Final Fantasy IX - Steiner says "Princess" 89 times on the first disc

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Video Games > Let's Play! > Final Fantasy IX - Steiner says "Princess" 89 times on the first disc

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Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

Simply Simon posted:

Glad that it resonates!

Just to be perfectly fair, then, if I am going to turn this into a feature: Credit goes to Atomos199 for writing this insane piece (ABSOLUTE SUPER SPOILERS) of course!

It is, like many video game achievements, certainly impressive, but I do think eminently mockable. If you still like doing challenge runs, then more power to you; depending on your personal level of frustration tolerance and/or craving, I am convinced that doing any kind of self-imposed nonsense is just pure clean fun for you, and that's cool, fun is cool. BUT if you think that doing something of this level is anything but borderline-to-crossing madness, you lack some serious self-awareness, and that is, even in the context of a goddamn Final Fantasy LP on the SA forums, well deserving of ridicule.

honestly these posts are super unpleasant for me to read. admittedly part of that might be you kicking things off with a sick 2007-esque burn on people with disabilities, but either way this isn't really that funny to me, and seeing you work yourself into pretzels about how you totally aren't being a dick is p. hosed up.

just own up to the fact that you're insulting some guy for the sake of it.

# ¿ Jul 7, 2015 23:46

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# ¿ May 17, 2024 01:40

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

Ubiquitous_ posted:

The original designs of his 3D render did actually give him visible eyes, but then they put a belt on him.

Appreciating Steiner I think largely depends on how much you enjoyed Falstaff in Henry IV. There's a distinct influence there.

Another distinct influence is Zenigata from Lupin the 3rd.

# ¿ Jul 8, 2015 14:55

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

ApplesandOranges posted:

That's a personal preference. I personally like it when characters are unique. And there is very little forcing you to bring a particular character. Even healers aren't that difficult to work around not having.

I mean, you might as well say that FFIV or FFVI is wrecked by only allowing 5 or 4 character-parties because they have such a huge cast.

FFIV and FFVI limit your party in various ways for most of the game, and the endgame of FFVI has the multi-party gimmick.

# ¿ Jul 9, 2015 10:50

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

Rabbi Raccoon posted:

I'm glad I'm not the only one who noticed that this cool, competent Garnet doesn't stick around.

garnet is cool the whole game actually

# ¿ Jul 9, 2015 17:06

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

Metaligatr posted:

... You make a good point.

Oh great now I'm reminded of the one time I checked the Steiner tag on tumblr and immediately got a faceful of graphic Steiner/Vivi porn

thanks for sharing, champ! your eagerness to post about a 7 year old boy getting hosed really reflects well on you as a person!

# ¿ Jul 14, 2015 19:06

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

Like 80% of the songs in the game are derived from the same melody.

# ¿ Jul 16, 2015 03:46

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

Tzarnal posted:

Jewel isn't bad. Personally i'm a fan of just not renaming her.

Actually lets get into this a little bit. Names are Important. Probably even more so in media than in regular life. Any situation in which a character chooses a new name is of significance. Garnet deciding to just pick whatever thing that first catches her attention feels pretty bad.

Now sometimes someone picks a new name simply because they need to hide, fit in, etc. In those situations the new name itself isn't going to be very signficant. However Dagger as far as we can see doesn't really fit any naming patterns we see in the rest of the game either.

So just renaming her back to Garnet and moving on is my prefered aproach.

Her naming herself Dagger has a pretty big payoff later on.

# ¿ Jul 18, 2015 22:02

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

Kemix posted:

Pffft. If he were part viera we'd never have seen him. Fun fact: there ARE male viera. They just get relegated to the kitchen! Gender roles in MY final fantasy? More likely to be flipped than you'd think! Of course I could be completely wrong here. In which case feel free to smack me and 'politely' ask me to get you yer sammich.

this post sucks

# ¿ Jul 20, 2015 04:27

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

there aren't actually that many JRPGs where religion is the bad guy, but FFX and ToS were huge games that came out about the same time and it got stuck in people's craw.

# ¿ Jul 20, 2015 06:33

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

SonicRulez posted:

I can't imagine what it must be like having an existential crisis with a monkey man next to you screaming about mist or whatever. And this update reminded me of why I didn't like Steiner. He's a pompous rear end in a top hat. The question "Who decides right and wrong? You?" is something he failed to answer and will continue to not answer for a while.

that's called a character arc

# ¿ Jul 23, 2015 08:27

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

One of your party members in DQ8 is even a member of the church, though admittedly a flimsy excuse for one.

But still, the church itself in DQ8 is fine. Even the guy you do fight is partially influenced by the game's villain, he wouldn't have done anything so extreme on his own. (Though he's a jerk.)

# ¿ Jul 23, 2015 15:43

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

prishe is the best ff character

# ¿ Jul 25, 2015 03:30

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

incidentally, since they were in the last update, here's some concept art of zorn & thorn. mostly because i love the faces they're making, and the subtle differences in their make-up that barely come across in the in-game models.

you can also tell that zorn has a club design on his sleeves, and thorn has a diamond. It's a weird detail, since I don't think anyone has a heart or a spade.

# ¿ Jul 30, 2015 23:25

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

Quantum Toast posted:

Zorn has club on one sleeve and spade on the other, Thorn has diamond and heart.

Oh poo poo, I actually didn't notice that. That's cool.

# ¿ Jul 30, 2015 23:33

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

pichupal posted:

Is it just 9 and 12 that aren't on there now?

10 and 10-2 aren't on there either.

# ¿ Jul 31, 2015 01:48

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

It's hard to get a look at Freya's face with her hat blocking it. Luckily, there's concept art!

Also, minor gameplay spoilers, but am I the only one who was totally convinced she was a red mage?

# ¿ Aug 2, 2015 15:57

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

tbf a lot of anti-tech stuff in games seems to be specifically anti-military tech

# ¿ Aug 13, 2015 15:32

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

SorataYuy posted:

It just makes little sense to me because if one wants a more challenging game, then one should - go play a more challenging game. Ain't rocket magic.

Some people find it fun to rebalance games, and some people like FF9 enough that they replay it anyway, so why not replay it with different gameplay?

getting confused about this is weird.

# ¿ Aug 20, 2015 00:05

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

SorataYuy posted:

Huh. So the thought of "I have played this game to death, maybe I should leave it alone for a while" just never pops up, then? Or even "I am a master at this game, and that's good enough for me"? (In all seriousness, no, I really don't grok obsessive personalities.)

if 'playing this game a few times' counts as obsessive then where does 'screenshotting and transcribing every single part of the game and posting it on the internet' rank?

# ¿ Aug 20, 2015 02:49

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

imo this whole 'oh this female character is so much better than these other female characters' thing is really lame and serves mostly to tear down random female characters for no real reason. like yeah there are shittily written female characters out there (and in the ff series as well) but people tend to have this really, really narrow view of what constitutes a 'good' female character and whenever a character tips one toe outside that box they suddenly suck rear end.

female characters who stand up for themselves are good. female characters who are kinda wimpy are also good. what matters isn't the personality but how much screentime they get and how much time is devoted to their own development, and minus, like, Rosa, FF is usually pretty decent about that with its female leads.

# ¿ Aug 29, 2015 20:05

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

Psion posted:

Does anyone know or have a resource for the little sprites which pop up over enemies when you deal damage? I'm specifically looking for the "Miss!" one when you, y'know, miss. From any of the PSX-era FFs, not just IX.

here's FF8's. Also has hitt and trigger and such.

# ¿ Aug 30, 2015 07:29

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

BioMe posted:

Yuna's problem is that she has to be the perfect Japanese woman at all times. The only thing she's allowed to be "strong willed" about is not doing anything for herself.

Which might work if the writing realized how messed up her backstory is. Her "agency" comes pushing the idea of martyrdom on an orphan girl from a very young age. It's was Braska who had the agency since he chose to go down that path for his own reasons, while Yuna just follows her father's footsteps because she has been conditioned to think that's what you do.

But the writing doesn't, so instead it just celebrates her character motivations as her just being such a noble selfless person. Which is funny because the game is supposed to have an anti-traditionalist message, while idealizing the most fundamental traditionalist belief.

I'm not sure how you play FFX and come away thinking like this. The entire arc of the game is about her doing stuff for herself, and how hosed up her backstory is. Not to mention X-2, where she gets an entire speech about how stupid martyrdom is.

# ¿ Aug 30, 2015 19:24

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

BioMe posted:

Also Yuna flat out tells Yunalesca she still would have sacrificed herself if she didn't have to sacrifice a guardian too, if I remember right. That's not really what Yuna characterization hinges on tough. Until the end of the game the only real character motivation you can infer is that she's been brainwashed by the priests who raised her into thinking the pilgrimage is something she just has to do (or if you believe the writers, she just such a strong woman she has absolutely no self-regard, which is what I call a loving cop out). That's not a character of great agency.

I don't like this post. It sucks.

# ¿ Aug 30, 2015 23:44

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

Keep in mind this entire game started with Garnet sneaking *out* of Alexandria, so she could go talk to Cid about this. She's perfectly aware that her mother's up to no good.

# ¿ Aug 31, 2015 14:32

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

Charlett posted:

Because FF9 was the first real time I was introduced to the idea of a genderless character, I can't get behind "they/them" and just go for "s/he" and "him/her" like the game did. Which I pronounce as "Sh-he" and "himher" really fast. I use it in my writing too and people get super pissy at me but what are you going to do.

Honestly that is pretty clunky. They/them works way better. Or even 'made-up' pronouns like Xie/Xir or whatever. 'It' is kind of dehumanizing, which doesn't really work either.

Incidentally, it's way easier to keep a character's gender neutral in Japanese. As for other translations, they pretty much threw darts. Some kept Quina neutral, some gave Quina a gender. The German translation just makes them female, for instance.

# ¿ Sep 1, 2015 08:31

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

Whoops, got the spanish and german ones mixed up then. My B.

Fister Roboto posted:

It's a good thing it's not human then.

Quina isn't human, but they're pretty clearly capable of reasoning on the same level as a human and have as much of a sense of self as a human, so 'it' is still weird.

Iunno, it's not the biggest deal in the world, but they/them seems like the most elegant solution and it's weird that a lot of translations go in weird directions for something that already has an easy fix.

# ¿ Sep 2, 2015 00:10

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

Blackheart posted:

I remember, way back then, I used to read some spanish videogame Magazines which came here to south america (months late) and in the issue of Superjuegos that covered FFIX Zidan was named Yitan. Was that the official translation or just the reviewer renaming him?

I can't comment on the spanish translation, but a Japanese person would pronounce Zidane's name as 'Jitan' due to the way Japanese works. (You can hear it in this video, from Final Fantasy Dissidia)

So if he was working with a Japanese copy, it'd be pretty easy for him to assume the name was Jitan or Yitan or something instead of the proper Zidane. Alternatively, the Spanish translation might have made that mistake.

# ¿ Sep 2, 2015 00:28

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

Sum Mors posted:

To put the debate to rest: Zidane's Protect Girls ability does not include Quina.

Male or genderless can be argued, but I believe Zidane is able to reason if its a woman or not.

I believe Quina can't equip female-only equipment, either.

# ¿ Sep 2, 2015 00:43

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

there's a myth that when someone asks a rhetorical question, the proper thing to do is to list every single example of an answer to their question.

that myth is wrong.

# ¿ Sep 3, 2015 11:29

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

SorataYuy posted:

The more you talk about that guide, the more I can't help but picture the author as Sheldon from Big Bang Theory, but even stranger and more anal-retentive and annoying. Like the type of neckbearded goon even the gooniest of goons looks at, and just shakes their head in pity and disgust.

but it's okay, we aren't making fun of him.

# ¿ Sep 28, 2015 20:39

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

'this dude did something kind of nerdy in a really roundabout way in his free time. i have deemed him to have no worth as a human being.' *is posting in a thread where someone exhaustively screenshots and describes every single part of an 80-hour-long video game*

# ¿ Sep 28, 2015 20:40

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

Endorph posted:

'this dude did something kind of nerdy in a really roundabout way in his free time. i have deemed him to have no worth as a human being.' *is posting in a thread where someone exhaustively screenshots and describes every single part of an 80-hour-long video game*

*has a green lantern avatar*

# ¿ Sep 28, 2015 20:40

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

SorataYuy posted:

Huh. The acoustics in here must be really bad or something, I could have sworn I said (and meant!) something else entirely, but I shall of course, bow to you, the Superior Being. For you have obviously mastered Online Telepathy, that rare gift that lets you see across the miles and understand exactly what someone meant even if that's not at all what they actually said. Go, go! Your talents are obviously wasted here upon lesser beings such as myself!

quote:

The more you talk about that guide, the more I can't help but picture the author as Sheldon from Big Bang Theory, but even stranger and more anal-retentive and annoying. Like the type of neckbearded goon even the gooniest of goons looks at, and just shakes their head in pity and disgust.

how is this not an insult man.

TheFattestPat posted:

I once did a level 1 run of this game. I don't know if it was intentional or not, but it's neat that the game gives you the tools to make it possible. Until you get to the end of disc 3, that is.

It's pretty unintentional. Most RPGs can be beaten at level 1, or at least a minimum level. it's just due to how the mechanics work. So long as you can deal damage to an enemy, you can eventually beat them. Very few bosses in RPGs heal themselves.

# ¿ Sep 29, 2015 10:21

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

SorataYuy posted:

sounds like he went off his meds a long time ago, and looks it.

how is this not an insult

and because it's really unpleasant to read a bunch of 2007-era SA 'heh look at this nerd' circlejerking

# ¿ Sep 29, 2015 14:11

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

the level 1 gamefaqs guide person is cool, and i would be his or her friend.

# ¿ Sep 29, 2015 14:16

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

there are black magicians who use black magic, but it's a rare and difficult to perfect art. This is why Red Mages are more common - you can learn a little black magic and then supplement it with white magic.

Black Mages are golems made specifically to use black magic, which allows Alexandria to field far more magicians than a normal army would be capable of, with the side benefit of having an army that doesn't need sleep or food.

# ¿ Oct 2, 2015 15:32

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

Winklebottom posted:

I love Kuja but I always wondered why he has two feathers growing in the middle of his head.

Probably a bit of a joke. Kujaku is Japanese for peacock.

# ¿ Oct 22, 2015 10:19

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

Simply Simon posted:

The adjective for Schadenfreude is schadenfreudig, plural (and female) schadenfreudige.

Haha, I almost forgot that I was doing that because I got lost in FF9's presentation again (also there is far more story than gameplay in this part).

Gonna preface from now on to prevent possible confusion: I'm quoting from the Excalibur 2 Perfect Game Guide! This is how not to only beat the game at low level, but to also make a speedrun of it, and how to also not miss any missable items! It's elaborate as hell and maybe slightly insane!

There is actually nothing for this part I can offer which wasn't covered by the LP and OFS, as it's pretty straightforward. The guide of course gets all missable items and does everything really quickly, but nothing stands out as particularly extreme compared to a "normal" Level 1 game (though of course you are expected to save halfway to locations, reload to reset the encounter rate, and reload again whenever you still do get an encounter). So I'll leave you with boss strategies we've seen as written by the guide because I think it's actually pretty funny (and in Beatrix' case, informative). Also, that formating, man!

Gizamaluke:

code:

     .====================.                                          ____
  .--| BATTLE: GIZAMALUKE |-----------------------------------------(5 AP)--.
  |  '===================='                                          ����   |
  |                                                                         |
  | � If Zidane's turn comes up before Quina's then you can try to Steal    |
  |   once if you like - the 256/256 Elixir certainly won't hurt.           |
  | � Use Quina's Limit Glove!                                              |
  |                                                                         |
   >-----------------------------------------------------------------------<

Beatrix:

code:

     .===================.                                           ____
  .--| BATTLE: Beatrix 1 |------------------------------------------(0 AP)--.
  |  '==================='                                           ����   |
  |                                                                         |
  | � Did you know that Limit Glove is a spelling error? It was actually    |
  |   meant to be Limit GLOBE! :)                                           |
  |                                                                         |
  '-------------------------------------------------------------------------'

Well then!

Oh, one thing about the Bells:

code:

                                                       ___________________
  .---------------------------------------------------/ GIZAMALUKE BELLS /--.
  |                                                   �������������������   |
  | * Actually, you can just evade the Black Mage again. Surprisingly, you  |
  |   will still find him running around the grotto even on Disc 4. Thanks  |
  |   to Kamy41 for testing and confirming this in 2015.                    |
  |                                                                         |
  | * It's assumed that you fight the battle, but you stand to save between |
  |   40 seconds to over a minute by skipping it.                           |
  |                                                                         |
  | * If you defeat the Black Mage and pick up the soldier's Gizamaluke Bell|
  |   you'll be left with 1 bell and 1 closed door, at which point it will  |
  |   be up to you to decide what to do here on Disc 4.                     |
  |                                                                         |
  | * The Gizamaluke Bell is just as unique a key item as the Athlete Queen |
  |   or the coffees. Even if you decide to use it on Disc 4 to open the    |
  |   last door, it will still be visible that you got all of the bells. Or |
  |   you can just leave the mage alone forever.                            |
  |                                                                         |
  '-------------------------------------------------------------------------'

Those ARE some tough-rear end decisions, I agree.

Endorph posted:

cock.

# ¿ Oct 22, 2015 15:30

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

Bufuman posted:

I still like Beatrix, but something about the way she's portrayed just rubs me the wrong way. She's basically one of those characters that's written TOO perfectly. I'm not saying she's a Mary Sue, but she sure as hell hits most of the same points: loved by absolutely everyone, extraordinarily talented and strong enough to trounce the heroes with almost zero effort, never REALLY loses a fight, gets a big Save The Day moment mid-way through the next disc, and is just basically an all-around flawless individual.

Though I guess the biggest thing that keeps her out of that category is that she isn't nearly as insufferable as most of those fanfic-level obvious-author-self-insert perfection blobs. She's actually pretty likable and somewhat sympathetic.

there are tons of characters like that in games, but beatrix is female so you felt the need to point it out

not to mention her big flaw is, you know, willingly working for the guys that are genociding rat people

# ¿ Oct 24, 2015 13:45

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# ¿ May 17, 2024 01:40

Endorph: Jul 22, 2009

lol

# ¿ Oct 24, 2015 18:37

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Video Games > Let's Play! > Final Fantasy IX - Steiner says "Princess" 89 times on the first disc

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