The Puppet Master posted:

What spreadsheet?

Aydjile posted:

alright then. how about this one?

me - hello

her - hey, how are you?

me - lets meet in real for a little chat. smoothie at starbucks or something like that. i really eager to know if your personality would match the looks. ))

her - I joined okcupid recently, and it seems many men are not interested in 'chit-chat' and want to meet straight away. I can't speak for all women but before I meet a man I don't know I like to make sure it's a good idea. And that we can hold a conversation. And that he's not crazy. For me that means an exchange on this website first. Is that ok? Actually, the thing about me is my mind and creativity. Looks are not my main angle.

me - i would totally disagree - anyone can write anything; to create any appearance or desired effect. so reading someone text would develope zero information about their personality. unlike in real life; where body language, tone of voice and attitude would provide me with everything i need to know. but in this case - even behind your profile there could be sitting a fat dude in overwashed and sweaty singlet; pretending as shy girl. ))
so for me or any other man who is not interested in wasting time in polite and boring conversations about neutral topic with someone who they never seen - that would be pretty normal thing to ask someone to meet in real.

her - actually, no they can't, you need to be able to do it. Not everyone can write well, not everyone can hold an interesting conversation. if someone writes with spelling mistakes or bad grammar, it speaks volumes. do you live in a bubble? or has everyone you have ever met written well and been well-spoken?
yes, weirdos are out there pretending on the internet. but women, in my opinion need to feel comfortable and safe. the same reason you would tell a young woman you love to take a cab home. i think this aspect of okcupid is not in many mens general experience of the world so they dismiss talk as chitchat.
also, time spent on what you call 'boring and polite conversation' is time and energy saved meeting someone that isn't worth it.

me - oh, i get it. you giving me the evan katz speech about - "no more bad dates."
alright then, i am sure it work out just fine for you.

her - english is your second language?

and yes,

no more bad dates.
because why?
really?

me - why would that matter?

her - i didn't say it does.
i can just tell.
no need to get defensive.
lol

that's what i meant about exchanges messages first.
you can make assessments

are you russian?

me - * sighs
this is a waste of time.
i don't wanna bother answering something that is already in my profile.

her - o yes, i must have seen it there too. but it's a look too.
i read a lot of profiles...
well, russian and hebrew don't necessarily have to be your 1st language.
i'm guessing english isn't your first.
strictly from your messages.
also, you could be israeli, or have lived in russia.
speaking russian doesn't make you russian.
i speak some french.

plus you already bothered so ...

----

so what you think my response should be?
though at this point she really annoys me. and i think its fake profile where some pseudo-gay office employee with sweaty palms trying to feel how its like.

Shumagorath posted:

you see if he merely wrapped it and threw it in the garbage or flushed it* she could snake it from the toilet's p-trap (how apropos) and misuse his genetic material

*don't do this at your place

ElGroucho posted:

A lot of insecure goons in this thread, friend

" I'm not taking to a girl at the bookstore! She..she might not think I'm interesting!"

toggle posted:

i want to know if any goons take the "advice" given in these threads and end up in garbage relationships or being stabbed on a first date

neonbregna posted:

I am thinking of using this thread to set up my next first date. Hopefully stabbings ensue

Hobohemian posted:

Ask her if her self-esteem is low enough to date you and if not, how can you help lower it until it is.

JakeP posted:

I dont get it, no one I have met on OKC has actually been using it to make friends, its a service for finding dates.

Coolness Averted posted:

So some random kid liked me and sent me a message. Looking at their profile, they of course know everything (as only a 21 year old does) with strong internet sjw explanations to over 37 pages of answers, with intro to feminism/a freshman's guide to socialism stuff about the evils of pornography, prostitution, and money. So I figured I'd be a goony goon and troll them/have a debate about how empirically regulation has helped sexworkers vs criminalization.

Here's how it worked:
: So, starting off with a debate-ish question. You mentioned prostitution shouldn't be legal, but it seemed more like your justification was more why prostitution is bad. If it's going to happen either way, wouldn't it be better to offer protections and rights to sexworkers?

: I was 13 when I was on drugs and being trafficked if you think the recent vote to decriminalize will keep us safe your sadly mistaken. I was gagged beat and raped and whether it's legal or not the John the pimp and the pornographers all work together, and they don't care how bad were hurting it's all profit driven. If you've never hit the streets before in a skirt hustling you should probably take a seat.

: https://youtu.be/9bkpotR3L4k
: https://youtu.be/_YpHNImNsx8
: For a article written by a man on the topic phd of psychology here it is http://site.nomas.org/does-consensual-prostitution-exist/


Yeah I'm not touching that.

YeahTubaMike posted:

my okc profile picture is of me with a guy's arm around me, but he is not, nor has he ever been my boyfriend, and our relationship is so brother-sisterly that it didn't even occur to me that i might be scaring dudes away from my profile with it.

anime was right posted:

ikea, high

Drink-Mix Man posted:

Business Gorillas posted:

since i'm new to this, should i assume that if i message someone and they visit my page but don't message me back, i'm not giving them the charity gorilla dilz for the cure?

YeahTubaMike posted:

he straight up said "let's get together soon" and gave me the old fade-out

Jubs posted:

She's cute.

Hooplah posted:

Unless you're full-on vegan, you really have no moral high ground vs. a hunter that eats his/her prey, imo.

Although yeah the severed head is a bit much

Dienes posted:

I just respond to unsolicited dick pics with a pic of a different, larger dick.

Lufiron posted:

it's a faux pas that shows a lack of self control

much like making GBS threads and pissing all over yourself instead of holding it til you get to a toilet

paco650 posted:

train your roommate's bird to screech "cummies!" every time it sees a woman.

Noctone posted:

Goons using hyperbole to defend minority opinions why I never

Edgar Allan Pwned posted:

Hey goons im new to online dating. I will not discuss min/maxing dates because gently caress that. I have a windows phone and it does not have a good tindr. But okcupid has a lot of 30 yr olds. Is there a better alternative for young 20's?

Business Gorillas posted:

I didn't send her anything because I love satan and premarital sex

toggle posted:

i make love to my computer and it is great. the modern world owns

Captain Yossarian posted:

Nigga that's a bearded dragon

mobby_6kl posted:

okcupid.jpg:

Stinky_Pete posted:

I thought the one on the left kinda had a smile like the , and also that's the name on the profile, and I guess it was a stretch to imply that this says something about people from England

Breetai posted:

Otisburg posted:

chatting back and forth with a qt on tindr, things are going p good and she seems cool. she's studying to work in a similar industry to mine, i mention cool i work at such and such place. she says oh really i start there in a week. uh oh. okay there are two buildings, which one? ofc mine. ofc in a position where i could potentially be at least semi-supervisory to her, ofc in an overlapping shift.

so i have to awkwardly back off and say "welp i guess that kind of puts the kibosh on asking you out... so uh i guess i'll see you around there, and uh it's a great place to work glhf"

thanks, obama

Otisburg posted:

nah gently caress that. i'm tryna climb that ladder and that's just asking for drama i don't want.

HerStuddMuffin posted:

Nothing will endear you to upper management faster than a sexual harassment lawsuit. True fact.

Otisburg posted:

remember a bunch of pages back the girl who's profile was literally "i will murder u" but she was real sweet about it?

Setzer Gabbiani posted:

One good okc profile trope is when people make pages that read like a millenial backpage post





only to spend the last couple paragraphs musing about why people might think they like to gently caress


while at the same time namedropping their tumblr profiles that have posts like this

http://thelaceserpent.tumblr.com/post/52033018437/prostate-play-anyone

92% match

Maoist Pussy posted:

Non-monogamy is actually really good- if there is a no-cucking rule!

mobby_6kl posted:

So I got Tinder working with a fake facebook account and got a couple of matches after using up all likes.

Opening lines can be tough but this girl has a photo of a cat in her profile, so that's easy mode, right? Well she didn't get my carefully crafted pussy joke (not native speaker), now what

Paineopticon posted:

I don't get it, why did you set it up with a fake account?

Paul Zuvella posted:

Holy loving poo poo you are the gooniest gently caress ever.

Shumagorath posted:

I LIVE
I DIE
I LIVE AGAIN

Groovelord Neato posted:

it's funny seeing it from the woman's side because then it makes way more sense why i do so well with matches. it's like being a giant in a land of midgets.