CM Punk signs with UFC

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Hammer House: Stinger Splash Zone > CM Punk signs with UFC

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LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

DumbWhiteGuy posted:

And he was over 40

Except Toney had legit fighting experience, not just a maybe blue belt from being friends with Rener Gracie

# ¿ Dec 7, 2014 07:30

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# ¿ Apr 29, 2024 06:23

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

BJ Penn beat the poo poo out of Diego Sanchez for 23 minutes

Diego's tactics were: bad wrestling, terrible haymakers, MEAN MUGGING

None of it worked

# ¿ Dec 7, 2014 08:23

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

MysteryNad posted:

Punk is at least as qualified a fighter as Herschel Walker was, I have no doubt Joe Silva can find a Greg "Nudge" Nagy for him to fight.

Or Punk vs Nudge

# ¿ Dec 7, 2014 08:24

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

Punk should fight the blond kid in this thing https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RzSAO8op0ow

# ¿ Dec 8, 2014 01:47

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

I'm waiting for the invitation to train at Hammer House

Which is just Mark Coleman bellowing to the four winds on his porch.

Also, since he's got a black belt, how about Punk vs Al Bundy?

# ¿ Dec 9, 2014 04:10

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

Dangersim posted:

Yeah an important thing to note is the commission won't approve a fight with a good experienced guy against a 0-0 guy.

Looks like Punk's gonna make his debut in Japan!

# ¿ Dec 9, 2014 21:22

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

1st AD posted:

They need to get Jake Shields back in the UFC. No knockout.

A dude that's not even a blue belt versus the AMERICAN JIU JITSU BUZZSAW?

That's cruel

# ¿ Dec 11, 2014 05:50

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

Yuriy posted:

yo when is brandon thatch coming back, he was a loving killer and he hasn't fought in over a year

Rukus vs Wonderboy on the Brown vs Saffiedine card in February.

# ¿ Dec 11, 2014 05:58

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

Punk's favorite all time fighter is Dan Henderson so he's not all bad

# ¿ Dec 11, 2014 08:44

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

maffew buildings posted:

Punk is a larger than average guy but i don't see how he isn't going to look smaller and physically outclassed at middleweight. RIP CM Phil

Who are the guys that have never lifted A Weight?

# ¿ Dec 11, 2014 08:53

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

Dangersim posted:

I like Condit because he gives tall skinny guys hope.

Gangly violence monster

# ¿ Dec 11, 2014 09:44

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

Bundt Cake posted:

It is good how people are rationalizing that CM Punk will have better training so he has a good chance to beat his first opponent, because they're discounting the fact that his first opponent will probably have natural ability and also a non-old body. I think if we were anywhere but the internet forumsphere that in an average group of 18-31 year old males, probably half could beat up CM Punk.

Chick Magnet Punk vs Mage of Blackest Night

# ¿ Dec 19, 2014 15:24

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G90YcgwAZTM

Yoshihiro Takayama shows what happens when "pro wrestling" is your only combat sports background

# ¿ Dec 23, 2014 08:26

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

Captain Log posted:

This is still an excellent display of what the words "Refusal to die" mean.

"Bushido spirit" translates to "facial reconstructive surgery"

# ¿ Dec 23, 2014 08:33

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

Captain Log posted:

Ben Saunders vs. Brandon Wolff is still the longest combo after it's landed and I don't care how many time I have to post it. Everything past the dick kick is insane.

And what will happen if CM Punk faces a competent striker.

http://www.ufc.com/media/Saunders-vs-Wolff-UFN-16-Prelim-Fight

Edit - No joke, I see eight knees in a row then twelve a little later - then loving FIFTEEN in a row a little later.

Still the worst beat down I've ever seen.

There were like 50 knees because Killa B hates faces

# ¿ Dec 23, 2014 08:38

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

You should use a reverse Boston crab https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YnLi3vtJBRc

# ¿ Dec 29, 2014 01:26

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

Is Coach Cush gonna greenlight Punk?

# ¿ Dec 31, 2014 22:04

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

Skip My Posts posted:

I bet that 40 year old guy who is too afraid to drink a beer is gonna kick some rear end!

Benson Henderson said he doesn't drink and he has won fights

# ¿ Mar 4, 2015 22:17

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

Street Horrrsing posted:

Toxx: CM Punk's debut opponent willl be more legitimate than Kimbo Slice's debut opponent for Bellator

Kimbo is fighting Ken Shamrock

# ¿ Mar 4, 2015 23:34

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

Cabbit posted:

This joke would have worked better with him having a cigarette or weed, things that emit smoke.

It's his first time with a beer, he doesn't know how they work.

# ¿ Mar 26, 2015 19:38

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

Fozzy The Bear posted:

and we also have this doofus as ref.
http://www.fightsite.hr/Media2/beltran%20mike.jpg

He is a Dwarf Lord and you should show him the proper respect

# ¿ Mar 27, 2015 02:20

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

triplexpac posted:

One of the craziest things I learned about wrestling is that they didn't book Butterbean vs Bart to punish Gunn for winning the tourney they set up for Dr. Death to win.

Like it made perfect sense: "Oh you beat our guy did you? Well now you have to fight Butterbean fucker"

But no they actually thought Gunn had a shot in that fight and wanted him to win.

Dr Death vs Alexey Ignashov is even sadder. Let's put an old wrestler in against a scary-dangerous kickboxer, sure that'll work.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f4T6layh2CU

# ¿ Jul 25, 2015 01:42

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

Roman Reigns posted:

Also he's a bit of a wiener. And he poo poo his pants one time.

both proud mma traditions

# ¿ Jul 26, 2015 00:46

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

uncleKitchener posted:

I don't hate on Punk as much as other people because he believes in himself. That's enough to make you a decent person and a role model to youngsters.

As long as he keeps a positive attitude even with losses, I'll be interested in what he does in the future.

I don't think there's even been someone like punk in MMA as long as I can remember. He's sort of unique.

I think I may know who this is but I've probably forgotten his name.

WAYNE WEEMS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k3NFZwooqk8

# ¿ Jul 26, 2015 05:12

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

Chokes McGee posted:

So he gets to gently caress around on national TV and get paid for it, is already financially secure, doesn't have to worry about saving face, no longer has to worry about rear end-eating staph infections, and gets to go home to AJ Lee regardless.

Livin' the dream

About that

WARNING, :siren:

Top staph infections in mma history

# ¿ Jul 26, 2015 05:50

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

argondamn posted:

Dillon "Trouble" Pousson had at least 3 more pro fights than cm punk.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xBm-cMuSaxw

And now he's banned from his gym.

It takes a confident well-adjusted man to walk out to Taylor Swift.

A dude on a semi-recent UFC card walked out to Shake it Off

# ¿ Jul 26, 2015 19:40

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

Optimist with doubt posted:

Yeah but in that article they talk about pulling fighters for the staph. No z-pack and good luck out there. Real actual fights were canceled.

Tons of fighters claim they had staph after fights. They just didn't pull out, probably because they needed the money

# ¿ Jul 26, 2015 23:57

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

Droopy Goines posted:

what a terrible slumber party

# ¿ Jul 27, 2015 22:22

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

Captain Log posted:

Can CM Punk fight Herschel Walker?

Please?

Bring back Greg "The Nudge" Nagy, Walker's first victim

# ¿ Jul 28, 2015 04:31

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

Yuriy posted:

gently caress you, Joe owns and Punk couldn't replace him a million years

Joe is a bad commentator, unless you like hearing that a sloppily wrapped headlock is a SUPER DEEP GUILLOTINE! THAT IS IN TIGHT! oh he's out

# ¿ Jul 30, 2015 17:54

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

Aesop Poprock posted:

How can anybody dislike Joe Rogan?

He is bad and dumb and says bad and dumb and terrible things

# ¿ Aug 1, 2015 14:43

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

Fake dorks in past UFC games that could beat up CM Punk:

- Shaq
- Skrape, Punkass and Mask, the TapouT crew (RIP CHARLES LEWIS, NEVER FORGET :angel:

)

# ¿ Jan 13, 2016 01:56

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

Bubba Smith posted:

The 12-10 guy probably has some decent skills despite being a bad fighter. tons of fighters have poor looking records, doesn't mean that they can't beat the poo poo out of a striped white belt.

cm punk vs mark hunt

# ¿ Jan 14, 2016 06:16

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

BGrifter posted:

The funniest outcome would be Dana finding the saddest string of cans in MMA history so Punk can go 20-0. Have him fight a guy with no arms or something. Maybe a couple legally blind opponents. In 10 years they can have him fight a 61 year old Ken Shamrock.

Kyle Maynard would still beat Punk

# ¿ Feb 5, 2016 05:36

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

TheKingslayer posted:

Which one did he beat then...?

Anthony's uncle

# ¿ Feb 14, 2016 19:23

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

Josh Barnett said Nakamura had one of the quickest double legs he's ever seen. I wrote about Shinsuke's MMA career here

http://uproxx.com/prowrestling/before-the-swag-chronicling-shinsuke-nakamuras-mma-history/

Also if you want to feel super sad, watch Alexey Ignashov vs Dr Death

Because why not put a wrestler vs a really good kickboxer?

# ¿ Feb 15, 2016 21:51

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

Punk, there is no dog and that cop wasn't 5 feet tall

# ¿ May 25, 2016 13:29

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

Halloween Jack posted:

Getting hit in the head and smiling about it?

Punching lips off faces

# ¿ Jun 28, 2016 19:50

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

It's far-fetched, but sure, Punk could win 3 fights. But I don't see him beating Denis Siver to get that title shot

# ¿ Jun 29, 2016 01:23

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# ¿ Apr 29, 2024 06:23

LobsterMobster: Oct 29, 2009; "I was being quiet and trying to be a good boy but he dialed the right combination to open the throw-down vault and it was on."

"Walter Foxx is ten times brighter than your bulb at the bottom of the tree merry xmas"

Helicity posted:

Is smearing yourself in your feces a valid MMA tactic? If so, Punk has a chance of winning because most people wouldn't punch a poop golem.

You say that, and yet 2 of Travis Browne's 3 losses are by KO.

# ¿ Jun 29, 2016 13:41

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Hammer House: Stinger Splash Zone > CM Punk signs with UFC

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