an expensive grinder with fine adjustments, full stop. However, that advice also presumes you're using a machine with a single-wall filter basket, which is not the case with the EC50. The suggestion to have a shop grind you some beans is fine enough given the circumstances, but again, be prepared for coffee that will quickly taste stale or otherwise "off" (again, probably not so big a deal given that you'll be putting milk and cocoa powder in it).

This should work, thanks.

I tried the machine with some coffee I took from my most recent stay at a Best Western and the result was drinkable - noticeably worse than what I get a work, but not piss either. I'm sure I'll manage to get something tastier with some refinements in beans and coffee/coco/milk ratio.

# ¿ Apr 22, 2017 22:41

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

TheJeffers posted:

The Capresso EC50 has a pressurized filter basket, so it's specifically designed not to care too much about grind quality. Any fine-ground coffee will probably work in that machine. Just don't expect miracles from the results ...

So, I tried it with pre-ground coffee from Trader Joe's (Ground Espresso Blend, Dark roast), and in both instances the result was more bitter than I prefer. I used relatively sweet chocolate for the hot chocolate I was mixing the espresso with, and the bitterness still dominated. I'm assuming that is because I am using pre-ground coffee? If the Espressor machine does not care too much about grind quality, could I get a cheap grinder (Cuisinart DBM 8) and get less bitter results?

# ¿ May 6, 2017 19:18

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

rockcity posted:

Pre ground coffee (assuming you mean it was packaged ground and not that you had it ground for you) is ground to for a drip machine. Even though you have a pressurized portafilter, you still need to be in the right ballpark of grind size to get a decent shot of espresso. Try buying beans that are whole and get them ground for an espresso machine which will be much much finer.

Yes, it was packaged ground. If I find a local place that will grind the beans for me, for how long can I keep those ground beans before they get bitter?

# ¿ May 6, 2017 21:13

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

rockcity posted:

Coffee doesn't get more bitter as it ages, it mostly just loses flavor. The subtle things in the coffee are what drop off the most. It just tastes muddied and bland.

Ideally if you have an espresso machine you should really have a grinder. Pre-ground coffee does espresso no service, even with pressurized portafilters. With a pressurized basket, you can get away with a Capresso Infinity if you want to keep cost down. They can be had for a decent price at Bed Bath and Beyond if you have a 20% off coupon.

I thought grinding coffee immediately stars a process where the coffee loses its flavor, so grinding it one day and drinking the next is a really bad idea. Perhaps "bitterness" was not the right word.

Let me ask this: If I had a budget of $200, could I buy a grinder that would give me a better mocha than (1) using pre-ground coffee and (2) grinding my own beans using a cheap Cuisinart DBM-8?

# ¿ May 7, 2017 02:36

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

Mu Zeta posted:

Any grinder is better than preground. The Baratza Virtuoso will do a decent job though it will take a lot of fiddling.

Noticeably better than a Cuisinart DBM-8?

# ¿ May 7, 2017 04:00

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

bizwank posted:

They're in the business of making grinders, not selling them; look to their multiple retailers for a good deal. They do occasionally have refurbished units on their site though.

Coffee does start to lose flavor once ground (just like spices) but it's nowhere near that extreme, and if you're mixing in a bunch of chocolate I doubt you'd notice the difference between a few days and a week. Are you using an Aeropress for all of this? Are you using the metal filter, controlling for water temp and dosing by weight? If not you aren't going to get anywhere close to a good, consistent shot of espresso from that device, and that might be your problem. If you want to throw money at this quest it should be towards a proper espresso machine, not a more expensive grinder.

No, I'm using a Capresso EC50 which I got as a gift. I know it probably sucks, but it was the least poo poo gift option. I would be happy to throw some money at this to get a decent Mocha out of it, but $200 is the absolute limit.

# ¿ May 7, 2017 17:51

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

bizwank posted:

That's as good as anything else you can get for under $300; are you temperature-surfing it at least?

I'm not doing anything beyond what is written in the manual. Fill with cold water, wait until a light turns a certain color, flip lever to 'make coffee'-mode. I'm pretty sure I am not even brewing the correct amount.

But alright, I'll play with it (beans and finding a place for grinding) more without sinking money into new gear and see what I get. Thanks.

# ¿ May 7, 2017 19:05

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

This noob is getting his first induction-compatible moka pot. I understand that I won't get real espresso, but hopefully it will give me a close-enough mocha without spending $1k. What's a good grinder (<$200, refurbished is fine) to pair it with?

# ¿ Jan 9, 2021 19:29

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

hypnophant posted:

Encore would be fine with a moka pot, you want it a bit coarser than espresso and the adjustability doesn�t matter as much

Thanks.

aldantefax posted:

buy 30 bags of Cafe Bustelo Supreme and just use that for the authentic Moka experience

I have ground coffee on the way, but I also wanted to experiment with different beans, and not all come ground, so I will need a grinder eventually.

# ¿ Jan 9, 2021 20:06

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

Ah, "authentic Moka experience" was supposed to be a joke. I'm sure I'll get it eventually.

# ¿ Jan 9, 2021 20:25

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

I had one of those! It was my gift for being with the company for 5 years. I had the choice between women's jewelry and that, so ...

I never got a good cup from that thing (which doesn't mean much), but I am much happier with the results from my moka pot, and I haven't even started grinding my own beans yet (though I will this weekend, using the encore).

# ¿ Jan 27, 2021 15:55

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

Thank you thread! I was not fully sold on a basic Moka pot and a Baratza Encore grinder, but once I found good beans, I finally saw the light. SoCal is getting warm, so I did my first half-assed attempt at cold brewing and it was a :pcgaming:

success. This summer is going to be refreshing!

# ¿ Apr 19, 2021 00:52

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

I rotate through a number of things: nut butter (I make my own, each month is different), chocolate+speculoos, matcha green tea flavored almond milk, Saigon cinnamon, Kahlua.

# ¿ May 2, 2021 15:18

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

If I like a coffee from Ethiopia � Bedhatu Jibicho (Strawberry, White Tea, Sweet), what others can explore that are equally fruity sweet in a subtle way?

# ¿ Dec 3, 2021 02:30

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

eke out posted:

is it a natural or washed

from googling looks like a natural. if you like the strawberry angle i suggest anything people are selling from Shantawene that's a natural (i know happymug has a cheap one and i'm sure lots of other roasters do as well), i've had a handful of different lots from there that've all trended towards that flavor profile

Outstanding, thanks!

# ¿ Dec 3, 2021 03:48

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

If I am enjoying my baratza encore and stove top moka pot (along with a variety of beans), how would I determine if I am missing out on anything (a better grinder or a fancy espresso machine)?

# ¿ Jul 29, 2022 02:04

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

And I can trust a shop staffed by college bros to pour a good shot?

My "morning cup" is the full output of a 6-cup moka pot, and I worry that the lower strength of a pour over will disappoint me.

# ¿ Jul 29, 2022 02:34

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

Pilfered Pallbearers posted:

Moka pot is not espresso.

I know.

Pilfered Pallbearers posted:

You want a place that has that that looks like you walked into Brooklyn or Portland usually.

I've never been to either place, so please elaborate.

# ¿ Jul 29, 2022 02:40

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

Yeah, I have two local roasters whose stuff I want to inject straight into my veins.

# ¿ Jul 30, 2022 01:59

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

People recommend using filtered water for the best coffee experience. Does that still apply to a Moka pot where water is evaporated, which is a form of filtering water?

# ¿ Aug 22, 2022 00:52

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

That's right! Thanks!

# ¿ Aug 22, 2022 01:14

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

For a camping trip where space so limited that instant coffee is the only option, what are people's recommendations?

# ¿ Oct 29, 2022 01:54

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

cptn_dr posted:

Camping? Surely this is your chance to use a bripe like God and Paul Bunyan intended.

LOL

Thanks for the suggestions. I could have sworn that one of the usual coffee roasters had an instant coffee, but of course I can't find it anymore.

# ¿ Oct 29, 2022 03:43

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

i own every Bionicle posted:

Cometeer will taste great, it�s expensive and should be refrigerated or frozen though.

I will be on a glacier, so everything will freeze for free.

Any opinions on single-serve coffee pouches from counter culture for example?

# ¿ Oct 29, 2022 17:32

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

JohnCompany posted:

I just moved and brought the Verve single-serve instant pouches for the first few days, they're totally solid coffee. I've also had reanimator pouches in the past if an east coast roaster is easier to get.

Cool, thanks.

# ¿ Oct 30, 2022 15:17

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

Had my first cup of instant coffee in 15 years. This poo poo's a war crime.

# ¿ Nov 4, 2022 03:18

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

Try some anaerobic beans next to get mind blown all over again.

# ¿ Nov 8, 2022 15:26

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

theHUNGERian posted:

Had my first cup of instant coffee in 15 years. This poo poo's a war crime.

After a few days of drinking this crap (Sprouts instant coffee light roast), I will adjust the rating to simply "bad". Today I gave Starbucks Via Instant Pike Place a try and it tastes like a rotten carcass, definitely worse than just "bad".

# ¿ Nov 10, 2022 03:45

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

What is the thread's opinion for a machine + grinder for legit espresso at <$1k? I am not terribly intimidated by a manual machine (Flair 58), but one reviewer stated that a Breville Bambino is a better first espresso machine.

# ¿ Feb 12, 2023 20:34

theHUNGERian: Feb 23, 2006

hypnophant posted:

Seconding this, especially the part about spending more on the grinder. If I had to start over with that budget, I would just buy the niche (around $650 shipped to the states, at current exchange rates) and stalk ebay for a deal on a used gaggia or silvia, which seem to go for under $300 pretty regularly. That leaves ~$50 for a tamper, knockbox, and a few other accessories.

Side note: I have a feeling someone is going to get a great deal on this little guy. I haven't used one but the CC1 has a solid, but low-key, reputation, with some nicer features than the gaggia/silvia at a similar price point. The description says they're having problems with steam after 3 years which 9 times out of 10 means they haven't been descaling it enough (or at all) and there's buildup in the boiler or wand, a very easy problem to fix.

Thanks for the input.

How much attention should I pay to pressure. Hoffman and others are hellbent on 9 bars (although others argue that it should have a non-constant profile), but a lot of machines either don't have a gauge or a gauge with no way of making adjustments to the pressure if it were to be off (unless of course I void the warranty). Or should I be adjusting the pressure by adjusting the grind size and tamping?

# ¿ Feb 13, 2023 03:55