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I have more sympathy than most posters for your situation. The economy is lovely. More and more grads are going to have no choice but to live at home. I think the "my house my rules" attitude is tremendously counter productive. My suggestion is that you sit down and try to negotiate some clear boundaries with your parents. Your mom gets final say on the TV in the main room, but what you watch in your room is your business. You put some of your savings toward food and utilities, you can have friends over until 8 on a weekday, 11 on a weekend. Whatever works. Note: for this to work, you will should be willing to make some real concessions for example selling your comic books or laptop or whatever to help pay for things. This does two things. One, it give everyone clear expectations. This is great because everybody knows where that line is so you can stay away from it. Two, it keeps you from getting lumped in with your brother when he starts things. Your brother mouths of to your mom, only he gets punished. Hopefully your parents are reasonable ish or at least recognize that they will need support in their old age.
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Jan 31, 2013 20:23
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bunnybean posted:I don't understand why the OP's mother should have to compromise about anything, ever. Her house, her rules. You're an adult; if you don't like it, couch surf or go to a shelter. Otherwise, use it as motivation for why you need to grow up. There is no reason why she should have to feel whatever it is that she feels when "dirty imagery" or whatever winds up in her home. It's her home and she's paying for it, and she has no obligation to care for her adult children. OP's parents are making huge sacrifices in their own lives to take care of their children; there is absolutely no reason why those children cannot make small sacrifices to keep the peace. I have two theories on this. The first is that the distribution of wealth is largely arbitrary. Hard work plays a part in your income, but so do luck, aptitude, inherited wealth, when you are born, and a good education. Ideally, in a society with as much abundance as the US, the OP's basic material needs would be taken care of as long as he was making an attempt at productive work. In the absence of such safety nets, I think it's a parent's duty to pick up that responsibility as much as possible. You can also look at it as an intergenerational bargain. The parent agrees to take care of the child until the child is self sufficient. The child takes care of the parent when the parent is no longer self sufficient.
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Jan 31, 2013 21:29
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Benny the Snake posted:As much as it was wrong for my mom to hit Danny, Jim pointed out that there is no equality between us and our parents. They are still within their right to hit us when we're being little shits. And to call Mom out on assault when she insists she'll do the same if me and Danny scrap is bull. I'm not their judge, their equal, or their friend. I'm their son, first and foremost. This is all wrong. Maybe you aren't the judge of your parents, but a Judge is the judge of your parents. If they do something illegal and harmful, you need to call the police and get a real judge involved. There's nothing wrong with your mother supporting the two of you (and maybe your dad.). For some reason, people still think that you can totally support yourself at 18 or whatever and that just isn't the world we live in anymore. Also, it sounds like your uncle takes your mom's side pretty hard. I'm not surprised your dad didn't want a boss like that. Jizznastics posted:Wow, a adult man tells his mother to gently caress her self and shes in the wrong when she hits him. Go gently caress yourself.
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Feb 3, 2013 14:35
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Benny the Snake posted:Another concern is that by applying for fast food/warehouse work, I'm essentially fishing in an over-crowded pond. Sure I could jump right in to either handling packages or making fries but there's much more people reguardless of education status that I'd have to compete with for the same job. Besides I just got an response from a customer service position I applied to-they want to do an interview. I think my prospects are looking up. I'd rather work in a warehouse than customer service. They look identical on a resume. The pay is almost identical. Neither is very flexible in scheduling around your internship. Neither are mentally challenging. You have to deal with angry and wrote people all day in CS. In a warehouse, you just have to move everything from point a to point b. The guy at your internship probably means well, but I don't think he appreciates the current job market (poo poo is bad take what you can get) or your situation (I.e. you need to move out yesterday.) Edit: Oh yeah, you are never going to be overqualified with a B.A. in English. Sorry kid. BrainParasite fucked around with this message at 14:51 on Feb 5, 2013 |
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Feb 5, 2013 14:48
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cname posted:This is all wrong. Customer service is a massive field, which spans across all different types of companies. It's experience which translates across multiple industries. If you can pay your dues as a CS rep for a poo poo company with a poo poo product and lots of pissed off customers. Eventually upgrade to a company, which offers a better product and has a far more civilized method of assisting customers. It's pretty obvious I was talking about an entry level job not doing CS for a complicated technical product or working in a warehouse full of bees or anything. A career in customer service would clearly beneficial for the OP. I just don't see the benefit of an entry level customer service position over other jobs unless that's what he's going for Really, the important thing is that the OP find a job, any job that will get him out of his mom's house.
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Feb 5, 2013 19:04
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Benny the Snake posted:No it was Farmer's. There's an office down the street from me. You do realize that people actually need insurance right. It's not like a new car or whatever they sell to confused old folks over the phone. Stop being dumb.
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Mar 16, 2013 17:36
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Double post disregard.
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Mar 16, 2013 18:04
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Dr_Amazing posted:It's true he's probably going to have to open up the search a little. But unless he's like the only person in the country that can do a job, no one is going to pay for an air ticket just to get him in for an interview. Are there any jobs at all that would do this for anything outside of a one of a kind engineer or surgeon or something? Is it really something that happens often? Relocation and paid travel expenses for an interview are common after a certain point in your career. BA in English + successful internship is not that point.
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Mar 23, 2013 13:41
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Jeffrey posted:Again, any company that really wants to hire him is probably willing to give him enough money to relocate. I'm not talking about further away fast food jobs, obviously they have to be a step above that before they'll consider it. However asking a new employer for enough money to relocate closer (just security deposit lets say) is not unreasonable. It is not very much compared to a person's wage and I'm sure lots of places are willing to do it. I don't know what country you live in or what industry you work in, but this is not the norm for most entry level positions.
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Mar 24, 2013 02:10
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Benny the Snake posted:It's not exactly "15 min. from home". I'm just trying to figure out locations to where I could best coordinate a route to where I could get from home to work and back again without having to commute for so long. I had to commute via buses to school. Took me an hour and a half and I had to hop three buses. The simpler and less time, the better. 1.5 hours is a long but reasonable commute for a grown up job, especially if you're taking public transport. That time on the bus, that's you time. You can read or write or look out the window. Maybe listen to music.
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Mar 24, 2013 11:44
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ClemenSalad posted:I know! Its almost like obsessing over those numbers can be misleading and counterproductive. Are all the unemployed lazy layabouts or just English majors?
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Mar 24, 2013 22:39
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ClemenSalad posted:Haha a liberal arts joke really? I'm sure you could find similar nits to pick with the other 12 million unemployed Americans.
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Mar 24, 2013 23:24
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fork bomb posted:It was only in the last >5 yrs that I was taught in school that it is proper to italicize instead of quote book titles. But I am much older than Benny, so I'm not sure how much leeway he deserves. Underlines were the right way on typewriters and probably during a lot of the transition to computer, so it depends on when you last were taught about this/ had to read a stylebook. Benny, because he wants to write for a living, should be familiar with a recent edition of a recent stylebook.
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Apr 23, 2013 11:13
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Xenocides posted:English major haver checking in again. I'm genuinely curious, why do so many fiction writers say that being a good reader is the most important skill to be a good writer?
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Apr 24, 2013 21:29
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Geoj posted:Unless you're talking about a position requiring a security clearance this is the point where I'd close the browser session or tear up the application. What's next - "employment contingent upon HR being given unfettered access to your place of residence for a 24 hour period"? It is not illegal on the Federal level, just like asking about race, veteran status, etc isn't technically illegal. It does open you up to lawsuits. As far as I can tell, asking for a Facebook password is like asking about every protected class at once. I'm surprised there hasn't been a massive EEO suit yet. Ursine Asylum posted:I've always just used the litmus test of "Does grandma want to know about this" in the first place, but I may just be a weirdo in that I don't post drunken escapades all over the internet in the first place. v If I were a lady and pregnant, I might tell my Facebook friends. I would not tell a potential employer. v  v
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Apr 29, 2013 11:49
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Benny the Snake posted:I make no excuses: I told my co-worker I'd cover for his shift then I turned around and tried to pin it on someone else hoping that the managers wouldn't figure out my shenanigans and they eventually did. I'm not saying that me and him are on bad terms; I have no idea. I'm just saying I wouldn't be receptive towards covering for a co-worker if I was in his position. What the hell Benny? What the hell?
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Jun 24, 2013 13:20
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So have you looked into therapy since whenever?
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Jun 24, 2013 18:33
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Benny would you like to do a podcast where I ruthlessly mock the things you say and think? Before you answer, look at how well Karl Pilkington is doing these days.
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Jun 25, 2013 19:04
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Benny could be trying to find freelance writing work around his Target schedule.
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Jun 26, 2013 11:54
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Wow, putting an interview off by two weeks to put it after a major holiday? Have you considered my podcast offer seriously?
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Jun 27, 2013 18:47
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Benny buy a suit, wear a suit.
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Jul 2, 2013 22:58
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Hey, can we get back to berating a semi functional adult into some sort of self sufficiency.
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Jul 12, 2013 01:07
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DO NOT QUIT TARGET TO WORK WITH YOUR DAD. DO WORK WITH YOUR DAD WITHOUT QUITTING TARGET.Jizznastics posted:Why hasn't benny moved out of his house yet!?!? if hes found work theires no reason why he can not go out and by himself a used work van to stay in for a couple of months until he can really save up for some sort of apartment type gig. At this point I don't see how beny is saving any money, especially if hes paying rent and Bull poo poo to his parents You are the dumbest person in this thread.
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Jul 13, 2013 09:34
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Hyzenth1ay posted:(read his post again, I do believe it's tongue-in-cheek) Read his previous posts in this thread. That guy legit believes Benny should enlist and/or live in a van.
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Jul 13, 2013 14:05
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Your bitterness is probably a natural and justified emotion. It sucks having bad parents and it sucks having to live with them. If you get another appointment you really should talk about dealing with your violent fantasies. Those could be real trouble if acted upon. As for your sister. Ideally she'd be able to explain her reasons and you'd be able to voice your concerns without being judgmental. Practically, your family seems unable to communicate without being totally toxic to each other and your thinking right now isn't the best. I don't know.
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Jul 28, 2013 12:16
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natetimm posted:I added it myself but I wouldn't be shocked to find out it's true. Something about the content of his reading and viewing habits drives his bible-thumping parents nuts. I'm going to go out on a limb and guess it's giant anime tits on catgirls or something similar. I'm sure he just reads them for the storytelling, though. Benny is a weird enough guy without you projecting.
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Aug 12, 2013 14:34
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Benny the Snake posted:Okay I just talked with my uncle The Captain and him and my other uncle Bob told me that City of Chino should call me for a test if I'm going on for the next step. So either I get a call for a test or a letter in the mail saying "We're sorry". Right now, I'm hoping it's the latter. I've been talking to HR and they told me I should've gotten a response by now. So I'm hoping they sent out the rejections first. Benny go back over this post and figure out your major usage mistake.
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Aug 18, 2013 01:36
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in_cahoots posted:I'm honestly confused as to whether he wants the city job or not. I feel like you and I are the only ones in this thread that know the definition of "latter."
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Aug 18, 2013 20:13
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You have not even been taking your medication long enough for it too make that much of a difference. DO NOT STOP TAKING YOUR MEDICATION.
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Aug 26, 2013 22:46
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Coffee Wolf posted:step one: Learn German The Amish aren't allowed to use copy machines, so you're good to go in PA and OH.
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Sep 6, 2013 16:20
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D3XW5e1bTF0&feature=youtube_gdata_player ?
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Sep 10, 2013 23:14
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gently caress the ROW posted:Actually, public shaming is a great way to stop bigots and fat people from being that way. You are terrible and wrong. http://www.plosone.org/article/info%3Adoi%2F10.1371%2Fjournal.pone.0070048
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Sep 16, 2013 11:10
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Araenna posted:Pretty sure you should google what the guy you quoted told you to say. It seems like "I love you with all of my heart" is a valid translation of that phrase many Spanish speaking places. A quick Google indicates that quiero really is the more appropriate word to use with family (depending on location), even though a literal translation to English sounds weird.
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Sep 17, 2013 11:23
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Sawboss Jones posted:It's not about Pokémon being childish, it's about Benny sleeping all day and playing video games while people pretend he's making any headway towards becoming the functional adult he needs to be. He sleeps all day, posts mostly about games and stuff, all the while avoiding this thread where people expect him to check in with news of some meaningful progress. I think we could wait for the medication to equalize a bit before we abandon all hope.
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Oct 28, 2013 21:47
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Sawboss Jones posted:We could, but should we? Lots of people go through depression; Schizophrenia is a whole different ball of wax from low level depression.
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Oct 28, 2013 22:58
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Benny the Snake posted:I'm also going to go back to school and get my Masters and become a professor. Or a librarian. I'd like to be either. That's my immediate plan anyway. Nooooooooo
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Dec 26, 2013 11:52
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How hard would it be to get certified to teach in California? A PhD, let alone being a professor, is an unrealistic goal at this point, but you might be able to teach elsewhere.
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Dec 26, 2013 18:55
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Benny, take this from a grad school drop out. You aren't ready. You are going for all the wrong reasons. Your time would be better served by looking harder for a job or getting some sort of professional certificate. Anything but grad school really. Also take a look at jobs in North and South Dakota. There are more jobs than warm bodies up there, so you might get lucky.
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Jan 5, 2014 12:30
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Emasculatrix posted:Career counseling and academic advising are different things, by different employees, in different offices. Make sure you go to the Career Center. Your academic advisor isn't the person you should be talking to. It depends. If Benny is going to talk to a member of the English department who does academic advising, he may get a better picture of what graduate school is and what you can get out of it, and how the post grad job market really looks. He might even be able to do some networking. Career services can smooth out your resume, give you job hunting tips and maybe do some mock interviews, but may not know as much about how your field works or where to go with your degree.
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Jan 8, 2014 12:59
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vxskud posted:I have trouble believing you can't get even a little work through a temp agency, I've worked for several over the years and most of the time they had a place for me within a few days at most. This has not been my experience or the experience of others I know who have tried to temp.
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Jan 30, 2014 06:16
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