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Well, this pissed me off so I figure it's suited for the thread. Because man oh man did I not expect to be asked to commit industrial espionage and theft of company assets on my literal first day. Backstory: Interned at this place a year ago on their systems team. Helpdesk and (very) basic sysadmin stuff, but it paid pretty well, I enjoyed the work, and it had a great company culture. I just got a full time gig with them, the ink literally isn't even dry on the forms, I got the offer yesterday. Now, last summer while on the boat party with oodles of free mojitos, I made friends with someone in a different department. We grab dinner and hang out semi-regularly. She left the company a month or two ago, and I made the stupid, stupid mistake of telling her that I was back at work here. See, she somehow managed to negotiate, as part of her severance, the very fancy Alienware laptop that we had purchased for her and her work. This isn't normally done, but fine, whatever, she negotiated with legal and we're giving her the laptop. Except she messages me on loving facebook that there are "personal" files on the laptop that she really wants to keep. Obviously, we have to wipe the laptop before we give it to her, a fact which she knows. So my (soon to be former) friend tries to loving bribe me with "lunch and drink tabs" to bring in an external loving hard drive to get all of the data on her laptop before we wipe it. What the hell? She's sure as hell not getting that data now.
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# ¿ Aug 4, 2017 15:05 |
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# ¿ May 15, 2024 03:47 |
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Methylethylaldehyde posted:Best case: It's porn staring her. The real worst case is that it's illegal porn, but either way I'm not touching poo poo, documenting everything, and reporting this to my manager the second I can. Sure, it'll nuke the friendship, but honestly if I wouldn't lend this gal $100 I'm sure as hell not willing to commit crimes for her. E: She loving told me it includes source code data The Iron Rose fucked around with this message at 15:30 on Aug 4, 2017 |
# ¿ Aug 4, 2017 15:23 |
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Man I should be a police informant because apparently people are just loving dying to confess their criminal conspiracies to me. Reported that poo poo, hands waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay the gently caress off this now.
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# ¿ Aug 4, 2017 15:47 |
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Oh man I missed a boatload of frantic messages that she sent me at 5 in the morning, assuring me that I would "in no way be violating my security obligations." Bitch this is source code you wrote for us. Even if it was just vacation photos or a dick pic collection, I'd be violating my security obligations because I have no way to verify that she hasn't masked the files in some way. Anyways mostly panicking because our lawyer said they'd have to do a wipe, which probably explains why she wanted me to not only clone her hard drive, but also export code she wrote over the internet to a server in her control. She wanted me to do this from my loving office. Shockingly, no one here really seems to care that much. Apparently since they're wiping it anyways it's whatever. My hands are clean though. Took screenshots of the messages, drafted an email detailing everything and sent it to my manager and to my personal email account. If someone hangs for this, it sure as hell won't be me. My first day! Jesus. E: I can't wait to see what she sends me when she realizes that I reported her. Don't worry, I'm a generous gal. I'll share with the class. The Iron Rose fucked around with this message at 16:32 on Aug 4, 2017 |
# ¿ Aug 4, 2017 16:25 |
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anthonypants posted:Keep up with this, don't ever stop demonstrating intent to destroy the data, but give her the files. This was her offer to me, and I quote: "It's convenient that you're the current hardware master, this is technically social engineering. Your cooperation would be met with much personal respect and likely several several lunch and drink tabs." I'm actually insulted that she thinks that I'm so easily bought. Gee, thanks. I'll definitely be really happy I have your personal respect from the inside of a cell.
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# ¿ Aug 4, 2017 18:35 |
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And what do you know, I just learned that I'm getting a $5000 raise. Because they didn't think the previous salary I was quoted when I accepted the job literally yesterday was "fair to me." I think that might just be the quickest raise ever received on record. Man now I'm really curious about that source code. The Iron Rose fucked around with this message at 19:19 on Aug 4, 2017 |
# ¿ Aug 4, 2017 19:15 |
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MF_James posted:Lol at people not keeping personal archives of everything you've done at work. "Your Honor, I'd like to submit my posting history on the 'dead and gay comedy forum' Something Awful as evidence."
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# ¿ Aug 4, 2017 20:23 |
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Update on the dumbest corporate spy ever. Apparently we're still considering giving her some of the data on the laptop, per an overheard conversation this morning. So either this was a test (very unlikely), or people care even less than I thought about security and data integrity. I mean, end of the day I care less about security than I care about being seen to care about security so gently caress it, but man. I was and still am going to burn a friendship over this, the least you can do is take it seriously when I report a felony.
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# ¿ Aug 8, 2017 20:07 |
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Bit of an anti-poo poo pissing you off post but related so gently caress it. We homebrewed our own ticketing system, intranet, workflow management, internal news, task management et cetera. Everyone, from PMs to Sales to Helpdesk and SysAdmins get tasks which indicate what they need to accomplish and by when. Anyone can create a task and assign it to anyone else, so whenever someone would normally create a ticket they can just create a task, put it in our systems queue, and then any systems employee can pull that task to their own personal workflow, or managers can assign tasks to people. There's subtasks which can be assigned to different people built into the system too. We use google hangouts to communicate with everyone, it's great. The only time I've ever sent an email, whether as a contractor, intern, or employee was to communicate with a third party and when I was documenting Stupidest Corporate Spy. The only time I get emails is for automated poo poo, task notification, and when I signed my contracts. The whole thing works super well, it looks super slick, it performs... okayish. It also lets you search users and has a seating map which is extraordinarily convenient for me, since all of our helpdesk work is internal. I shudder to think of the cost, and the whole company is built around. No real way to implement this sorta thing unless you're doing it from the ground up in a fairly small environment though. Still, I'm dreading the ticketing systems that await me in future careers. The pizza lunches every wednesday and the open bar boat cruise tomorrow night add to the appeal too. Downside is that lol you will never get out of the office by 5.
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# ¿ Aug 10, 2017 06:27 |
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Motherfucker. We're giving her the laptop without wiping it. My manager is going to go through it and delete anything company related. I insisted on not touching that machine ever, so I'm in the clear. But man we're never going to employ this person again, just wipe it and have done with it.
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# ¿ Aug 10, 2017 14:55 |
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poo poo that pisses me off: New Hire tasks that come in at 2:30pm on a Friday for an employee starting monday. gently caress offfffffffffffff
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# ¿ Aug 11, 2017 21:36 |
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"Due to the short notice of this request, I cannot guarantee a system will be ready for Frank McDickhead upon his arrival. We'll try our best." aka lol I ain't doing poo poo, gently caress you, get your requests in on time. ...I mean I'm still encrypting and setting up their laptops because I'm a big softie and their requirements are Office and nothing else. I'm sure I'll be cured of that generosity soon enough.
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# ¿ Aug 11, 2017 22:19 |
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Not having any RDP solution. Seriously I have to go to every single user's desk individually, and when there's 700 employees that's not always easy even with a seating map! Seriously the only RDP we do support is through loving zoom room conferencing. You have to have the user log in to Zoom through our SSO, create a video or audio conference and then request screen sharing. It's ridiculous.
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# ¿ Aug 16, 2017 20:20 |
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Thanks Ants posted:https://www.unidesk.com/support/learn/2.5.5/administer/manage_desktops_and_templates/admin_desktops_remote_assistance We're ostensibly implementing SCCM and jamf which should solve a bunch of problems eventually but lol if that'll happen anytime soon.
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# ¿ Aug 16, 2017 20:45 |
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Things pissing me off at my partner's workplace - A mission critical computer running windows XP with a corrupted system32 with adware installed, with security updates deferred since 2013. Needless to say, there are no backups.
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# ¿ Aug 16, 2017 21:58 |
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The Iron Rose posted:Things pissing me off at my partner's workplace - I was wrong. Mission critical server running on a commercial windows install. Malware in system32. A corrupted system 32. The windows installation didn't update from Vista properly, so it's somehow been installing updates for both Windows 7 and Windows Vista. This is a financial office where privileged and confidential client information is transferred daily, including plaintext social insurance numbers in unencrypted or secured PDFs. There are no backups, and the aged luddite boss thinks everything is fine because "so what if we can't download things, what's the problem?" Not to worry though! My partner, who's a linguistic major who's computer proficient but not techy, has been tasked with migrating this computer to Windows 10. I'm not even sure how old it is, but 10+ years if the fact that it came with Windows loving Vista.
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# ¿ Aug 16, 2017 23:34 |
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Rudager posted:I can understand giving users local admin rights because of stupid software poo poo, but domain admin? Jesus. I don't even have real domain access until I'm finished my probation period. I can bind, but that's about it. The Iron Rose fucked around with this message at 14:40 on Aug 18, 2017 |
# ¿ Aug 18, 2017 14:37 |
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We use Fog and DeployStudio, both of which are perfectly fine. Fog's a bit feature light, though. God I can't wait until we get SCCM up and running.
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# ¿ Aug 22, 2017 14:56 |
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Shared this with the office. It doesn't have the throughput we require, but that's what the meth is for.
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# ¿ Aug 23, 2017 20:24 |
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Tailored Sauce posted:The IT division wants to have a summer party for the employees, however HR doesn't want us to have any alcohol because "people who don't drink alcohol might get offended". I guess we could eat cake and do team-building stuff like trust falls or some poo poo. yaaaay. lol we got an open bar Unfortunately, and this is a thing pissing me off, we have no HR department. This is a bad combination when you have hundreds of very drunk employees all in the same place at once.
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# ¿ Aug 24, 2017 02:12 |
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Sickening posted:I can't read this in any other way than the manager is stealing them. That's because the manager is stealing them.
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# ¿ Aug 24, 2017 14:30 |
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Huh, that's serediptious. I'm doing storage room cleanout too today. Nowhere near as bad as yours, but unscrewing 75 odd server drives from their stupid screwed on mounting brackets is noooooot fun. Especially when you have to do it all by hand with a tiny screwdriver
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# ¿ Aug 24, 2017 17:06 |
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Sirotan posted:The good news: Told my boss today that I could not go to the conference with him next month due to some conflicting plans that I had "forgotten about". He seemed fine with this. You are definitely going to have to relocate your conference.
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# ¿ Aug 29, 2017 18:01 |
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Getting the re-hire task and the departure task for the same employee at the same time. Which would normally mean I just close the departure ticket and ignore it safely, but unfortunately I got the departure ticket yesterday and the newhire today... So allllllll the work I spent removing spanning, gsuite, AD, et cetera now needs to be undone
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# ¿ Aug 30, 2017 20:09 |
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The boss is letting everyone go at 3:30... But truecrypt won't finish encrypting until 5
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# ¿ Sep 1, 2017 20:26 |
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Due diligence says stay, but not giving a gently caress says go... Eh, truecrypt will still encrypt even when logged into the newhire's domain account. So gently caress it, buddy will just need to deal with a strange and heretofore unforeseen message when he comes in after the weekend.
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# ¿ Sep 1, 2017 20:46 |
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Sickening posted:That is the spirit! regretfully, thanks to incompetent facilities people the actual literal desk setup is going to take me till 5:30 fuuuuuuuuuuuuck
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# ¿ Sep 1, 2017 21:44 |
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Well, we have a freelancer sitting at her desk without a system because her supervisor failed to inform us that there was a newhire starting, however temporary, until the day she arrived. Guess she's just going too have to go without until this afternoon!
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# ¿ Sep 5, 2017 14:27 |
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lol it gets better. supervisor's manager is indignant because he did, in fact, submit a newhire ticket and therefore she should be set up. He submitted it at 5:31pm on Friday, right before labour day weekend. I actually can't decide if that's better or worse.
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# ¿ Sep 5, 2017 15:19 |
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Fuuuuuck keychain and AD. In other news I just spent literally an hour with a user to install a printer and change her password. The printer took five minutes.
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# ¿ Sep 5, 2017 22:23 |
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Humphreys posted:Had a weird one come across my desk that is starting to piss me off. DBAN and DoD wipe, then reimage? Unless I'm missing something.
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# ¿ Sep 6, 2017 03:16 |
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Well, time to pay the butcher's bill. Last week our entire synology hosed up and wiped everyone's permissions to everything. We sorted most of it, but the first ticket about missing permissions just came in, with rumours of more to follow. We're gunna be dealing with this for aaaaaaages.
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# ¿ Sep 6, 2017 16:57 |
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Dick Trauma posted:A strange turn of events this morning. I'd written out a long post but there's not enough drama to support it. Glad to see that something positive happened? I think? In other news, my god installing .cab files manually is a gigantic pain in the rear end. Getting 8 dell laptops ready to give to charity, and our Fog server we use for imaging windows machines is having some drive mounting woes. For reference, in case anyone else needs to suffer through that: https://www.1337admin.org/tutorials/manual-installation-of-a-dell-driver-pack-on-a-local-machine/
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# ¿ Sep 6, 2017 18:23 |
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The Fool posted:Stop using Fog. Soon. Soon we'll have MDT and SCCM. Of course, that's been "soon" for a good few months now...
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# ¿ Sep 6, 2017 18:50 |
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Sickening posted:Are you not the person to setup MDT? Unless your images are extremely complex you could get it up and working in like a hour. The best part is setting it up and then moving it later is a breeze. You don't even need the sccm counterpart until you are ready for it. I wish! It'd be a fun project. We have a big team of 12 people though, and it's not mine, it belongs to one of our senior sysadmins. Who's great and smart, but workloads being what they are implementation of anything takes forever and a day. Also I'm 21 and this is my first IT job, and I'm basically doing helpdesk plus some basic sysadmin/AD fuckery. So a tad above my experience level presently.
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# ¿ Sep 6, 2017 19:06 |
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Sickening posted:Well, you are the perfect person to try it then. Seriously, the core of MDT is file living on a sharable location. No services installed, no constant uptime needed, its something your senior guy should have given you right away. Took a longer look. This actually looks pretty fun and seems like something I could setup in a week or two just in my spare time in the office. Might pitch it to my manager because lordy would it make our lives simpler.
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# ¿ Sep 6, 2017 19:16 |
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IndustrialApe posted:People here are still using post its to label computers, understandably this lead to computers being scrapped that weren't supposed to be scrapped because there was data on the machine that was still needed. Unfortunately we still do this internally to keep track of inventory in our storerooms. It's helpful, when replacing a laptop, to just be able to put a sticky note on it saying "Do not reimage until x date." Or if we have damaged systems, putting them in a pile with a sticky note on the exact problem is useful when we eventually find the time to go yell at dell. But we don't let sticky notes get floating around in the wild on machines.
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# ¿ Sep 14, 2017 14:18 |
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Ugh we have a new York office with no onsite techs. Troubleshooting over the phone suuuuucks. So glad I don't do phone support normally.
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# ¿ Sep 14, 2017 15:43 |
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loving macbook air screws Had to swap a harddrive from a broken system to a new one. Turns out buddy actually managed to break the thunderbolt port. I have absolutely no idea how, but display out was hosed, it wasn't the refresh rate, cleared PRAM and SMC, safe mode, the admin account. Happened to every monitor and TV I connected it to regardless of input method, and a known good system was fine on all of them. Like it's a one in a million failure but I legitimately have no idea what else it could be other than hardware.
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# ¿ Sep 22, 2017 21:27 |
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# ¿ May 15, 2024 03:47 |
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xzzy posted:Our mac group maintains an iron grip on mac hardware here. If your mac doesn't phone home and give an expected response a couple times a week its hardware address gets blackholed and the only way to undo it is turn in your computer to the help desk so they can reimage it. god that sounds like heaven. Actually, related subject to that. I'm responsible for testing Windows 10 in our enterprise environment. We're a smallish shop, 750 employees of whom roughly 20% use windows machines. We've just finally started implementing SCCM, and the plan for phasing in Windows 10 machines is to simply not bother upgrading our current users but start giving windows 10 machines to newhires and for replacements/migrations. Anyways, so I'm responsible for testing Windows 10 and making sure that it doesn't break anything/everything. Besides simply testing for application compatibility, what should I be looking out for on my list of things to test? Right now on my checklist I have WSUS updates, SCCM integration, imaging with MDT, pushing MSI deployments, Bitlocker, printers (ugh), connecting to our NASes and wifi, group policies, and binding to domain/AD management. Anything obvious I'm missing in my list of things to test and certify before release? Have around 2 good weeks before I need to give the yea or nay.
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# ¿ Sep 25, 2017 18:26 |