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Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine

Nick_326 posted:

:stare:

I've never heard of this comic, so if someone could explain :wtc: is going on here, I'd appreciate it. My feelings range from "sheer confusion" to "this is the greatest way to end a comic, ever".

Cow and Boy was a pretty mediocre gag a day strip that occasionally went beyond the average but got booted off syndication. The creator tried to continue it as a webcomic, probably as a temporary measure until he could get it back into papers, but it didn't work out. The last month or so has been the Cow and the Boy discussing their inevitable end.

That single strip pretty much made the whole endeavor worth it because hot drat, that's how you end a strip.

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Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine
The single funniest Fingerpori, even more than the viperless milk or the cavalcade of train jokes, is the strip that reveals that the Phantom's chair is the lair of a tinier mouse Phantom.

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine
I like to think that Mandrake and Lothar, instead of explaining Humanity's position in the food chain, have just declared dominance over the entire planet.

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine
They didn't smile because holding a smile for the better part of the hour while the film exposes can be a bit tricky.

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine

Julet Esqu posted:

Sally Forth


That's a pretty drat good Adam Smith, Ralph.

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine
Actually, yes, you can be either too tall or too short to be an astronaut. NASA does not gently caress around regarding people who get shot into space. If you're over 6 feet 4 inches too bad.

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine
Here are the requirements to be a US Grade A Space Man.

Ironically you can be as short as 58 inches, but you have to be at least 62 inches tall to be a pilot. But on the other end a 'mission specialist' can have an inch on their pilot, 76 to 75 inches.

Throwing people into space with the world's most developed explosion is serious business.

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine
I hope this all leads to JJJ thinking Robbie is Spiderman.

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine

BlankIsBeautiful posted:

Yep, could be. She'd be a Rainbow Girl though, I'm pretty sure.

Or a Job's Daughter. Masons love them affiliated bodies.

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine
What a colossal poo poo move.

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine

BlankIsBeautiful posted:

Jane's World


Yep, I'm convinced that Skye is being the dick here. She barely knows Jane, and vice versa (after only one date), and she's already aggressively pushing to insert herself into Jane's life. Forcing the "out of the closet" issue, especially with a close family member, is an utterly rear end in a top hat move.



Yeah, the poo poo move I was talking about was just assuming that everyone would be better out of the closet. When Jane's Mom disowns her and calls her a sinner and spawn of the devil I bet Skye will be shocked. Just shocked!

Even if it all turns out okay deciding that someone else needs to come out is scummy as gently caress.

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine

Darthemed posted:

Doesn't science-man know Tony Stark's phone number?

Sunspots. No, seriously.

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine

Midnight Moth posted:

Dustin

I have to agree. Why the heck would any city build a new library in this day and age?


It may come as a shock but there are people who do not have the ability to grab a Kindle and load it full of books. Libraries are great because they are accessible to any economic class. Support your local library.

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine
Well you wouldn't use an atlanticistic gun, would you?

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine
They must have paid Kraft by the alliterative, Jesus.

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine
As great as Clown 9 and Iron Jonah are, the Mole Man Saga is probably my favorite Newspaper Spiderman story.

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine
Take the test in a month or so and you'll be some other animal person.

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine
Boil bags are super handy if you want to whip up one pot meals!

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine
The world's safest promotion, apparently.

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine
Isn't the artist actually a graphic designer or something? That's probably a big reason the art has very little impact panel to panel. Not to mention the inker is a complete novice.

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine
Oh my god, JJJ realizing the true impact of super-brawls. I'm glad even Newspaper Jonah has a limit to how low he'll go to catch Spiderman.

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine
Rap has been on comic books since the genre began.

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine
And then he rubs it in Peter's face when he beats the bejeesus out of the kid during Ultimate Knights AKA Ultimate Moon Knight's Whacky Costume Adventures.

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine
When it's your rich-rear end uncle and you want to be in the will you don't.

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine
The surgery wasn't just cosmetic.

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine

Wanamingo posted:

Well then why don't more people have lightning powers if all it takes is a bit of surgery?

Same reason why everybody in Big 2 comics doesn't walk around with superpowers of one sort or another: :effort:

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine

Raskolnikov38 posted:

So two people suffocated or starved to death and Tracy's just going to let that slide :stare:

Dick Tracy has directly lead to so many corpses that the natural workings of life's cessation are nothing but an opportunity for a bon mot.

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine

My Lovely Horse posted:

Theater companies always perform plays exactly as written and wouldn't dream of changing the structure, and cynical world-weary police inspectors are walking databases of literature.

They do if they don't want to get sued into the ground.

Theater companies, I mean. Obviously an insufficiently dramaturgic policeman would have his issues handled in the department before it went that far.

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine

BlankIsBeautiful posted:

Nemi

Huh. I got nothin'.

[Ben Stein]Anyone? Anyone? Anyone?[/Ben Stein]

:v:

Nemi, despite having normal sized hands, is exceedingly clumsy using the phone's touch screen.

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine
Yeah, it was the one about the woman with the trained bear cub or something.

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine

Mr. Squishy posted:

They're swans, you idiot. And no, they mate for life.
Who ever described geese as romantic? They're maybe the least romantic of all waterfowl.

But to answer his original question, no, Geese are not rapists and necrophiles. Ducks remain the worst bird, sexwise.

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine
Oh my god that Anansi is spectacular. Also Riki Tiki Tavi looks like a rodentine Heckbender.

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine
A hot dog is a sandwich, Boston can get bent.

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine
With this first taste of nepotism, Tommy won't rest until he hops strips over to Judge Parker.

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine
We stopped riding around on horses, for one.

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine
Lost Side really feels like it's aimed at a middle school crowd, and it certainly doesn't feel like it's out of a 6th's grader's grasp.

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine

Mr. Bill posted:

This strip is bullshit. Banks aren't open on Sundays, so #2 couldn't have gone to church. Obviously.

It's Wednesday evening service.

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine

Redeye Flight posted:

We appear to be operating on Redwall Size Conventions here, wherein creature size serves as a general rule of thumb instead of an absolute. That way, when the largely mouse-populated Abbeydwellers encounter a badger, he only stands about two or three of them tall instead of being the size of a small house.

Thankfully we're not operating on Redwall Racial Purity Conventions. Yet.

Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine

don Jaime posted:

So the setting is definitely not "the states" but the American government agency NIMH is active here?

They're in Britain, and they're probably going elsewhere to fight the dastardly department of health. I mean, why the hell would you keep Toad around if you aren't going to give him a flying car?

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Mr. Maltose
Feb 16, 2011

The Guffless Girlverine

Midnight Moth posted:

Regarding Inspector Danger, that has to be the dopiest marine biologist I've seen, and I know quite a few. They're actually fairly active and outdoorsy since they do a lot of coastal work and go sailing around on boats a lot.

He builds rapport with the barnacle by resembling the barnacle.

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