Prokhor Zakharov posted:

"And the Messiah did force open the door of His brutally wrecked Bronco
and verily did He shout with great vigor at the tax assayers,"

"Shoot Me, come you fuckers and shoot Me, so speaketh the Lord!"

"And yea the Lord was totally domed and dropped like a serious Bitch,
and all in assemblage agreed that His death was a great, if foreseeable, tragedy,"

Lady Gagazula posted:

quote:

Federal authorities arrested Ammon Bundy, the leader of a group of protesters occupying a federal wildlife refuge in Oregon, during a traffic stop Tuesday, a law enforcement official told CNN.

Up to eight of Bundy's followers were detained, the source said.

Shots were fired after authorities made the stop, according to the source. It's not clear who fired first.

Whip Slagcheek posted:

Call in 605-562-3140 Access 486461#
Find us on the web at
http://www.nothiefsallowed.org/

Someone call in please

A GLISTENING HODOR posted:

100% serious post:

- 2 idiots poaching on federal land try to hide the evidence by starting a fire

- to hide the evidence they started the fire, they then try to murder firefighters by making the fire bigger

- crazy gun nuts hear this and go to Oregon to stand up for the rights of poachers who attempt to kill firefighters

- the crazy gun nuts took over a federal building (a bird watching station)

- the internet coins the terms Yokel Haram, Y'all Qaeda, Yeehawdists, etc. to mock them

- Doomsday Preppers that make a living by working the land and fancying themselves to be survivalists realize they forgot to bring food to their revolution

- they begged for food on live tv

- PETA replied by sending them vegan jerky

- the internet replied by sending them dildos, a 55 gallon drum of lube, and the sugar-free gummi bears that make you poo poo yourself inside out

- not much happened for a while

- thousands of people who insist you shouldn't gently caress with them because "a revolution is coming" admit they can't attend the revolution because they have bills to pay and can't get out of work

- several guys say they'd love to help overthrow the god damned socialist government but can't because the god drat socialist government hasn't sent them their disability check yet

- 6 were arrested by police as they left the surrounded building to go get snacks

- the ringleader, Ammon Bundy, is arrested because he was invited to come meet a neighboring county's sheriff that said he was sympathetic to their cause. When he left, the world's most obvious trap was sprung.

- Tarp Dude, author of a book about a badass quickdraw gunfighter and doomsday prepper, spends his final days wondering why he didn't bring food. In a showdown with police he bumbled like Jerry Lewis trying to get his gun out of the holster and was annihilated by a slow-moving chubby state trooper.

- as of this writing 4 yeehawdists remain in Fort Dildo

- their opening negotiation with the FBI was "we'll stop breaking laws if you pardon us for breaking laws"

THE DOG HOUSE posted:

lol someones dead at least

Robo Reagan posted:

but they're not black/muslim looking

Robo Reagan posted:

but they're white

VectorSigma posted:

i bet they killed tarp guy

OMG JC a Bomb! posted:

Unggghh open up baby I'm Finicum!

dad gay. so what posted:

i am melting down

Yo, imma blob posted:

why's he just sitting in his car now

Cowman posted:

I got blocked on the one in the OP

dad gay. so what posted:

anyone got a link?

Whip Slagcheek posted:

Call in 605-562-3140 Access 486461#
Find us on the web at
http://www.nothiefsallowed.org/

Someone call in please

BMB5150 posted:

Someone seriously running off of Windows 98?

Godholio posted:

The Casualty posted:

poo poo what was that sound byte they just played? I couldn't hear it.