Snowdens Secret posted:

You guys's boot camp sounds way more awesome than ours. Driving tanks???

Martello posted:

You'd think so, but plenty of agencies and even some furrin militaries use the P90 and there's isn't much more of a handguard on that thing, and I haven't heard any stories about people shooting their fingers off. But yeah, at least one dude will.

Martello posted:

Yeah, I know it's the PDR because I posted it saying "this is the Magpul PDR." I was comparing the P90 for length and layout, since it's quite similar. I used to have a PS90 myself, since I'm also a retard. I sold it before moving to Germany, which I wish I didn't do. I have a number of friends who would have happily kept it for me, including friends in NY where the 50-rd magazine is horribly illegal. Live and learn I guess.


The gun they're talking about is the military version, the Mx4. It's select fire, so it's not all that different from the MP5 in terms of capabilities. I've never fired one (but I have fired the MP5) but I assume the rifle-like layout reduces recoil, and since it feeds through the grip that gives you more barrel length in a similar overall package. I'd still rather have a P90 or something like the PDR, since both are harder-hitting than a 9mm (and yes this is actually a thing) and the P90 has that insane ammo capacity.

Mad Dragon posted:

What the hell is a jacking? Did they make him do push ups until his arms really hurt? Did they take him behind the bike rack and beat him unmercifully with their fists? Did they jack him off?

Mr. Nice! posted:

To please the court we call on our next witness to explain the differences between pedophilia and ephebophilia.

Caconym posted:

No way?


That's after carrying it out of the tent on the shovel...

Cojawfee posted:

What the gently caress are you driving that gets 6mpg? You can go on craiglist and buy a honda for 2000 dollars that gets way better mileage than that.

50 Foot Ant posted:

awesomeness

anne frank fanfic posted:

You killed a man and your post was long and boring too and kept going on and on and it was real bad. And you killed a man in real life or like to make it seem like you did by typing about how you killed a man on the internet.

Casimir Radon posted:

The Hurt Locker is poo poo, but it's a marked improvement over Blown Away.

50 Foot Ant posted:

So let's talk about idiots on a wider scope. This will be a LONG post, but I'm kind of compelled to put it in here, with the idiots, because it was idiocy at the highest levels down to the newest private.

50 Foot Ant posted:

joat mon posted:

It's a convenient dosage unit for gas chamber training - just toss them on a hotplate.






50FA: You're in a semi-trailer, sweating in the dark when all of a sudden-

Troubador: Is this the training now?

50FA: Yes. You're in a semi-trailer, sweating in the dark when all of a sudden you look down-

Troubador: But how come I'd be there?

50FA: Maybe you've hosed up, maybe you wanted to go to college, who knows? You look down and you see a CS capsule, Troubador, it's billowing thick smoke up at you-

Troubador: CS capsule, what's that?

50FA: Know what tear gas is?

Troubador: Of course.

50FA: Same thing.

Troubador: I've never seen a CS capsule. (pause) But I understand what you mean.

Troubador: Do you make up these training exercises, 50FA, or do they plan them for you?

50FA: The CS flows over your face, your eyes burning in the hot darkness. Through the slobber and snot you want to don and clear but you can't, not without giving your name, rank and social, but you're not even trying to take that breath, Troubador.

Troubador: What do you mean I'm not trying?

50FA: I mean, you're not trying. Why is that Troubador? (pause) It’s just training, Troubador. In answer to your query, it's planned for me. It's training, designed to provide pictures of you with strings of snot down to your knees.. (pause) Shall we continue? Describe in single words, only the good things that come in to your mind about : the Army.

Troubador: The Army?

50FA: Yeah.

Troubador: Let me tell you about the Army...

wiskibubbles posted:

This is what a A1C/E-3 Did in my Unit:

So this Kid first was a terrible Mechanic had no grasp of his job. He was Comm/Nav and I knew more about his job then he did as a Hydraulics guy. He took forever to get trained and was always sick for something. Nobody paid much attention to this kid being he was worthless to the unit. We gave him the chances to learn and put some of the best dudes we had out there to train him. He just kept missing work for "Doctor appts and Surgeries". Every time he was on quarters or had a surgery he had some paper work with him and otherwise we trusted him because he never lied to us. Then we found out on a complete he was lying about all of it. He never had a single surgery. All of his problems were made up and he was scamming the Gov't for a paycheck for the most part. This all got caught on a joke by his boss.
Basically this kid didn't didn't show up or do anything for about a total of 6 months of his One and a half years on the base and almost got away with it. If it was for an old cynical boss making a bad joke. He got almost no punishment out of it as well.

Then my favorite: We had a stabbing on our flight line. Basically 2 kids were arguing about who's car was faster and better. Started slap boxing and next thing that happens is this young kid pulls out a 6 inch butterfly knife and stabs this kid in the arm. While a 130 was about to take off with Air Crew in seats. This kid didn't even get a BCD. Most of the punishment he got I don't remember since I was on the road during the Court martial

Ultimate Shrek Fan posted:

Hydraulics in -40C temperatures don't really work too well.

BexGu posted:

I remember renting a movie called The Beast in the late 90s about a Russian tank crew terrorizing the local Afghans. One of the Russians was getting drunk off the brake fluid (" Added a little nuts and spices, its not bad!") who know it was based off reality?

Derek Dominoe posted:

Alkaline injuries, including a lot of battery-related ones, are almost always worse than acid injuries for various reasons.

Casimir Radon posted:

Spent a stupid amount of time finding it.