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Elukka
Feb 18, 2011

For All Mankind
Skinks aren't allowed to take officer positions on Caiman ships but I think there was some way to do the trench coat thing with skinks and fool the caimans into thinking it's one of them?

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Elukka
Feb 18, 2011

For All Mankind
Option 2 - We need to get rid of Genghis Rex, the crapulent bastard.

e: ^^^ As a honorable agamid I reject these slanderous accusations of skinkhood.

Elukka fucked around with this message at 10:25 on Sep 23, 2015

Elukka
Feb 18, 2011

For All Mankind
Hail and present them with all the amazing logical paradoxes our crocodilian brains can conceive. (ok maybe ask the valet)

Elukka
Feb 18, 2011

For All Mankind
Guys why are we considering a fair fight?

Have the valet chirp at the robots from Pew's mouth. Just in case prepare to power the Cloacaing Device.

Elukka
Feb 18, 2011

For All Mankind

Blurry Gray Thing posted:

Whip the crew into a patriotic frenzy then follow. This insult to their honor as a fatgator might make them pay attention for once.

Elukka
Feb 18, 2011

For All Mankind

Al Borland posted:

They've probably been discofied and are now half machine half caiman all shame.

E: do you really want to see that? It may make the away team throw up and be traumatized.
If this was the case they would still retain their status as nobles and be potentially competent since they'd have competently made robot bits.

Elukka
Feb 18, 2011

For All Mankind

Applewhite posted:

SuGaBa's plan

Elukka
Feb 18, 2011

For All Mankind
I see zero problem giving even more control over to SuGaBA. Full communism.

Elukka
Feb 18, 2011

For All Mankind
Fix the lido and shields. The hull damage we've sustained is minor and unimportant. Then

CaptainSarcastic posted:

Drag the owl, the human, and the discobot up to the bridge for a photo-op as we introduce ourselves to the aliens as Space Fleet, a progressive and multispecies organization devoted to protecting the galaxy from the Sexless Threshers. Explain that we need all the help they can give us in order to battle the threat posed to all sentient life by the Sexless Threshers, then milk them dry of everything they have of value and blow out of the system.

Elukka
Feb 18, 2011

For All Mankind
I thought the jelly prostitute was actually a sponge. Which is it? I feel knowing this is important.

Also take the Pole, get out.

Elukka
Feb 18, 2011

For All Mankind

Asterios posted:

My fellow Caimen, Assembled Freemen & Sexy Older Turtles:

We are but one jump away from our target. However, it's entirely possible that The Sexless Threshers are, too.

They've destroyed countless planets. They've ripped families apart, slaughtered numerous innocents, and seem to have a bloodlust that's nigh unquenchable. There's just one thing they haven't considered.

So have we. Our Meson Beam has gotten quite the workout on this little adventure, slicing through planets like a hot knife through a valet. And, unlike the sexless threshers, we KNEW what we were doing! These things seem like mindless slugs...we were totally cool with just blowing away planet after planet, just because they annoyed us!

We're such crazy assholes, our own computer turned against us, and we warped inside its mind and killed, it and installed a DEVO-loving robot that has made our lives much worse, JUST because it hosed with us!

NOBODY FUCKS WITH THE CAIMEN EMPIRE! I'M THE KING OF THE CAIMEN EMPIRE NOW! BOW DOWN TO YOUR KING, AND LAVISH HIM WITH RICHES AND SEXUAL ATTENTION AS HE LEADS US ALL TOWARDS TOTAL VICTORY!!!

Elukka
Feb 18, 2011

For All Mankind
Found the New Caiman Republic on this maiden world, which shall be home to a million new marshes, decadence & crapulence for all Caimen, and guaranteed rights of slavedom for all humans and skinks and such.

e: Wait this was already decided. For the crabs, let the dice dispense poetic justice.

Elukka fucked around with this message at 19:23 on Nov 16, 2015

Elukka
Feb 18, 2011

For All Mankind
Give it a few thousand years and there'll prolly be a new galactic menace emerging from a forgotten planet deep in the Void. A green, scaly, profoundly lazy menace.

ggwp

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Elukka
Feb 18, 2011

For All Mankind
Any idea what Two-Fisted Fantasy stuff we might expect to see in the future? Could we see more material from Two-Fisted Steve's archives once (if) Gilganixon's finances recover? A re-release of one of the books would be amazing but I have no idea how feasible that is.

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