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Bono is seething with rage that a new white relic of the 90's is getting more Apple+Africa spotlight than he is.
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Mar 9, 2015 19:07
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Hurry up and announce the $10k price of the Edition edition so people can start the subway robbery bounty-setting process.
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Mar 9, 2015 19:09
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Wechat took 3 seconds to open. Just reach for phone dog.
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Mar 9, 2015 19:12
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I look forward to playing that wav file through a lovely watch and then demanding free groceries from the confused cashier.
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Mar 9, 2015 19:14
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Awesome. loving Speakerphone everywhere! Please make my life much worse in every enclosed space I am inside.
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Mar 9, 2015 19:16
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Hello, TSA? Do you have a Mag Safe phone charger I can use for my boarding pass?
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Mar 9, 2015 19:18
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I love the rich person fantasy land that this watch makes even easier to live inside
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Mar 9, 2015 19:19
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iLockkidsInTheGarage
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Mar 9, 2015 19:21
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I look forward to the eventual future where the straps are made from Christy Turlington-DNA derived leather.
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Mar 9, 2015 19:28
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I finally feel like I'm living in the future. Hilarious.
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Mar 9, 2015 19:31
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They should have spent more than 10k on this commercial.
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Mar 9, 2015 19:33
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Logikv9 posted:If you're buying a >$349 dollar smartwatch you better be using it for something other than time. Being seen with a better-than-sport apple watch is an app all of its own.
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Mar 9, 2015 21:03
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Apple Ring and Apple Tiara is going to be crazy y'all. I mean, i'll just settle for the Sport Ring as I don't expect to need more than 40 minutes of ring use per day. I havent made up my mind about an Apple Tiara yet until Christy Turltington tells me how joggable it is around Tanzanians.
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Mar 10, 2015 00:26
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A Rolex is an excellent comparison to an Edition watch as both are masstige goods that are not as prestigious as they want you to think they are. Rolex wraps itself in sport motifs as well. To the point where now that I think about it I'm surprised apple didn't buy the brand ala Beats. And as for the 'who will buy edition editions' question, it is pretty much a purpose built device for the foreign money kids that drive over the top luxury cars on us college campuses. Its a perfect signal of wealth as everyone in the usa that is in their age band knows the exact value of the gold watch and it will not be fake able for another year or so. Its an ideal youth status symbol shadow puppet of a fucked around with this message at 06:44 on Mar 10, 2015 |
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Mar 10, 2015 06:26
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Private does not mean not for sale to the right money. A smart Rolex-type brand might want to get out now on a high point of valuation as generational changes mean the market for selling tourbillion complications to grey-haired dentists is at a sunset and the market for selling a new generation of gold-tech begins to dawn. Its like the Corvette and other classic car brands, time is running out as kids do not lust after a car aimed at 60 year old men in an age when fewer and fewer kids bother with getting drivers licenses. shadow puppet of a fucked around with this message at 06:43 on Mar 10, 2015 |
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Mar 10, 2015 06:38
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Trivial in the sense that there is an entirely new function to 'watches' that a company like Rolex will never be able to participate in among a generation that has never worn them for prior timekeeping reasons? I don think so. Rolex will survive in some form, but the global market for seamasters and millegauss replicas is scheduled to contract harder than ceramic filled 18k gold.
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Mar 10, 2015 07:12
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If history is any guide they are just two hardware revisions away from soldering in the bands.
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Mar 10, 2015 16:42
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Apple has made a hundred billion dollars off the "hand your old iphone hardware down to your kids" concept and will be harvesting that all over again with the watch. It will only be upgradeable in the sense that Timmy gets a g1 sport band watch so parents can guiltlessly upgrade to the tungsten and titanium models in 2017.
shadow puppet of a fucked around with this message at 17:17 on Mar 10, 2015 |
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Mar 10, 2015 17:12
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Tab8715 posted:The technical improvements the iPhone has received over the years are tremendous but what could you improve on the watch? I think it'll have a life-cycle similar to consoles. Its life cycle will be probably be defined by hardware changes demanded by the point of payment industry. I hope some rear end in a top hat white hat waits for just a few months after launch to publish an unpatchable vulnerability.
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Mar 11, 2015 16:45
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I just realized that apple is going to make a fortune selling every apple watch buyer two watches. The edition users wont exercise in theirs, but still want to track their "standups" etc, so edition + sport will become the norm. Everyone getting a steel case watch will be a true devotee and want 24 hour life coverage for things like sleep and just to avoid the fear of low battery and not having heartbeat access to you lover, so they'll add a sport at checkout. The sport people, well they aren't really people but since there will be no way to hide porn on your watch they'll all keep a discrete 38mm case without a band in their pocket as a watchporn porn watching repository. Also Belkin or whoever is going to make a fortune if they can be first to get a pocket watch chain up onto the apple.com store.
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Mar 11, 2015 20:59
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Whirlwind Jones posted:I know this is mostly a joke and also wouldn't be surprised if it actually happened but basically the entire purpose and functionality of the Apple Watch at the moment is "so you don't have to take your phone out of your pocket to do something".
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Mar 11, 2015 22:22
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But, the Swiss watch industry are on the verge of a downswing due to an entire mindset shift that makes most of what you cite as faults, as irrelevant. Swatch group themselves, who own a huge number of luxury name put out an advisory yesterday that they are going to lose a lot of business to the apple watch specifically. Swatch is now turning on a dime to get their own smart versions out, likely under as many storied brands as can bear it.quote:Neither are analysts for Barclays. They wrote in a note to investors that the Apple Watch launch could result in a 6 percent annual decline in Swatch Group AG's revenue. There will always be a place for the insane oyster-presidential-moonrock-42-jewel-celestial-perpetual lump of expensive mechanical gears, but status is now shifting away from pure melt value and complication numbers to electronic edge-cutting and the top end of spenders who crave to be able to spend the most money, see Vertu et al, will have no problem at all spending $17,000 for what is the first name in status branded electronics for all people under 30. shadow puppet of a fucked around with this message at 19:37 on Mar 12, 2015 |
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Mar 12, 2015 19:33
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Rabble posted:An "Edition" apple watch is still a base model apple watch with a fresh coat of paint. I don't even need to steal a car analogy because I straight up say that no one would spend 2900% more on a gold iPad vs a space grey or silver iPad.
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Mar 12, 2015 20:55
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Rabble posted:I wish I lived in a world where I could spend an extra ten thousand dollars on something because it
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Mar 12, 2015 20:59
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And when your customer list is a direct connection to a proven list of hyper-customers with heaps of money and little sense. You could probably run the phone side at a loss on the cost of buying precious metals just to have them hooked into the Vertu concierge program and make a cut off yacht brokerage and bottle service bookings. Which makes me wonder what apple will do with their customer list of Edition wearers. They wont sell it, but I can imagine those people will have some serious infomatics applied to their collected data. Its a deep pocketed well you'll want to keep dipping into with every tech-as-jewelry product the make from now on.
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Mar 12, 2015 21:21
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The Devil Tesla posted:Speaking of Vertu, I'm pretty sure that apple is using the watch as a way to debut the idea of stainless steal and gold products so they can eventually sell iPhone Edition editions. And it will be great to see the whole lineup of mac products in full 18k gold except for the AppleTV, because nobody at apple cares about AppleTV.
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Mar 12, 2015 21:59
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With the bonus effect of creating a surplus of floroelastomer bands stateside to steal some of the air away from would-be Chinese watch band knock-offers.
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Mar 13, 2015 04:10
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They really are going to build a car, aren't they. Strong glass, metal case, batteries, speakers, color choice and software is 70% of what a car of 20 years from now will be. They just added a leather contracting competency for the watch and I'd not be surprised if the two companies they signed are unknowingly inside of an audition process for their upholstery ambitions.
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Mar 13, 2015 06:21
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Considering the only Vertu phone I've ever seen was in that "Pics from a Chinese gangster's phone" gallery that was going around, http://www.vice.com/read/triad-or-try-hard-chinese-gangster-phone-photos-authentic-reddit While I think they sell the air of riding lessons and member's clubs, I don't think you'd find much legitimate money in their customer base. Its a great phone for "I'm sitting on a million dollars of unbreakable drug cash and am likely to be executed by the state, my enemies, my friends within the next 18 months, which is the right phone for my lifestyle?
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Mar 13, 2015 16:22
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Not having two sizes meant that its was going to be viewed as a geek beacon and feel "too large" for half the population no matter what size it actually was. I don't think they'll ever escape from large/small or mens/ladies sizing with any of their future personal tech efforts. I think split size iphone models are here to stay. Not sure about the ipad since you aren't supposed to keep it on your person, but people do.
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Mar 13, 2015 16:57
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japtor posted:For anyone bored and likes to read about manufacturing processes: Well, there it is: quote:This level of inspection is, to put it mildly, fastidious beyond where most other companies would go (save Rolex). Immersion ultrasonic inspection is typically reserved for highly stressed medical implants and rotating components inside of aircraft engines; not only does this step take time, it also is typically performed by custom built machines of tremendous expense. The new paradigm is not how mechanically complex the watch on your wrist is now, but how invasivly machined it was back in Guangdong Province. The 'complication' that used to be tallied as moments sitting on your arm has moved back a step to counting needless processes in the assembly line. "But Pierre, your watch, was it anodized with a Hullman-Boyer brand redip catalyst? No? *scoff*. Pleb."
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Mar 13, 2015 19:52
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He understands that watches are not about rational time-telling. Seems perfectly well versed for watch commentary in 2015 where everyone already has a perfectly NTP synced supercomputer-of-yesteryear in their pocket.
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Mar 14, 2015 19:03
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IuniusBrutus posted:What he doesn't understand is that watches also aren't about good fit and finish and a price point. Most people in to watches enough to drop $500 on one aren't going to buy an Apple Watch in lieu of something traditional. The people buying Editions (and there are plenty of them) are going to keep buying Rolex, Patek Phillipe, Omega, JLC and other high-end brands as well - I'd be shocked if their sales dip at all as a result. You have to separate this 'most people' into two groups of 'most people under 40 with lots of money' and 'most people over 40 with lots of money' the two have very, very different expecation and desires for their status symbols. You and others are still treating near-retirement dentists as the children of phenomenal post-boomer wealth.
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Mar 14, 2015 19:19
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IuniusBrutus posted:That doesn't make any sense. People are dropping money on watches because they either like them or because they are status symbols. The apple watch will do nothing for the former group. The latter group will just start buying both Editions and luxury brands. People who are buying one just because they think they would benefit from a smart watch probably weren't buying expensive watches in the first place. Rolex et al are likely losing up to two generations worth of customerbase because they are generations not generally amused or drawn by tracking venus' eclipse cycles through mechanical gears compared to having their text messages arrive inside a more visible gold bauble. Actually the road to long term mass market survival is likely through ultra high end watchband makery, leaving the watch itself to Apple but running a coachworks operation like Pininfarina did for high end cars. shadow puppet of a fucked around with this message at 19:41 on Mar 14, 2015 |
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Mar 14, 2015 19:37
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The Apple Thumb Ring will solve the problem of needing to two hand the watch. It will allow you to navigate your watch with a single curled index finger so you can interface with your phone.
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Mar 20, 2015 05:16
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Apple is taking us right back to the gilded age of luxury where the burden of maintenance of precise instruments was overcome with sheer force of money. Take straight razors for example. I am looking forward to the SMTWTFS sets of apple watches selling for full msrp plus an $800 "charging box".
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Mar 21, 2015 04:57
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"I'm angry that people think they can derive as much personal satisfaction out of fitness without making it the center of their identity like i have!"
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Apr 6, 2015 00:48
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A lifestyle and usability company would be stupid to focus on chasing features rather than making something that could be a clunky dorky warning sign into something that is envied, discrete and accomplishes their goal of reducing interactions to the level of thoughtlessness. The AppleCar wont do 200mph or go 800 miles to the charge either, same as their mp3 player was not an all-formats wunderkind like the vastly superior and now-dead Cowon players.
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Apr 6, 2015 04:04
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What is nice is that the first person to be shot and killed for their Edition edition Apple Watch will be remembered by history for something far greater than kicking rear end on the associate track at a Biglaw. Its a ticket into the annals of history, well worth the $15,000 entry fee.
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Apr 9, 2015 02:08
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| # ¿ May 4, 2024 14:18 |
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People arguing in the apple watch thread for more than a page should be made to meet and settle their disputes conkers-style. There in the crucible of competition we can see who was smarter to invest in sapphire glass vs aluminium casings, see if ion-x glass can walk the walk as well as talk the talk, to see if the elasticity of the flouroelastomer imparts more speed on a downswing. Also I've just trademarked and patented Apple Watch Conkers™ and will be serving cease and desist notices on youtube, so dont even try.
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Apr 9, 2015 02:21
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